A/N: This idea just popped into my head so I wanted to see where I could go with it. Also, since it's a humour fic it's not to be taken too seriously. Enjoy!
Oh and I don't own Zelda or anything else already copyrighted which may be referenced in this story.
It was another normal day in Hyrule Castle. The guards were patrolling the grounds, the King was entertaining guests from another kingdom and Link was running for his life through the corridors. Rounding another corner, he stopped to take a breath before peeking around the wall to check if she was coming.
It had been an ordinary day down at the lake, he had been doing some fishing in a boat he had rented from the lakeside scientist. Then, out of nowhere, it happened. Princess Ruto emerged from the water, zoning in on him like a shark with its prey. Before he had time to react, she had lunged onto the boat ready to devour his face with hers in a mad act of passion. Luckily, he had been able to back flip out of the boat and swim to shore. It had been six years since he'd saved Hyrule and he'd hoped she would have given up on the crazy idea of marrying him, but to no avail, the Zora wouldn't give up that easily. She assumed he was simply playing hard to get and quite enjoyed the chase. In an attempt to lose her Link had arrived at the castle where he hoped Zelda would be able to distract the princess long enough for him to disappear within the many corridors of the castle. So far it had worked.
Walking along a corridor he hadn't been before, the young man stopped at an unusual door which was engraved with swirling patterns and various symbols he didn't recognise. Giving it a gentle push, he was shocked to find it opened to reveal a dark room. The only light came from a large blue box at the back of the room, a replica of the Master Sword in its pedestal set on top.
"Zelda never mentioned this thing..." Link ran a hand along one side of the box, finding it was a door. Deciding he had nothing better to do, he pushed open the door and stepped inside.
"Sorry Ruto, I don't know where he is," Zelda tried to calm the Zora girl down.
"What am I doing wrong?" Ruto sulked, sinking into a large armchair. "I thought men liked women with confidence!"
"There's confidence and then there's insanity," Zelda mumbled to herself. "Maybe you should give him some space," she said aloud.
"He doesn't need space! He needs my love!" Ruto sprang out of the chair. "I knew you'd try to break us apart but it won't work!" Running out of the room, she continued her search for Link.
Zelda sighed. She was the princess of Hyrule who had many duties to attend to, one of which was not ruining Ruto's supposed love life. About to head out the door, she almost fell to the floor as the castle began to rumble violently. Gripping the arm of one of the chairs, she wondered if Impa was teaching her weekly ballet class again. However, before she could come up with another answer there was a bright blue flash throughout the building.
"No!" She gasped. "I didn't think he'd find that."
The inside of the box was huge! It seemed impossible to Link, even after all of his adventures, that something so small could hold so much equipment. In the centre stood a circular desk which was home to a number of different coloured buttons and handles. Pressing the first one his hand came across, Link gasped as the box began to shake and it almost felt as if it was taking off. But that was ridiculous, they were inside the castle! Bracing himself as the shaking become more vigorous, he waited and hoped it wouldn't be long until this 'ride' was over.
Finally the shaking came to an end. Moving towards the door, Link looked back into the room before leaving.
"Ruto...?" He asked, wondering if she'd found him and had been trying to knock over the box or something. Hearing silence, he figured it was nothing and the box was obviously useless.
Making his way back upstairs, he heard unfamiliar voices coming from one of the sitting rooms. Peering through the gap in the door, he could just make out what they were saying.
"It's so wonderful that you and the prince are engaged," a woman who looked like one of the maids said.
"Thank you. I've been waiting for him to ask for a while," a dark-haired woman replied.
Taking a closer look, Link was sure the second woman looked familiar... Suddenly footsteps echoed in the next corridor which should have worried him but most of the castle staff knew who he was so there wouldn't be a problem.
"Intruder!" A guard exclaimed when he spotted Link.
"What? I'm not!" Link raised his hands in defence.
"Don't move another inch!" A group of guards appeared from both sides, weapons ready in case the boy tried anything.
Link grit his teeth. He couldn't believe this was happening. Had Zelda joined sides with Ruto? Was she going to have him locked in the dungeon so she could have her wicked way with him? Looking up he noticed the high windows had small ledges, just enough for him to hookshot up to. Quickly taking out the item, he aimed for the closest ledge and let the chain propel him through the air. There was a loud crash as he flew through the glass, hand shielding his eyes from the impact.
"Sorry Zelda, I hope that window wasn't important," he mumbled, rolling down the grassy hills outside the castle and into the market.
Upon entering the town he knew something was wrong but couldn't quite work it out. Looking around, his eyes widened when he realised some of the shops had vanished. The Happy Mask shop was nothing but empty space and the areas which usually belonged to the Potion shop and Bazaar were now taken up by small stalls. The townsfolk also seemed different, he had never seen any of the people wandering between the stalls and buildings.
Making his way into the field, he noticed everything looked the same but there was still something that didn't sit right with him. Taking out his ocarina, he decided he'd ask Saria. She was always the first person he went to when something was wrong so he was sure she could put his mind at rest. Playing her song, he waited a few moments until her voice entered his mind.
"Saria?" Link asked.
"Um hi, who are you and how do you know my song?"
"It's me, Link!" He started to panic.
"Never mind, wrong number," Link put down the ocarina and sighed. "OK so Saria doesn't know who I am, no big deal, maybe she banged her head on something. I know, I'll go to the lake and see if Ruto's there waiting for me again, at least she can confirm if I'm going crazy or not." It wasn't often he went to Ruto to confirm his sanity so he knew something must have been wrong. Taking the ocarina once more, he played Epona's song and waited.
And waited some more.
"Perhaps Malon is using her," Link nodded to himself. "Or she's lost her hearing... or legs." Giving up the wait, he took to the dusty path and began the long walk.
"Take that you filthy wench!" A small blast of golden magic shot through the air, blasting into an octorok which appeared to be dead.
Link stopped to listen when he heard a male voice shouting from the area just outside Gerudo Valley. Scurrying behind a large rock, he peered over the top to see a boy around the same age as himself. Spiked dark red hair moved in the wind as he leapt towards the creature, a long blade slashing at it with each move of his muscular arm. Smirking in triumph at every hit, the boy's yellow eyes gleamed with joy. He wore black and brown armour over his chest while his dark trousers were loose to allow for the searing heat of the desert.
"Given up already?" He sneered at the decapitated octorok. "I knew you weren't worthy."
Link covered his mouth to stop the boy hearing his laughter. He'd done a lot of play fighting in his time but had never insulted his 'enemy' in that way before. Coming back to reality, he started to wonder why a male was playing around Gerudo Valley. The only male Gerudo he knew was...
"Ganondorf!" A female voice shouted from across the bridge. "Are you attacking helpless creatures again?"
"It was not helpless! It was just concealing its true powers," the boy huffed, picking up the octorok by one of its legs and slinging it into the river.
Link's mouth dropped open. There was no way that guy was Ganondorf! Ganondorf was older, stronger and sealed away in a dark realm. Either this was some sort of strange dream or the box had transported Link to another time, a time from the past.