A/N This we'll consider movie canon up to X2 and I suppose Origins, then we're taking a turn in a totally different direction, so get X3 out of your mind. Remy's eyes are comic canon.
Remy LeBeau was man of simple pleasures. Tailing an assassin might not be the average man's idea of a good time, but he was having a hell of a time. Mostly because the other man had no idea he was being followed. He must be brand new to criminal life, Remy thought. He's still shiny. It had been just bad dumb luck on his part that he chose to make a suspicious transaction at the same bar Remy was at. Remy, being the observant, curious and bored man that he was, decided that it was a lovely night for a walk and followed the man out.
It didn't take long for him to figure out he was an assassin, the Assassin's Guild's training left tell tale signs. Remy hadn't seen him before, not that he made a point to hang around with hired killers, but that combined with the way he was operating made Remy think he was new to the active field. He was sloppy by any standards and just not as sneaky as the full-fledged master assassins that were running around. So not just an assassin, but a newbie assassin. This was going to be fun.
The assassin wove through the streets of New Orleans, sometimes backtracking or taking weird routes to lose any potential tails. Luckily, Remy was very good at subtly tailing people, that's why he was a master of his craft and this assassin was greener than fresh spring grass.
Remy was a little surprised when the man pulled his late model Toyota into the parking lot of a bar controlled by the Thieves. At least he knew to drive a non-descript, disposable car rather than something flashy, though it was a stupid move if he planned on doing a job in a Thief controlled bar.
Remy waited a few minutes before following the assassin into the bar. Sure enough, he'd taken a table in the farthest corner and fixed his eyes on a waitress. Remy couldn't blame him, she was in tight jeans and a low cut black shirt with a little black waitressing apron tied around her waist. The way she moved made it very obvious that she knew how to use that curvaceous body to her advantage. She leaned over a group's table, giving a very generous view down her shirt. Her hair was deep brown except for two prominent white streaks wrapped into an easy bun behind her head. After getting the group's drink orders in, she made her way to Remy's table.
"Hey sugar, what can I get for you?" she asked. This close he could see just how bright those emerald eyes were. He traced her hand with his eyes as it brushed a strand of white hair behind her ear.
"Hmm, how about some bourbon tonight chère," he said.
"You got it," she answered, sashaying away. The Thieves didn't own this particular bar, just operated out of it, so they weren't exactly keeping tabs on all the employees so it wasn't too odd that he didn't know this woman on sight. Still, he wasn't sure how much he liked the way an assassin was looking at a waitress in a bar know to be the Thieves'. Remy tsked, honestly, the lack of respect.
The waitress, her name tag said Marie, came back with his drink. "Just let me know if you need anything else," she said with a smile.
"That I will, merci."
Remy was thankful his liver was so strong, if not he's either be drunk as a skunk or dead from alcohol poisoning. He had to keep buying drinks in order to keep from looking too suspicious by just sitting in a bar. The assassin kept nursing drinks too, though when Marie the waitress wasn't looking, he'd dump them in the little flower vase on the table, which was slowly getting more and more full. After two hours, and with the amount of drinks the assassin had 'consumed', he made his move, stumbling up like a drunken fool.
"Oh, won't you take me home tonight!" he started singing. "Fat bottom girls you make the rocking world go round!" He staggered to the bar, clinging to it like his life depended on it. The bartender caught Marie's eye and nodded to the 'drunk' man.
"Okay," Marie said somewhat tiredly. "Come on sugar, let's get you a cab." Marie took the arm of the stumbling man and lead him out of the bar.
"Damn," Remy muttered, following. He made it around the corner to see Marie still holding the assassin's right arm. No cabs were in sight. He twirled his arm out of her grip and whirled, sending a kick to her jaw. Marie cried out but spun with the force of the kick, using the momentum to whirl herself around, landing a series of vicious blows along his throat, sternum and kidneys. The assassin huffed out his breath, doubling over and Marie turned and took off down the alley.
"Nice," Remy said before running around the corner to his parked car. Making like a speed demon, he raced around the block, screeching to a halt at the other end of the alley right in front of Marie, making her skid to a stop. Remy leaned over and threw the door open.
"Get in if you want to live!" he called. She turned, seeing the assassin at the other end of the alley slowly trying to regain movement.
"Number one rule, never go somewhere private with someone who's willing to kill you in public, you'll just die slower and more painfully, so if it's all the same to you-"
"I'm not an assassin, I'm not here to hurt you," he said, keeping an eye over her shoulder.
"Then what are you?"
"Remy LeBeau, a thief. You need to trust me, get in the car. I'm not the one that wants to hurt you!" Marie bit her lip. The man got to his feet and started running as best he could down the alley after them. "I'm kind of going to need an answer now." A shot hit the car a foot from Marie's head.
"Shit! Okay!" she yelled. She threw herself into the car, Remy speeding away before her door was even closed. The assassin ran after them, getting a few shots into the back of Remy's car before they were out of sight. "Who the hell was that?" Marie yelled, watching the assassin grow smaller and smaller.
"Shh," Remy said. "One, inside voices. Two, seatbelts on, we don't want to get pulled over with bullet holes in the car."
"Okay, quietly, who was that?"
"That would be a killer for hire."
"Great," she sighed. Remy raised an eyebrow, between her kicking his ass in the alley and the way she reacted to an assassin, annoyed rather than scared, he was starting to like this girl. "So why's a thief helping me?"
"Some think I have a Robin Hood complex, doing good deeds and saving fair lady," he said with a wink. "I don't see it."
"Oh? Then why?"
"The idea of stealing a trained assassin's target is very appealing to me. And deeply amuses me."
"Lovely," she said. "Why is he trying to kill me?"
"You see chère, that's the thing, only you would know why. Any enemies?" he asked. She smirked.
"Only enemies that would kill me themselves," she said.
"Oh, piss some people off?"
"Always," she said.
"Well…" she hesitated. "How do you feel about mutants?"
He tipped his sunglasses down, revealing red on black eyes. "No problem here."
"Good," she said. "The only people I tend to piss off are big bad mutants, more than happy to come after me all on their own."
"Hm, sounds fun."
"So, mutant?" he asked.
"Born and raised. Well, not raised, but you get the idea," she said.
"What can you do?"
She wiggled her hand next to him. "You could say I'm a thief too. Poison skin, can turn it on and off, suck of people's life force, memories and for mutants, their powers."
"Very nice," he commented."
"I make things explode," he said.
"Exciting," she said. "So where exactly are we going?"
"We can't exactly go back to wherever you live, they already know where you work, they will know where you live," he said. "We're going somewhere safe."
Remy drove around New Orleans for awhile before turning up a long driveway somewhere in the suburbs. Her eyebrows rose as they came to a huge iron gate. He punched in a key code, scanned a fingerprint and spoke to someone on the other end of an intercom and scanned a card. The gate opened and Remy pulled through winding up the driveway to the insanely large mansion.
"Somewhere safe," she said faintly, looking around and taking in the security cameras, guards, and was sure there were more she wasn't seeing. "More like paranoid and impregnable."
"I do what I can."
"You live here?" she asked.
"Oui. But before we go in, you need to know that I'm doing what I can to protect you. This is…headquarters," he said.
"For Robin Hood and his merry band on thieves," Remy said cheerily.
"You're the ringleader of a band of thieves," Marie said disbelievingly.
"More or less. Technically I'm not in charge, but I'm high up on the food chain. You will be safe here," he promised.
"Safe in the den of thieves," she muttered. "I guess I've had stranger days."
"That's the spirit," Remy said happily. He led her into the house, waving away the curious guards. They stood aside and let him in. They were barely the front doors when a man came up to them, shaking his head.
"Remy! You have an apartment off grounds so you won't bring the femmes here!" he said, seemingly torn between exasperation and anger.
"It's not what you thing," Remy said.
"Bit of a man whore, are you?" Marie asked.
"Once in awhile," Remy said. "Look Henri, I didn't bring her here to sleep with her."
"Not that he'd get far if he did," Marie muttered.
"I like this fille," Henri said. "But what's she doing here?"
"Someone tried to kill her," Remy asid.
"Unfortunate, but it happens, no offense," Henri added to Marie. She coolly raised an eyebrow. "All I meant fille, is that Remy doesn't usually get involved with assassins, or he doesn't anymore. Apparently some lessons are harder learned than others."
"They were at the Talisman," Remy said. Henri's eyebrows flew up.
"The Talisman? Our Talisman? As in the Assassins know that is our bar and they stay the hell away?" Remy asked seriously.
"Oui. Big political no-no," Remy said. "If I didn't put a stop to it now, it would have been a slippery slope until all mutual respect is gone and our places are no longer safe grounds."
Henri nodded. "True, Pére won't be thrilled an assassin went for a target in the Talisman."
"Oui. Keeping her safe from the Assassins sends a message. Some unwritten rules we won't let them break," Remy said.
"A very strong message," Henri said. He looked Marie up and down before looking back to Remy. "You sure that's the only reason why?"
"Of course not," Remy said. "This is going to irritate the hell out of the Assassins." He put his hand on Marie's back and guided her to the stairs.
"For once I'd like to see you rescue and ugly woman," Henri called after them.
"Irritating assassins? You do have some interesting hobbies," she muttered.
"It keeps life fun," Remy said. "Sorry about mon frère, he gets worried about Guild business."
"Understandable, I guess," she said.
"You okay chère?" he asked, noticing her feisty demeanor was getting quieter.
"As well as one could be as a political tool," she said. He stopped her with a hand on her arm.
"I'm not going to throw you to the wolves for a game of politics if that's what you're worried about," Remy said softly. She looked at him challengingly.
"Oh? And why's that?" she asked.
"I'm apparently Robin Hood, remember?" he said with a wink. "This solidly falls into the 'saving fair lady' category."