Disclaimer: I don't own anything in this fic. No, seriously. Not even the original idea. I just saw it in a TV commercial and thought it was too hilarious and that it would b cool to use it here. Well, the last part was mah idea, tho. The characters belong to Marvel.
All the young X-Men were gathered in the rec-room. Scott and Jean were huddled together on the couch making out; Rogue, Kurt, Evan and Kitty were watching a horror movie, Kitty being so scared she was hugging the nearest person who happened to be Kurt who was grinning like an idiot, feeling something like a mixture of amusement and satisfaction. Amusement for what he was watching in the movie and satisfaction for the fact Kitty was clinging on him (Happy, Kurtty fans? That will be the most Kurtty I'll be writing EVER.), and the new mutants were doing who knows what behind the couch (judging by the bucket, the slimy liquids and the fact it was exactly the same couch Scott and Jean were making out in, well, make your guesses).
Suddenly, the alarm began to sound. *We have an intruder.* they heard the professor in their minds. *Hurry, head to the lobby*. Everyone rushed to the lobby and were surprised to find Mystique standing in the center of the room like if she owned the place. Wolverine, Storm, Beast and Xavier were there already. Logan was about to launch himself at her but the professor stopped him. He wheeled further and approached Mystique. After being missing for almost seven months, why did she decide to appear just now? And what did she want? "May I ask, Mystique, what's your business here in my mansion?" asked Charles, determined to get to the bottom of this.
"I have an important announcement." said Mystique. It wasn't until then that Charles noticed she was holding a black portfolio. She opened it and took out some papers… Adoption papers. She then looked at Rogue. "See this adoption papers? Rogue, I'm your mother." Rogue gasped in shock, but she wasn't finished yet. She pointed at Evan "And your mother," he gasped. She looked at Jean "and your mother," she just gave her a funny look. Then she pointed at Scott "and your mother," he just rolled his eyes. "and your mother," Ororo gasped. "and your mother," Logan growled.
In the end she revealed she had actually adopted each and every one of the X-Men, including Professor X and excluding Kurt because since he was her biological son already, there was no need. Even all of the members of the Brotherhood and Acolytes were adopted by her. And in the end everyone was forced to give her presents or to take her out for mother's day.
"The end!" Said Moira, closing the book.
"But I don't get it." Said Jamie, who was in bed because a small bug he caught a couple days ago. "How could Mystique adopt everyone? In the first place, not all of the X-Men, Brotherhood and Acolytes are orphans. And how could she adopt the professor if he is older than her!"
"Actually, kid," Said Moira with a smile on her face "her power makes her look way younger than she really is. With all we know, she could be old enough to be his grandmother."
"Hmmm. Makes sense, I think." Said Jamie.
Moira looked at the clock in the bedside table. It said 9:30 "Oh, just look at the hour. Well child, it's time for you to go to sleep!" said Moira patting his head.
"But I'm not tired!"
"Nuh-huh. No 'buts', kiddo. Now time to go to sleep."
"NO! I don't have to listen to you! You are not my mother!" Protested Jamie.
"Well… Actually" Said Moira. Then her skin began turning blue and her hair red. Then Mystique (like… duh) took out an adoption certificate from her pocket.
"!" And with that, Jamie fainted.
A/N: Did you like it? It was kind of confusing, wasn't it? Yeah, I gotta work on that.
I'm not gonna tell u to review this 'cuz since it was just a one-shot I don't need the motivation.
Oh, and congratulations to all mothers over there! And if your children aren't spoiling you enough, tell them that if they don't start doing it soon, I'll tell the Menace to go after them and to eat their shoes and pull their feet while they're sleeping. Muahahaha.