Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING!

Warnings: INCEST! GAY! SEX! YAOI! SEXYGAYINCESTSEX! MASTURBATION! TWO WAYS! THREE WAYS! FOUR WAYS! LOTS OF WAYS TO HAVE SEX SO PLEASE PLEASE LEAVE IF YOU'RE NOT READY TO HANDLE IT!

A/N: So I was just watching HBO and they're having a weird Jerry Lee Lewis themed marathon, and I finally thought of the perfect opening for this fic! I had most of it planned out already, I just couldn't figure out where to start the damned thing! -_-

Anyway, this is MadaIzuItaSasu... yeah... that would mean four sexy Uchiha's and one bed. Well... at times, just two per bed... but never EVER one... cus what fun is ONE Uchiha in a bed? Unless of course, they're waiting sexily for ME to come claim them...

Enjoy!

The youngest Uchiha stared at the television and frowned. "I don't get it." He said, looking over to his brother in puzzlement.

"I don't get why we're watching this!" His elder cousin Shisui exclaimed, sighing dramatically and collapsing unnecessarily hardly onto the couch.

Itachi frowned at his cousin and turned towards Sasuke. "He's losing his fans because they just found out that he's married to his thirteen year old cousin, but he doesn't care because he loves her, so now both of them are getting deported back to America."

They were in the middle of watching Great Balls Of Fire a movie about the life of American Rock & Roll superstar Jerry Lee Lewis. Shisui had been opposed to watching it, saying that it would be boring, and he didn't want to have to practice his English if he wasn't in school, but Sasuke had wanted to watch it, so together with Itachi they outvoted him.

"Why are they so mad at him about something silly like that?"

"Because it's wrong to feel that way about your family, and it's wrong to feel that way about someone when you're twice their age." Shisui answered.

Sasuke pouted. "Well that doesn't make any sense at all. Mentally she's just as old as he is, and love is love! It doesn't matter if you're family or not. If anything, that just makes it stronger. Right, Nii-San?" The boy turned towards his brother.

"Of course, Otouto. The only thing I find disgusting about the situation is of course that she's a girl."

Shisui rolled his eyes and pretended to gag. "You two are even sicker than the movie." He mumbled as he heard his aunt stepping into the room.

"Hello there boys! How would you feel about going on a little camping trip with the grown-ups? I'm sure you'll meet other children there to entertain yourselves with."

"Auntie, Ita-kun and Sasu-chan are oddly good at entertaining themselves without the other children, it'd mean that I'd be the only one who had to make friends. Please just let me stay." Shisui begged.

"I don't want to go either, Mum." Sasuke added with pleading eyes. He hated meeting new people, and even more than that he loathed watching Itachi meet new people. He and his brother were joined at the hip. Always had been, for as long as he could remember. They belonged to each other and had no need to make new friends or socialize, so why go try and find hiding spots where they could be alone on some stupid camping trip when they could just remain home?

"Shisui-kun, you have to come. Your parents already said so, sorry. As for my two little demons," Mikoto continued, smiling lovingly at her sons. "It just so happens that your father's cousins are in town, and have also decided not to go. If they're willing to come stay at the house with you for the next ten days then you can stay."

"What cousins?" Itachi asked.

"You remember Uncle Madara and his brother Izuna, don't you?"

Itachi frowned. "Madara, yes. The last time I saw Uncle Izuna was before Sasuke was born."

Mikoto laughed lightly at the saddened look on her elder son's face. "Ah yes, the five years of misery and woe before you had a brother. So you haven't completely blocked them out then?"

"Verry funny, Mother. Should we go ask them now?"

"Yes, as quickly as possible."

Itachi nodded and reached out automatically for Sasuke's hand, finding that it reached out for his at the exact same moment. He smiled, running his thumb absentmindedly across the back of his brother's fingers while they walked over to their elder cousin's home, then he knocked.

After a few moments, the cousin he'd come to know as Uncle Madara answered the door with a bathing towel around his waist. He smiled down at the two boys.

"Ah, my little nephew-cousins. Come in, sit down, take a load off." He grinned broadly and ushered them to a seat in the living room, then handed each of them a cup of tea. They were just sitting when another man who Itachi was only barely familiar with calm walking into the room.

He had on gray cotton drawstring pajama pants, but they clung in odd places, emphasizing that he was soaking wet. Sasuke leaned over to Itachi and placed a hand gently on the elder's shoulder before moving closer and whispering in his brother's ear.

"Aniki, they just got out of the shower... both of them."

"Quiet, Sasuke." He hissed at barely a whisper, looking back up at his fellow clansman.

"Sorry to call on you at such an odd hour, I feel pretty rude just walking in here out of nowhere... I know we're not especially close or anything, but-"

"Just spit it out." Madara said kindly.

Itachi took a deep breath. "Would you two mind coming to stay at our house with us for ten days so that we don't have to go on a camping trip with the rest of the family?"

"Sure. That sounds fine. We'll come over later tonight, you can go get a room ready for us when you finish your tea."

Madara studied his nephews carefully. They were sitting closely together on the couch, Sasuke's left ankle was slightly crossed over Itachi's right, but neither of them seemed to notice. Also he spotted Itachi's hand resting effortlessly on Sasuke's thigh. The boy's were being completely nonchalant about it, and not acting tense at all which suggested that they were touching like that nearly all the time.

He nearly wanted to laugh, but instead he smirked, looking over towards his own beloved younger brother. Izuna had also noticed the boys' position and raised an eyebrow at Madara curiously to see if they were thinking the same thing.

Itachi noticed the silent exchange and quickly straightened up so that he wasn't touching Sasuke at all, which really only made the situation worse, because Sasuke hadn't noticed that Madara and Izuna were noticing he and Itachi's behavior, so he didn't hesitate to reach out for Itachi's hand and instinctively stroke it.

Izuna watched for a moment then smiled. "Itachi-Kun, it looks like your brother is anxious when he's not touching you."

Sasuke gasped and flinched away from Itachi, looking down at the ground shamefully.

"How unoriginal." Izuna stated softly, smiling at his brother in a very... personal... way. Madara chuckled.

"What do you mean?" Sasuke asked bravely.

Madara grinned mischievously. "My brother was just mentioning to me how silly you two are being."

"Silly?" This time it was Itachi who questioned the elder.

"Yes. You both seem to think that you're the first little Uchiha boys to break the rules."

"What rules?" Itachi asked with a gulp. Izuna widened his eyes in mock amusement.

"How many have you broken?" Their younger uncle asked with a devious sense of knowledge that put both Itachi and Sasuke on edge.

"I'm sure we have no idea what you two are talking about. The tea was good. We need to go prepare the house for your stay."

"If you insist." Madara answered.

"Ehm... there's only one guest room, so one of you might need a sleeping bag..." Sasuke added awkwardly.

"Nonsense, we'll sleep together, of course." Madara replied.

Sasuke nodded and rose, with Itachi right behind him and exited the odd home. They'd only reached the end of the yard when Sasuke started crying.

"They knowww... Someone knows! Someone's actually found us out! What are we going to do?" He squealed, clinging to Itachi.

His brother held him tightly. "We wait. We wait and see how much is obvious, how much they're just guessing at, and how much they've noticed from experience."

Sasuke sniffled and looked up at his Nii-San. "Experience? C'mon Aniki, just cus they're close... doesn't mean they're... well... as close as we are."

"I thought that too. But what you said earlier about the showering is right, they definitely both just got out. And I helped father with the blueprints for the complex after renovation, remember?"

"Yeah, so?"

"I know for a fact, that there's only one bathroom in that house."

A/N: REVIEW!

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-Beloved