I do not own Psycho Busters, nor do I profit in the writing of this fiction. Critic/review please; tell me if you think it's too brief/out of character/etc. Keeping in-character was kind of difficult.
Pairing inspired by Ren Ichimoku fan1.
He hadn't meant to stumble upon this. Takemaru's face heated up instantly and his eyes widened at the sight, the thought, of Kakeru being that close to someone. Kissing. Someone that wasn't him. Not that it surprised him, to see Kakeru with Ayano. Everyone knew what went on between them, even if they were oblivious to what they knew. And the idea that Kakeru would ever love anyone but her was just a dream of his. A silly fantasy of his.
The first syllable of Kakeru's name slipped from his mouth in a soft whisper before he realized what he was doing. His body and his mind didn't want to react quickly, however, and he stood gaping for a few seconds until he regained control. The two looked like they were into it. The quiet noise from their kiss sounded like a pounding drum in his ears, and the way they held on to each other...
Silently, he turned around and closed the door, leaning back against it and musing on the agonizing throb that now occupied his chest. Every heart beat reverberated through his body painfully. The result was both familiar and foreign to him; Takemaru knew pain well, had known it for most of his life, and his current situation vaguely brought to mind the bastards who'd burned his eye as a child. This was different. This pain may have been even worse, because he knew how to deal with physical pain, and knew that the memories would always start to dull over time. He didn't know how to handle this, because it wasn't something he could claw or scratch at or take medicine to make it go away.
This, Takemaru realized, was what heart break felt like.
It was enough to make him forget what he'd been planning to ask Kakeru before, but an inkling of common sense remained, however small that scrap was. He'd been an idiot for ever thinking he'd had a chance with the boy, because the person he loved was obvious to everybody, and it definitely wasn't Takemaru. And he also realized that it would be best to leave before one of them opened the door and realized how long he'd been standing there.
Takemaru's eyes were downcast as he traipsed along the hallway, very slowly. The image of the kiss was burned into his mind – the slow, sweetness of it, how warm and happy they both looked, how peaceful Kakeru had appeared with his eyes closed and his mind elsewhere – and it made him feel tired and sluggish in contrast. It felt like Kakeru had been keeping secrets from him, like there were things he was afraid to let the others know. On the other hand, what Kakeru did and with whom wasn't really any of his business, and he felt ashamed for moping over it like a pathetic, lovesick fool.
Which, undeniably, he was.
Takemaru was too involved with his self-berating to notice another person attempting to squeeze by in the hallway. Their arms brushed briefly and he froze at the contact; Takemaru was a prideful person and immediately straightened in an attempt to make his despair less noticeable. The other person, one of the few people shorter than he was at their age, halted also, staring at him with large, curious eyes.
"Xiao Long..." Takemaru sighed in relief. It was only Xiao Long. Even if the boy noticed something wrong, he wasn't likely to speak up about it. He didn't speak often, and when he did, he wasn't the type to press people much.
The dark-haired boy hesitated a bit before asking. But, seeing as neither he nor Takemaru were moving to go elsewhere, he brought himself to do it. It was odd to see the blond looking so distressed, which made him leery as well. "Is... something wrong?" he ventured cautiously.
Takemaru sighed deeply, his shoulders slumping again. "You powers can heal just about anything, right?"
Xiao Long's eyebrows furrowed as he frowned, pondering the question. Why was Takemaru asking this? What sort of answer was he expecting? The boy had already seen all his abilities first-hand.
The silence was taking too long for Takemaru, his mind still distraught from that scene. When he couldn't take it anymore, he finally spoke up without waiting for Xiao Long's answer.
"What about a heart break?" The portion of his mind that was still capable of coherent thought nagged that this was a bad idea, but that part wasn't in charge, unfortunately. But Takemaru had always been impulsive, acting without thinking, and common sense wasn't going to magically appear to him now. The instant the words left his mouth, Xiao Long's expression turned to a mixture of surprise and confusion. "Never mind. I..."
It was probably the single most thoughtless thing he had ever done in his life, but he couldn't stop it. He found himself distracted by the way Xiao Long's lips quivered as he searched for the proper words to say, found himself considering the way Ayano and Kakeru had kissed, and thinking about how badly he had wanted that. How soft Xiao Long's lips looked, just like Kakeru's...
He swooped in without warning, surprising even himself with the brashness of the motion. Xiao Long's lips were as soft as they looked, and felt warm and comfortable and reassuring against his own, much the way he had imagined kissing Kakeru would feel like, until the smaller boy gasped in shock. Then Takemaru came back to his senses and pulled away as quickly as possible, turning his head in an attempt to hide the fierce red blush taking over his face. He tried to mumble an apology, but the words choked up in his throat.
Xiao Long stumbled back a step, his fingers instantly flying to his mouth, and his face was almost as flushed as Takemaru's. "Never... I mean... I thought my first kiss would be... for a girl..." When Xiao Long spoke, his Chinese accent emerged heavily and he was struggling to form words. Another aching pang shot through Takemaru, adding guilt and embarrassment to the hurt already present.
"I-I'm sorry," he managed to spit out finally, his voice having transformed itself into a scared, high-pitched squeak. Right now, he was finding roughly the same amount of pleasure in speaking as he would have in puking. In a way, it was much the same situation, because the words wouldn't stop tumbling from his mouth and he realized what an idiot – what a fucking inconsiderate idiot – he must sound like, but he couldn't stop them. "I just wanted to find out what it was like, and... and it wasn't that bad, was it?"
Xiao Long surprised him with how quickly he regained his composure. He looked like he wanted to be sick, with his hand pressed against his mouth like that, but in a matter of seconds he had eased down and almost managed to relax again. If he weren't gifted with enough powers already, he also had this ability; an ability Takemaru found himself envying, because he could still feel the fire in his face getting warmer.
"You saw Ayano and Kakeru together?" Xiao Long questioned gently.
"Th-that's not... I'm not–"
"It's okay," Xiao Long hushed him. "I understand."
Then, to add the day's list of unexpected events, the petit Chinese boy grabbed his shirt collar and pulled him into another kiss.
"Let's find out if your heart break can be healed..."