"I need to see Komui. We have an urgent message for your chief." A little man in a suit passed through the Order with Lenalee as his guide. She showed him into the cluttered office and there on the desk sleeping was Chief Komui. Lenalee rolled her eyes and said that he could just yell at her brother for falling asleep. Then she left leaving whatever matter the higher ups had to he brother.
The person cleared his throat loudly and Komui jolted awake. He blinked a few times then stood, immediately bowing then fixing his glasses and hat he greeted the man. He looked at the man closer and noticed the sad look on his face.
"Chief Komui, please sit. We have some information on the exorcist Allen Walker." Komui's eyes widened. They never had personal visits from the higher ups unless something had happened. He frowned and sat. This was going to be a long talk.
Mean while Lavi and Kanda were in the cafeteria for an early lunch. Lavi had been really hungry lately and he needed food before he was going to pass out. Kanda chuckled at the show Lavi made for him while they passed through the area. He had so much food in his arms that every time he turned or looked back to see if Kanda was following him he almost spilled it all.
They were about halfway through lunch when the intercom rang out. "There is a pressing matter. *sniffle* I need to see, Lenalee, Kanda, Lavi, Krory, and Miranda in my office." Kanda looked at Lavi and he nodded. They both got up and walked towards the chief's office.
When they arrived they saw the man had left. Everybody had gotten there besides Miranda, who was always slightly late. Lavi smiled at Lenalee and Krory then sat down in the chairs next them. Kanda followed in suit. Then Miranda came bursting in through the doors.
"I'm so sorry I'm late. I can't believe I made you wait so long! I shouldn't be part of this fine organization. I don't deserve to be an innocence user. Especially if I'm late to every meeting that I'm called to." After the hectic time master was calmed down Komui cleared his throat.
"I know none of you probably know why you've been called here today. But something has happened to our Allen Walker. He was found dead yesterday at the gravesite of a man named Mana Walker." Lavi gasped, Miranda and Lenalee began to cry, and Krory just gaped. "His wrists were slit. He was not murdered, but committed suicide. His funeral will be held tomorrow-"
"But that's Allen's birthday!"Lavi exclaimed.
"That's precisely the reason we are having it tomorrow. To celebrate his life and then to mourn his passing. To show that we will miss him and that he was a dear friend to all of us. He died, for whatever reason, knowing that he was surrounded by people he loved." By then Komui even had some tears running down his cheeks. "That was all we needed to talk about, you are free to leave."
Everyone put on their brave faces and left without a tear in their eyes. Lenalee put up the happy façade of her usual self and Krory tried to be as normal as possible but ended up being clumsier than before. Miranda ran into someone and burst into tears. She screamed out and 'I'm sorry' then ran to her room. Lavi just wandered around the order with a dull lifeless look on his face. Kanda followed the boy afraid that something might happen if he didn't.
Hours of wandering around and Lavi ended up on the library. His favorite place in the world. Kanda noticed him look up for a second then move on to a couch in the lounge. He sat down and put his head in his hands. He looked so depressed.
"The last thing he said to me was that I was hurting him." Lavi whispered to no one really.
Kanda looked up, "What?" Why would Allen say that he was being hurt by Lavi?
"He said that he couldn't take it anymore. All his pretending and acting like everything was okay. He told me that I was hurting him for not noticing how much he actually cared for me. Then he said that seeing you with me constantly is what pained him the most. Then he ran off and that's the last thing he ever said to me." Kanda looked at Lavi in shock. The boy had had feelings for Lavi. He hadn't even noticed, but then came to the same realization as Lavi had. He was always kinder to the redhead and did more things for him than he did for anyone else in the Order.
Tears welled in Lavi's eyes, "I couldn't say anything that would bring him back. But what would I have to say to him. All I could have told him was that I only loved him as a friend." Lavi's hands clenched in his hair like he was trying to hold onto his sanity. "I couldn't do anything for the person that had been there the most for me in the past few years. His face, the look he had will always be burned into my mind. That angry, sad look that made me want to hug him. He looked into my eyes and they said more than any words ever would. The tear filled blue eyes and they said everything that he couldn't." Lavi just broken down. He started shaking with the sobs that came from his body. He hurt because of this. He blamed himself for the pain he made Allen go through. He blamed himself for the death of his best friend. If he had just known, if he had been there for Allen like he had been there for Lavi then none of this might of happened.
Lavi was pulled into Kanda's arms and he buried his face into Kanda's chest. The embrace was comforting but his body was still wracked with sobs. All he could was that he had done this to his best friend. He will never be able to tell Allen that he did care about him. He would never be able to see his smiling face again.
Lenalee, Miranda and Krory stood at the entrance of the library wondering if they should go in. The long haired girl was the first to decide. She walked in sitting on the other side of Lavi and put comforting hand on his back. The other followed her example and Krory sat on a chair next to them and Miranda grabbed on and brought it towards the couch. There they sat. There they cried. There, they were here for each other.
The next day was the funeral. Lavi got out of his bed and tried to act like this didn't bother him as much as it did. He was a more than broken right now. His friend was dead and he blamed himself for everything Allen had to go through. He was his first true best friend. He never hid anything from him. Kanda noticed the lag in anything Lavi did before the funeral. He was in pain and the swordsman could deal with that for a while.
They both walked slowly through the halls. Lavi clung to Kanda's arm as though if he let go he would fall. And the redhead probably would. He didn't want to see the lifeless body of his friend be lying there in front of him. He didn't want to go but his feet kept carrying him towards the great hall in the middle of the Order.
The hall was almost full by the time they got there. Each of them were given a small white lilies and they took their seats near the front. Komui got up on the podium and looked out into the crowd. Almost everyone had come. Even some of the people who had hardly known the boy. He was saddened by seeing all the people who lost a great friend in Allen.
"We have all gathered here today to mourn the life and passing of a great friend. He saved us time and time again, not asking for a thanks or even a reward. As is the job of an exorcist. He threw himself into danger to help those who needed it. His friends were so very faithful. My little sister, Lenalee, was constantly talking about how brave and thoughtful Allen was. How he always went out of his way to save anyone and everyone who needed his help. And without fail he would. Whether or not the mission was to get the innocence away from the Akumas he would first get everyone away from the danger and destroy them. He was a true hero of the people, we all loved him dearly, and he will be missed terribly." Komui's speech ended and he nodded to Lenalee, who was sitting in the first row. She got up and made her speech about Allen. Then did the same for Miranda. Miranda did so for Krory and Krory for Kanda.
Lavi did not think that Kanda would make a speech for Allen. "Allen was a wonderful person," Kanda started in his baritone voice. "He lived as though he wouldn't live another day, every day. This, for the most part, was a huge possibility. Now I'm not going to say that we were on the best speaking terms but we helped each other out every chance we got. We weren't friends but we weren't enemies and that seemed okay with the both of us. It's going to be tough not seeing him around. Not having our usual fights. It will be the hardest for those who took the time to actually know Allen. He listened intently when you told him anything. He probably even knew my likes and dislikes. I may not have been the best at listening to him but that's may be how it goes. The one person who was probably the best of us, the one who would give everything to keep the ones he loved safe, is now gone. We will miss you moyashi, so very, very much." Kanda walked down from the podium, his shoulders were slightly slumped and he looked less proud than he was usually. He nodded at Lavi and the boy stood slowly. Walking towards the podium to give a speech on his friend.
"There really is no way to describe Allen. For the most part, he is kind, generous and would give his life for anyone, friend or foe. But he was so much more than that. He was my friend. My first real best friend. The one who listened to all my thoughts and regrets. The one who made me think of things in a different way, not so black and white. He taught me that it was okay to cry for the things we've lost and for those who have died." Lavi began to cry himself, he gave a sad smile. "That's probably why I'm crying right now." He wiped the tears away but they kept falling. "He was there for me during a stage of my life that I had never experienced. He gave me everything I needed and he is irreplaceable. I still regret the day he ran off and I didn't keep chasing him. I still see that pained face he had before he ran off into the distance. My life will never be the same without him." He covered his face in sorrow as a few sobs wracked his body. He calmed down and wiped away the tears. Kanda was about to get up and stand by him as support but Lavi shook his head; he needed to this on his own. The disgruntled swordsman sat back in his chair.
"Even though he taught me that it was okay to be sad when someone died you were also supposed to find a way to be happy after their gone. I think he believed there was God or something that would take him to a place of paradise, which gives me comfort that he is happy right now. He was my friend, my comforter, and my own personal savior. It will be hard to go on without him, I miss him, forever." Lavi was trembling by the time he had gotten back to his seat and Kanda put an arm around him.
They began to place the lilies on a table, with the boy's picture on it, next to Allen's open casket. It went in the same order as before. Each said their own little piece to Allen and placed a lily on the table. Lavi walked up to Allen and more tears filled his eyes. That face, the face he remembered with that big grin on it, was now motionless and pale. They fell off his cheeks and onto the young ones. He reached down and wiped them off gently, "I will miss you, Allen. I'm so sorry I did this to you." He walked away, back to his room. Kanda followed, as always.
Lavi got into his room and threw a chair at the wall watching it splinter. He fell to his knees he was so angry and sad at the same time. The tears fell when he didn't want them to. He felt like it was all his fault over and over he blamed himself. He was sobbing again. It's all my fault. Why did I let this happen to him? Isn't there something I could have done for him? He's my best friend I never wanted to lose him. Not like this. Not ever. How could this have happened? I should have done something, said something to actually make him stay. Kanda interrupted his thoughts by wrapping an arm around him and just letting him cry.
"Sshh love, it's all right. Everything will be okay, I know it. I understand that he was your best friend and that you will miss him. That's what happens when you lose someone you love. I will be here for you every time you feel sad or any time you feel as though your world is falling apart because he's not here. I will be your shoulder to cry on from now on. I will be here when you break down. I will do this because of my love for you. Lavi, I will love you forever and always." Lavi looked at Kanda in wonder. He could always say the best things at the right time.
"And I will do my best to love you without regret. I will do my best not to blame myself so much for his death. I will come to you when I need help the most. Because I love you and will always need that shoulder to cry on?"
And that was it. They were vowing to each other that they will never leave the other. That there love made them strong. They would always remember Allen as their closest friend. He would be cried for many times over the years by Lavi. Lavi would try to not blame himself and regret so much, even though it was hard. Kanda kept him strong through many of those times in his life that his world did fall apart
All these times made them stronger. They depended on each other like they were the air they breathed. No one would be able to break through the bond they created, and that's how it was for the rest of their days.
A/N: how do you like the ending to the story? please review and tell me! i also wanted to thank all reviews i got previously. you guys are inspiring :) thank you so much for reading!