I own nothing.
It was orginally going to be much shorter, but their reconciliations kept getting longer.. and longer.. and I really didn't want to make it multi chaptered. So sorry!
There had been minor fights before. In their senior year, Blaine had snuck into their school after hours and stolen the slushie machine. Private school boy pranks was a habit that died hard. Unfortunately he hadn't taken into account the fact that public schools had CCTV everywhere, and so Kurt's seemingly innocent boyfriend had gotten suspended for a week.
Kurt was furious. He'd yelled about how idiotic it was, how it wouldn't make anything better. Slushie facials were just a part of the everyday harassment, and the jocks could do much worse to them then just ruin their clothes with food dye.
Blaine accused Kurt of not even attempting to see it from his point of view, not understanding how hard it was for him sometimes to be in a completely new and unwelcoming environment.
The angry closing statement came from Kurt, "I never asked you to follow me here, Blaine!"
They didn't speak for two days. Will got Blaine's suspension reduced, but when Blaine returned to glee club, Kurt surrounded himself with the girls.
However, Blaine wasn't the type of guy who was completely reliant on his boyfriend. He could chat to Finn about whatever game happened to be on that evening, and he knew enough about Sam to ask after his family. Hell, his favourite person in the club, besides Kurt, was Mike. When Kurt was ill on his second week, Mike had taught Blaine how to 'pop and lock it' quite unsuccessfully. He ended up looking like a limp robot.
But what he didn't expect upon entering the room, was see Puck whack the chair next to him and say, "Blaine! My criminally minded bro! Get your ass here."
Shocked, but not wanting to be rude, he said "Thanks Noah." and strode purposely past Kurt, not making any sort of eye contact.
"So." The ex-juvie turned to face Blaine, "Tell me how you did it. Spare no details. I can't believe I never thought of taking out the ice berg beast myself."
Blaine spent the rest of the hour telling Puck of various pranks he and the Warblers had pulled at Dalton, and I wasn't until Artie said, "Dude, you have got to get us involved in your next prank!" that he realised all the boys were sat forward in their seats, eagerly listening in.
Blaine's eyes flicked to Kurt's across the room. He had expected the other boy to be furious, after all the boys were encouraging exactly the type of thing Kurt had yelled at him for. But Kurt's lips had curved into a slight smile, and he was completely unaware of the heated argument Quinn and Rachel were having over him.
"Yeah, why not. I'm sure I can work you guys into one of my plans."
After rehearsal, Blaine waited for Kurt to gather his books. They walked together in silence out of the room, shoulders bumping and knuckles grazing until Kurt sighed and grabbed Blaine's hand.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been so horrible. I know you meant well Blaine, but it scared me. You could get expelled. You know I love having you here. I love this." He swung their hands a little. "But if you left... I just don't want that to happen."
"It's okay. I should have told you."
A comfortable silence washed over the pair of boys and they left the school, both slightly grinning at how good it felt to have overcome their first fight.
"You know," Kurt said, breaking the silence, "it's kind of hot to have a badass boyfriend."
Blaine gave Kurt a side look and cocked one eyebrow. "Oh, really?" He smirked, tugging a little harder on their intertwined hands, and lead them to the car park.
The summer before college was horrible. It started off amazing; they were on a post-graduation high. Their days were filled with each other, basking in the sun and driving to the other's house. Nights were for sneaking out of back doors and through windows. Blaine became quite an expert at climbing the tree outside of Kurt's window, and Kurt knew exactly which steps in Blaine's house creaked when stepped on.
And then their acceptance letters came.
The pair had only spoken about college once after a seminar at school. Blaine had pressed his lips together afterwards, leaning against Kurt's locker and said no louder than a whisper, "My parents are adamant about me attending an Ivy League."
Kurt's eyes met his boyfriend's. His heart sank. There was no way he could get into an Ivy college. Blaine was intelligent, charismatic, and Kurt was sarcastic and sharp. Besides, he didn't want to return to anything Dalton-esq. It just reminded him of running away.
"Let's talk about this later." He didn't say, I've been looking at Chicago. He didn't say, I've been thinking about having a year out. He didn't say, I'm scared.
"Please Blaine. Please." Pale blue eyes begged, and Blaine ran a hand through his curls.
And so when Blaine rang him the morning when Kurt's own envelope arrived through the door, he was hit with a crippling fear.
"It's later, isn't it?"
"Yeah." Blaine sighed and Kurt's stomach plummeted even further. "Coffee shop?"
"No." Too public. "I'll come round."
The drive over dragged as worry consumed Kurt. He knew what his envelope said, and he had been looking up the distance between every single Ivy school and his own, hoping.
"I've opened mine." Blaine said as soon as he opened the door. His hair was a complete mess, and he was only dressed in sweatpants and a loose gray t-shirt.
They went into the lounge, and Kurt shook his head when Blaine offered him something to drink.
Kurt held out his envelope, and Blaine passed over his own.
Fingers slipping, he reached in and-
He sighed. It wasn't Columbia, but it wasn't Cornell either. He looked over at Blaine who was scanning the shaking paper in his hands. Kurt had always dreamed of New York, a dream solidified by their trip there for nationals. He dreamed of the city lights, but he also dreamed of Blaine.
"Two hours." Blaine looked up, his mouth twisted into a half smile. "Two hours will be okay right? I mean... it's not amazing but it's not like we'll be in different time zones..."
"Blaine." He folded up the letter in front of him. "I didn't expect us to be living next door to each other." His voice cracked a little, and he reached out to clasp Blaine's hand. A wave of emotion hit him, but Kurt couldn't figure out why he was overcome with despair.
"This is stupid." Kurt looked up, taken aback by Blaine's rough tone. But his boyfriend was using the back of his other hand to rub his eyes. "We should be happy. We've both gotten into our dream schools."
Kurt pulled Blaine towards him and into his arms. He moved Blaine's harsh hands away from his eyes and when the tears fell he wiped them away with his fingertips.
They remained curled up with each other for a while until Kurt said what he should have said in front of his locker. "I'm scared, Blaine."
They had come to a silent understanding not to talk about college; it was easier to fall back into their carefree summer ways. But Kurt felt every smile, every laugh they had together, was tinged with sadness. They couldn't continue to be BlaineandKurt with this huge thing looming over them. Before college was a shining light, something Kurt would escape to when the bullying got too much. It was his line of hope before Blaine came along. Now his two hopes collided, and Kurt knew one was sure to slip away.
Other glee club couples had broken up over the summer, Kurt worried one day when Blaine had gone to the counter at the Lima Bean. Mike and Tina had been going longer than them, and they had finished last week, because of college.
"Kurt?" Blaine waved a hand in front of his eyes, snapping back the boy out of his worrisome world. He realised he had bitten his lip so hard it had begun bleeding. Excellent.
"Sorry, what was that?" A smile formed instantly on Kurt's face as he shoved the dark topic away for other sleepless night.
"Kurt." Blaine's eyes searched his. "What is it?"
Damn that boy could read him like a book.
"I've been thinking..."
"Uh oh." A light smile faded when Blaine saw Kurt's shoulders sag slightly.
"Kurt-" He put down his coffee cup.
"I was thinking, everyone else has broken up..."
"Kurt, I really don't like where this is going." The pleading tone in his boyfriend's voice hurt more than anything.
"And you're worried too Blaine. I can see it in your eyes because it's exactly how I know I appear to you. I don't want us to break up, I really don't."
"Neither do I, so what are you getting at?"
"Maybe we should, I don't know, try it."
"See what it's like without each other."
"So you do want to break up? Kurt, please, you can't be serious. We're happy right? Are you not happy?" Blaine's voice rose slightly.
"Blaine, you aren't happy." Kurt's voice was quiet, and he leaned onto the table, reaching for Blaine's hand. But the other boy pulled away, placing his hands into his lap. "You must feel the same, this whole idea of the future is looming over us, and instead of having a carefree summer I'm worried. And I'm sick of being so worried all the time."
He took a breath. "I want to be with you all the time because I know we don't have long left... but at the same time I think we should maybe get used to not having each other around as much."
"So... you want to go on a break?"
"Yes... no... oh I don't know. I don't want us to exchange each other's stuff, I don't want to erase you, I just think we... we need time apart."
Kurt risked looking at Blaine properly. During his little speech he had been looking at the ceiling, on the floor, at the queue forming at the counter, anywhere but his boyfriend's eyes. Because they dragged you in. Blaine was terrible at hiding his emotions, Kurt could slap on a bitch face and solider on, but when Blaine hurt it showed, and it was heartbreaking to see.
The boy sat across from him opened his mouth, the shut it again. His eyes flicked hurriedly between Kurt's, like they were shaking. His eyebrows were scrunched up, lines of pain scrawled across his face.
Kurt had to look away. "I-I think I should go home."
Blaine didn't say anything, he just watched in silence as Kurt gathered his keys off the table and left. He watched him leave through the glass window, and he stayed glued to the spot for half an hour as his coffee went cold.
It was strange, as soon as Kurt got home he had expected to bawl his eyes out, but he felt a kind of calm. It was as if he had one up on college now. He was the one in control.
But as soon as he thought that, he realised just how wrong he was. He took out his phone and had a sudden urge to text Blaine, his best friend, not Blaine his boyfriend.
He holed himself up in his room for the rest of the day, lying on the bed. He felt numb. There was no point getting out tissues and sad movies and chocolate ice cream to get over Blaine, because he wasn't getting over Blaine, nor did he want to.
Kurt lay down, staring at the ceiling through unfocused eyes. He just wanted to see how they might fair in the real world, separated by more than just road. There would be work, deadlines, social lives, other guys, and jealousy to deal with.
This was just a test.
Blaine left it a week. He had a week to come up with a plan to show Kurt just how ready he was to fight for them, distance or not. Blaine knew exactly how he felt, and he was so sure this wasn't just another high school relationship. Once, when Kurt was putting pizza in the oven, he swore he could see himself in ten years time, eating junk food with his boyfriend. Maybe his fiancé. Maybe his husband. He recognised the gut feeling of certainty. Blaine always trusted his instincts. His gut feeling told him to run before the bullying got too bad, it told him to wait the extra few minutes after saying goodbye to Kurt in school to make sure he got places without a push and a shove. And right now the gut feeling as telling him not to let Kurt go.
Exactly a week after the coffee shop incident, Blaine sent Kurt a text. They weren't big on texting, preferring to ring each other, but Blaine was pulling out every trick in the book.
At 8am, Kurt was woken up by his phone. The text from Blaine read, "You'd be getting up for your lectures around now. Love your long distance boyfriend."
Confused, Kurt replied, "What are you doing?"
A few minutes later his reply was, "Check your email."
Obliging, Kurt waited for his laptop to start. He wasn't going to lie; contact from Blaine was like a drop of water in the desert. Finn was furious with him for doing something so stupid, and his dad just didn't understand at all. He'd taken to staying in his room, making lists and lists of things to pack, things he'd need, and things to do in New York. He'd watched endless horror movies in the dead of night when he couldn't sleep, and had sorted through his vast collection of Vogue.
His inbox had one new message that read, "Dear soon-to-be New Yorker, I'm coming over. If I was leaving now from Yale, I'd be there in two hours. See how time flies."
Two hours later the doorbell rung and Kurt answered it, not ready to shoot Blaine down one bit.
"So." His soon-to-be-Yale Boyfriend said as soon as the door was open a crack, "Modern technology is wonderful. We can ring, and text, and Skype. I looked up the different ways I can get to you from Yale. It would be a taxi, or a bus followed by the subway, and you can get these cards that work like top up cards. And then there is this." He shoved a brown paper bag at Kurt. "It's the long distance boyfriend survival kit. Which to be honest is a bit stupid because we'll only be two hours away."
Kurt could feel himself blushing slightly as he peeked inside.
"There's a webcam with a microphone, a map of the subway and a bus timetable I printed off, and a few of my t-shirts I know you won't wear anywhere, but I like to think of you just having them, you know?"
Blaine reached out and took one of Kurt's hands. "It won't matter. It won't matter to me where you are because I'll always have reminders of you around, just like you'll find a way to always keep me around. I'll go without my morning coffee to save money and get to you every weekend. I'll still be near enough that all you have to do is ring and I'll be there. I know we can do this Kurt. I just know."
And apparently, that was exactly what Kurt needed to hear. His face lit up and Blaine could only feel relief before he was being thrown off balance and almost fell backwards down the porch steps. Kurt's lips found his in a rush of need and comfort. It was a harsh kiss, with nose bumping and Blaine getting hit in the head by his own Boyfriend Survival Kit. But with one arm wrapped around Kurt's waist and a hand on his cheek pulling him closer, Blaine didn't care.
"I don't know what to say." Came a muffled voice from his shoulder when they finally broke apart. Blaine leant against the door frame with Kurt tucked under his chin, a position that must have been uncomfortable for the taller boy.
"Just say you won't break up with me."
"I won't." Kurt whispered. "I'm sorry; I've wasted an entire week of our summer being depressed and ridiculous when I could have been with you. I'm so grateful for you, you know. You put up with my nonsense and my worrying and-"
He was cut off my Blaine capturing his lips again.
It was only later when they had made up enough, that Kurt noticed something else in his boyfriend survival kit.
"Blaine... what is this?" Kurt pulled out a mug that said Lima Bean on. "Tell me you didn't steal from our favourite coffee shop!"
Blaine looked up from his place in Kurt's bed, looking rather ruffled, and winked. "You do love a bad boy."
They made it work the first year. It was all, how was your day honey and I miss you so much. They saw each other a good few times a month, and it was enough.
The second year was worse. Snappy, I'm busy right now, and I'll ring you back's dominated their phone calls. Excuses were given of why they couldn't meet that weekend, but definitely next Saturday Kurt would come up to Blaine's.
On Christmas Holidays in their third year, Blaine went around to Kurt's house when everyone was miraculously out.
"Why don't you like coming to visit me?" Blaine blurted out as Kurt put the kettle on.
"What are you talking about? We see each other loads."
"That's not what I asked, Kurt."
The taller boy grimaced whilst his back was turned to his boyfriend.
"Kurt. I asked." The warning tone made Kurt sigh and turn.
"I don't like Sebastian."
"What? Why?" Blaine blinked.
"He's always around. He's always hanging around you and he gets under my skin because he's always around you. And he makes these comments all the time that I know you pick up on. You just choose not to say anything."
"He's my friend, Kurt. He's my flatmate. He wants to be around because he wants to get to know you. And he doesn't make any comments!"
"He asked us who the girl in the relationship was, Blaine."
"Lots of your friends asked us that in glee club when we first started dating!"
"And I yelled at them! I yelled at Puck and I threatened to push Artie down the stairs!"
And then, it escalated.
"I can't believe you right now!"
"Sorry, do you want to tell me again how much of a stuck up snob I am?"
"That's not what I meant!"
"I have work to do! A lot of work! It's Yale Kurt! I don't get to just sit around in Time Square drinking coffee all the time! I don't have that luxury!"
"I know you don't think my course is worthwhile Blaine! But I don't need to hear it from you as well as my family. I will make it work for me! I shouldn't need to prove myself to you!"
There were tantrums and storming in and out of rooms, until they ended up in Kurt's room. Both were sat on the bed, slightly out of breath.
"You never say I love you anymore." Blaine's voice was quiet and dejected, and Kurt's heart broke just a little.
"No, you don't. I say 'I love you' and you say, 'you too'. I say 'I miss you' and you say 'I know'. What does that mean Kurt?"
"I do love you. Of course I do. And I miss you, so, so much."
"There isn't a but."
"Yes there is." Blaine closed his eyes and caught Kurt's hand, bringing it up to his face. "But we can't keep doing this. But it's hard, and we have finals this year. But we both need to concentrate on what we want."
And Kurt knew Blaine was right. How many times had he put off finishing a project because Blaine was calling, or Blaine was visiting, or he was thinking about Blaine.
Kurt passed a thumb over Blaine's cheek, over his lips, running his fingers down his boyfriend's nose. Memorising.
Then his hand fell, and his gaze wavered.
He didn't even hear Blaine leave.
Blaine was coping terribly. He could function, but he wasn't living. Sebastian left him alone in his misery, and Blaine couldn't help but feel a certain amount of hatred towards his flatmate for unknowingly coming between him and Kurt.
Each day Blaine woke up, ate, worked, went to lectures, came home, stared at his phone, ate, watched old black and white movies, studied, and went to bed.
Each day he waited for Kurt to contact him.
Each day he tried to work up the courage to contact Kurt.
A long time ago, a lifetime ago, Kurt had written onto his calendar when he was on study leave. The day after was circled and bared the words KURT VISITING WITH MASSIVE WORK LOAD (yes, that's a euphemism Blaine).
The day he changed the calendar month, he stared at the other boy's handwriting for hours. That night, Blaine didn't sleep. He stayed up making coffee and writing a list of the things he wanted, just like he had told Kurt all those months ago bt had never actually done.
Things I need.
1) graduate Yale.
2) Find a job
He heard Sebastian cluttering around in the kitchen, bashing loudly into pots and pans. Blaine stuck his head out of the door after hearing an almighty bang, and saw his flatmate lying on the floor, passed out and drunk.
3) Move out
Blaine rubbed his eyes and went out to help his hopefully still alive friend. After setting the drunkard down on his own bed (with some difficulty as Sebastian weighed a ton), he put the page aside and went to stare at the calendar some more.
It was at least an hour later, after much internal fighting, that he brought the page back and scrawled
Kurt was walking out of his last lecture before study leave when his phone rang. He answered it without glancing at the caller ID, expecting his flatmate to say she'd locked herself out again. He really knew how to pick his friends.
"Chels, I swear-"
"Hi. Hi Blaine."
"I hope you won't be mad at me for calling."
"No, of course not." Never. Never at you.
"It's just I've got my first exam next week, and I knew you start your study leave today, so I figured it would be an okay time to catch up."
"Sure, yes, that's absolutely fine." Pull yourself together Hummel, don't sound so eager. "I'm just starting to walk home now so I've got loads of time."
The conversation flowed surprisingly well for ex-lovers who hadn't spoken in five months, one week and three days. Not that Kurt was counting. They kept it strictly friendly, asking about family and work and oh isn't that interesting because...
Neither asked about the others' love life. They didn't discuss old friends, and they didn't talk about Ohio or the past.
After a good hour and a half, Kurt finally said, "I've missed this. I've missed my best friend."
And Blaine couldn't find the cruelty to reply, "I know."
Instead he said, "I've missed you too."
One night a few weeks after their phone call, Blaine was woken up by an unstoppable banging. Bleary eyed, he stared at his alarm clock which read 1:37.
He stumbled to the door, flipping on various lights, and pulled it open.
He had to blink.
"I'm so sorry to have woken you up Blaine, but I just need to- I need-"
A tear stained, red faced, puffy eyed Kurt Hummel was outside of his door. Fresh tears were swimming in his eyes, and Blaine just looked at him, baffled. His sleep ridden brain couldn't seem to comprehend the man in front of him.
Fortunately, manners took over.
"Kurt, come in."
A cup of coffee (for the both of them) later, Kurt was ready to talk.
"I went on a date." He blurted out. The words stabbed Blaine, and his stomach plummeted.
"It was horrific. The food was terrible, the place was tacky, and I just kept comparing everything to you. He wasn't you, Blaine. And I realised, no-one ever will be you. I got a taxi here as soon as I got away because I needed to be here. I realised it tonight, and I can't stand this anymore. I just need- I want-"
More tears came streaming down pale cheeks, and Blaine shushed and calmed and tried everything he could. Although Kurt's words made Blaine feel lighter than air, his sole focus was to comfort the broken boy in front of him.
"Kurt, its fine. I'm here. I'm here."
Later, they could move to Blaine's bed and sleep entwined. Later, Blaine would marvel at being lucky enough to have the boy he'd let go return to him a full five months of missing him every single day. Later, Blaine would remember to lock the front door.
But for now, he was content to sit on the settee, wrapped around Kurt and whispering in his ear. At some point, Kurt's sobs and staggered breaths calmed, but all Blaine noticed was that he was whole once again.
"No Blaine! No you aren't allowed to do this!"
Okay, so maybe he shouldn't have started off with, "Kurt, love of my life." But this was not how things were supposed to go!
I bet it was the watch. I knew I should have gone with a ring!
"Blaine, get off the floor. People are looking."
"Why- what- did you just say no?"
This was not happening.
"Blaine if you would just wait..."
"No! Tell me now, why are you saying no to me?"
Kurt sighed and rolled his eyes dramatically, frowning at his boyfriend who was currently baring his soul to not only Kurt, but the entire eavesdropping restaurant.
"Because, you idiot," Kurt took his hand out of Blaine's to reach deep into his trouser pocket. He pulled out a silver watch. It was simple, understated, and engraved.
He held it out to Blaine almost carelessly, and Blaine's heart leapt to his throat.
"I wanted to propose first." Kurt's voice was barely a whisper, but the table next to them 'aww-ed' rather loudly.
"You- you what?"
Kurt sighed again and pulled his boyfriend to his feet. Then he pushed back his own chair and got on one knee.
"You jumped the gun Anderson. I was the one who booked this table for our anniversary. Therefore I should be the one proposing."
Kurt laughed at himself, but Blaine could tell his voice was thick.
"Blaine Anderson, I'm not going to give you a horrible cheesy speech, because you do those perfectly. I'm not promising to stop arguing with you, or to stop stealing the covers in the night. But we've been together for eight years, and just like you know I want to pick out my own wedding ring, I know you wouldn't ever wear jewellery. So, you kind of stole my thunder here, but Blaine, will you marry me?"
"It's sort of obvious what my answer is going to be."
Kurt shrugged, but a huge grin played across his face. "Humour me."
"Fine. Yes. Yes, I'll marry you." Blaine laughed, holding out his wrist so Kurt could clip the watch on.
"Now you do me." Kurt winked, standing up and letting Blaine put on a charcoal black watch on his wrist that contrasted beautifully with his pale skin tone.
As the restaurant around them burst into applause, the couple couldn't help but laugh giddily and share a slow kiss for the audience.
And later, after their meal and after they had rushed back to their New York apartment, they shared another knowing look as they found both their watches had the same inscription.
Because although sometimes Kurt and Blaine could fight over the simplest misunderstandings, they got through everything together. They could scream and yell, but they always found themselves back with each other, days, weeks or months later. Somehow, Kurt and Blaine ended up on the same page when it mattered.
I just can't ever not see them getting married! I couldn't end it without them proposing to balance out the heart break-ish parts.