Title: Four things Young expected TJ to do, and one he didn't
Author: Shenandoah Risu
Content Flags: canon character death
Spoilers: Season 2 "Epilogue"
Characters: Everett Young, Tamara Johansen
Word Count: 461
Summary: He wished he had her strength, her courage, even then.
Author's Notes: Written for the LJ Comm sgu_challenge prompt #057 "Unexpected".
Disclaimer: I don't own SGU. I wouldn't know what to do with it. Now, Young... Young I'd know what to do with. ;-)
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Four things Young expected TJ to do, and one he didn't
He expected her to dismiss his offers of friendship and support, and his less and less disguised desire for her. She was so much younger than him, smart, driven, capable. He let himself dream of her, fantasize about her, because he thought he didn't have a snowball's chance in hell with her. He never expected to have his affections returned to him, never expected her to feel the same way, but she did.
He expected her to hate his guts after they decided to call it quits, after he made every effort to mend his relationship with his estranged wife. He expected her to keep her distance, to give him the cold shoulder, to avoid him at all cost. But she was thoroughly professional about it, both on Icarus and later on Destiny. She treated him with the same care and compassion she had for all of her patients. He suspected that a lesser human being would have collapsed under the heavy burden, but she bore it with her head held high, and he wished he had her strength, her courage, even then.
He expected her to exclude him from her pregnancy after she had confessed it to him. He sensed that she didn't want to trouble him, didn't want to get him into awkward situations in front of his crew, and he racked his brain over ways to help her without embarrassing her. But she gave as good as she got, making sure he never treated her differently from anyone else, but still seeking him out in those rare quiet moments, so he could feel their unborn child move inside of her.
He expected her to get together with Varro, once they had arrived on Novus. The Lucian was so much closer to her age, and outside the chain of command, without the specter of a past relationship that neither one of them was ever able to fully deal with, without the constant reminder of their murdered child. He thought he'd spend the rest of his days pining away for her, watching her raise a family, and him trying desperately to be happy for her. Instead she saw his need, a mirror of her own, matching wounds, and within weeks they had gravitated back towards each other, as if they had never been apart.
He never expected to watch her die a little more each day, so young still as he held her hand, weeping, when she finally slipped away. He never expected to hold her body, to bury her, and to raise their two children all by himself. But he knew he'd never stop loving her, and indeed, his last conscious thoughts, many years later, were of her.