AN: Hello again :) I know I haven't post in a while here and I'm truly sorry about that. Anyway, I hope this kinda makes up for everything.
I've been struggling a lot whether or not leave it as a one shot or do it a multi-chapter and my lovely beta readers (thank you girls) already told me their opinion. So I'm doing it.
Once again (I will never get tired of this), sorry for my lame-ass english.
Oh! And I want to thank mostly two songs for this: Breakeven-The Script, and another one in spanish that I'm not sure if you'd get it but it's Parte de este juego-Gianmarco
Ok, enjoy? I'm not sure if that's what I want you to do but...you know...uh...read it.
Logan Wright couldn't sleep. How could he? So much stress at work, so many troubles with his father, so much loneliness.
Oh, the fucking loneliness.
He never let anyone get into his life after he graduated. He just needed contact once in a while; casual flings, that's it. Why more? Besides, with all the hours he spent at work he didn't have time to pretend that he cared about anyone else. He rubbed his eyes and began to check his e-mails on his Blackberry: Work mail, work mail, work mail, scrolled down, work mail, spam, work mail, Katherine's hundredth invitation to The Hamptons (ugh, he was getting sick of Katherine, why did his father have to get rid of Michelle?), work, work, spam, and…
He frowned and clicked on the bold words that read Dalton Academy. Subject: Former Student's Reunion. The mail opened and started to read it. 'Dear Dalton family: It's a pleasure to greet you all…blah blah…lunch on Saturday the 16th to join us…blah blah blah…hope to see you…blah blah blah…please send a reply with your name on it to confirm your assistance. Write your name down on the year you graduated and send it back to…blah blah…blah…
So he was curious. He scrolled down until he found his year and started reading some familiar names. Saturday the 16th was…well, was today actually. Whatever –he wasn't going anyway, he was too tired.
"Jules?" he frowned at the name. That was a surprise, Julian swore on the last day of school that he will never set a foot on Dalton again.
Among other things.
He touched his lips softly, like he was feeling everything all over again –like he was feeling him all over again. His kisses, his soft moans, the flirty looks they'd shared, the endless nights talking that led to a sleepy, grumpy Julian the next morning blaming Logan for being such a girl who loved to talk about his feelings…
He remembered their first time together. He remembered that afternoon by the fireplace when Julian slipped an 'I love you' and he couldn't help but to say it back. That warmth on his eyes, on his smile, on his long fingers caressing his nude back every night… He remembered the constant teasing which always ended up on bed or in the nearest closet. The way they hugged, like they were afraid of letting go; the way how he felt chills every time Julian's breath met his skin; how he always bit his lip to turn Logan on; how he actually looked like a cat when he stretched every morning and Logan took him by the waist and kissed the back of his neck slowly, as he knew he liked it.
And then he remembered how fucked up everything ended.
13:00 hrs… he checked his watch. He had nine hours to take a shower, change, drive to Westerville and think all the way through what he would say to Julian when he saw him again. For the first time in ten years.
Even the grass looked the same. Nothing had changed: Dalton still had that majestic sight Logan always appreciated. He went down the stony stairs towards the Main Garden and looked around. Where is he? He checked his watch again, 01:05. Yes, of course, Julian was never on time. He loved to make people wait for him (it was one of the greatest pleasures of being a superstar) when it wasn't anything work-related. How many times did they argue about that? Logan Wright, the guy who was always on time, punctual, irritated when people made him wait, sighed and walked through the tables trying to find someone he knew and not look awkward in a corner waiting for Julian.
But, suddenly, he saw him.
Thirty feet away for him, standing all alone looking bored and sleepy, was the actor. Logan felt a knot in his stomach at his sight: he hadn't change a bit. Well, sure, he was ten years older but, occasionally, Logan saw him on a magazine or in the news and smiled. He didn't care about what he was talking or with whom he had been spotted on. He didn't even care about all the gossips and news towards him. He just looked at him and began to remember.
Began to wonder…
…How would their lives have been if things hadn't ended that night.
The blond took a deep breath and walked towards the actor, every step closer was more excited than the one before. He tried not to smile broadly, not to scare the guy in front of him, but when brown eyes met green, all Logan saw was utter horror. Julian's body tensed, his eyes opened widely and almost choked with his own saliva.
What the hell? Logan? What is he doing here? The blond was closer. His eyes were set on him, like a target. No, he didn't confirm the fucking invitation. You can't come without confirming the invitation! Argh! Jesus fuck, he always does whatever he wants to do!
"Jules" he smiled softly hiding his excitement. If he hadn't run yet maybe it was because they could still have a chance.
"It's Julian" he snapped out, pressing his lips. Logan was amused, he seemed so…so…so scared, so upset, so in the urge to vanish…
But, at the same time, in the urge to jump to his arms.
"What are you doing here? You didn't respond the mail…you're not supposed to be here"
Logan frowned slightly and tilted his head "If I'd answered… would that make a difference?"
"I wouldn't have come"
Words hurt but Julian's look broke his heart. Oh…He was being serious. His eyes were begging him to go. Again.
"So…" the taller guy lowered his head. He couldn't keep watching Julian's hateful eyes. They were cruel, like trying to hurt him, to make him cry (he wouldn't cry, he never cries). After all those years, his eyes kept that same look: hate and pain mixed in a pair of big brown eyes that were full of love at one time. What had he done? He swore one night when they were watching movies in the common room and Julian fall asleep on his chest that he would never hurt him. Never.
He was such a failure. He couldn't keep his word. Not even to the person he had loved the most.
Loves the most.
But that was it.
He hated him.
He cleared his throat "…how have you been?"
Julian opened his mouth to snap an answer but he couldn't make it. An excited and hurried voice came from a side.
"I know, I know. You wanted vodka but I refuse to put up with you being drunk all day" the one talking handed Julian a hot beverage but the two guys kept staring at each other "Here. Coffee. Please be awake"
Logan blinked and looked to the person between the two of them.
And he was surprised.
He was truly surprised.
A woman, almost same size as Julian, was smiling widely looking at the actor. Julian lowered his head to stare deeply at the cup of coffee and mouthed a 'thank you'. The woman looked at Logan and her smile grew even more. White, pearly teeth appeared while intense green eyes lighted her face.
"Julian!" she exclaimed in content "Hi!" she stretched her hand to Logan which he contemplated hesitantly "Oh my God, Jul! Would you please introduce us?"
The actor almost choked with the coffee and decided to leave it on a close table before talking "Yeah…" he cleared his throat loudly "Marianne, this is Logan Wright" the woman's smile was getting bigger, her hand still extended with pride "Logan, this is Marianne. My wife"
Logan shook his head and smiled politely at Marianne shaking her hand and stopping to see the wedding ring she was wearing. He raised his glance and met Julian's icy look. He frowned in concern. What's going on? How could he be married to…to…to Marianne? What the hell? She looks so arrogant and dominant, and too fucking excited for every-fucking-thing!
"So, Logan, are you and my husband friends from school?"
And she hadn't heard of him? Did Julian have never talk to her about him? They were boyfriends! Okay, maybe you don't want to talk about that with your wife but they were best friends before that! They were…they –What was going on?
"No" Julian instantly answered. Marianne's smile became uncomfortable "I mean…we were on the same year but…"
"Oh!" the woman started to play with her long, blonde hair tied up on a pony tail "Okay, I see"
Jules, what are you doing?
Why are you acting like this?
His green eyes darkened with sadness but he couldn't help to keep staring at Julian.
Come on Logan, just go. Go, please go.
"Oh! Now I remember!" Oh my God woman, shut up "You're that Senator's son, Logan Wright" Marianne is just like Sherlock freaking Holmes "yes, of course!" The fake huge smile again "Oh, here's something funny" Logan felt another knot in his stomach when he saw Marianne's hands grabbing Julian's arm "Logan is also the name of our son!"
The brunet swallowed and raised an eyebrow, daring him. Hating him. Come on Wright, go away. He was trying to hurt him. He only wanted to hurt him and Marianne had helped him; and he loved Marianne, and he loved Logan, and he hated Logan. Just to provoke him pain, he only wanted that.
And he succeeded.
Logan furrowed his brow and nodded like an idiot. He should probably go. This wasn't a good idea at all. They were hopeless. It was hopeless, why bother? He was married with stupid Marianne and had a family now.
The woman laughed "I think I have a picture with me" She started to look in her purse while both guys were exchanging looks: one hating, one aching. "Yes! Oh, he is such a sweetheart!" he handed the picture to Logan who took it after a long consideration.
Brown oak hair like his father, thin pink lips giving the camera a Cheshire cat smile.
And eyes…the eyes of his mother. Intense green eyes, huge, curious, familiar…
Because he had the same green color as…
"Oh. He's…" What could he say? Logan gave the picture back to the proud mom and smiled sadly at the couple. Marianne didn't notice it, but Julian did and clenched his jaw "Congratulations"
"So…Logan…" she smirked, Logan felt he had seen that same smirk in someone else "any kid of your own?" her eyes got bigger. How great were her ideas? "We could set a play date or something!"
Logan sighed and shook his head "No. No kids, just me" he smiled softly.
Marianne bit her lip embarrassed and whispered a 'sorry' with an apologetic look.
"Just you, huh?" Julian raised his eyebrow and smirked proudly "No other guy in your life?"
His wife elbowed him and smiled –once again –at the other blond.
"One" he answered faking a smile while talking "He's married though"
Julian swallowed slowly. Don't do this, Lo. Please don't open your mouth and do this to me again. I can't…I'm not falling for you again. I'm not hurting myself again. Finally, the brown eyes showed sorrow. His heart was beating faster, just like that time ten years ago.
"Logan!" Marianne laughed amused "If I've learned something about the Hollywood life is that it doesn't matter!"
Two pair of eyes set on her "Marianne, you're talking nonsense" Julian hurried to speak "Come on. Let's go" he grabbed her arm and tried to walk away but his wife refused.
"Come on, Jul" Jul…Jul is not even a real nickname! "I mean, I'm lucky to have someone like you but we both know that sometimes people marry the wrong person" Logan laughed -yes Marianne, you are so right about that- and looked at her intensely "Remember Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston? Of course, they look nice and they cared about the other but then Angie came and BAM!" she clapped her hands so hard that made Julian jumped a little "They're still together after all this years"
Marianne got closer to Logan and gave him an authentic smile; her eyes were full of hope and romanticism "A wedding ring in the wrong finger is not a wedding ring" she winked.
Wise annoying little bitch Marianne. Logan smiled at her and eyed Julian for a couple of seconds. He looked scared.
"I don't think he'll like it though"
The Main Garden was getting crowded, tables continued to get filled with people. The noise in Dalton was getting unbearable; they'd hired a DJ that kept playing awful loudly music but the three of them seemed to be immunes to it.
"Come on Marianne" he glared at Logan "We're leaving"
"But we just get here Julian!" the woman frowned extremely upset with her husband "Besides, I was talking to Logan over here" that annoyingly huge smile again.
"I don't feel well. Maybe is the jet-lag. Besides, Logan is all alone with the nanny in the cabin and I promised him we'll go to the zoo later"
His wife sighed and rolled her eyes at the other blond "What Logan wants, Logan gets" she kissed the taller guy on the cheek "You have no idea how much Julian loves him. He spoils him too much I'm afraid" a final smile before she walked away holding her husband's arm tightly. Logan saw them leave and it hurt. It really hurt, but he couldn't help to smirk.
Maybe he needed to stick around for a while.
AN: So? Yeah? No? What do you guys think? Reviews would be lovely. I'm always happy to know what do you think. (Oh, and thank you for reading it. I love you all)