A/N: I never do A/Ns, except for this time to say this fact: Astrid Lindgren's books have become more popular in USSR than in USA, so if you don't know who she is, look it up.

Set around Cave's and Caroline's childhood, before Aperture Science was founded.


Caroline-on-the-Roof

She had been a clever girl.

Caroline Whoever had an affection for science, her parents joked, ever since she was born. When the Great Depression started, Caroline's parents lost job, and enthusiasm, but not her: she would always think of ways to help humanity with science. Even though electricity only started to seriously affect people's lives by then, losing it was sign of a worse tomorrow, which, combined with Caroline's curiosity, led her to quite literally joining all the potatoes in the fields next to her house by electric wires and supporting her family with electricity for good.

However the next time her curiosity took hold (eventually quite literally turning her into a crazy artificial intelligence in a facility where science meant everything) her parents would remember all the time. Once Caroline read about the airplane, which also hadn't gained popularity by her childhood, and took interest so madly she started working on her (at the time) greatest project. She hot-glued most of metal scraps in her room to what looked like helicopter's rotor, bought a generator from the money that her family had saved from not having to deal with electricity bills any more, and attached it to another plethora of potatoes. It took quite a time for her to do that, so her mother would constantly ask:

"What is this, sweetheart?"

"It's all for science, mom," young Caroline would always reply.

But all the preparations only last for a finite time, and Caroline's helicopter eventually saw a day when it was finished and ready for its first flight. She brought her project to the outside, ready for the first flight, only to have their parents to look at her with a weird-looking face, constantly asking:

"What the hell is that thing anyway? It's probably not even going to work!"

But they already knew they had lost Caroline for forever. She started up the thing, flew up into the air, and shouted:

"Okay, look. We both said a lot of things that you are going to regret. But I think we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monsters."

No one from her family ever saw her again.

Once up in the air, Caroline first decided to fly to her school. It was a science fair this day, and she didn't want to miss the show. At one point she thought she would be late, but then – who cares about being late when you can just fly over the houses in the neighborhood and amuse them?

All said and done, she eventually made it to the school. The teachers, looking through the window, almost dropped their jaws thinking: "So that flying girl is actually coming to the fair?"

"Her parents MUST have helped her in this crazy project."

"She gets the first place. No more words or thoughts."

"Well maybe except – who is she?"

"Who, who… Do you know who is a science prodigy in our school or not?"

"Caroline… Caroline… Just let me to remember her last name… Whatever."

"Whoever. Well, whatever, she is the first prize winner."

"She was already the first prize winner ever since she started participating in the science fair-"

"SHUT. UP."

"Hey, at least you got a picture of whatever, or, as you like to say, whoever she is doing?"

"No?"

"NO? SERIOUSLY?"

"Why that would be important anyway?"

"Hey, look, the geek's hell copter has broken down. YOU GET WHY IS THAT IMPORTANT? YOU GET IT?"

Just as they said that, Caroline almost crashed into the school window. Some minor damage happened to her, but not really anything else.

"Hey, look, you get the first prize. But seriously? Do your parents help you with that?"

"No, they-re-"

"That's it. We're going to their house. Because we like the truth."

They started walking through the city. The people in the city would nag them:

"Hey, that's the flying girl! Sign here-"

"We are perfectly sure that her parents are in fact flying, and she is simply their hostage on the science fair."

Just as they reported that, a strong wind started blowing, starting up the rotor once again and getting the little Caroline into the air.

"Hey! Satan! Go down! We still have to figure out your first prize's legitimacy!"

However, as it always happens in cartoons, the more the evil guys shouted at the little girl, the stronger the wind started blowing, eventually getting her out of their sight.

"At least she saw her own demise. No one will find her since this science project."

"Heh heh heh. Whoever made it will pay for their own mistakes."


Meanwhile, on the other side of the Great Lakes, Cave Johnson's life wasn't as scientific. He grew up on a rich family, and so was taught to never trust any people. Due to his family's richness, he would be much hated, and him giving one hundred dollars to every of his haters wouldn't help either.

One time he returned to his family after a crazy person almost shot him down, only to have his parents scold him:

"You know that every argument can be solved by money, not fists."

"The money wasn't enough."

"Then remember our motto: When money is not enough, use more money."

"Money doesn't bring happiness."

"Oh, yes it does. You only have to grow up and see for yourself."

"No, it doesn't!"

This once again sent Cave into a burst of tears, and he went to his room for probably a millionth time. He would probably never get used to the rules of human life. He looked down from the tenth floor (having which in houses was very rare at the time) at the people walking around. Everyone seemed to be happy. Save for him.

*bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt*

What the hell was that? Of all the saddening things that happened in life, that was probably the worst.

*spark*

*bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt*

No… It couldn't be…

Hello? Anyone in there? Could I land here? I'm running out of potato power and I really don't want to crash-land from the tenth floor!

Looking out of the window, he saw a long-haired teenager girl, much like him, with a helicopter-thingy on her head, in a white much dirty dress. He couldn't believe what he saw and opened the window, hoping that was just a picture on it, but it was real.

Then the said girl flew in through the window and almost-perfectly landed on her feet.

"What kind of insanity is that? A girl with technology way ahead of its time is the least I expected to see!"

"Take it calm. Let's talk. What's your name?"

"Mine?"

"Yeah, yours, not mine."

"I-I'm Cave, Cave Johnson. You?"

"Me? Ha ha. I am Caroline who lives on the roof! But you can just call me Caroline."

"Okay… Caroline?"

"Ugh, whatever. Where am I? Do you have a map of the States?"

"Why? Why would you need such a thing?"

"I've been through the same lakes over and over and I think I'm really lost, so…"

Her sight drew towards a map of the United States, conveniently placed on the wall.

"Okay. I'm from right here." She pointed at a city called "Cleveland", next to Lake Erie.

Cave was speechless. "Woah, that's far away."

"In the name of science," corrected Caroline.

"What IS with your obsession with science?"

"Okay, Cave, what is WRONG about science?"

"Nothing?"

"Precisely. Science can be cool and only cool."

Just as this replica echoed across the house, Cave's parents came into his room.

"Who are you talking to- What the hell is this girl doing here?"

"I'm Caroline Whoever-"

"What kind of crazy surname is that? You won't live with it forever, will you?"

"No?"

"Yeah. And where are you from?"

"Cleveland, Ohio?"

"THAT? THAT CRAZY HELLHOLE OF DOOM?" Whatever name Cave's father had picked up a phone from the wall and put in some numbers. "Hello? Cleveland administration?"

"Yes, we are. Have you found Caroline-"

"Yes we found your goddamn Caroline. And? Do you expect her to return to your crazy hellhole of doom making everyone poor?"

"Yes-"

"No." The phone hung up. "Okay listen, Caroline, from now on you're going to live here. With Cave. I'm setting up a plan as I'm speaking. You're living with Cave, and wait. That hell of a copter wasn't standing here. You made it yourself, right?"

"Yeah. In the name of science."

"Hm. Never heard of a scientist girl. You know what, then we're going to send you and Cave out, and you will found a science company, I don't know how they are called these days, and then everything in your life is going to be JUST. FINE."

Caroline only thought: "There never was a crazier man in the existence of mankind."

"Everything okay?"

"Maybe?"


Much time had passed since then. The Earth was already devoid of almost any humanity, Caroline's and Cave's childhood times were long over, and even their LIVES were long over.

Chell and Wheatley had found their way into the room which held a construct of majestic proportions, which somehow appeared to be a "she", only to see that she is turned off. However, as it always happens in video games, there was some crazy sequence of events accidentally turning "her" on, forcing Chell and Wheatley to have "her" speak the phrase once said to the people long forgotten.

Okay, look. We both said a lot of things that you are going to regret. But I think we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monster.


A/N: What the hell? I am doing this for a second time?

Oh yeah. Portal: Prelude Convention is on hiatus until I have the motivation to work for it, but I can tell you that AU No. 1 is going to revolve on the Morality Core being stuffed into ASCAIS or GLaDOS, whatever, instead of Caroline.