Hi people! I have been gone a long time from the land of Holly/Artemis, but I'm back, and better than ever! If you haven't read my other fic, A Lack of Talent, you really should. Go do it, like, right now. If you have, this is the same kind of humor, only with a little more romance. Also, for once this has been beta'd by my super-duper lovely beta Showpeople. If you're trolling for good stories, go read hers! Ahem, enough with the shameless plugging on the behalf of my beta. The rating id T for languege (we all know what d'arvit really means) and some small steamy scenes between our two favorite characters! I am going to inform you right now that this will be six chapters long. It was origanally going to be a one-shot, so the first two are one-shot length. Even if the first and second are super short, the third will be much longer(and is the reason this story is now in unnessasary chapters, evil glare at the plot bunny in the corner), just you wait! Now, without further ado, prepare to drown in fluff!

With love and affection,

Thief of Black Winged Hearts

Five Times Artemis Kissed Holly and the One Time He Didn't


It almost didn't count, and as his first attempt at a kiss, it wasn't all that spectacular. But beggars really can't be choosers, as the saying went. Then again, Holly almost had to give him points for even having the bravery (balls) to make the attempt. They were about to leave Artemis's past, eager to get back to their own time so they could save Artemis's mother. Holly was still furious with Artemis, seeing as he had lied to her. How could he not trust her? It was like the old days all over again.

They were standing very still, back in their underwear, waiting for Number One to activate the spell that would bring them home. The lemur was in a cage, held tightly under Artemis's arm like he was afraid something was going to fly across the room and take it from him. Holly huffed. Silly human. If he didn't stop standing there like that she was going to fly across the room and break his nose.

"Holly," Artemis said quietly, still not looking in her direction because they were in their underwear, after all. "How mad are you?"

Holly's reply was icy, even if she couldn't glare at him like she wanted to. "Very, mud boy," she said frostily, anger still pulsing in her head and closing up her throat.

"Ah," was all he said, and Holly should have known something was coming. The great Artemis Fowl the Second never said something as short and inarticulate as 'ah'. All of a sudden, Artemis darted over, kissed her right on the lips as her eyes widened in shock, and then leapt back. "How about now?" he asked calmly, still eyeing a particular corner of the ceiling.

Holly leapt with the intention of wrapping her hands around his throat and throttling him to death, but the time-shift caught her in midair, whisking them away before she could make it.

Real short, I know, but still, review!