My life is far from normal. Why, you ask? It's part of the story, I'll get to it.
Anyway, I'm as pop sensation -and also my friend- Chip says, an average kid that no one understands, with my mom and dad and Vicky always giving me commands. First things first, I AM a pretty average kid. Save the fact, of course, that my parent's are filthy rich workaholics who have no time for me and they have no idea that they have a fourteen year old homosexual for a son.
Yeah, that's right, I'm gay. I have been since I was ten and I realized that instead of staring at pretty girls, I would rather watch soap operas and watch the buff guys. I never told anybody, and no one suspects me, but in a town called Dimmsdale the people here aren't the brightest bulb in the box. But that isn't important. I've grown up a little bit since my soap opera days, and now I realize that I don't quite care for the huge muscles and bulging veins, but I found that I still like men.
Actually, it's more like one guy in specific...but that's for later.
So, you'd think 'oh hey, this kid's the normal teenage gay guy going through his coming out of the closet and dealing with it phase', but no. Oho, no. It's never that simple with me. Because, you see, I have Fairy Godparents.
Yeah, you read it right. I'll write it again for you, just to get the message across. I have Fairy Godparents. Just like the ones you read about when you were little, they grant wishes, have little wings, and bright shiny wands. I got them when I was ten, and no I'm not insane. The entire town has been victim of some of the romps I've gotten us into with some of my more thoughtless wishes, so that there is proof that I don't just see them. Anyway, back to how I got them, Fairy Godparents are assigned to children who are miserable. I gotta say, I was feeling pretty lousy back then. I was a ten year old kid who was struggling to understand not liking girls, a victim of my babysitter Vicky, and most of all just a little boy who missed his parents. Given I wasn't an orphan, like some unfortunate people out there, but I hardly saw my parent's regardless, and even when I did happen to get a glimpse of them neither one had any time for me.
So that's when they walked into my life. 'They' are Cosmo Cosma and Wanda Winkle-Cosma. They've been married for thousands of years, a stretch of time I can only imagine. Cosmo is more of the heart of the two, and Wanda is the brain. In a way, they're good for each other, being opposites; Cosmo makes Wanda have fun and Wanda keeps Cosmo's -and sometimes my- head from floating off into the clouds.
Even though they are my closest friends, and sometimes they even stand in as my parents and do a pretty damn good job at it, even they don't know that I'm gay. And dear lord, or even Jorgen von Strangle for that matter, I hope they never figure it out. Wanda probably wouldn't take it too badly, after all she married Cosmo and most people still thought he was pretty flamboyant, even after their union. It wasn't really their reactions I'm worried about, after all Cosmo loves almost everything and everyone until they -or it- hurt someone he loved. It's more of the...consequences of them finding out. They'd be a lot more suspicious of my actions. For a boy, I'm pretty damn touchy-feely, and I'll admit I love human contact more than I should, but it comforts me. I didn't get a lot of it as a kid. So now I'm making up for it in my teen years, I suppose, but in all honesty, there are only two people I really enjoy hugging or huddling up with.
Of course, Cosmo and Wanda. Who else would I have said? AJ and Chester are my friends and all, but they aren't big on the whole hug other guys thing, though they both overuse the phrase 'I love you.' And anyway, I'm used to snuggling with them because a lot of the time when I was little, they morphed into a green teddy bear with a pink ribbon for me to clutch as I slept. They both knew I was lonely. Actually, it was one of the main reasons they even got to know me anyway.
So anyway, that's pretty much my back story. I don't know much else to tell you, but if anything else comes up I'll let you know as soon as I remember.
Right now I'm actually home alone. Really alone though, no Vicky, no Mom or Dad, not even Cosmo or Wanda. My Godparents are actually at Fairy World to have some sort of discussion with Jorgen. About what, I don't know. I wasn't really listening to either of them. So I'm sitting at my desk, staring at my computer screen and literally almost squealing in delight at what I see on the screen. I might have abandoned my comic book and soap opera days, but I really only moved on to manga books and anime shows. Cosmo and Wanda don't really know how much I'm really into it though, since I try as best as I can to hide it in their presence due to the fact I watch and read shonen ai, and sometimes even full out yaoi. The more heavy stuff would certainly be awkward to explain if I was just caught, thats for sure. But right now one I'm reading one of my favorite manga series on my desktop, its about an almost human boy -he's got a demon inside him thanks to his evil excuse for a mother- falling for his neurotic grim reaper friend. They both struggle with their feelings because they both think it's equally wrong on both ends, and its just so adorably written out that I can't help but love it. Plus, it's made in a style that's easily relatable. Very easily relatable.
Ahem, anyway...I'm just getting to the point where they start to be more like a couple, and I swear the lack of oxygen to my brain and the nose bleeds are certainly not healthy for a growing boy. But I continued to read it anyway since it was getting to the juicy part. Plus, I definitely didn't want to end up having to explain a spontaneous nosebleed to Wanda if I read this later.
And boy, I was so sucked in that I didn't even hear the poof when Cosmo came into the room. I had both hands clasped under my chin and a goofy smile on my face from the manga, and when my Fairy Godfather crossed his arms over my shoulder and leaned on them it made me jump from my position.
"Hi Timmy! Whatcha readin'?" he chirped in my ear. I panicked, and fumbling with the mouse I made the window collapse before I spun around in my desk chair to face him, sending him into the air. Thankfully he was used to surprising me and simply crossed his legs in mid air, sitting himself down while floating.
"Cosmo, uh, what are you doing home? Where's Wanda?" I asked him, trying to take advantage of his short attention span so we could avoid my manga. He took the bait and giggled slightly before answering me.
"She and Juan were getting into it again, did you know they're really boring to listen to? And besides Timmy, I missed you, so I came back by myself! I don't think either of them noticed me leave." I felt my face flush as I unconsciously misconstrued his words. Stupid teenage hormones were really messing with my mind today, and I blame it on talking openly about my own homosexuality. I don't do it often. I turned myself back to my desk and began nervously ruffling through some of my schoolwork, I had a few questions on it anyway and it was the perfect subject change. School is always a neutral topic.
"O-oh, I see. Hey Cosmo, do you think you could help me with my geometry work? I don't remember the formula for this problem and I looked it up online, but I got two different answers so...," I trailed off, still trying to find the right worksheet. Pulling it out of the stack, I felt the green haired fairy flutter over my shoulder and peer onto the paper, emerald eyes scanning the problem my shaking hand pointed to. He hummed in thought for a moment.
"That one? Oh, that one's easy Timmy, you just take one half of the apothem times the perimeter. Do you remember how to find the apothem?" I offered him a sheepish smile and he grinned back at me, taking a pencil from my desk and showing me an example to find the piece of the formula. Yeah I know, Cosmo may seem kinda air headed, but he really does possess a whole lot of know how. He's very intelligent when push comes to shove. As he was explaining the math to me, his hands fluttering here and there while drawing me diagrams and writing out formulas, I got lost in listening to his voice. It was always the strangest thing to me, how he was thousands of years old, and yet his voice was still remarkably higher pitched than mine, even when I was at the age of ten. You would think with it being that high it'd be scratchy or raspy, but its not. In fact, it's one of the clearest tones I've ever heard. It's one of the oddest things about him, and that includes his bright green hair that clashes with his black brows.
I was pulled out of my thoughts about his voice when I felt his hand brush against mine as he slipped the writing utensil into my fingers. He was giving me that dumb smile again, and I felt my face flush too.
"Do you get it now Timmy?" he asked me, his voice filled with a youthful exuberance. Maybe that's why I loved him, he had a way of letting me feel my age again without all the burdens of life, but he also brought a sense of comfort to my life with his well timed and rare wisdom.
Oh, I didn't tell you that? Yeah, I hate to say it but I'm in love with my thousands of years old, different species, married Fairy Godfather. I guess I forgot to mention that, but I did say I'd tell you if I remembered right?
Yeah, maybe I should have mentioned that earlier...