Destroy All Humans! In The Beginning

Commander Orthopox 13 (Pox) walked into the War Council Room of the Emperor's palace to meet General Gingivitis for his new assignment. They both walked towards each other and gave the Furon salute to each other.

"Hello, Pox"

"Hello, General"

"I believe you have been briefed on your mission?" said the General.

"Yes" said Pox. "But how could it be true? How could the DNA in our cloning banks be degrading?"

"We don't know, your mission is to find a source of pure Furon DNA, this will save us from going extinct and could possibly restore our races genitalia" said the General. "Do you have any planets you have in mind?"

"Three" said Pox. "Cylon, Mars, and an unknown hostile planet out in Sol-3, Sector-13"

"Holy Son of Arkvoodle! Mars, Pox!" asked the General.

"It sounds dangerous General, but I'll be alright" said Pox "Now when do I take off?"

"Pox, you will not be going alone"


"Emperor Meningitis thought it would be wise to assign you a couple Furon soldiers to help with the DNA gathering" said the General.

"So what fearless, experienced, skilled, elite Furon Warrior will I be taking?" Pox said.

"None, they all chickened out" said the General "But we do have two volunteers, there names are Cryptosporidium 136 and Cryptosporidium 137.

"Two clones at the same time?" Pox said. "How is that possible?"

"He was hated as a child and didn't have friends so he cloned himself to make a brother" General Gingivitis said.

"That is so stupid" Pox said. "What did you say his name was?"

Suddenly, a Disintegrator blast shot through the door of the War Council Room.

"Duck!" yelled Pox throwing the General to the ground.

The smoke cleared to reveal two identical Furon's laughing.

"Crypto!" the General yelled.



"Which one of you shot it?" he asked.

Both of them pointed at each other trying to blame one another.

Pox took a deep sigh and looked at the General.

"Our race is doomed" Pox said.