You're the best tight-rope walker in the world.
Foot over foot and straight lines over many endless straight lines. Your eyes are crossed and the world watches you, breathless, waiting for a fall and a broken bone and sirens but you're still, silent as ever, poised and balanced as everyone urges you to tumble.
There's a boy who loves you very much, with sad eyes and a dumb grin and hands that fit awkwardly over yours. He's tall and protective and everything you need in a guy, but your hearts are many miles apart, and even if you were to spend your entire life kissing him and brushing past him in the hallways, you understand, on a certain level, that the tendrils of your heart won't connect with his.
They're too far apart.
But there's a world out there. It shakes and screams and begs for you to enter it, spread your wings and jump off the tight-rope.
On the borderline stands another boy.
He's everything you want yet not nearly everything you need, and it takes no more but a tug at the shoulders and a warm breath on his forearm and he's slipping inside of you, taking you for everything you're worth. A sigh and a gasp and a moan and you're becoming the world's greatest faller.
His eyes are warm and soft and gentle but he enters you quickly, sinking his teeth into your breast, urging you to feel and want him like he wants you. You're the first boy and girl on earth.
You scream his name at the top of your lungs, but no one hears you, and he swallows your guilt with his tongue.
You fall from the greatest heights. The world's greatest tight-rope walker who can't seem to find her perfect balance.
Slip. You tumble ungracefully to the ground and your skull cracks against the concrete. The crowd grows hush-silent, and then the wailing begins, and the people chatter, and the world cries for you, the tiny little tight-rope walker who never seemed to understand what she really needed.
There's a baby wrapped in a pink blanket with your face and his nose. She looks like you.
She looks like you.
But you signed the papers and forced him to do the same, the boy on the threshold of the world, waiting for you to come with him into the darkness and leave the safety of all you've ever known.
For the split moment that you hung suspended in the air, before you crashed to the ground, you thought it was funny how you were never able to stop trembling as you placed one foot in front of the other.