Title: To Be Loved
Rating: FRM – slash, blasphemy
Disclaimer: Not mine, no money made.
Summary: Another take on Sam saying yes.
A/N: Comment Fic - Supernatural; Lucifer/any; all he really wants is to be loved again, the way he used to be. Link: .?thread=49345925#t49345925
"Yes," Sam said, his brother solid as a stone behind him and radiating enough anger to burn out the sun.
"Yes," Lucifer repeated, one eyebrow raised more in mockery than true speculation. Surely there was to be some Great Plan in the works here; he would expect nothing less than last minute heroics from those he was beginning to think of as his boys. It was a shame, really; such potential wasted on two who were destined to die anyway.
That said, he didn't think for a minute they were going to make this easy on him. Fighting down to the last breath, not giving in, determined to save the world from evil, from little old him...yadda, yadda.
Sam Winchester only nodded, Dean making no move to charge in like the bull he was to defend his baby brother. "You can have my body, Lucifer," he told him and Lucifer could see his Destined Vessel open up before his very eyes. "I say yes."
Before Lucifer could move, Sam held up a hand, saying, "But I have conditions."
Lucifer couldn't help the smile even as he sighed and, for once, resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Far be it from him to ruin a good thing, especially when he was about to get his way. "Of course you do. Well, go on." He held his arms out wide and smiled his best encouraging smile. "No time like the present, as they say. What's on your mind, Sam?"
"I'll share my body with you, SHARE," Sam told him. "But no evil. No death, no destruction – and you tell your demons to stand down, agreed?"
"Interesting..." He drawled, snapping his fingers. "What's in that for me?"
"You get a body that won't wear out and will never die," Sam surprised him. "And you get to stay here on Earth, out of Hell."
"Could do, could do. Oh, but what if Daddy-dearest doesn't like that?" the archangel chided, sly grin on his lips at the thought. He knew the Winchesters had had their falling out with dear old Dad, just like he had...but to denounce Him altogether...this was getting interesting. "And he won't, you know. There was a reason I was cast out, after all."
"I don't rightly care," Dean broke in, body a rigid testament to his dislike for this plan. But, and let's face it, whatever it was, it was all they had. "He can go screw for all the help he's given us. If he wants another way to avoid the apocalypse then fine, great; but until then he can shut his pie hole. I don't give a rat's ass about what God wants."
Lucifer winced, never the less grinning in approval. "Ouch. So hostile, Dean."
"Bite me," the older Winchester snapped.
"Hm, maybe later. Sooo...no evil, no apocalypse...and I tell my demons to take a hike." The Devil pretended to think about that for a moment. The plan on its face had its merits. He couldn't care less about the demons; after all, they had just been a means to an end. The plan had really been just to get out of Hell; thumbing his nose at Dad and the Mud Monkeys had just been the key lime icing on his cupcake...
And then he pouted, just to get the Bitchface. "But what if I like evil?"
To his surprise Sam only moved closer, into his personal space, forcing the Father of All Evil (Lucifer snorted at that) to look up. The eyes found under those ridiculous bangs caught him by surprise. They were confident, soft, almost knowing. For one moment Lucifer was almost afraid at what they might know.
"Read my mind."
Out of the corner of his eye he saw the Michael Sword lurch forward, only to be held by Castiel's hand on his arm, grim look of frustrated disapproval on the borrowed lips. So it was still to be a sacrifice on Samuel's part then.
Still, there must be a catch if they were entertaining the notion at all.
"Why should I?" he asked, feeling the uncertainty and not liking it. Searching for the trap beneath the honey.
Again the human surprised him. "Do you really want all of this public?" he asked. "No traps, no tricks, I promise. Read my mind."
Startled and curious, he did. And marveled at what he Saw. Everything. Sam Winchester knew everything.
/You don't want to be evil, hated. You never did./ the thought sighed. /I know what it's like to want to be loved by someone who can never love you the way you need. To be loved for who you are instead of who they think you should be. Who they need you to be. To be wanted./
As Lucifer stared, frozen to the ground, Sam smiled, sad and sure, and raised one large hand to cup his borrowed face. Unable to resist, he leaned into that touch. Hell might be lakes of fire, but he had been cold for so long.
/You were right. We are too much alike to fight this anymore./
\\But what of you?\\ For the first time in millenia, and the first time ever for a human, Lucifer found himself burned by the desire to defend, to protect. \\You have a say in this,\\ he found himself urging. \\You don't have to sacrifice yourself for...\\ ...the world? His brother? Their Father?...him?...\\...anything.\\
But that was when Sam smiled, a new, boyish light in the green eyes as he caught the wash of foreign emotion behind the thought.
/What if I want to? What if I'm as tired of fighting and being alone as you are?/
In a return wash of emotion Lucifer felt the loneliness and exhaustion that came with fighting one's destiny, just as sharp and unbearable as it had been all those millennia ago. More so because it so exactly matched his own.
\\Your brother - \\
/Has Cas,/ Sam told him, leaning down to touch him, nose to nose. Not quite a kiss, not yet. Lucifer had to consent, too. /Tell me I can have you./
That was it. No thinking about it, no planning, no contingencies. He didn't need them.
Being held by a human soul wasn't the same as being held by another's Grace; it was warmer, more complete; the light more golden than the harsh, unforgiving white of Heaven.
Sharing the large body, curled easily against Sam's soul, Lucifer let his Grace soak in the lazy summer heat of it, feeling more than hearing the answering sigh of contentment brushed against his cheek as Sam did the same.
Subject: Re: Fill - To Be Loved (part 3 - Lucifer/Sam, FRM - slash, blasphemy)
Speechless. This is amazing.