Title: A Helping Hand
Fandom: Glee, Season Two AU, set in some vague time after Blame It on the Alcohol, probably after the football season has concluded, but just go with it.
Characters: Kurt Hummel, Finn Hudson; Kinn brotherhood, mentions of Hevans bromance, Kurtana alliance, and Finn/Quinn.
Warnings: Schmoop. Kurt being the BAMF he totally is.
Distribution: Please ask first. Please do not screen-cap, save to hard drive, exchange with others, or translate into other languages without express permission. Thank you.
Feedback: Con-crit is always welcome. Flames are not.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, lyrics, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, actors, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended nor should any be inferred. No profit is being made.
Summary: When Finn is injured during a practice, Kurt descends on Lima General like a prissy angel of vengeance. Injured!Finn, BAMF!Kurt, epic Kinn brotherhood.
Author's Note: For a fill on the LiveJournal glee_fluff_meme. The prompt can be found in the End Notes of the first chapter.
Finn Hudson had always known that he was basically a little girl trapped in the body of Magilla Gorilla. But not a little girl like Puck's sister. Finn was pretty sure that Orphan was really a biopic of Sarah Puckerman. He just couldn't prove it.
So he was secretly a huge girl but was smart enough to hide it most of the time, at least from people who didn't know him well, like Rachel or Puck. They would always tease him when he hurt himself tripping over his own feet, or slamming into doorways which were too narrow for his shoulders, or breathing too hard during Halo and hyperventilating. He knew they were just kidding around, but they were sometimes really mean about his clumsiness. It wasn't his fault he was so tall and uncoordinated! He hadn't asked to be Gigantor.
So when he landed awkwardly from a tackle during a scrimmage, he knew to suck it up and not cry, even though he was pretty sure his wrist was broken. But it really hurt. The only thing that kept him from screaming in agony was that Puck was watching him closely and smirking. Finn knew what that meant, could all but hear the taunting sneers that were about to be unleashed. So he manned up and swallowed his pain before Puck could add to it.
"You all right, Hudson?" Coach Beiste gruffly asked, though there was genuine concern lacing the question.
Finn grunted, wondering why Puck couldn't be more like Beiste, but then realized Puck was too much of a poseur ever to be as badass as she was. He bit his lip to keep from laughing at the sudden image of Puck vs. Beiste at Puck's fight club. Beiste would so totally own him.
"I think it's broken," he muttered.
She scowled and nodded. "Hospital, then. Want me to call your mom to come and get you?"
He shook his head. "She can't get off work and my stepdad is in Dayton today. Maybe Mr. Schue could take me? His car's still in the lot."
"Go on up to the school, then," she said. "Need help, or can you get there on your own?"
Finn gritted his teeth. "I can do it. It's just a broken wrist."
"Then why are you still here?" She turned her back to him and glared at the rest of the team before launching into a blistering tirade about how they had failed to protect their quarterback, singling out Puck for most of her abuse.
Finn all but skipped toward the school, a goofy smile on his face.
Mr. Schue had been super nice about the whole thing and taken him to Lima Memorial in his really nasty car. Finn thought about telling him that he could get the man a discount at Burt's shop if Mr. Schue wanted to bring his wreck in to have it looked over, but decided he should probably keep his mouth shut. He was surprised at his own discretion and wondered if broken bones made you smarter.
Mr. Schue had filled out all of the paperwork and even called his mom for him, which had made Finn a little angry. His mom had been so upset that she couldn't get off work to come to the hospital. She was even crying a little. Finn felt so guilty. His mom worked really hard, and though his wrist was killing him and he wanted a hug, he told himself to get over it and told her not to worry about anything. He'd be fine. It was just a broken wrist. She had sniffled and told him she would bring home his favorite pizza for dinner.
He'd had to wait in the emergency room for a really long time, which he didn't understand, because there was no one else there. Where was everyone? He hadn't seen a doctor or a nurse anywhere, just some lady sweeping up in the atrium. Why would people litter in a hospital? That was so rude. And, like, with global warming or whatever, kind of dangerous. Kurt had told him that it was only a few more years until they saw penguins surfing on icebergs down the middle of Main Street. Finn had thought it sounded pretty cool, but apparently global warming was a Big Important Issue and Kurt had asked Rachel to explain it all for him.
Kurt really was a bastard sometimes.
That was okay, though. Finn had paid him back by throwing out all of Kurt's hair products because they had chloro-somethings in them. He simply couldn't allow his brother to widen the hole in the ozone layer just for the sake of vanity.
He'd thought he'd gotten away with it until a week later, when he'd put on his jockstrap only to find that Kurt had saturated it in Ben Gay and allowed it to dry.
Finn was seated in an exam room, after having insisted that Schue take off, and waiting to see a doctor. He'd had his x-rays and the tech had told him that the wrist was indeed broken, which, duh, Finn had figured out a while ago, and then they put him in some big metal tube that was really loud and made his headache even worse, and then finally some nursing assistant had dropped by to give him an analgesic.
Apparently, that was a pain reliever. He hadn't meant to offend her when he initially turned down her offer of anal. How was he supposed to know? He wasn't a medical professional.
The doctor had finally come in and again reiterated that Finn had a broken wrist, but he used a lot of big words to sound important and then glared when Finn had rolled his eyes.
The doctor was a real jerk who looked even younger than Finn. He was arrogant and mean and bossy, and kept talking about how he was going to be late for his date at the club. Finn was confused. What club, and who made a date for squash? Was there some kind of vegetable kink he didn't know about?
The doctor also had really bad breath, which was totally gross and something that Finn was sure must have been against the Hypocritical Oath. The creepy doctor kept talking about all the football injuries he had procured when he was Finn's age, but since the guy was short and almost painfully thin, Finn wondered how they had all happened.
He supposed he shouldn't have asked if the doctor himself had been the football, because the guy just got a lot more ticked off. He started using words that Finn didn't understand at all, and he kept looking at him like he thought Finn was stupid for not being a doctor or something.
Finn hated that he was alone. He knew that he was a big boy now and everything, but he really was in a lot of pain and he just wanted his mom. He felt stupid for being so weak and needy, but he still had a whole year before he was eighteen and an adult, so he really needed to cram a lot of coddling in there.
The door then slammed open and Kurt Hummel sailed inside the room.
Finn blinked owlishly. "Kurty?" he slurred.
Kurt gave that half-smile he had perfected into an art form before his eyes slowly panned the room, taking everything in. Finn saw Kurt glance at McCreepy, watching as his brother's eyes narrowed. He could tell Kurt instantly hated the dude and felt validated. He also really admired how Kurt could walk into a room, take a quick breath, assess everything, and then act accordingly. Kurt was such an awesome bastard, and Finn sensed his awesome bastard brother was about to punch McCreepy's ticket in.
"Hello Finn," he said brusquely. "Carole called me as soon as she got off the phone with you. She was very upset that she couldn't be here herself, so I excused myself from my remaining classes and arrived as quickly as I could."
"You did that for me?" Finn whispered.
"Of course I did. I'm just sorry it took me so long to get here."
Kurt stepped gingerly around the room, opening various drawers of the bureaus until he emerged with a blanket, which he promptly draped over Finn's legs and tucked tightly around his waist. Thank Cheesus! His teeth were chattering, he was so cold. Kurt then loosened and retied the strings of Finn's dressing gown, causing the boy to release a relieved sigh. It had been really tight.
"I'm so sorry you were alone for so long," Kurt mournfully continued, "but don't worry, I'm here now and I'll stay with you until you're discharged and then drive you home. Dalton is closed tomorrow for a Professional Day, so I don't have to return until next week. I'll take care of everything."
Tears pricked at Finn's eyes. Wow, what he ever do to deserve a brother like Kurt?
"Who are you?" the doctor demanded.
Kurt raised an eyebrow and looked down his nose at the man. "Excuse me? Who are you?"
The man gaped. "I'm the doctor."
Kurt sniffed. "We'll see about that."
"You certainly are," Kurt agreed. "It took you long enough to question my identity. You should have done so as soon as I crossed the threshold. I simply strolled into a private examination room in a tier-one hospital, conducted a conversation with your patient, whose medical records are in plain sight of myself, and you did nothing but sit there and gape like a fussy old woman who just lost the last round of bingo.
"I believe that is a violation of my brother's HIPAA rights. I'll be looking into it. Also, you should have recognized that he was in shock and done your part to keep him warm. This room is freezing, he's trembling, his eyes are glassy, and he's in a thin hospital gown with no pants on, for which I fail to see the reason. Could you explain it to me?"
"Your brother," the man slowly repeated.
"Well, I think we've ascertained that your short-term memory is indeed functional. My worry for my only brother, whom I love very much, is marginally satisfied. Now, as our parents are unavailable, would you please be so kind as to explain Finn's injuries and his prognosis?"
The doctor stared at him.
Kurt was unimpressed and rolled his eyes. "I do hope you're not unnecessarily drawing this out merely so that you can pad your bill by submitting a claim for a level four visit. I go over our insurance company's explanations of benefits with a fine tooth comb, and I'll not hesitate to report suspected fraud."
"Are you even old enough to drive, let alone act as your alleged brother's guardian?" the man demanded. "Look, little boy, I understand you're hysterical because you're concerned about your boyfriend or whatever," he sneered, using air quotes and rolling his eyes, "but you can't barge in here and speak to me this way. Leave now, or I'll contact Security."
"You can't talk to my brother like that!" Finn growled.
Kurt gave McCreepy a pretty smile as his eyes turned so arctic that the doctor instantly shut his mouth. "My, such aspersions you cast upon my character, Doctor…I'm sorry, you didn't introduce yourself. What is your name."
It was a demand, not a question.
"I'm Dr. Patterson."
"How absolutely lovely for no one but you," Kurt snapped back. "I am Kurt Hummel, Finn Hudson's brother. If you had bothered to examine his medical records at all, you would see that they clearly indicate our relationship, that I am his emergency contact following our parents, and thus I am more than capable of assuming custody of him in their stead.
"Further, I dearly hope that your mistaken and utterly patronizing assessment of our relationship was in no way a homophobic comment on your part, or I will be contacting this hospital's Board of Directors, the Department of Patient Advocacy, the American Medical Association, and any other organization I feel should be informed of how you represent this fine institution."
"I didn't…I wasn't…"
"Oh, I'm so glad," Kurt sweetly interjected. "I'm very familiar with the commitment to quality Lima Memorial provides their patients. My family endowed this hospital several years ago with a fellowship after my mother, Suzanne Grayson Hummel, passed away. We're in the process of endowing another for the exemplary care my father, Burt Hummel, received after his heart attack earlier this year."
"Hummel," Patterson slowly repeated, his brain recognizing that he had bitten off way more than he could chew. Especially if this was the same Hummel whose picture he had seen on the desk of the Chief of Staff. Oh, shit.
"No autographs please."
Finn snickered wildly, if not slightly hysterically, and Kurt reached up, placed his hands around Finn's neck, and drew his head down. He placed a soft kiss on Finn's forehead and then pulled it flush with his own, staring into Finn's eyes.
"I know you hate hospitals," Kurt said quietly. "I do, too. I'm going to make sure you're taken care of, that you get everything you need, and then we'll go home and I'll put you to bed and make you that homemade ice cream you like so much, okay? You just need to be brave for a little bit longer and this will all be over."
"I love you." Finn sniffled loudly. "My wrist really hurts."
Kurt frowned. "I know, sweetie, and I love you too. We're almost done here, and Dad and Carole are on their way home, so they'll be there probably before we will. Carole said she's bringing your favorite pizza."
Finn nodded. "You'll have some with me? And we can watch movies?"
Kurt winced. "Of course we can. Your choice." He swallowed heavily. "And, yes, I'll have one slice of pizza."
Finn beamed. "Yay."
Kurt patted his shoulder and crossed the room to look at the displayed x-rays, frowning more deeply.
McCreepy sighed, shaking his head. He didn't have time for this. "As I was explaining to your brother, he has a broken wrist, which means…"
Kurt snorted. "What my brother has is a lunate fracture; specifically, a coronal fracture of the dorsal pole. This suggests that his wrist was hyperextended during the course of the injury."
Finn and McCreepy stared at him.
"This was confirmed by an orthopedist, correct, and is not just the opinion of the radiologist?"
"It was confirmed by the on-call orthopedist, yes," said the bewildered McCreepy.
Kurt spun around on his heel and looked at this brother. "Finn, did you fall during practice? Is that how you fractured your wrist?"
"Did you hold out your hand to brace your fall?" He held his own hand own, palm up. "Like this?"
He nodded. "And the heel of your hand struck the ground? This part here?" he asked, demonstrating with his own.
"Yeah," Finn repeated.
Kurt narrowed his eyes. "Finn," he said slowly, "did you fall, or were you pushed?"
Finn looked down.
"Who pushed you?" Kurt hissed. "Was it Puck?"
Finn shook his head, which made him dizzy. "I don't know who pushed me. It wasn't Puck, but Coach said that I probably wouldn't have been hurt if Puck had been guarding me like he was supposed to."
Kurt stepped forward. "Did Puck laugh at you when you fell? And don't you even think of lying to me, Finn Hudson."
Finn shivered. "He didn't laugh, but I think he wanted to."
Kurt curled a lip. "I'll deal with him. Now, who pushed you? It wasn't Sam, was it?"
"No," Finn said vehemently. "I really don't know who pushed me, since they were behind me, but Sam would never do something like that, even though I probably deserve it. I got him hurt and stole his girlfriend and everything. Besides, I could see Sam the whole time."
Kurt rolled his eyes. "You're right about Sam, and don't get me started on Quinn."
Patterson's head whipped back and forth as though he were paying careful attention to a tennis match.
"Dude, she really misses you," Finn whispered.
Kurt sighed. "Then she shouldn't have been cheating on my best friend with my brother. She shouldn't have cheated on my brother last year with Puck. She shouldn't have sold out one of her best friends or ditched Mercedes because it was convenient."
"She's really sorry, Kurt, and I hurt Sam too."
"I know," Kurt agreed, nodding, "and I'm still very angry with you for that, but since no one else is holding Quinn responsible for her actions, it's up to me, and I do it very well."
"Who are you people!" Patterson exclaimed.
"That information has already been established," Kurt said. "Now, I assume Finn presented with weakness of the wrist and pain aggravated with compression along the third digital ray, as well as palpation tenderness along the volar wrist?"
McCreepy nodded dumbly.
"Kurt's really smart," Finn confided to him.
The other boy blushed lightly.
"Aw," Finn cooed.
"Stop that," Kurt scolded, before clearing his throat. "I presume that, due to overlapping radiodensities, an MRI was performed? I would certainly hope so, in order for this diagnosis to have been made."
"It was," a confused Patterson replied. Seriously, who the fuck was this kid? His eyes narrowed with suspicion. This Hummel boy was far too informed about hospital protocol, and the diagnosis he had just reached was beyond even most physicians who didn't have a specialty in orthopedics. A ringer.
The kid had to be a ringer, but for whom? Was the hospital being investigated? Did he work for some HMO who was about to launch a hostile takeover? A medical malpractice investigation corporation? Just because he looked young didn't mean he was. Perhaps some Restalin or human growth hormone. Maybe even stem cells. The possibilities were endless.
Best to play this carefully, McCreepy wisely decided.
"Any sign of vascular injury or osteonecrosis?" Kurt barked.
"None was detected."
Kurt exhaled noisily and nodded, pleased. "As the fracture was neither displaced nor angulated, he will be treated with cast immobilization?"
Patterson blinked. "He will."
"Long or short arm?"
Kurt pursed his lips and nodded thoughtfully, making mental calculations and schedule adjustments. "To confirm, surgical intervention will not be required?"
Finn gasped. "Surgery? I don't want to have surgery, Kurty!" he wailed.
Kurt ignored him and stared at the doctor, who shook his head.
Kurt nodded. "Percocet for the pain?"
McCreepy blinked and then nodded in concert.
"I assume follow-up care will be rigorous and proceed at close intervals? I refuse to allow my brother to fall prey to Kienbock disease."
"How the fuck do you know all of this?" McCreepy demanded.
Kurt elegantly shrugged a shoulder. "I Googled it as I was driving here."
"What? There is absolutely no way you could have learned how to read x-rays, let alone come up with a lunate fracture diagnosis, just from your Google-Fu!"
"I have many skills." He turned to Finn and gave his brother a bright smile. "Okay, Finny! Dr. Patterson is going to put a cast on your wrist to make you all better and then we'll go home. I'll even let you pick the music for the ride."
Finn eyes widened to the size of saucers. "You're letting me pick the music? I'm not dying, am I?"
Kurt pouted. "Don't ever tease about something like that, Finn Hudson. Now, you think about what color you want your cast to be. Personally, I would go with blue, since it matches most of your clothes, or red, to set off your eyes and skin tone. Plain white is boring and gets dirty too easily. Further, any messages put on the cast must be approved by me, and I will be spell-checking."
"Kurt," Finn whined.
Kurt waved at him dismissively. "I'm going to step outside and call Aunt Liddie to get a referral to the best orthopedist in Allen County, as well as for a physical therapist. I will not allow this injury to derail your football career and any possible scholarships."
Finn frowned. "Who's Aunt Liddie?"
Kurt rolled his eyes. "Santana's mother."
"Oh," he whispered.
Kurt turned, hands on hips, and smiled at Patterson. "I'm sure you're familiar with Dr. Lydia Lopez, your Chief of Staff."
Patterson paled. Fuck.
"Her daughter, Santana, is one of my dearest friends."
Patterson paled further.
Kurt grinned. "I see you've been acquainted with Miss Lopez." He leaned forward slightly. "Allow me to take the opportunity to assure you that I am far more dangerous than she."
"Dude. He really is," Finn confirmed. "He's a total ninja. He's got swords and everything."
"I'll be right back, brother mine," Kurt said, storming from the room.
Patterson shakily sat down on his stool.
"I think I'll go with the blue," Finn chirped.
End Note: This will probably be a three-shot, and thus much longer than it probably should be, but I love writing Kinn brotherhood schmoop.
Here's the original prompt: Finn hurts his right wrist(or left if he's left-handed) in football practice or a game. Because of that he constantly needs help with things like opening his locker, popping open his bottle of pain pills, opening cans of pop, etc.