A/N: Yes, I'm back. Sort of. Okay, well I kind of have a summer job that takes up way more time than I could ever have imagined. And I'm also kind of cheating on House with another fandom (under a different username so you all don't get e-mails and get excited and then click on it and go wtf—this isn't house!). So between work and nonHouse writing and the Sims, which I've rediscovered, I don't really have much time. But since Housecards messaged me begging, I wrote down this idea that I had awhile ago. I don't know how often I'm going to be able to update, it's not going to be as long as Engagement or some of my other stories, and the chapters themselves are going to be rather short, but...well...it's something. And it's a little bit different from what I usually write too :-)
Summary: House/Wilson slash (eventually). On his way to lunch on what should have been a normal day, Wilson gets a life-changing shock. Takes place just before House had the brilliant idea to give himself untested drugs, so that and everything after that never happened. Before "After Hours," I read something that said someone (without mentioning who) was going to be a daddy. I know it turned out to be Taub (x2, the idiot), but at the time I thought about how fun it would be if it were Wilson. Just a warning, I worry that House might be a bit OOC in this story. I mean, really, it can't be any worse than what the season finale gave us, and I don't really know that he wouldn't act that way…but well you'll read it and judge for yourself, and if it's really that bad then I'm sorry and I hope you forgive me and enjoy the story anyway.
Wilson whistled as he signed his name and closed the file. It was Friday, finally, thank God, and for the first time he could remember he'd gone the entire week without losing any patients. There had been a scare on Wednesday with Veronica Ramsey, but thanks to an emergency hysterectomy, she'd pulled through. She was still under close observation and getting over the shock of never being able to have children, but at least the young woman was alive. Wilson had sat with her for a few hours last night, comforting her, talking to her about her options, and explaining to her that her chances for survival were greatly improved. She'd been one of the clingy ones, and had reminded Wilson quite a bit of Grace, but he knew nothing would happen. Not only had he sworn off seeing patients after the last disaster—she was too young for him anyway.
The whole incident did have him thinking about children again, though. The last time the subject had crossed his mind had been months ago, before Sam left, and he'd discussed it with her, though she hadn't exactly seemed interested.
For the longest time Wilson hadn't even known whether he wanted children or not. For the majority of his adult life Wilson had not had a stable home, nor enough time in his schedule to spend on a child. But he knew his time was running out. No, he wasn't a woman with a limited number of eggs; technically he'd have the ability to father a child until the day he died. But in order to become a father, he'd need to get married again, to a woman who not only wanted children but was still young enough to have them. That shouldn't be too hard, really; he'd always been able to attract younger women. Even his patient, Veronica Ramsey, was only twenty-nine and from the way she'd acted with him last night he was certain he could have an affair with her if he wanted to.
No, finding a woman wouldn't be a problem. Staying with a woman would be the problem. Sure, if they had a child soon enough they would be more likely to stay together for the child's sake, but they might be miserable together and Wilson didn't want that. He wanted a family, two parents and a child who loved each other and could actually love each other for more than a year or two. And even if Wilson managed to keep himself from cheating on his future baby mama, he didn't know how long he'd be able to remain happy with her. Being sort of in love with House didn't really help matters. Women could distract Wilson from his best friend and his attraction to him, certainly, and one of the reasons he'd been so anxious for Sam to stay was because she had been successfully doing just that. The problem was that the distraction never lasted. He always ended up growing bored with her and needing a new distraction. Which he found in the form of an affair. And when he couldn't stand being married to his wife anymore, he let her find out about the affair or just flat out told her. Before he knew it, he'd find himself alone again. So he turned to the one person that was always there, that always would be there because he didn't have it in him to leave: House.
Instead of using women to distract himself from his feelings for House, he'd use House to distract himself from his problems with the women. He was always happiest then; House could always make him feel better about his life than any woman could even if they shared nothing more than a deep friendship. He'd let himself grow closer and closer to House because he knew he wanted to and couldn't help himself...and then right when things seemed as though they were about to turn into something more than friendship, he'd bolt.
He wasn't ready to deal with everything that went with being in love with a male best friend. He probably never would be.
Wilson didn't know whether House had similar feelings for him—he'd never allowed himself to push far enough to find out. There were days when House said certain things or looked at him certain ways and Wilson was sure his best friend was in love with him. And then there were other days...House would do or say something that convinced Wilson that he was ridiculous, there was no way House could possibly have those kinds of feelings for him. And of course, there was the fact that House loved Cuddy.
Not that it mattered what House felt; even if his feelings were the same as Wilson's nothing would ever become of them. Wilson wouldn't let it. Besides, how did House come up anyway? Wilson hadn't even been thinking of him—he'd been thinking of having a child.
Could he? Could it ever work out with a woman long enough to have and raise a child?
Surely, having a child would help the relationship, wouldn't it? Wilson wouldn't need to distract himself with an affair because a child would provide as much of a distraction as anything. Even if he fell out of love with the woman he would never stop loving the child, of that Wilson was certain. He would throw everything he had into the well-being of the child. He would ensure he got a regular schedule at the hospital, that the child had plenty of love and attention. He would be there for soccer games and science fairs, he would help with math homework and give advice about girls or boys.
Yes, having a child would be able to keep Wilson from having to deal with his feelings for House and keep his home stable, wouldn't it?
But what if it didn't? What if, even with a child, everything still went wrong? What if Wilson still couldn't control himself and found himself cheating? What if it resulted in another messy divorce that left everyone feeling miserable? It wouldn't be fair to put a child through that, not if he could guess it was coming.
You're thinking too far ahead, Wilson told himself, shaking his head and straightening his files. You're not putting any children through anything. You're not even seeing anyone right now.
Of course, all this worry was ridiculous. Anything that would happen would happen one step at a time. He needed to meet someone first, and once he met someone he would need to see if she was interested in kids, and then they needed to fall in love enough that they wanted to get married. All of this would happen before Wilson even came anywhere close to having children. And surely, once he and a woman made it to the point where they were ready to get engaged, by then he should be able to determine whether or not they had a shot at having a stable home together. And if he thought they did have a shot, he would propose to her. If not, he would break up with her. And if they did decide to get married, there would be plenty of time to plan on having a family. This wasn't happening tomorrow.
Wilson felt reassured as he got up from his desk, stretched, and picked up his phone to page House for lunch. He would start making the effort to meet someone again...maybe he could ask out that cute new surgeon who'd kept smiling at him when she'd assisted with Veronica's hysterectomy the other day and congratulated him on the success afterward...she was certainly a possibility. Wilson put down his phone without paging House...he'd find her instead and maybe see if she was interested in grabbing a bite with him. He walked around his office desk and opened his door.
Standing in front of him, her hand poised in front of her as though to knock, a sigh in her face and so pregnant she looked as though she might give birth any second, stood Samantha Carr.