Yes, no, maybe, I don't knowCan you repeat the question?

You're not the boss of me nowYou're not the boss of me nowYou're not the boss of me now, and you're not so bigYou're not the boss of me nowYou're not the boss of me nowYou're not the boss of me now, and you're not so big

Life if unfair

Malcolm was sitting in the truck that his mother won in a contest five years earlier. As the truck moved, he looked at you through one of the rolled down windows and spoke.

"A lot has happened in the five years since I graduated from high school. We got a new baby brother four years ago named John, so Jamie's no longer the youngest. Dad got a vasectomy after that. Craig got to be the godfather. By the way, Craig is now our uncle. He is married to Aunt Susan, and they have a three-year-old son named Peter Stanley Feldspar. Yeah. Craig's a Marvel fan. They're in the car behind us. Francis and Piama are also in another car so that we can avoid arguments. Mom found out a while ago that Francis has a job. Reese has had some adventures as the high school janitor. I have done a lot of work in college, and I'm still striving towards the future that Mom expects me to have. Dewey got a scholarship. He's going to a great music school in New York City and will probably play at Carnegie Hall. Since he graduated last week, we've been on this family road trip to nowhere."

"Do you even know where we're going, Hal?" Lois asked.

"Of course I know where we're going," Hal said. "We're somewhere in Indiana that has a lot of corn."

They heard a crow kaw as they drove by fields of crops.

"We're in the middle of nowhere," Lois said.

"Don't worry," Hal said. "I'm sure we'll find a place to stay."

Minutes later, they drove into a town called Orson.

"This place looks like it sucks," Reese said.

"Quiet, Reese!" Lois said.

"Strange things are bound to happen during summertime," Frankie narrated. "During this particular summer, we learned a bit more about hospitality."

Someone knocked on the door of the Heck house.

"Mom!" Axl yelled as he sat on the living room couch in his boxers. "Someone's at the door! It's so annoying!"

Frankie walked through the living room and answered the door. She saw Lois and Hal.

"Hello," Lois said. "I'm Lois and this is Hal."

"Hi," Frankie said. "Is this about a bake sale? Because I heard nothing about it. I swear."

"Actually, we're not from this town," Lois said. "We're from…"

"That doesn't matter," Hal said. "What matters is this. We don't have enough money to stay anywhere today. We're on a tight-budgeted family road trip. We were wondering if it wouldn't be any trouble for us to stay here."

"We'll understand if you don't normally let guests stay," Lois said.

"No. Actually, we've had guests. We had a Japanese foreign exchange student here last October. How many of you are there?"

"That's a good question," Hal said awkwardly, turning back to look at the cars. "There's our six sons, our daughter-in-law…"

"My sister, her husband, and their son," Lois added.

"That makes a dozen guests," Frankie said with a fake smile. "Well, bring everyone in! My name is Frankie Heck, by the way."

Hal and Lois signaled for the others to enter the house. Malcolm, Dewey, Reese, Jamie, John, Francis, Piama, Craig, Susan, and Peter entered. Frankie led all of them to the kitchen where her youngest son Brick was reading a book. When Brick was finished reading, he closed the book and looked up. The amount of people in the room surprised him.

"Wow. How long was I reading?"

"These are guests, Brick. They're gonna be staying with us for…a little while."

"Just a day," Lois said.

"So, look around and help yourselves to what you'd like to eat," Frankie said.

"His name is Brick?" Malcolm whispered to Dewey.

"It's better than Malcolm," Dewey said.

"Who are all these people?" Mike asked his wife.

Frankie brought Mike to the living room.

"They were having a family road trip and needed a place to stay, Mike."

"Frankie, we can't house these people for a day. We can't afford it. Why are you doing this?"

"I don't know. Something about them reminds me of…our family."

Reese left the kitchen and sat next to Axl.

"You like sitting on the couch in your underwear?" Reese asked.

"Yeah," Axl answered. "Got a problem?"

"No. I enjoy doing the same thing."

"It's awesome, right?"


Brick went upstairs and came back down with another book. Malcolm walked over to him.

"You like to read a lot?" Malcolm asked.

"Yes. The stories and the fonts that the authors use are very interesting."

"So you're pretty smart?"

"I guess."

"Listen to me. Stop acting smart! You have to act normal. If teachers see how smart you are, then you'll be forced to join the Krelboyne class!"

"What's that?"

"You don't wanna find out. Just stop acting too smart. Trust me."

Brick looked worried. At that moment, Sue came out of her room.

"I'm finally gonna eat my chocolate chip muffin!" she said excitedly.

She didn't even acknowledge the guests who were in the house. She ran into the kitchen and opened the fridge. The muffin was not there.

"Where's my chocolate chip muffin?" she asked.

"That was yours?" Craig asked. "Sorry. I ate it."

Sue looked like she was trying to piece it together in her head.

"You ate my chocolate chip muffin? Mom!"

Frankie brought Sue out of the kitchen.

"Who are they?" Sue asked.

"They are guests," Frankie said.

"One of them ate my chocolate chip muffin! I want them to leave."

Sue walked away. Frankie looked at the family with a worried look on her face.

"Just a few minutes of having guests over," Frankie narrated, "and we already have a problem."