A/N: I decided to try my hand at the 100 Themes Challenge on Sheezy that a friend of mine linked me to. Instead of doing all 100 on one pairing, I decided to split them into three separate stories, each with 33 drabbles. Some drabbles will be connected, others not. The other two stories will be SuperboyxAqualad and SuperboyxKid Flash. I will try to update once every week or so. You have noticed that leaves 1 drabble. You can go to my page and vote in the poll for which pairing gets that drabble. Now on with the story.
Drabble Genre: Humor
Pairing(s) For This Drabble: Superdick
The moment Miss Martian met Superboy it was as if the entire universe had plotted to get them together. Robin was unfortunately well aware of it. He just didn't see why. He didn't have anything against Megan. She was nice, even if her catchphrase of "HELLO MEGAN" was enough to make anyone cringe. She and Superboy didn't have much in common at all. Okay, so they both didn't know that much about Earth customs. And she was an alien and he was the clone of an alien. And she was the first one to get him to actually grin. And they both lived at Mount Justice together. It was obvious really, that they would end up together.
It made Robin want to vomit. He didn't like Superboy paying attention to her instead of him. What he didn't know was why he didn't like it.
It had been Batman's idea. So far, Superman was showing no interest in getting to know his clone, and so Bruce thought that it would help Superboy, and thus the rest of the team, if the reticent young man got friends. He encouraged Robin to start spending more time with him, and it was a pleasant surprise for the thirteen year old to find that he enjoyed being around Superboy.
Maybe a bit too much. But he was just being a good friend, right? Right.
Sure, Superboy could be strange. Robin clearly remembered the taller boy giving him a box of worms. Gross, but the clone, while trying to hide his expression, just looked so shyly hopeful that he couldn't refuse, even though he was slightly horrified. Still, it was the thought that counts, right?
Robin didn't mean for it to happen. To be fair, he hadn't been expecting it in the least. In fact, there was no reason for the possibility to even cross his mind, let alone set up precautions to make sure it didn't happen. Not only that, but he didn't even recognize it for what it was at first.
The members of Young Justice were in the training room. So far Megan had fought with Kaldur with the Atlantean winning. Next were Kid Flash and Artemis. The Archer won, resulting in an embarrassed and ticked off speedster. And finally Superboy and Robin. There they were, in their fighting stances, just a few seconds away from starting. Those few seconds were the cause of Robin's downfall.
It was then that the shorter boy suddenly mused how nice it would be if Superboy's eyes, now fierce and focused, gazed at him with a softer look. How damn aster he looked without his shirt, and how astrous it would feel to have those strong arms wrap around him and hold him tight; to feel that strong heartbeat. How soft yet strong the clone's lips looked, and how much he'd like to kiss them to see if they really were. And it was during those few seconds that realization hit Robin with the strength of ten supermen.
He was in love with Superboy.
Shocked, he was not prepared for Superboy's blow, and he barely heard the computerized words: "Robin: Fail." He didn't get up right away, and Superboy stepped over, and that very slight concern flickering in his oh so blue eyes made Robin's mouth run dry. He couldn't even make out what Superboy asked him, and had no idea what tumbled out of his own mouth, only that the taller boy nodded and backed away, and he eventually got up.
It made sense to him now. It fit perfectly. Why every time Superboy would give him the tiniest smile, he'd grin like an idiot. Why every time Superboy got close, his heart would feel like it was going to burst of out his chest. Why he wanted Superboy's attention, and would feel annoyed when Artemis or Megan would flirt with him.
Instead of being elated by this revelation, Robin was lated. He tried to reason with himself. He was thirteen. He wasn't supposed to have a grasp on real love. It was just a crush at most, or hormones were beginning to creep in, or it was some weird Kryptonian pheromone Superboy was giving off, because there was no way he was in love with his older, male teammate.
He tried to deny his feelings. He was going overboard. Of course he didn't love Superboy. That was silly. Okay, so looking at the older boy's eyes made his spine tingle in a good way. Big deal. And so Robin would steal his shirts and sleep with them. They smelled good, okay? And he couldn't find anything that smelled like him. And sure, he'd go toe to toe with Batman whenever the other would make comments Superboy that possibly had a vague chance of being offensive. That's what friends do, right? And so what if he had a whole shoebox filled with pictures of the Teen of Steel? He wasn't showing stalkerish tendencies. Superboy was just extremely photogenic. Thus there was nothing strange with going through all of them before he went to bed each night. Robin didn't really comprehend just exactly how far gone he was until he was in Superboy's bathroom and nuzzling one of Superboy's bath towels.
He tried several ways to 'snap out of it'. When there were no missions, Robin once attempted to spend less time with the clone, a la spending time in his own room studying strategies. He cracked in less than an hour. He couldn't handle the withdrawal. Sure, he could go on missions and stuff without him, but when there was nothing up and he had the choice to be with him, he sure as hell wasn't going to pass it up. Time to scratch that method off the list.
And so he started paying extra attention to girls, members of Young Justice along with civilians. Maybe he could kick his Superboy habit. But no matter how many girls he looked at, they didn't seem right. Alright, so maybe he's gay. However, none of the boys he saw made him feel like Superboy did. It was like the older boy was a drug he couldn't stop taking.
Then he thought that if Superboy actually hooked up with someone else, then the feelings would just die, or be revealed as just very platonic feelings. So he gave Artemis a go ahead, and thus the Archer flirted with Superboy, standing very close to him and touching his arms and muscled torso. Cue Robin 'accidentally' throwing a batarang at her.
Finally, he decided to take a good look at Superboy's flaws. Surely that would turn him off, right? Superboy was clueless, arrogant, brooding, hotheaded, violent, and way too obsessed with Superman. And there was that time that Superboy put all of Robin's shoes on the top shelf where there was no way the short bird could reach them. There. Really, Superboy was not appealing.
Superboy had grown up in the Cadmus pod, where Superman was about the single most important person to him; the only person he grew up knowing that he thought wouldn't treat him like an experiment, like something wrong. And then Superman turned his back on him. He was arrogant because his claims of power, of being the Superboy, were so important to him, because without that, he had no identity at all. He didn't even have a name. He wasn't so much brooding as insecure, afraid to join up or get close for fear of rejection, and when he did try, he was lost at how to go about it. Hotheaded? Was that really that big a deal? A lot of heroes were hotheaded. And he wasn't so much clueless as just confused. Not to mention he made the cutest face, like a little sad and confused puppy.
And really, was the shoe episode that big of a deal?
This was ridiculous. He was completely biased in Superboy's favor. Why? Because he was addicted to him. He really was. Every time Superboy was around, he thought this must be what drugs feel like, and he wanted more and more of that high. There had to be something wrong with him, else why did being near Superboy feel so damn good?
He sighed as he turned his head, only to jump slightly when he saw blue eyes up close and staring into his own. Lifting his head off the table, he stared at Superboy who was straightening up from his leaned over position. Once again, there was some concern in his eyes, and Robin's heart refused to slow down. In the back of his mind, a little voice told him Batman would chew him out for letting someone sneak up on him like that, especially someone with far less training. Robin chose to ignore it.
Instead, Robin directed his attention to what he should have noticed beforehand. "Uh Supes? Go for a swim?" he questioned with a smirk. The clone's clothes were drenched and showing off every shape and curve of his toned body. Robin certainly wasn't complaining.
Superboy tensed, as though he was steeling himself for something, and then reached into a bulging pocket and took out a sea slug, presenting it to Robin.
Mortified, Robin managed to say thanks and hesitantly took the slug. A shiver of disgust ran up his spine. "I think your friend will be happier back out in the ocean." He stood up, holding the sea slug out as far away from him as he could as he left to return the 'gift'.
Superboy was so childlike at times. Like a little boy showing little creatures to his parents. Robin sighed. If only Superboy had brought him flowers spurred by feelings more than platonic. Not that Robin wouldn't be embarrassed by that, but it would be the thought behind it.
Oh well, at least he had footage of his crush sleeping to help ease the hurt.
Superboy stared as Robin left, disappointed welling inside. A slim green hand touched his shoulder.
"Don't worry, Superboy," she said softly, trying to comfort him.
The clone just grunted and headed for his room with defeat showing in the slump of his shoulders, M'gann staring after him worriedly. But she would continue helping her friend and crush, no matter what.
Although maybe she should ask Uncle J'onn some questions first. Maybe there was a massive difference in Earth and Martian courtship rituals after all.
Because you all know bats show their love by stalking. And for this drabble, Martians by boxes of worms, moving your shoes, and giving you sea slugs.