Dear Uzpiet,

To quote a famous Englishman on the subject of Christmas: Ba, humbug. At least the previous regeneration had Christmases full of alien invasions, death and chaos. His final Christmas was a masterpiece that took centuries of planning, from undoing the Time Lock to manipulating Wilf into the nuclear bolt chamber.

What have we seen from this one? A starcruiser nearly crashing and a WWIII pilot rescued. Small adventures provide small material for a tempter to use. If I had a mortal body, I would have vomited over your report—lemonade taps, hammocks, a forest in a box—and the undisguised "fun" they had with him there. Not to mention the sickeningly sweet ending.

Sincerely, Screwtape