Inspired by and written for Miss Reannan
P.S. I regret nothing….
"What do you mean you can't swim?" Dean was looking at Cas, eyebrow arched.
"I mean I can not swim Dean."
"You mean you can't or you just haven't"
They were standing side by side, looking out over a lake after banishing a pesky water sprite that'd been trying to drown holidaymakers.
"I mean I haven't but also, I can't."
"What about Jimmy?" Sam chimed in.
"Jimmy may have swum but the longer he is my vessel the less he…..exists."
"What about all those burgers when Famine hit town?" Dean asked.
"That was the last time I…experienced Jimmy."
"Huh." Sam said, because he couldn't think of anything else to say.
"Dude, you gotta be able to swim, what if you fell in the water or something?"
"Then I would make the water evaporate and walk out. Angels do not swim Dean." Cas turned and strode away.
"Angels don't swim?" Dean yelled after him, "Is that because of the wings? They're not water wings then huh?" Dean laughed at his own joke.
"Dean." Sam admonished.
"What? I think he should swim s'all. What if for some reason his Angel mojo was on the fritz and he fell in the drink. He'd drown. He'd sink like a feathery stone. Do you want Cas to sink like a feathery stone Sam?" Dean was on a role.
"Of course I don't want Cas to sink like a…but I think the chance of that happening is pretty unlikely."
"Ha. Unlikely, but not impossible!"
"I guess not impossible." Sam sighed. Boy when his brother got a hair-brained idea he really got a hair-brained idea!
"Right then, he should learn how to swim. Cas!" Dean yelled out, but Cas was gone. "Freakin' Angels, suck at saying goodbye." Dean muttered as he headed back to the car, Sam rolling his eyes behind him.
Dean walked into the motel room and dropped his keys on the bedside table.
"There you are. Where were you?" Sam asked.
"Out, getting supplies." Dean shrugged off his jacket and tossed a bag onto the bed.
"Supplies? I thought we were pretty stocked up, what we out of?" Sam got up walked over to the bed reaching for the bag to take a look.
Dean snatched the bag out of his hands. "Not those kind of supplies Sammy." He grinned.
Sam eyed his brother suspiciously. "What's in the bag Dean?"
Dean shook the contents on to the bed. There was a pair of red speedos and some floaties.
"What the….Dean, why did you buy swimming gear?"
"Because we're going to teach that Angel how to swim."
"Dean, if he doesn't want to…"
"Not a question of want Sammy boy, it's for his own safety." Dean looked at Sam and grinned, eyes dancing.
"Dean, he's not going to go for it. And speedos? Really? And what are they?"
"Floaties. We can't have him sinking first time out."
"Yes they are." Dean laughed. Sam couldn't help but join in.
"He's never going to do it." Sam said chuckling.
"I know, but it'll be worth it just to see him pull that I-have-no-idea-what's-going-on face of his." Dean said gleefully.
Sam shook his head.
Sam and Dean broke in to the local swimming complex.
"How are you going to get him here?" Sam asked as he flicked on the lights, illuminating an Olympic pool.
"I dunno, I'll adlib."
"This is, well it's pretty mean Dean." Sam said.
"I notice you're here." Dean replied, turning and looking at his brother.
"Yeah well…" Sam shrugged.
"Admit it. You wanna see him in the pink floaties as much as I do."
Sam chuckled. "I could do without the speedos though, if it's all the same with you."
Dean prayed for Cas. "Ahh Cas if you've got a minute, we've got another watery situation."
"The sprite came back?" Cas said, scaring Dean half out of his wits.
"Ummm, not exactly. Cas…Sam and I been thinkin'."
"Hey you can leave me out of this." Sam said throwing his hands in the air.
"Ok, I've been thinkin', it's time you learnt to swim Cas."
Cas looked confused.
Dean walked over to a chair and grabbed the bag containing his supplies.
"Here, this is for you." He handed the bag to Cas.
Cas looked inside. "I don't understand." He said gazing up, a baffled look on his face.
Dean glanced over his shoulder at Sam, grinned and nodded. Sam rolled his eyes.
Cas pulled the speedos out of the bag. "What are these?"
"They're speedos, it's what guys wear to swim in." Dean said, barely containing a smirk.
"And these?" Cas pulled out the floaties.
"Oh those are floaties, give them here, I'll show you how they work." Dean took the packet from Cas and pulled one of the floaties out. "You inflate them," he said muffled, as he blew one up. "See!" He showed Cas, who took it off him as Dean blew up the second floatie.
"Are they always pink?" Cas asked as he examined the strange inflated object in his hand.
"Yes they are," Dean deadpanned, as he sealed up the tube on the second floatie. "And this is how they work." He grabbed Cas' arm and slid a floatie up over his trench-coat sleeve. "I mean normally you wouldn't be wearing a coat obviously, but you get the idea." He took the second floatie and pushed it up over Cas' other sleeve, then standing back, he surveyed his work, grinning like an idiot.
Cas looked down at the floaties, first the left one, then the right one, before looking up and glowering at Dean. "Very funny Dean."
"What?" Dean protested all innocence. "They're a floatation safety device Cas, we couldn't have you sinking like a feathery…" Dean closed his eyes against the gust of wind caused by Cas' sudden disappearance.
"Dude, did he just take off wearing floaties?" Sam asked.
"Yes Sam, I believe he did."
Driving back to the motel Dean was still enjoying his little joke.
"You're going to have to apologise Dean."
"Yeah, yeah Sam, I will, but hey, it was just a prank! I'm just treating him like I treat you." Dean turned and smirked at Sam.
"Yeah, well, I'm not so sure that's a good thing." Sam mumbled, "Besides, he doesn't exactly get your humour."
"Well, damn, he should by now." Dean said emphatically. "Anyway, it's all just part of being friends right?"
"Hmmmm" Sam replied
"Oh, he'll be fine, I'll apologise tomorrow Sammy, I promise."
Dean woke up feeling a draft. It was bright. He rubbed a hand across his eyes before opening them. He could hear voices, lots of voices and laughter. He shook the sleepiness out of his head and pushed up on his elbows.
"Can't swim mister?" A spotty kid of about 14 laughed, as he walked passed Dean.
"What? What are…" Dean looked down. He was lying on a deckchair at the Olympic pool. He was wearing red speedos and….pink floaties.
"Nice outfit dude." Another kid said, raising his eyebrows and shaking his head.
Just then Dean's phone rang beside him.
"Dean, are you alright? Where the hell are you?"
"Sammy…" Dean said as he got up and quickly made his way to the exit, folding in on himself in a failed attempt to cover up. "I'm at the Olympic pool, come and get me, now," he said in a rough whisper, "and for God's sake bring me some clothes."
"Bring you some, wait, you're where?"
"Pool Sam the pool. I think this might be Cas' idea of a joke."
"What do you mean? What did he do?"
"Sam. Car. Clothes. Now. Just, please, just come get me." Dean hung up the phone and caught his reflection in the glass door. "Oh shit.' He pulled the floaties off his arms.
Sam burst out laughing as he threw a bag to Dean. Dean was huddled behind some bushes, deflated floaties in his hand. "Dude, what are you wearing?"
"What's it look like I'm wearing Sam?" Dean growled as he sprinted to the car. He pulled a t-shirt and jeans out of the bag and quickly wiggled into them.
"Did Cas do this?" Sam asked through breaks in his laughter.
"No Sam, I came down here dressed like, THIS, and wearing….FLOATIES!" he threw the deflated floaties onto the backseat." I swear I'm going to, wait til I get my hands on that Angel." Dean snarled.
"You kind of asked for it." Sam said still giggling as he slid into the driver's seat and fired up the Impala.
"Sam….I did not make him wear speedos!" Dean crossed his arms and glared out the window.
"You would've if you could've" Sam said.
"Yeah well, I'll get that feathery bastard. It's on." Dean grumbled.
Sam just laughed. "Yeah that sounds like a wise idea, up the ante with an Angel. And after all Dean, it's all just part of being friends right?" Sam could barely contain his glee.
Dean huffed and slid down in the passenger seat, already plotting his next move.
Castiel 1 - Dean Winchester 0
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