While I was watching NCIS to kill time before Criminal Minds came on a little devil popped up on my shoulder and whispered Tony and Reid would be such an adorable couple but a little angel disagreed and said Morgan would rip Tony to shreds so I decided to play peacemaker and combine the two.

This will be Morgan/Reid, don't worry! And Prentiss is still alive because I prefer her to Seaver.

Also, dedicated to my love Audy for enthusiastically agreeing with my strange mind. I own nothing unfortunately.

Chapter 1

It's a slow day in the BAU- as slow as possible for a federal bureau component, anyways. There are no major emergencies sending agents out immediately, no paperwork in danger of being overdue, no pieces of stubborn technology breaking down. Office doors are open, welcoming the serenity and letting people know their bosses are in a rare good mood. The bullpen is filled with people chatting amicably and soft scratching as relaxed hands complete forms with ease.

"Got a case."

A chorus of sighs greet JJ's announcement. Some are reluctant, not willing to give up a break just yet, and others are happy, ready to have something to do.

Morgan and Garcia are the first to get up. Garcia ruffles Reid's hair as she walks by, while Morgan opts to pull the thick book from the genius's hands, forcing him to come along. Prentiss signs one last paper and drops it on top of the stack of finished forms, grimacing at the rest that she has yet to look at, but walks to the briefing room anyways. Morgan ducks into his chief's office. Hotch and Rossi are going over an old case and are all too happy to drop it and meet up with the rest of the team at the round table.

"What do you have for us JJ?" Hotch asks as he opens up his folder.

"Well," she starts, standing in front of the group, "We've been asked by Director Vance at NCIS to help a team of investigators catch a killer."

"Wait, if a federal group is already on the case, why are we being called in?" Prentiss asks.

"They think the killer is a civilian who has been targeting Naval officers. They think he may have a partner who's currently in the Navy. Jurisdiction is a little murky and they need help trying to catch this guy." JJ answers, flipping through her file.

Prentiss nods her head in understanding. Morgan asks the next big question on everyone's mind. "So what have the killings been like?"

"Four people killed in the last two months, all men in their late twenties and early thirties. All stabbed in stomach and groin thirteen times, and the bodies have been dumped in alleys next to popular restaurants and bars near the base."

"Thirteen? Unlucky number," Morgan mumbles.

"Actually no number can be 'unlucky'." Reid pipes up. "Thirteen is really only considered unlucky because twelve in supposedly number of completeness, due to the twelve tribes of Israel, twelve Apostles, twelve Gods of Olympia. There are also twelve hands on a clock and twelve months in a year. Thirteen is seen as surpassing this completeness, making it irregular and strange. There's also Friday the Thirteenth. And that myth began when King Phillip ordered the death of the Knights Templar because-"

"Okay, okay. Right," Morgan holds his hands up defensively, "I forgot. Luck doesn't exist."

"Well, that's not necessarily true," Reid begins again, but Hotch jumps in while the young man takes a deep breath.

"We'll drive. Morgan, you take Reid and Prentiss. Rossi and JJ, you'll come with me. Garcia, you're on standby."

"Yes sir!" Garcia stands and salutes. She pats Morgan's shoulder, rumples Reid's short hair once more, and gives the rest of the team a smile and 'good luck!' before returning to her lair.

The group is quick to get up and gather their overnight bags from their desks. Hotch, Rossi, and JJ disappear into Hotch's office, still talking about the case. Morgan and Prentiss are ready to go in five minutes. Prentiss heads down to sign out a couple SUVs while Morgan grabs Reid.

"Reid, you ready to go?" he asks as he approaches the cluttered desk. Reid is bent double, trying to get something from the floor under his desk while remaining perched on his chair.

"Ah! Just a moment," Reid sits back up, narrowly avoiding hitting his head on the table edge. His face is flushed with excess blood, and he has a triumphant smile that makes Morgan grin automatically. The darker man's stomach tightens uncomfortably for a second, but relaxes when the other man looks away. "The spring from my pen fell out while I was replacing the ink," he explains.

"Right kid," Morgan shakes his head, still smiling. "Ready to go?"

Reid grabs his duffel bag of clothes, and slips on his 'bag of wonders', as Garcia calls it, and nods. He barely even makes a face when Derek puts a guiding hand on his back. He's glad Morgan doesn't ask him about the flush still reddening his face.

By the time they make it down to the garage the rest of the team are all waiting. They decide shortly on the best way to get to the NCIS offices, and climb in for the short drive.

It's an easy, comfortable ride. Morgan drives with Prentiss beside him, occasionally telling him facts from the file. Every time he looks in the rearview mirror he sees his little genius reading with a stack of books piled next to his folded legs. Reid only looks up once, and offers a shy smile, but keeps reading anyways. They reach the office building and Reid had already read through all four books.

All it takes is a simple flash of badges and a few dropped names before all seven agents pile into an elevator together. Morgan and Reid are a bit twitchy through the ride and step off the death machine quickly and gratefully. Hotch steps forward, looking around the buzzing room for an authority figure.

"BAU Unit Chief Hotchner?" A gray-haired man emerges from swarm of people. Hotch nods and the men shake hands. "I'm Special Agent Gibbs. I'm leading the Thirteen case."

"Nice to meet you. This is Agent David Rossi, Agent Derek Morgan, Agent Jennifer Jareau, Agent Emily Prentiss and Doctor Spencer Reid." Gibbs shakes each hand respectively and doesn't comment when Reid waves awkwardly.

Two more men and a woman join Gibbs. "This is my team. Agent Tony DiNozzo, Agent Timothy McGee, and Agent Ziva David."

McGee waves distractedly, still looking through a file of his own, Ziva nods her head curtly and Tony introduces himself with a smile. He shakes hands with Hotch and Rossi first. Morgan notices when he shakes his own hand, that DiNozzo squeezes just a bit harder than necessary. The Italian man gives a charming smile to JJ and Prentiss, who return it with friendly, yet guarded, smiles of their own. Spencer raises his hand to wave again, but before he can bring it back down, Tony slaps it with a chuckle.

Morgan is the only who notices the impromptu high-five. He's also the only one who sees Spencer stare at his hand with a confused look. But when he wipes his hands on his slacks, Derek turns his attention back to Gibbs, who is talking with Hotch.

"If it's alright, I'd like to send Agent Morgan and Reid to the latest dump site." Hotch politely requests.

"DiNozzo!" The handsome man stands from his cluttered desk, with a 'yeah Boss'. "Take Morgan and Reid to Mi Bella."

"Sure thing Boss." Tony grabs a set of keys and swings them around his fingers, nodding his towards the elevator. Morgan walks after him first, Reid coming up behind him after a moment.

"Here we are."

Tony pulls up to a well kept brick building, half a mile from the Navy base. Derek slides out of the passenger seat with a frown. He hates riding shotgun. Reid stumbles out of the backseat, quickly righting himself and clearing his throat when Tony gives him a little smirk of amusement.

Morgan makes his way next to them, looking at the Italian restaurant. "Where was the body found?" he asks. Tony points to a small alley to the left of the entrance. Remnants of police tape hang limply from the walls.

"Propped up next to the dumpster," he mentions.

"Ready to be thrown out with the garbage," Reid states surely.

The alley is cramped. The trio has to walk in a single file line to avoid hitting the grimy walls and step over piles of trash. Flies swim through the nearly tangible odor, buzzing in the agents' ears. They all instinctively start breathing through their mouths.

"The method of killing and dump site suggest that these men were considered beneath the unsub, and the unsub was confident enough to be confrontational. Their lives were expendable and not worth the trouble of proper disposal," Reid mutters. "Agent DiNozzo," Tony looks up at the young doctor, "Where were the men last seen?"

"Oh, uh," Tony stumbles, trying to dig the tidbits of information, "Kevin Winston, the man who was found here, was last seen by his neighbors leaving his house two nights ago."

"Ah!" Reid smiles, a familiar gleam in his eyes that Morgan recognizes as his 'just-had-a-major-break-in-the-case' gleam. "Our unsub is a woman. She was most likely sexually abused by a man in his late twenties or early thirties. Probably not a man she knew well, though."

"How do you know that?" Tony asks with a furrow in his brow.

"The stabbing is a metaphor for the pain of being forcibly penetrated." Morgan says. He pats Reid's back in congratulations as he walks by already pulling out his cell to call Hotch.

Tony looks at Reid, mouth twisted in thought. "That was fast."

Reid bobs his head. "We're, uh, good at what we do."

"Best, genius boy!" Morgan says over his shoulder, still walking away.

"Genius?" Tony looks at him confused.

"Oh, yeah, technically, I am a genius. Although, I don't believe you can proper quantify intelligence. I-I mean, just because I graduated high school at twelve, have three PhDs and an eidetic memory, and can read 20,000 words a minute, doesn't make me a genius. My brain just, uh, works faster and more efficiently than other people's." Spencer rushes out. He doesn't look Tony in the eye until he's done.

The other man quirks an eyebrow, and Reid feels his face heating up. Finally Tony smiles. "McGee will be so jealous."

"Uh, what?" Reid hunches his shoulders at the unexpected reaction.

Tony slings an arm over the shorter man's shoulders and starts leading him back to the car. Reid flinches, trying to shrink away but it doesn't work. "McGee. He'll hate having competition for being the smartest kid in the room."


"So, Reid, you will be my little weapon for the next however long you're here. We'll be partners: the Starsky and Hutch of pissing McGee off."

"Starsky and Hutch. Police partners from the 1975 television series. Four seasons, 93 episodes starring David Soul and Paul Michael Glaser as the title characters."

Tony hugs him tighter to his side. "Kid, you're an angel sent from heaven."

They reach the car. Derek gives Reid a questioning looking, glancing at the arm around him. Spencer ducks his head, feeling uneasy, but not comfortable enough to force the offending limb from his body.

"Hotch wants us back at the offices. We need to release the profile."

"Okay." Reid agrees quietly.

Tony releases his hold on the young genius. Reid rubs the spot where the other agent's hands had been and takes a side long glance at Derek who looks vaguely unhappy. It's difficult for Spencer to tell if Morgan is simply in his business mode, or if it's something else. Stiff legs slip a tense body into the passenger seat. He angles his large body toward the window, not acknowledging the other man next to him. It's something personal, Reid decides.

Alpha male tendencies.

"Our unsub is a woman, most likely white and in her mid to late twenties."

The BAU team is standing before a mixed group of police men, NCIS agents, and a few scattered journalists. Hotch has his hands clasped formally in front of him, JJ and Rossi standing on either side of him. Emily, Derek and Spencer wait off to the side, ready jump in with any ideas they have. Gibbs, Tony, Ziva, and McGee are sitting at the head of the conference table, asserting their presence in the case.

"She's attractive enough to lure men into going on dates, and to get the attention of a rapist," Reid announces.

"Her confidence in being able to overpower these men long enough to kill them may suggest that she was once a Navy officer. Her attacker was also probably in the Navy, which is why she targets these men," Morgan inputs.

"So what can we tell the public?" a journalist asks. Her pen is poised to jot down anything the agents say.

"Tell the man to be cautious when going out with a lady they've just met, but there is no immediate danger and they shouldn't feel threatened." Hotch's answer is profession and calm. He turns his back to the group as a cue that he's done talking.

The room is filled with sudden movement as people rise to go on with their day. The only people who remain are the BAU and NCIS teams. JJ leaves as well to give the official press release. Hotch, Reid, and Emily gather around the cork boards holding their evidence and theories, while the rest of the team sit with Tony and Ziva. Gibbs stands next to Rossi, quietly murmuring about the case. McGee rushes through the door, saying something about seeing Abby.

"So," Tony leans back in his chair to prop his feet on the table, "Where do we go from here?"

"We'll need to get a list of all the reported rape victims from the past year, and all of the Navy officers who have been accused of rape as well." Reid drops into a chair across from Tony, next to Derek.

Ziva shakes her head. "It'll be hard to find any men accused of rape. The higher ups in the Navy will have tried to keep the accusations quiet. Not very good press." Gibbs hums his agreement but doesn't comment.

Morgan pulls out his phone. "I'll call Garcia and get her to find what she can."

"Uh, Agent DiNozzo-"


Reid's words stumble at the interruption. "Oh, uh, Tonycan you tell me how to get to the morgue? I'd like to examine the bodies."

"I'll show you the way." Tony stands. Ziva has an odd smile Reid notes.

"Not your usual type, Tony," she says.

The man gives her a warning look, but smiles at Reid. "Come on kid."

Reid gets to his feet wearing a wary expression. He looks at his friends but no one seems to notices the exchange. Morgan is happily chatting away to Garcia, Emily is discussing the next move with Hotch while Rossi points out different things to Gibbs on the board.

Spencer follows Tony anyways.

They walk down the short hallway to the elevator. It dings in a second and they climb on, set to head down to the basement.

"So, are you originally from Quantico?" Tony asks, looking into Spencer's eyes intently.

Reid crosses his arm in front his chest, clutching his other arm out of sheer nervous habit. "No. I'm from Las Vegas."

"Oh, I love Vegas. Best city in America."

"Best for random muggings and catching a sexually transmitted disease," Reid snorts.

Tony twists his face into look of mock offense. Reid raises an eyebrow, but Tony only continues to stare until Spencer gives a little laugh. "You're from Vegas. Best city in America." Reid chokes a little, and he bites the inside of his cheek.

Luckily the elevator sounds and the doors slide open. Tony flashes him a smile and steps off. Reid follows, his nails biting into his arm.

"Ducky, I brought you a visitor."

The doctor looks up from the corpse he was working on. "Hello. Who are you m'boy?"

Reid lifts his hand in his practice greeting. "Doctor Spencer Reid from the Behavioral Analysis Unit. I was wondering if I could look at the bodies from the Thirteen case?"

"Ah, yes." Ducky looks around the room, trying to find something. "Mr. Palmer!" A thin man in round glasses pops his head out from the office across the room. "Pull the bodies in lockers thirteen, fourteen, and fifteen."

Reid gives an amused chuckle. "Heh. Clever. Putting the body in locker thirteen," he comments.

Ducky smiles as well. "You're the first to get it Dr. Reid."

"Kid's a genius, Ducky," Tony states without looking up from the body on the table. "Certified smarty-pants."

The examiner pauses, and eventually bobs his head. "How interesting."

"Here you are: all the other bodies." Jimmy hands Reid a pair of blue latex gloves.

Reid pokes and prods each body in succession. He notes the depth and location of each wound. The woman was obviously enraged when she was killing. Each man's genitals and stomach were maimed and minced, and probably very messy when they were first found. Now, however, the cuts are clean and dry. The skin furls up from the body, exposing slivers of innards.

"Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned," Reid says, wrinkling his nose at the poor deceased men.

Tony walks up beside him. "You have no idea."

Reid pulls off the dirty gloves and throws them into the haz-mat bin. "Thank you Dr., uh, Ducky." The doctor nods his head, too focused on the body in front of him to fully acknowledge the younger man. "We can go, if you'd like."

"Yeah, sure," Tony replies, already walking back to the elevator. They wait for the box to make its way down in comfortable silence before Tony turns abruptly towards Spencer. "Do you want to go get some coffee with me?"

Reid's eyes widen a little and his brows shoot up. "Oh, uh, I…" Tony patiently waits for Spencer to answer with a smile. "Well," Spencer thinks about the arm around his shoulder and the strange comment Agent David made when Tony offered to walk him down to the morgue, "Like a date?" he winces at the word.

"Not like a date," Tony shakes his head. "On a date." They enter the elevator, but Tony waits to press the floor button.

"Oh." Spencer sucks in a breath and shrugs. After all, Tony is pretty handsome. "I guess if we're not swamped with work it'd be okay." A grin breaks out on Tony's face. "But, I left my stuff up in the conference room. Can we stop by so I can get it?"

"Anything you want Spence."

Spencer chuckles at the nickname usually reserved for JJ's use only. Tony talks to him about the coffee shop he always goes to, and by the time they reach the conference room, Spencer is equal parts nervous and excited.

"Hey, uh, Tony and I are going to get some coffee, if it's okay," Reid announces, mostly to Hotch, but everyone else hears anyways.

"Yeah, don't be too long," Hotch tells him.

"Where are you going?" Morgan asks as he reenters the room, behind Reid and DiNozzo. Reid twists to face his friend.

"I'm going to get coffee with Tony," he says.

"Oh." Morgan has a crease between his brows now. "Hurry back Pretty Boy."

Morgan squeezes between the pair and starts flipping through a file, not looking at anyone. Spencer frowns at the odd behavior and rarely used name, but decides to wait to question his friend later. "Bye."

"So, Agent Morgan, were you two ever, uh… involved?" Tony crinkles an eye at the odd wording, trying not to sound too invasive.

Spencer and Tony are sitting in a small all night café down the road from the offices. They're lost in a crowd of murmuring business men and young men and women on dates, hands wrapped loosely around their cups. Tony leans forward with interest, but not too close to be uncomfortable. Spencer sits with his legs crossed, foot jiggling with nerves. So far, the conversation as been light, talking about their college days and work. Reid clears his throat.

"Ah, no." He gets a funny little smile and looks down. "Derek actually reminds me of you. Ladies' man, you know." Tony smirks at the comment. "I'm really surprised you asked me out on a date."

The smirk morphs into a small grin. "Spence, you're too adorable for your own good. How could I not ask you out?" Reid shakes his head, still smiling. "So profiler what can you tell about me?"

The said profiler looks up. Tony just cocks his head and waits. "Well, uh," Spencer pauses as the door chimes from somewhere behind him, letting in a familiar but unseen dark-skinned man, "You take great care of your appearance and exude confidence, almost to the point of arrogance. I'm guessing you had a strained relationship with your parents, and are making up for it by getting the attention of everyone else." Tony nods, looking impressed.

"You can read minds."

Reid laughs which makes Tony grin widely. He slyly moves his chair closer to the genius's. "I can read body language." Spencer doesn't mention the close proximity; he just smiles and looks Tony fully in the eyes.

"You've got a nice smile." It's spoken softly and with sincerity that causes Spencer to shake his head. "It's true."

A shrill ring cuts off any reply Spencer might have made. He shrugs apologetically, and answers the phone.

"Hey Hotch… Yeah… Yeah we'll be right there."

Reid grabs his cup and stands, Tony following suit. "They need us back in the office."

Together, comfortably bumping elbows, they exit the little shop, Tony even going as far as to hold the door open for his date. They never notice the agent sitting a few tables away, watching their every move.

Derek grips his cup a little too tightly; the lid pops off, dripping coffee drops on the table top. His stomach is knotted to the point that it hurts. His throat is scratchy and he can't stop fidgeting. He bolts to his feet, throwing away his untouched drink into the nearest trashcan.

He doesn't know why it never occurred to him before. Derek has known for a while now that he's liked Spencer, but he never thought that Reid would leave him for a date. He could always handle pushing his feeling away, knowing Reid would always be there anyways. He was content with being friends because Spencer was still his and his alone. But seeing him leave, happy and laughing, with another man.

Derek doesn't know why it never occurred to him before that he's the 'jealous type'.

Ah! I hope this was good! Definitely the longest chapter I've written. More to come soon! Please review with any and all criticism!