Title ;; Cancer
Rating ;; T
Summary ;; Matthew has been diagnosed with brain cancer, and the disease is terminal. This is the story of Matthew Williams, the boy that no one noticed him until he died.
The doctor's voice was drenched in sadness. Matthew's worries were coming true.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Williams, but you have cancer of the brain. You had a baseball-size tumor on your brain, and there's no way to treat it. We didn't find it early enough, and the tumor has grown and spread throughout your body. I'm sorry, but . . . there's nothing we can do."
How could this be happening? Why was it happening to him?
"H-how long do I have to l-live?" His mouth was dry; he could barely even speak or stand.
"I'd estimate about six months."
Six. Six months. That's all the time he had left.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Williams."
1st Stage :: Denial
"T-there's no way! This isn't happening to me. It can't happen to me. That doctor has no idea what he's talking about. I'm fine."
He was in denial. He was lying to himself. He just couldn't bring himself to believe the doctor's words. He couldn't have cancer. He felt fine . . . That was a lie, too.
He hadn't felt well in months. It all started with a headache that just wouldn't go away. He tried everything to ease the pain, but nothing worked. He had trouble seeing, even with his glasses on, and recently, he'd been vomiting at random points in time. When it was just the headaches, he thought nothing of it and worked through the pain. The blurred-eye vision caused him to worry, but he refused to go to the doctor. It was when he started regurgitating his meals he forced himself to go to the doctor.
He now wished he had gone earlier. But there was nothing he could do now but accept it, but he refused to do so.
"There's no way I have cancer. I'll be fine, just you wait."
2nd Stage :: Anger
There was a pressure in his stomach that would just not go away. It bubbled inside him, and the more he thought about it, the harder the pressure pushed on his stomach. He didn't know what the pressure was. But he had the urge to throw things against the wall. He had the urge to yell and scream until his throat was numb. He had the urge to destroy and break everything around him.
This pressure inside of him was anger. Matthew had never really dealt with extreme anger. Sure he had been pissed at Alfred for being an asshole and mad at everyone else who never noticed him, but the anger was never as extreme as this.
He didn't know how to handle it. He had been trying to hold it in, but now it was too much. He had to vent or break something, quick. So he picked up a glass, and threw it against the wall, watching it shatter into a million pieces.
It still wasn't enough. He wanted to blame someone, but no one else was there with him.
No one else even knew he had a terminal disease and that he was going to die in five months. He began to doubt no one would ever notice.
3rd Stage :: Barginning
"Please, I'll do anything to live for a little while longer."
It was pointless barginning with something that has already been decided, but Matthew couldn't help but do it. Why was God so cruel to him? Why did he have to die? What did he do that was so bad for him to die now?
"Please, let me live."
He didn't know who he was pleading to. Perhaps God, perhaps nobody. He just had the urge to plead for his life.
4th Stage :: Depression
He was just so sad. He was so weak. He now only had two months to live.
He lived in the hospital now. The doctor's had him stay there since he lived alone. They didn't want him to die and then have his deceased body rot in his house.
Matthew cried on a daily basis now. He was so sad and weak and lonely.
"Why do I even bother living now? Why are they keeping me alive? Just kill me already. Please."
That's all he wanted. But they just wouldn't do it. Instead, they made him suffer through the pain. They just sat there and watched him die. It made Matthew sick. Those digusting sadists. Do they enjoy watching a person die painfully slow?
A few months ago, Matthew would have been angry. But now . . . he thought there was no point in getting angry. It wasn't worth the energy.
After this, Matthew's blue eyes began to water. He couldn't help but cry . . . he was just so sad.
5th Stage :: Acceptance
He was ready. He was ready to move on to the next life.
"It's okay now. I can't fight this. I may as well prepare for it."
Matthew slept so much now. He'd wake up in the morning, and an hour later, he'd be fast asleep once again. He was preparing for his death. He didn't eat as much, and found it difficult to do anything but sleep and talk. He could barely even stand or walk. It was pitiful.
But Matthew finally accepted his fate. He was going to die this month, and he was ready for it. It was only a matter of time . . .
Matthew was litterly lying on his death bed. And as he layed there, he thought about his family. He never told them about his disease. He never mentioned it to Alfred. He never said anything to France or England or Prussia. He hadn't had contact with anyone in the past six months. He isolated himself for the past six months. He just couldn't tell them. It was too hard.
He knew they'd find out soon through. The hospital would call them, informing them of his death. That thought made him cry. He could picture it now. He saw tears in the eyes of his loved ones, and the looks of shock and despair plastered on their face. He sniffled and let the tears run down his cheeks.
"It's going to be okay. It's going to be okay."
He passed peacefully. Matthew passed away when he was sleeping. His pain and suffering were over. He could now move on to the next life.
Name: Matthew Williams
Time of Death: 3:23 a.m.
Cause of Death: Cancer of the Brain
Inspired by the song "Cancer" by My Chemical Romance
I'm rather pleased with how this chapter turned out.
As for the stages, there are five stages that most people go through when they have found out that they are going to die. The stages are listed above; Denial, Anger, Barginning, Depression, and Acceptance.
Next chapter should be up sometime this week ~