Disclaimer: I don't own Transformers!
(Crack, Prowl, Jazz, Ratchet. enjoy!)
Jazz had to admit it. Prowl was acting very weird.
The SIC had been stalking around the ARK for nights on end, and even he was starting to think that the Praxian had something to do with bits and pieces of bots going missing. Sunstreaker had lost one of his helm fins, much to the vain bots horror, Tracks had literally lost his helm and the only clue that they could be given over the com link was that, he was in a very dark place.
Optimus himself had even been a victim of the thief's stealing spree. He now had to wear the scarf that Carly's mother had knitted him around his lower faceplate. The Prime was seriously regretting not taking up Ratchet's offer of making him a spare facemask.
Ratchet grumbled loudly as he slouched at a Rec-Room table over his ration of energon, an upset Wheeljack beside him.
"Woah, what's the matter with you guys?" Jazz asked grabbing his own cube and bouncing into a seat.
"The Thief happened" Ratchet growled "He took my favourite wrench and Wheeljack's new project"
"Oh" Jazz said patting Wheeljack on the arm "Never mind 'Jack it'll turn up, you might have just misplaced it, like with that magnet that accidently magnetised Sideswipe to the floor."
"Maybe you're right Jazz" Wheeljack sighed draining his cube and standing "I'm going to go work on some stuff, I'll see you later Jazz, Ratchet"
"See ya, 'Jack!" Jazz called waving as the medic waved a hand over his shoulder at the engineer.
"To be honest I think this thief is the reason that Prowl has been a bit skewed lately" Ratchet said swirling the energon before finishing the cube. "He was an enforcer before the war."
"So was I, but you don't see me stalking the corridors at night and acting mysterious whenever someone mentions something shiny" Jazz said
"What do you mean shiny?" asked Ratchet curiously pausing as he put his empty cube in the recycler.
"You know, Shiny. Adjective used when referring to Sunstreaker or Tracks when they buff themselves?" Jazz snickered earning himself a poisonous glare and a rubber duck to the head. "What the frag is that?"
"A rubber duck, it's the only thing in my artillery that isn't shiny" Ratchet grumbled as if he had had an epiphany, picking up the squeaky bath toy and sub-spacing it again "Come with me"
"Now, what do all the stolen objects have in common?" Ratchet asked his fingers flying over the keyboard, information packets flooding the screen.
"They're metal" Jazz said with a shrug "Sunny's helm fin, Track's head, Wheeljack's doodad, Prime's mask, your wrench etc, etc"
"Metal that is normally very shiny!" Ratchet said with an evil smile as he found the file he was looking for "This is it!"
"Woah, woah, woah" Jazz choked as he scanned the information "You're telling me that's the reason that Prowl's gone a mysterious on us?"
"Precisely" Ratchet grinned as he activated his comm. link "Prowl, please report to the medbay"
"On my way Ratchet" Prowl's stoic tone clipped back.
"So you're telling me that Prowl is the Thief?" Jazz said with a frown "Because Praxian's use shiny objects as gifts to attract mates?"
"I'm assuming that he is getting ready to try and attract a mate, yes" Ratchet said as Prowl walked into the medbay "So who's the lucky mech Prowl?"
"It's my shiny" Prowl immediately replied before his optics widened and clapped his servos over his mouth.
"Aha" Ratchet almost purred with satisfaction "it was you collecting shiny objects"
Prowl's wings flared up in a 'v' and his engine growled in defence. "Oh shut up, I don't want your trinkets" Ratchet snapped "Just tell me why you didn't tell me you were going to try and mate?"
"I'm leaving now" the SIC grumped stalking from the medbay
"Ah, he's going to check on his stash" the medic grinned clapping his hands "Oh, this is going to be fun!"
A package had been left on his desk.
Wearily he skirted the desk, tossing his stylus at the gift just in case it exploded. When nothing but a metal chime and the slight ripping noise of paper happened he crept forward and undid the blue bow on top.
It was Sunstreaker's helm fin polished to a fine shine.
"Ratchet" Jazz hailed as he picked up the 'gift' "I found Sunstreaker's helm fin"
"Where did you find it?" the medic queried gleefully halting his defragging of Red Alert's processor
"I just received it as a gift…" Jazz trailed off as he realised what it implied.
"Congratulations Jazz" Ratchet laughed down the link "Prowl wants you to have his sparklings"
"Praxians collect and horde Shiny objects to gift to an intended. The suitor chooses his favourite item from his horde and gifts it to his intended, if rejected the suitor continues to gift bits of his horde to his chosen mate until they accept them as their mate. If the Suitor runs out of gifts, he/she gives up" Ratchet recited from the screen as Jazz held Sunstreaker's helm fin out to him.
"I've seen Prowl's horde Jazz." the medic grinned lecherously as Jazz breathed a sigh of relief "You're going to be courted for a vorn at least!"
"Look on the brightside Jazz" Wheeljack giggled from where he was lying on the medical berth as the saboteur's faceplates drained of energon in mortification "We'll be getting Track's head back sooner or later!"