I DO NOT OWN NCIS
"I think, Greyson, is masculine."
"Greyson DiNozzo? That doesn't really sound right."
Ziva sighed and rested her hand on her large eight and a half month stomach, it was their first child. Everything was seemingly going fine, the nursery was done. They already had the baby shower. So now they needed a name for their child.
"Um, I don't care." Ziva said uneasily.
Anthony looked at his wife, "Are you okay?"
Ziva shook her head, "No. No, something, something, does not feel right."
"It's probably just…you know, the baby moving." He said.
Ziva shook her head, "No. She kicks me in the ribs when she moves."
"Well…do you wanna call the doctor?" Tony asked cautiously.
Ziva opened her mouth to speak, "I-uh, I don't know."
Tony shifted over to her side of the bed and wrapped her arms around his neck, "Wh-Where are we going?" Ziva asked.
"We're going on the hospital, and no, you don't have a say in it."
"That's not what I was going to say."
Ziva lightly placed a hand on his chest, "Angeliese is a beautiful name."
That's all that ran through his mind, "I'm sorry Mister DiNozzo, your wife…you wife-….the baby…the baby passed away."
Tony sunk to the floor, tears streaming from his face.
"I'm so sorry."
Tony looked up at her through his tears, "Was…Was the baby the boy or girl?"
"I don't really think-"
"Please." He pleaded.
"It was a girl."
Tony's breath staggered, "A little girl. My little girl." He breathed.
"Your wife wants to see…your daughter after all the tests are completed. Would you like to see her?"
Tony nodded and wiped his eyes, "Yes, I want to see her."
The doctor held out her hand, he pulled himself up, and followed her down a hall. A nurse in blue scrubs looked up at him teary-eyed, Tony slowly walked over to the cradle.
His breath hitched, "Oh my god, she looks just like Ziva."
Her skin was a honey color and she was wrapped in a bright pink blanket.
"She looks just like Ziva." He said in a hushed tone.
"She is a pretty baby," The nurse whispered. "Does she have a name?"
Tony shook his head, "Uh, no. We- we were discussing some."
The nurse nodded before excusing herself.
Tony lightly ran a hand over his daughter's skin, it was like pure silk.
Slowly, he slid his arms up under her body and gently picked her up.
"Hi. Hi, precious." He murmured as he rubbed the heel of her foot.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry we couldn't spend as much time as we wanted too. I would have taught you how to play basketball; I would have shown how to make a free throw too and maybe a few cheats here and there."
He ran a hand through her brown swirly curls, "I'm sorry."
He felt a firm hand on his shoulder, "Gibbs." He breathed.
Tony turned around and looked his boss straight in the eye, neither broke eye contact,
"I'm Sorry." Gibbs said.
Tony licked his lips and broke the contact, he stared down at his daughter, his dead daughter, "Does it make any easier? No knowing your child, before they-"
Gibbs's grip on his shoulder tightened, "I can't tell you that knowing them and then losing them is easier. I can tell you that, remembering makes moving on more bearable."
Tony lip quivered as he let his tears drip, "I have no memories."
Gibbs shook his head, "What about all those ultrasound photo's? Those are memories, or when you first felt her kick, those are memories."
Tony sniffled, "I don't know."
Gibbs patted his shoulder, "Don't worry, you'll have some time to think."
Tony didn't look at him instead he focused on her eyes,
"Do you think she would have had Ziva's eyes or mine?" Tony asked.
Gibbs shrugged, "I don't know, but she is beautiful anyway."
Ziva David-DiNozzo slowly rolled into the room. All of the team was there, passed out.
Abby was curled into McGee's side, Palmer beside them, her cheeks were red and puffy…from crying, she thought.
Ducky lay in an arm chair in the far corner, but Gibbs…Gibbs was, not there. Anywhere.
"Five Pounds, Eleven Ounces." A nurse said quietly to another before she wrote it down a piece of paper that Ziva could not make out.
"Length?" the one with the paper asked.
"Olive Colored Skin."
The nurse who checked over the baby stopped and looked at Tony, who sat at the end of the cradle watching the whole thing, "Eyes?" the nurse with the paper asked again.
"What color were her eyes?" Tony whispered.
Slowly the nurse brought herself to do it and murmured, "Brown, a chocolate brown."
Tony sighed and ran his hands over his face, "Does she have a name yet?"
"Angeliese Madeleine DiNozzo." Ziva murmured.
Tony looked up at his wife, "Ziva."
Ziva tried to stand but Tony rushed over and caught her by the waist, "I just want to see her." Ziva whispered into his neck.
Tony lightly petted her head as she cried into his neck, "She's beautiful Ziv, she's breath-taking. She looks just like you."
"I just wanna see her." Ziva croaked. "I just wanna see her."
Tony kissed her head and nodded, "Let me help you."
Tony slowly help her walk over to the cradle, Ziva slowly peered into the crib and tearfully gasped,
"She's…You were right, she is…breath-taking."
Tony wrapped one of his arms tightly around her shoulder, "We were gonna bring her home in a month." He said.
Ziva nodded, "And she was going to be loved and cared for," Ziva laid her head on his chest, "I'm sorry, it is-."
Tony placed a finger on her lips and shook his head, "It's not your fault, it's not anybody's fault."
They were both silent, just watching their daughter in the crib before Ziva asked painfully and carefully,
"Can I hold her?"
Tony sadly smiled and nodded, he placed his hands on top of hers and they both softly and gingerly picked the baby up, "Her skin…is so soft." Ziva whispered.
Tony nodded, "Just like her Momma's."
Ziva gloomily smiled and played with each of Angeliese's curls, one by one, "She would have been a pretty little girl."
Tony gently guided them back into the rocking chair, Ziva sat in his lap and Angeliese rested in both of their arms.
"I'm gonna miss not having her kicking me in the ribs."
"I thought you hated that."
Ziva shrugged, "It gave me a sense of accomplishment. That I was doing something right, with the pregnancy."
Tony kissed Ziva's cheek, "You're always doing something right, and that's why I love you."
Ziva placed a soft kiss on Angeliese's forehead before laying her head back on Tony's shoulder, and softly humming a Hebrew lullaby.
The funeral was small, only the team, family, and a few close friends. Gibbs made a fine handmade casket, which surprised them since he only had days to make. But it explained why he left the hospital so soon.
Nobody spoke or made a speech, everybody just said their goodbyes, and then they left.
They was no reception, everybody just went home.
Ziva immediately stripped of her black clothing and turned the knob to the shower to its highest setting before stepping in and crumbling on the floor.
The steaming water washing over her body as sobs racked her body.
Tony instead went and stood in the center of the nursery staring at the stuffed animals, and the white crib, the bright yellow walls, and the blanket. The blanket, that blanket was the first thing he and Ziva had bought when they found out they were pregnant. It was covered in monkeys and giraffes.
He ran a hand over it and smiled, "I think you would have liked this blanket Angeliese, I think you really would have."
He slowly walked out of the nursery and into his own bedroom. He took off his jacket and sat on the edge of the bed, and placed his head in his hands.
They had each buried something with her; Ziva gave her Star of David necklace, Abby gave Bert, McGee gave a medal he had won in middle school, Ducky gave a Scottish little bear, Gibbs had given her a little doll that belong to Kelly, and Tony…Tony had given his daughter his mother's locket. The locket was a big emerald that she wore every day and left to him when she had died.
"That way she can tell she's my kid." He had told himself.
He took off his shirt and pants and threw them aside with the other piles of clothes, and as he was about to throw on a pair of sweats he heard…crying. He slowly pushed open his bathroom door and walked inside.
He opened the door to the shower and looked down at his wife, who sat on the floor, her legs held closely to her body as she cried.
He climbed in next to her, not caring that his skin was turning red from the scorching water, or that his clothes were now soaked. He wrapped his arms tightly around her. And he too, began to cry.
He watched her sleep that night; he watched her chest rise and fall.
He couldn't sleep, no matter how hard he tried, no matter which way he slept. He couldn't go to sleep.
"You cannot sleep tonight." Ziva said groggily.
"I thought you were asleep." Tony said.
Ziva rolled on her side and looked at him, "I was…but I had a dream…about Tali, and Jenny. She was with them, and Kate and Kelly."
Tony smiled and brushed a strand of her hair from his face, "They'll take good care of her for us." He murmured.
Ziva nodded, "They're our angels. She's our angel."
Tony chuckled softly, "We could have called her Angel, short for Angeliese."
Ziva nodded, "Our Angel."
They still grieved like every other family who lost a child. But every time they shed a tear, they grew stronger and closer. And one night, they grew closer than they had been in a long time, since their tragedy.
Shortly after she showed him eight, little, digital letters that brought an ecstatic smile to both their faces.
They kept it a secret for a long period, full of fear, anxiety, and suspense.
Once they were assured numerous times that everything was going excellently, they told only a few close people and as both the pregnancy and Ziva grew they told more people.
But as Ziva hit that trimester, that month, that week, that day, they all held their breath for what seemed like the rest of the pregnancy until finally they met at the same hospital. But instead of tears and sobs, they were smiling and laughing.
As Tony held his newborn son, proudly showing him off to the team, Ziva held their daughter.
"Cristian, do you like your godparents?" Tony asked.
Gibbs smiled and shrugged, "It's a good possibility."
"Cristian Antonio Isaac DiNozzo." Abby murmured as she ran a hand through Cristian's sandy colored hair.
Ziva smiled and kissed Shiloh Aaliyah Gynesis DiNozzo's forehead as the baby cooed at something in the doorway.
Ziva smiled and looked at where Shiloh was looking, Ziva gasped.
Standing there, in the very center of the doorway, was a little girl. She had long brown curls that flowed down her back, big chocolate swirl eyes, and honey colored skin. She had on a simple purple and pink dress, but a pink blanket was draped over her shoulders, along with a Star of David and Tony's mother's necklace around her neck.
She smiled and waved, "Hi Mommy." She whispered.
"Angel." Ziva breathed.
Tony and the rest of the team turned and looked at her, "What, babe?" Tony asked.
Ziva pointed to the doorway, "Angel." She murmured.
Tony turned and looked at the doorway before looking back at her, "You see her, don't you?" Ziva asked.
The whole team looked at her strangely, but put it off as all the drugs from the delivery.
Tony smiled and nodded, "Our Angel, she's a big sister now."