I sadly do not own Twilight or any of the characters relating to Twilight...we all know who does. I do own this idea of Edward though and I personally like him!
The angry waves crashed against the jagged rocky edge as I sat precariously teetering on the edge. The sun was setting over the trees, a blend of sweet pinks, calming purples, vibrant oranges, happy yellows, and soft reds. It was odd to me how something so beautifully simple could reign in the sky while complicated fury reigned below. How could two completely contradictory ideas coexist? Maybe it was all in my head. Maybe it was a metaphor for what me life had turned out to be. Beautifully simple to begin, like the sunrise. Complicated fury in the middle, like the waves crashing and eroding the rock. Beautifully simple to end. Just one insignificant teeter in the right direction. One move forward. One large gust of wind and a simply beautiful ending.
Last month, I was on top of the world. Today, I am lying on the bottom. In 30 short days I lost everything…
The sun was brightly shining, a rare occurrence in our rainy little town. Edward and I were lying entangled on the plush chaise lounge on his bedroom balcony. The second floor balcony afforded a beautiful view of the mountain ranges, a beautiful lush green forest, and a babbling brook outlining the property line. Although currently we weren't appreciating the view, rather were immersed in an intense conversation. Anyone looking in would see a couple quietly conversing, totally absorbed in each other. In reality, we were two lifelong best friends. 24 years old with the same soul and two hearts beating in tune. Everything to each other, yet nothing more. A cruel reality.
He was currently rehashing his last break up, which took place about a year ago. At the time, he was devastated, but now he tells a different story.
"…I can't believe I let things go as long as I did, Bella. How blind was I? Here I blamed myself for every mishap, every wrong turn, and every mistake. Here was Kate, sleeping with her co-worker from day one. She made me believe I was a terrible person, that I treated her so horribly. And I believed her. It broke me to pieces. I followed through with her every wish. I catered to her, when she wanted something… she got it, when she wished… it came true. I left so many people behind at her command. I nearly lost you. " His voice was soft and thick with emotion.
I reached up to console him, running my hand through his longer bronze locks. Just the way I liked it, not short like Kate. Ever since we were little, the only way to calm a riled Edward was to run fingers through his hair. In so many ways he is just like the boy I grew up with. Kind, beautiful, intelligent, charming, and innocent…he could get away with anything, with those pouty red lips, perfectly imperfect crooked grin and wide sea green eyes.
"I know, I know. She kept stringing you along, and then would snap back like a rubber band. I don't know how long she kept that up before you stopped giving in. She wanted what she could take. That's not a relationship, Edward. I don't know how many times she begged for you to come back and when you wouldn't budge, attacked you. I remember once, she had been relentless…begging. I could see you giving in. Only to agree to meet her at her house and find she was in bed with Tyler, your best friend. It was planned Edward. For whatever sick reason, she reeled you in and threw you back."
Edward hummed in agreement; his eyes closed enjoying the sensation of the spontaneous scalp massage.
Moving my lips closer to his ear I whispered "I would never do that to you E. You are like air to me. I need you indefinitely." Honestly, I did not really think through the implications of my statement.
Edward nudged me further into his embrace, albeit almost impossible since we were practically connected to begin with. He ran his nose softly along the planes of my face, caressing my own nose. Titling his head ever so slightly, he ran his nose down mine closing the last remaining distance. My heart sped up and my breath caught in my throat as his pillowy lips brushed mine gently, his velvet tongue peeking out to stroke my lips, begging for entrance. I opened my mouth to allow our tongues to taste each other. His lips languidly moved against mine like in a dance danced a thousand times. I didn't see the clichéd fireworks. I saw the future, played out in silver screen. Little snippets of our future together played like scenes in a movie, telling of a fairytale romance. My body thrummed with electricity as infinite tiny shocks left Edward's fingertips and entered my body, hardwired to my heart. He let off a moan, pulling me impossibly closer in the process, grinding his obvious arousal against my bare thigh. I gasped in pleasure as all previous thought process left and extreme need took over my senses. My fingers rubbed the planes of his defined chest and down to his strong stomach, pausing to rake my fingers down his treasure trail. Breaking the kiss for air, Edward ridded me of my tank top, dropping his head to my bare shoulder peppering kisses on my heated skin. My hands fell to his cargo shorts, fumbling with the belt and zipper; I slid them swiftly down his toned legs, lightly scratching the deep bronze hair on my way down, earning a deep rumbling moan. I sat up to admire his nearly naked body, save for the deep blue plaid boxer shorts slung on his narrow hips. He smiled crookedly, his eyes danced with an emotion I had never witnessed on Edward before. He reached for my tiny pink workout shorts, tickling the skin on the sides of my legs as he drew them down my legs. Running his hands from my ankles to the sides of my panties, his breath caught in his throat, looking into my eyes for silent permission to continue. I pushed him lightly on his back as I tugged his boxers down gently, his cock bouncing proudly out of the confines as I straddled his calves. Gently massaging his legs, I traveled further and further until I reached the promised land, reaching out to run my finger up the bulging vein running base to tip. I looked up to gauge Edward's reaction. His angelic face was upturned, eyes screwed shut. His pouty lips were parted, heavy pants of breath leaking from his lungs. My tongue darted out to lick the near-purple tip, finding a glimmer of precum. I groaned lightly taking in his taste, wanting to dive further in. Edward grabbed my arms and brought me up, straddling his hips, my lacy boyshorts rubbing against his erection, causing us both to groan in delight. Edward's hands trailed across my shoulder blades to snap the clasp of my bra, my breasts bouncing free as he laid the bra on the side of the chaise. His head bent to kiss the valley in between my breasts. Kissing left to the nipple and then right, avoiding where I wanted him most. His wet tongue trailed left again, swirling around the pebbled flesh, slightly biting down causing me to softly cry out in pleasure. Then right. His hands gripping my sides gently moved lower sliding my panties down my hips, exposing my bare pussy. I shifted gently, allowing my panties to be slid further down, finally able to kick them off myself. I trailed my fingers up to his face caressing his cheeks as I leaned down to capture Edward's lips with mine in a slow burning kiss shifting slightly aligning my core with his hard cock. Sinking down, we both let out guttural moans as we found our rhythm. Our breaths came out in quick pants and quiet moans as we neared our release. I lowered my lips to his once again as I felt my climax quickly approach, our hips continuing to meet thrust for thrust, his sharp thrusts hitting the bundle of nerves and my g-spot simultaneously. His eyes opened slightly, hands lightly caressing my chin as I bent to brush my lips with his again. Eyes locked, lips moving in harmony, hips moving in sync as we both fell over the edge, whimpering.
Edward and I had officially been together for a month. I say officially, because unofficially we had a deep connection since the beginning, manifesting itself in the form of friendship. I am not one for "let's celebrate our one month anniversary! Yay us!", however, when it comes to Edward I figured this was a monumental occasion, worth celebrating…albeit in an atypical fashion. No gifts would be given, no fancy dinner reservations, no flowers…nothing. This was an intimate, under-wraps celebration.
I had bought skin tight, nearly backless (and frontless to be honest), transparent white lace lingerie with a plunging neckline reaching my belly button, the bottom barely reaching below my ass. The thing was basically a teeny scrap of lace; underwear covers more. To go along with the ensemble, I purchased thigh high stiletto patent leather boots. I may or may not break my neck tonight. For the cause? Totally worth it.
Twirling in the mirror I gave myself the once over. Artfully teased "sex" hair? Check. Natural tones and lip gloss? Check. Skanky undies? Yes. Deathtrap shoes? Check. I, very carefully, walked to the kitchen to finish dinner. Homemade pizza. Why go fancy, when simple tastes just as good. I quickly finished setting the table and poured the wine into two crystal flutes. As I put the bottle of wine down in the chiller, I heard a quick succession of knocks followed by the door opening. I could barely contain my smile as it threatened to take over my face. Containing myself to a quick walk, I made my way into the entry way only to stop dead in my tracks, stumbling from the sudden momentum change from the shock.
"Hey, gorgeous" he crooned
He stalked toward me like a hunter circling his prey, reaching his hand out to caress the rough lacy contraption I regret wearing without a robe. Cringing from the contact, I backed away, hoping he wouldn't follow.
"What are you doing here? Is there something you need? You know, Edward is…"
He cut me off sharply, grabbing my wrist yanking me to him.
"I am here to take what's mine, Bella. I need you. I don't want to hear about Edward. Edward is so sweet. Edward is so smart. Edward is so gorgeous. GIVE ME A BREAK!" He roared.
"If not from our parents, it's always from you! He has you all fooled you know, he is nothing special. His own PARENTS didn't even want the kid! HIS OWN PARENTS. So my parents ended up with the brat. Carlisle just had to have Edward when he was given up at the hospital, minutes old, bundled up in blue. It wasn't enough they had a 4 year-old son, they needed another one! You know, he has it all. My parents, All-American athlete, academic prodigy, and the woman I have loved for years. I am SO SICK of it. Kate, with a bit of coaxing, was the only one with enough sense to see him for who he was, too bad she's gone. Oh the hours I spent talking to her about her precious Edward…" he smiled cynically
" You…you caused Kate…you?" I gasped, unbelieving.
"Don't be surprised, honey. Enough about Edward, I am here to claim what is rightfully mine. You. You have been in love with him for years, while I have loved you. He didn't even see it; it took him 24 years to realize what was in front of him. I can make you happy, I can love you right. I have always been there, and you chose Edward. Your mine, Bella! I won't let him take you away!" he growled holding my wrist tighter causing me to wince in pain.
With one more tug, I was flush against Jacob's towering frame, shaking in fear. His brown eyes turned black as he leaned forward forcing his lips harshly upon mine. He turned our bodies so my back was to the closed door and his back was to the living room, splaying his hands across my lower back. Fighting for a few seconds, realizing my attempts to overpower a 6'4-muscled-28 year-old man were futile, my body went limp, hoping Jacob would give up and leave before Edward arrived.
I heard the door open and footsteps enter the hall before I heard keys crashing to the floor. My eyes screwed shut hoping Edward would see this for what it was, unwanted physical contact. I heard a sob as Jacob pushed me away, eyes focused on Edward, a menacing smirk rested on his face.
I spun around quickly, only to see the devastated expression Edward wore on his face. Before I could formulate words, Edward spun and took off, leaving his keys behind.
In Edward's departure, Jacob slapped my ass and whispered "Well, thanks. My job here is done."
…That was five days ago. Edward's Volvo sits in my driveway, keys still where he dropped them.
So I sit, precariously teetering on the edge. I have not eaten, slept, or done much of anything for that matter, in 5 days. I have called Edward thousands of times, leaving hundreds of voice mails and text messages. I have called Esme and Carlise, Edward's parents. I have call Jasper and Emmett, Edward's two best friends. Nothing. The little information I have gotten has been from Alice and Rose, who are my best friends, but are fiercely protective of Edward. Apparently, Jacob's recollection of events differ from mine.
I had finally begged and pleaded enough, cried enough hysterical tears, to have Al and Rose meet me for coffee at my place. They came stalking in, faces set in hard lines, clearly with no bullshit attitudes.
"You know, you have some nerve. Coming on to Jacob, having Edward walk in to see it all, and now hounding everyone for information. You were his best friend, Bella. We were all friends. After all this shit with Kate, how could you?" Alice sneered.
"I am going to give you the damn information you want, so you will stop bothering everyone. It's not for you. It is for Edward. He doesn't need you harassing everyone for any bit of information they will fess up. If you cared so much, you wouldn't have been messing around with his fucking brother." Rose stated, eerily calm.
"After looking everywhere, Jacob finally found Edward at Carlisle and Esme's house, a complete mess. Apparently he left his keys at your place and Carlisle came to pick him up. As soon as he saw Jake, he was hysterical. Edward attacked Jake, breaking Jake's nose and left cheek. Esme had to call Jasper and Emmett over to break it up. Carlisle would get Edward away long enough for Jake to sit up before Edward would break free, attacking him again. It wasn't until Emmett and Jazz had a hold of Edward's arms and legs that Jake even got a word in." Alice looked to Rose to continue as I sat trying to absorb the information.
"When Jake told Edward you had been coming on to him for months, after he rejected you repeatedly, Edward was a mess. Not only had he kicked his own brother's ass, he had lost you the same way he lost Kate. You know, to this day you are the only one who knows everything that went down…Not even Emmett and Jasper know all the details. And you go and do something like this. You bitch."
"You don't know anything! If Jake "rejected" me, why the hell was he here then? He is lying! LYING! If you only knew half of the shit…"
Alice interrupted, impatiently. "Jake said you were having trouble with the electric fireplace. You called and asked him to take a look at it, and he felt uncomfortable being alone with you. So you told him Edward would be here. When he arrived, you were dressed to the nines in lingerie; waiting...kissed him as soon as he was walking out to leave. "
"Well Alice, it is plausible since Jake is an electrician, but I never made that phone call, you can check my fucking phone records! And I WAS dressed to the nines in lingerie, waiting. WAITING FOR EDWARD! It was our first month anniversary and I figured since it had taken us so fucking long to get together, I would do something special!" I growled
"You know what? You both… BOTH are the pots calling the kettle black. Alice, who begged Jazz to give you another chance after you were stuck in a similar, compromising situation that Jake set you up in? Who smoothed it over because Jasper would only listen to one person, since she had never been anything but honest? Rosalie, who convinced Emmett to give you a chance in the first place, after you whored around Forks for 4 fucking years of high school? Who convinced him those days were over for a Miss Rosalie Hale?" I puffed out an exasperated sigh.
"How could you think I would do that to him? We have all been friends our whole lives. I thought you knew me better than that. Before you pass all these judgments, get the facts straight and take a long hard look at Jacob Cullen. For now? Get out…" I whispered, laying my head on the cool granite counter, coffee forgotten. I didn't let one sniffle out until the front door clicked shut.
Now, I receive thousands of calls from Rose and Alice, apologizing. Texts to check in, offers to go out, knocks on the door. None of it matters, so I don't answer a damn one.
Just one insignificant teeter in the right direction. One move forward. One large gust of wind and a simply beautiful ending. I turn my head away from the sunset to see a more beautiful sight sitting next to me. Figuratively we teeter on the edge of a jagged rock, in reality we are a safe distance away from the edge.
This has always been our "laughin' place", coined our senior year summer after a trip to Disneyland. Splash Mountain had immensely reminded us of our hang out spot, known for many days wasted giggling at each other's antics, singing songs, and generally being together. It felt out of place being here with such a heavy atmosphere surrounding us.
"You can't run from trouble, there aint no place that far." I whispered into the wind, my voice carried away with the slight gust of wind inhabiting the early august night.
Edward whipped his head around to look into my eyes, green eyes penetrating my heart, effectively cutting the strings. Who am I kidding, he cut the strings long before I knew, and my heart has always belonged to him…its fated, he is the match to my one heart. Together we are whole.
"You can't run Edward. There isn't any place to go. You and I apart…it doesn't make sense. It isn't how life is intended. Cut the shit and listen. Listening and hearing are two separate phenomena. I know you have been hearing everyone, yet the only person you truly listen to is Jake. He is your older brother, I get it…but E, he has never been a brother to you."
Edward shook his head in protest, opening his mouth to rebut the accusation. I held up a finger and recounted everything. Everything Jake had said that day from their parents to Kate. Painfully, I watched a tear roll down Edward's cheek. And another. And a flood. I watched him take full responsibility for the last week, played out in his facial features. I watched him recount 24 years with Jake, evaluating every argument, every fight. I let him absorb all that was thrown at him before speaking again.
"You can't run from trouble, Edward. So stop running from me. You have been doing it for at least 8 years, if not longer. I know because I have been doing the same. We are together, no more unrequited love. It didn't exist but only in our minds. You take all this shit thrown at you and you run. You let it happen, and happen, and happen. You never make a stand. Stand Edward, STAND! You are worthy of the best in life, you deserve to be happy. So stop. Be happy, allow it to be. If you are unsure, ask. If you are pissed, scream. If you are sad, cry. For god sakes, quit running!" I finished with a barely audible whisper gauging his reaction.
"You can't run from trouble, Bella. You fight for everyone else. Me, Em, Jasper, Rose. You fight for us all. You plead cases, you talk us through hard times, you help make decisions. You have done it for all of us at one point or another. Em and Rosalie wouldn't be anything, if it weren't for your battle. Jasper and Alice would be done, if it weren't for you. Me, god only knows. But you never fight for yourself. You wore the latest fashions, painted your face, and styled your hair accordingly from the time you were in junior high because that's what your mother thought you should do. While you were a knockout, you would have given anything for your cosmetic bag to disappear, a hoodie, jeans, and chucks. You were a cheerleader in high school because Rose and Alice wanted you to be. While you had a great time, you would have liked to have joined knowledge bowl. You went to college for something your father thought you should do. While you are happy being a communication director at Microsoft, you would rather be a science teacher. You called 378 times in the last week, texted over 100 messages, left over 200 voicemails because that's what you believed I needed. You wanted to battle my demons for me,when all I really needed was to battle them myself. Never once did you fight for yourself. Never once did you say 'HEY, IT'S NOT MY FUCKING FAULT!'. That's what I needed from you. Past my initial shock, which took 4 days to evaporate, I saw the situation for what it was. A set up. Granted, I didn't come to that conclusion on my own, it is what it is. All I really needed to hear was you standing up for yourself, you vocalizing your belief in yourself and in us. You saying 'You can't run from trouble, there aint no place that far'."
I couldn't formulate a single word as he finished his monologue. I said I was sorry a million times, but never once did I claim it wasn't me. Never once did I stand up for myself, somehow giving Edward the impression I didn't believe in us. I can see it, I honestly couldn't tell him the outright truth because I didn't want the possible repercussions; ruining Edward's relationship with Jake, having Edward accuse me of lying, or worse, cheating. I bore the brunt of the incident by my inability to tell the situation at face value. I needed to trust Edward to make the proper decisions his own way; instead I made them for him by apologizing when I should have been blunt. Apologizing was running from the truth. I wasn't sorry, because it wasn't my fault. Was I sorry that it happened? Of course. Could I prevent it? Absolutely not.
My eyes met Edward's as I steeled my resolve. Ready to fight for myself. Ready to take a stand for me. Ready to get what I needed. I gazed into his eyes, reaching across the distance placing my hand over his heart.
"I love you."
One large gust of wind came swirling around the cliff, pushing me to the left and Edward to the right, us colliding in the middle clutching each other tightly. I looked up at Edward as he smiled, brushing his smile with mine in a pseudo kiss. I could feel the curl of his lips against mine, his teeth resting against mine. I imagined the sight, two people wide smiles touching. He must have been imagining something similar, because at the same time, as if fate had planned it herself…we giggled.
And there we have it; we have a happy beginning and a HEA. First time writing a sexual encounter…not sure if it failed or not!
Aannnd….I do not own the quote "You can't run from trouble, there aint no place that far"…It is from the wonderful DL ride, Splash Mountain. So is the "laughin place". Not my favorite ride at all…not at all. ;-)
As always, what do you think? 3