"Sheeeegoooo! Words hurt you know."
That deserved a double-take. As did the sound of metal tapping metalloid from 2 o'clock.
Brows furrowed, I break the silence in confusion. "I didn't say anything Dr D. Actually I didn't even know you were planning anything."
"Oh, well that's just because I haven't told you yet." Moron. "Anyway you don't need to know it. It's going to be a surprise!" And insert evil laughter. Why do I bother? Maybe staying on the side of good would've been the better move. I shook my head of these thoughts; I enjoyed my life, even it wasn't perfect.
"Meaning ya got nothing." Dr. Drakken had the grace to look hurt before throwing his hands up in surrender and slumped.
"What's the use. No matter what I do, Miss 'All-That' Kim Possible always comes swooping in at the last minute and that buffoon blows up another premium insurance policy. I'm only one or two projects away from dipping into personal savings at this rate. They were right, all those years ago," he chuckled humorlessly.
"Doy." Dammit that's not what I needed to start with. What'm I supposed to do? I hate these heart-to-heart, chummy, loser pep-talks.
Knowing better than to expect the good doctor to beg me to stay, I sigh before chiding "I guess Kimmie must be 'all that' and maybe then some if she taught you to quit. They also say you can't teach an old dog new tricks, but here we are again. Tail between our legs, crying home to Mama Lipsky." That only happened once, but god was that once too many… Chills still lit my spine at the memory of pretending to be Drewbie's girlfriend when she insisted they stayed over for Mother's Day. Humiliation nation. "Y'know I bet the Possibles really can do anything after all," I goad after a pause, intent on the sudden growl on his lips. There. That should do it.
"Now Shego, I pay you to steal things NOT TO MAKE FUN OF ME!" I wonder what color Dr D would be if he ever flushed hard enough to make most people purple. Idle thoughts at an idle (almost-there) threat. I know "personal savings" meant legal money, and he knows reducing my pay is not an option. Not that he knew I'd stay just to make sure His Bumblingness is alive and intact. We ARE a family after all, albeit evil, but one nonetheless.
I check my nails, "Maybe so, but I don't see me stealing anything right now. I know I'm good, but even I'm not that good." I pull my eyes to stare blankly at his face, "Are we going to mope here all night or do I have somewhere better to be?"
"I don't approve of you staying out late on a work night."
I groan and roll my eyes. "Okay, Dad, but that's not what I meant." Looks like someone's back in the game. "Got a job for me or not? There's beauty sleep to be had, who cares if I don't need it."
"Go to sleep then, you get cranky when you're tired." I swallow a laugh at that. And it sounds like someone, somewhere else did too. "I'll figure some things out in the morning."
Sincerity or sarcasm? "Thanks for looking out Dr D," the latter had definitely won, "don't know what I'd do without you."
"Yes, yes I know I don't know what I'd do without you." He paused, "Wait, huh?"
This time I didn't stop the laugh from spilling to my lips. The doofus really was like a dad to me: always trying to take care of me and protect me (ironic I know) but mostly from normal kid-things like fevers, or hangovers and overly-amorous advances towards me when I'm drunk. Okay maybe not just kid things. But he provides for me and is there if I ever need him. Not that we'd ever admit it to each other. Learning some of the rumors about our "romance" sickened me a little; He's practically twice my age! But still he would've made a great father to anyone: loving, caring, supportive.
I wave him off as I turn and announce, "Whatever. If you need me, I'll be in my room, three floors under, down the hall on the third left. Don't need me." I started off when he called to me again, making me almost miss the whisper of cloth sliding on a hard surface.
"I know where your room is…" bemusement on his face. Affectionately, "Good night Shego. And thanks."
"G'night" With force behind my steps, I stroll off to disable the traps in my room.
Biting my lip to choke down the panic, I make my way to where she told Drakken she'd be. I found myself wondering - not for the first time - what I was doing there. There's no reason for me to be here. She knows I'm here and that I want to talk to her. HOW can she know that? I've always snuck in like this and she's never caught me before. Maybe I'm slipping. Maybe she's always known.
Lost in thought, I almost miss my turn. Double- and triple-checking, first my counting and then lefts and rights, I follow the vent to the end to find the grate already removed for me. Here goes nothing. I jump down to the empty floor expecting the worst and screaming at myself for being foolhardy enough to not "look before I leap" into what could've easily been the bottom of a cage, or a hologram over a giant pit, or worse, the unknowable and bizarre. Landing with more pain than I'm accustomed to and less grace than I'd like, I slowly take in my surroundings for the first time.
It was just a normal looking room. It looks a little like mine actually, just without the Cuddle Buddies. Bed, shelf with books, desk, closet.
I didn't see the adjacent bathroom until she spoke, "Usually if someone's in my room, they're looking at me, but I'll make an exception for you this time, since they usually come in with me too." Startled, I trip myself over the plush rug as I swivel to find her voice. I close my eyes with the knowledge that I couldn't correct my footing for the fall. My hands shoot out in front of me. When the jarring impact didn't come, I realize I had stopped falling and open my eyes again in confusion. I blushed at what I saw. Hot damn.
Shego was holding me with a hand on each shoulder as I was gripping the sides of her towel. I burned as I noticed my eyes were leveled to a little bit above where her belly button would be.
"Oh now you look." Close your eyes Possible! Wrenched shut, I block the vision of Shego's pale, almost-green body wrapped in an equally lush black towel. True to her stripes, even for shower time. "Charming Princess, but now that you're not falling, you maybe wanna trying standing on your own again?" she reprimanded. "But seriously, either support yourself or don't let go of the towel."
Mortified, I back up before registering that I had done both. If I get any redder, I'll blow. I stretch my hand out to offer the towel. The proffered object was snatched up quickly. Plaintively, "S- Sorry."
"God you're such a prude. You can open your eyes now." I saw she was in her towel once again with her arms folded in front of her chest and despite her words, was wearing a light blush of her own. When she blushes, she looks pretty normal. Who knew red and almost-green make for a tan? In fact, she's only a little lighter than me, maybe Ron's color. "What are you ogling at now?" I fought the urge to clamp my eyes shut once more.
"Sorry, I'll just let you get dressed first," I fidget and couldn't keep eye contact. Shego grumbled and shoved me unceremoniously onto her bed.
My protest died before its time when she just walks away. "Just sit there, I'll be right back." I lie back, envious of the older girl's curves. My boobs are so small they're pointy. As if to prove it to myself, I tilted my head to regard my breasts and took one in my hand. Admittedly, they were a bit heftier than when I'd first started the hero gig. Vitamins, calcium, and a year into college will do that to a girl. I should've heard Shego come back into the room.
"Well now, first sneaking in - not unlike you - but then crashing into my room, crashing into me, staring at me, NOT-staring at me, and now you're laying in my bed touching yourself? Someone's done some growing up. What happened to the goody-goody Possible I love to loathe?" Her words threw me back into the reality of the sitch: I ripped my hand from my chest so fast I could almost feel the veins backing up. I saw her watch me with genuine amusement before a smirk lighted her features. "If you're propositioning me, Princess, I'll have you know I have standards."
I glared at her until she giggled. Giggled? What'd I miss? "Kimmie you look so ridiculous," Shego laughed. I gave into the situation, it is kinda funny. A grin broke across my face and we embraced the mirth that overcame us.
Enemies, remember Kim? She's not Miss Go. No, she's better: she's real. She's not your friend. Just do what you came here to do. Composing myself, I ease us back down. I scoot over so the now-dressed woman could sit on her own queen bed. She silently leaned in to curl her legs under her. I wish she was my friend though, or at least talking more, I don't know where to start.
As if sensing my predicament, she said not unkindly, "You and I both know you didn't drop in to eavesdrop on Dr. D's low self-esteem and make a blithering mess of yourself. Spill. What's the sitch?"
When you talk like that, it dawns on me I have no idea how old you are. Sighing, I let the question sit and gather some dust as I gather some confidence.
"Shego, I need your help." When I didn't continue, she prompted me on with a raised eyebrow. "I'm pregnant."