Title: What About Now (1/1)
Author: youngerdrgrey
Pairing: Addison/Derek friendship; talks of Meredith/Derek, Derek/Addison
Summary: Derek offers Addison a solution to her problems
Rating: T
Warnings/Spoilers: Post-7x18 for Grey's & 4x18 for Private Practice. Before their respective finales though.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. All rights for the characters and the world go to their owners (like Shonda Rhimes and ABC). I, in no way, believe ā€“ or would lead others to believe ā€“ that I own Grey's Anatomy. I am merely a fan of the television show who has ideas for things that Shonda could do/could've done.

Author's Note: Please review if you read.


Meredith died.

No, really, that is the first thought in her head when she sees the look on his face. Why else would he be giving her the McDreamy eyes that make girls just want to rip their clothes off and screw him into oblivion? Derek loves Meredith. He one hundred percent loves that twisty, slightly suicidal, lost woman. Yet, he kisses Addison.

The bit of stubble that he calls a mustache scratches against the top of her lip. It's gruff, but the kiss itself is sweet and simple. Like something they could do in their sleep. It should be, after years of being married. Still, they've gone years without doing it as well.

Feeling his lips back on hers makes her wonder how everything ended out the way it did. They didn't always make each other miserable. They were great for each other for years. Addison used to be the happiest person in the room because of Derek. Then, one day, there was just nothing. Nothing to make her smile. Nothing to keep her from sleeping with the always flirtatious and inhumanly attractive Mark Sloan. Nothing to stop him from running off to Seattle and meeting Meredith.

She halts. He does too. Onto his lips, she asks, "What are we doing?"

He opens his eyes. Stares right through her. Really looks at her. Then he shrugs. It's such a Derek thing to do that she wants to laugh. She sees something though, like he knows exactly what he is doing and has a reason. She wants to know what it is. One of their close friends is recovering from serious brain injuries, a baby is in the NICU, his wife is breaking down in elevators, and he has to be doing this for a reason. He leans in again. She scoots back.

"No, Derek," she says, "You have Meredith."

"I want you, Addison," he says. "Iā€¦ I want you. I want you to smile, to laugh, to stutter the first letter of my name because that's all you can get out. I want you to be happy."

How is she supposed to be happy when she's taking away the only person who keeps Meredith alive? She doesn't need a guy to be happy. She needs a baby. She-oh. Please tell her that he isn't doing what she thinks he's doing.

"Derek, what are you doing?" she asks.

"I talked to Amelia, and she says that you want a baby. She also wants a niece that isn't crazy, so she told me to ask. I thought the words would bog things down," he says.

They do. The words really do because now her head is cloudy and all she can see is a picture of Amelia that should be stabbed with a dart.

"Amelia asked you to-to ask me-about a baby? Derek, you-"

He interrupts, "Addison, I'm not doing this because of Amelia. I'm doing this for you, with you, if you want."

If she wants. She wants all right. For years, all she's wanted was to have Derek's baby. She aborted Mark's kid to have Derek's. But they were married then. They were involved. They don't even live in the same state anymore. How would it work?

"Meredith and I are adopting," Derek tells her, "And, uh, I asked her if I could try with you. It's not for us, Meredith and me. This baby is for you. Think of it as a thank you."

"For what? I think you've done more for me than any cheated on spouse should ever do," Addison admits.

"Very true, but if it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have met Meredith. I would have never gone to Seattle. I'd still like ferry boats. I wouldn't be me. So, let me give you your dream, Addie."