Chapter Six: The Hearts of Itsuki Koizumi and Kyon
"I loved it," I blatantly lied to Haruhi.
"What? Really?" Haruhi jumped up and grinned…then she quickly frowned. "Are you lying to me?"
"About something like this? Of course not."
Haruhi returned her smile. "Ha! That's awesome! What was your favorite part?"
"Um, I'm not sure…but I know what my least favorite part was."
"Huh, what is that?"
"When Koi—I mean Kageyama got really sick. I was hoping he wouldn't die at the end."
"Oh, I know! I was so into it! 'Cause if he died, I was going to be really upset! Kogami would have been so lonely!"
I hate how this is so ridiculously parallel to Koizumi and me…except maybe that last part about being lonely.
"But he didn't die…so I was glad."
"Yep, no more suffering for Kageyama! So he and Kogami can be together forever!"
"Um, well, maybe I wouldn't go that far."
Haruhi stopped cheering. "Huh?"
"Well, I mean, all things come to an end, right?"
"No matter what, Kogami and Kageyama will always be friends."
"What are you implying?" There was her trademark upside-down V mouth.
"That maybe you should take a break from your doujinshi world and come back to our SOS Brigade meetings. Don't you realize that, uh…we haven't looked for any time travelers and such recently? One may have shown up and we wouldn't have even noticed."
Haruhi's eyes widened. "Oh my gosh, you're right! I've been slacking!"
"I'll have to look into that. We'll make plans to go out look this weekend."
Yay. That was definite sarcasm.
As much I normally despised this sort of thing, as in anything involving Haruhi, I was actually kinda glad to be able to snap Haruhi out of this doujinshi phase. Now I didn't have to put up with Koizumi all the time, since his chest pains should be gone now.
Also, and most important, Koizumi should now be out of love with me.
I didn't get any time alone with Koizumi to ask him some questions until after Haruhi's obnoxious SOS Brigade meeting. Ugh, I don't feel like going into the details of the meeting. Mostly just the usual rambling, except that we now have to work harder to make up for the time we lost not looking for the espers and the like. Sheesh.
"So, Koizumi…feel any different?" I asked when we finally left the school.
"It was Haruhi, wasn't it?"
That surprised me. "You know?"
"Not exactly at first, but it seemed unusual. It was the doujinshi, I imagine?"
"Yes. She grew a huge liking to Takahashi Kogami no Kokoro, which explains the chest pains."
"Wait, did you actually read the doujinshi?"
"I figured I'd make sure it was her causing this…"
Koizumi looked at me with astonishment. "…You did this…for me?"
"Look, I only did it so I didn't have to put up with seeing you all the damn time! I think seeing you at the Brigade meetings is sometimes too much. Plus all that weird I love you crap should be over with."
"Huh?" Koizumi stopped walking.
"I was just talking about the chest pains."
"I was…talking…about…" Wait, what does that mean?
"Kyon…" Koizumi stepped closer to me, a look of hurt in his eyes. "Suzumiya only altered my heart the organ, not the feeling. I'm…still in love with you…"
"…" I must have looked really stupid with my mouth hanging slightly open. It wasn't wide open, but I was sure he could see the shock in my face.
"I'm sorry, Kyon…I'm really glad you helped me out and stuck by my side so I wouldn't get hurt, but…" Koizumi tilted his head down so that his bangs shielded his eyes from view. Was he that upset that I was surprised when he said that?
"Koizumi…I didn't mean-"
"…Never mind, Kyon…" he said in the most upsetting tone I had ever heard him speak. Without even glancing up at me, he spun around and walked off in the opposite direction.
…What in the hell do I do now?
So all this time, Koizumi was really in love with me. The only thing Haruhi unknowingly contributed to was his burning chest pains.
And now Koizumi was upset. I made it apparent that I very much disliked the fact that he was in love with me, and I think this time more than any other…
I really hurt him.
I mean, I wrote his love for me off as something Haruhi thought up.
If anything, I wouldn't even give a rat's ass about how Koizumi felt, but now…it seems like a different story. The one person who told me he loved me…and I hurt him.
How did I really feel about Koizumi? Was I really that annoyed of him? Or was he right when he said I portrayed my annoyance for him only to hide the fact that I really didn't mind him?
…Or was it something else altogether?
"Koizumi…" I approached him after our meeting after school the next day, once Haruhi finally trotted off.
"Y-yes, Kyon?" he stuttered.
"Can we talk?"
We didn't speak again until we were outside of the school.
"Koizumi, I spent some time last night thinking about things."
"Things? As in…?"
"Well, maybe not things so much as…you…"
I noticed Koizumi's cheeks flush to red. "M-me?"
"I'm sorry about yesterday. I didn't mean to make it sound like Haruhi invented your love for me like she did for your chest pains."
"I understand. That had been what you had expected, that I wouldn't be in love you after you altered Suzumiya's mind back to normal. Or what normal should be defined as to her."
"…It just wasn't something I ever expected from you. Or anyone, for that matter."
"Don't be sorry! I guess if you love someone, you can't help how you really feel."
"So true…" Koizumi glanced up at the sky, which I just now noticed was flooded with dark rain clouds.
"So…what is it you even like about me?" I had to ask.
"Maybe everything," he smiled at me.
"Even if I were to say I disliked you very much?"
"But I don't believe that."
"…Maybe you're right."
"Argh! Watch it-!" a raindrop gazed my cheek.
"Uh-oh, looks like the rain's starting." Koizumi held his hand out.
"Dammit, I left my umbrella at home!"
Then a black umbrella was held out in front of me by Koizumi. He opened it up and handed it to me. "Here."
"Uh, thanks," I grabbed the handle. "Don't you want to use it?"
"I will," he leaned in closer to me, shielding himself under the umbrella by the rain, "with you."
My face rose in temperature. "W-whatever…"
"Is Kyon embarrassed?"
"Why refer to me like that? I'm right here!"
Koizumi then placed his hand over my right hand, which was holding up the umbrella…Wait, what?
"Tch! You're seriously testing me!"
"Kyon…" he then proceeded to stare at me as we walked.
"Do you like me?"
…What? Was Koizumi really just blatantly asking me that? Is he, like, high or something?
"Are you under the influence of something I should know about?" I decided to ask.
"Hmm, not really," he grinned. What was that supposed to mean?
"Ergh…" This just gets weirder and weirder…
And why the hell is his hand still on top of mine? I am perfectly capable of holding the umbrella up myself, thank you. But I didn't say that out loud. Kinda like when we were in the restaurant and his hand was conveniently on top of mine.
Why am I allowing this?
"So, altogether you've been saying that you've been thinking about me, right?" he asked curiously. "More than…Asahina, perhaps?"
"Ugh, yeah right. You wish."
"Care to elaborate?"
"Elaborate what? No?"
"Aww, are you embarrassed?"
"…Koizumi, I may just consider punching you…"
He just continued to smile the rest of the way. With his hand still overlapping mine.
…Several days passed.
Haruhi was completely past her doujinshi phase, thank God. Oh well, my bad, Haruhi might be God herself. Geez. Anyway, so now Koizumi was chest-pain free. Um, well, I guess if you don't count any time his heart jumps when he sees me.
Yes, Koizumi is still in love with me. Sure it was odd at first, but now I just looked at it like "sure, he loves me."
Am I annoyed with him? Not so much. His teasing attitude towards me has actually made me realize some things. Plus I talk to him more than any of the other Brigade members, so putting up with him eventually was nearly inevitable.
…Wait, now I know what you might be thinking: What things did Koizumi make Kyon realize?
"K-Koizumi…" I scratched my chin. We were on our way home together that next Friday.
"Why don't we, um, go to lunch together tomorrow? I mean, if you're not busy…"
Koizumi paused to look at me.
"W-what?" I said.
Koizumi then presented me with a smile brighter than the sun. "Of course, Kyon."
I couldn't help myself; I returned the smile.
Apparently that gave Koizumi some kinda signal to grab my hand.
"Eh?" my heart jumped.
"Do you mind me doing so?"
I turned my head, noticing my cheeks were burning. "I-I don't care…"
His fingers were now intertwined with mine. "There's the dere-dere."
"You're still on that?"
"You act so tsundere; I can't help but to say something about it."
"I think it's cute."
Koizumi chuckled. "Hey, Kyon."
"I love you."
"Yeah? Well, I kinda, maybe, sorta, uh…like you, uh, too…"
"It's okay. That's all I can ask for.
…Koizumi made me realize that love really does hit you when you least expect it…
Just for anyone that was curious, the doujinshi Haruhi was reading, Takahashi Kogami no Yuutsu, comes from the name Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuutsu, the original Japanese name for The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya. Her favorite doujinshi, titled Takahashi Kogami no Kokoro, is Japanese for The Heart of Kogami Takahashi. Fitting, huh?