Rei's Thoughts

By Princess Moon Kitty

Sailor Moon was created by the absolutely fantastic Naoko Ta-keuchi and belongs to Kodansha. The characters of Sailor Moon also belong to DiC and Toei Animation.

Please email me anytime at tinylittlekitty@hotmail.com with any flames or comments as both are important for any writer.

I hope you enjoy my story.

Neo Queen Mars looked down from her balcony and saw her best friend Queen Serenity and her husband King Endymion taking a stroll through the gardens of Crystal Tokyo. Following them were Neo Queen Mercury and her husband Greg, Neo Queen Venus and her husband Melvin and lastly were Neo Queen Jupiter and her husband Andrew. They were so happy together arm in arm and Mars watched them sadly. Not one of the other girls knew the way she felt or could even begin to understand her sadness. Their loves had been saved during the time of freeze before Crystal Tokyo was created and when they had awoken one thousand years later they had married. Mars' late boyfriend Chad hadn't been saved and he had died before the big freeze and nearly half the population of Earth died in the big freeze. Chad wasn't the first love she had lost, he was her fourth. Mars remembered her time in the Silver Millennium well and she remembered in particular the day she had met a young man from Earth who was a general for Earth's armies. Being a member of the sailor scouts it had been her business to know everything that was happening on all the planets and Earth was no exception. She had entered the conference room with a worldly grace and found herself confronted by a young man with mischievous ice blue eyes and unruly golden blonde hair. He had bowed to her respectfully and introduced himself, as Lord Jedite and Rei could never forget his name. She was introduced to the other three generals, Lord Neflite, Lord Zoisite and Lord Malachite. Lastly she was introduced to the Lord Darien, Prince of the Earth and, had Jedite not been there, Rei would probably have focused her attentions on his sapphire blue eyes and silky ebony hair but with Jedite in the room no one but him could have her attention. He looked as interested in her as she was in him but he didn't let admiration get involved with the way he conducted the conference. He had voted that with the imminent attack of the evil Negaverse Queen called Berryl the Moon should send its fighters to Earth to ensure they did not reach the Moon. Rei however had argued that it was not assured that Queen Berryl would attack the Earth before the Moon. A vote was decided upon and Rei's vote won leaving Jedite to storm out of the room in anger. As Darien and his generals had taken their leave Darien had leaned to whisper in her ear.

"You have made a grand conquest with Jedite, he only argues to impress and see if the girl argues back."

Rei had blushed as Darien left the room giving her a wink as he shut the door behind him.

That night Rei had taken her nighttime stroll in the garden and was startled to find someone waiting for her.

"Lord Jedite!" she exclaimed and she couldn't quite disguise her pleasure.

"I am sorry to intrude upon you but I wished to apologise for my behaviour in the conference room," Jedite said bowing to Rei and Rei placed her delicate hand on his arm.

"Nonsense you did what you had to do and I did what I had to do, it is business," Rei assured him and Jedite had straightened with a daring look in his eyes. Before Rei knew what was going on Jedite had her in his arms and was kissing her fiercely on the lips. He pulled away quickly leaving the hotness of his lips still vividly on Rei's. Then he had walked away.

"Wait Lord Jedite!" Rei had called to him a redness in her cheeks as she rushed to him. Jedite turned around but did not look her directly in the eyes.

"Yes my Lady Rei?" he asked dutifully and Rei had surprised herself by taking his face between her small hands and kissing him softly.

"That's all," she said when they parted and she hurried to her room breathing deeply her face flushed.

Her best friend and Princess of the Moon, Serena, came into the room and had noticed her flushing face.

"Hot out in the garden tonight is it?" Serena asked mistaking Rei's redness for heat and Rei grinned at her.

"You have no idea."

During the weeks that followed Rei met Jedite in the garden every night. If they happened to cross paths during the day they were polite to each other but when night came they were lovers. Rei learnt more about her lover every night. She learnt of his mother, Emerald and his father Sapphire and how both had disappeared from Earth and were never heard of again. She learnt about how he had grown up in an orphanage and with only his skill helping him, worked his way up to the top rank of the Earth's army. Oh Rei loved her handsome general. Then came that night of torturous emotions. She had met Jedite as usual in the garden and without saying a word he had sat her on a bench and knelt before her a hopeful expression showing plainly on his face.

"Rei, I know we have only just met but I know I love you and my feelings for you reach the outer limits of space and far beyond, I never want to loose you, Rei will you do me the honour of becoming my wife, I know I am not some fancy prince who owns a castle but I love you," Jedite declared gallantly and Rei took his hand.

"Jedite I don't care if you live in a swamp I love you and I would be delighted to be your wife," Rei said and the two kissed passionately and Jedite put an engagement ring of rubies and diamonds on her finger before sitting her down again this time a serious expression on his handsome face.

"Rei I have news, it has just came through to us tonight that Earth is under attack and tonight we return to defend our planets so can you wait for me?" Jedite revealed and Rei gasped realising that this meant Jedite had a strong chance of not surviving.

"For you I could wait a lifetime," Rei promised eagerly kissing him and Jedite kissed her before striding off calling to her.

"This is the happiest day of my life."

"It is the happiest day of my life too," she called to him before adding to herself,

 "And the saddest."

The next morning news arrived that Earth had been conquered and only Prince Darien survived the attack. Rei had run to where he was recovering in a guest room and fell to her knees beside his bed tears streaming down her face.

"Darien, please tell me he is all right, tell me he is waiting for me," Rei begged knowing that her hopes were in vain.

"I am sorry Rei, but I cannot say what isn't true Jedite has been captured and brainwashed by the Negaverse, there is nothing anyone can do for him," Darien said disregarding Rei who convulsed in violent sobs and unexpectedly Rei threw herself into his arms and he held her tight whispering words of endearments and in those few minutes the two became closer than anyone could have imagined.

Suddenly a loud bell blared through the palace followed by cries of,

"We're under attack!"

Rei swallowed the rest of her tears and transformed into Sailor Mars and Darien watched her in awe before attempting to get up.

"No Darien you cannot help us as you are," Rei commanded but Darien disregarded her order and began putting on his armour.

"But I can do nothing laying here," Darien argued and Rei cocked her head to the side before agreeing and as they ran outside together Darien gave her a warning that chilled her heart.

"You will have to fight Jedite of this I am sure, but do not be fooled, he is not the man you once knew, this I know first hand," Darien had assured her looking pointedly at his wounds before running off to look for the princess whom he had been betrothed to recently for the good of the earth more than for love. Darien was right. As soon as Rei reached the battlefield she was confronted by her betrothed.

"Where are you running off to sweetheart?" he mocked her in a voice that sounded nothing like the man she once knew. As she looked around she saw Sailor Venus in a fierce fight with Lord Malachite and although Mina had the upper hand in the fight she was crying and Rei knew why. It was only four days ago Mina had told her she was having a love affair with Lord Malachite and she was sure she was with a baby, his baby. All around her she saw her friends fighting with their lovers. Sailor Jupiter with Neflite, Sailor Mercury with Zoisite, it was all too much to bare but Rei put on a brave face and taunted her betrothed back.

"I was looking for you darling," she told him smiling cruelly and they began to fight. A loud group of sobbing attracted Rei's attention and she saw her friends huddled in a circle surrounding three dead bodies. Mina was holding her stomach and crying the hardest. Rei's preoccupation with her friends gave Jedite an opening and he sent her blasting into a brick wall. Rei lay still pretending to be hurt as she fired up her most powerful move reluctantly and as he neared she let go of her power.

"Mars Fireballs Surround!"

She heard a cry of pain followed by a dull thud then a sound of screeching. The last sound made her open her eyes and she saw the evil that had been contaminating Jedite leave his body leaving him alone and in pain. Horrified Rei ran to his side and placed his head on her lap.

"Jedite my love speak to me," she pleaded and slowly Jedite opened his eyes and when he focused on her he smiled lovingly, tracing a cool finger down her wet cheek.

"I'm happy so happy you're here," he told her smiling before he began to slip away from her, "I…love…you."

"And I love you," Rei said placing his head on the ground and closing his eyes. Rei had noticed Jedite's knife that sat on his hips. It looked so inviting so happy, it would take her to Jedite. Rei smiled as she remembered a play Jedite had told her about called Romeo and Juliet.

"Well Romeo, wherever you lead your Juliet will follow," Rei said before plunging the shining dagger into her heart.

Around her fallen body the other scouts gathered and slowly each followed her example.

Neo Queen Mars didn't realise she had been crying till she felt a wetness on her cheek and noticed the tears on the page of the red leather diary she had been writing in. It wasn't the only time Rei had to kill the one she loved Rei remembered bluntly as she thought of the last time she saw Jedite. He had been reborn just as she had only he remained evil. From the moment she saw him again at her temple asking for a job she knew who he was. Only he did not remember her, that much was plain when he sent her to another dimension to be destroyed by the droid there. And so the story of her life unfolded and she had to destroy him once again without showing the other girls the real way she felt. Rei had become an expert on hiding her feelings. Her third heartbreak was Darien the prince from long ago who had been reborn. They had dated for a while and liked each other deeply until the day came when Darien was wounded by Zoisite and it was revealed that he was the prince from long ago and was betrothed to Serena. Rei had been deeply wounded when Luna made Darien and Serena's story into a love story when it was more a mission of survival. Without the support of the moon the Earth would have been destroyed. But Rei let them believe it and watched as Darien forgot all about her and fell in love with his precious Princess Serena. No one ever asked her how she felt; no one ever cared all they cared about was the princess and her happiness. Of course Rei hid the way she was hurting from them all but she couldn't stay in the same room with Darien and Serena for too long before she would get snappy. And last was Chad her favourite singer and friend. He had left the temple in a huff when Rei wouldn't say she loved him back. She just couldn't, anyone she loves she looses. But when she saw him leaving she knew she couldn't let him go.

"I love you Chad," she suddenly screamed and Chad turned around in surprise.

"What?" he said in disbelief and Rei took a deep breath.

"I love you!" she yelled at the top of her lungs and she ran into his waiting arms.

"I love you too," he said softly kissing her nose.

Then the phone rang and it was Chad's frantic mother.

"Your father is dying Chad please come home," she had yelled and Rei heard the words from where she was standing beside Chad. Rei watched as Chad looked from her to the phone and knew he wasn't sure whether to leave or not.

"Chad go, your family is important just remember to come back to me," Rei had said though her heart was breaking inside before going into her room and shutting the door. That night she had a dream about Chad and in it his plane crashed. Rei had woken up sweating profusely and Rei knew she had a vision of his death. The next morning Rei went to warn Chad but she was too late. Chad had left early in the morning leaving a letter to Rei.

Dearest Rei,

I am sorry I am leaving like this without saying goodbye but if I wait I may never leave. I just wanted to tell you that I wasn't always so stupid and I did learn much from your grandfather. I had a dream last night of my death and no doubt you had one too but I know better than to defy fate so I left and I am going to die. I am sorry I won't be able to come back to you but you know I love you so much with all my heart and I will never truly leave you.

Yours forever and a day,

Chad

P.S. I knew I loved you before I met you.

Rei shut herself in her room and for days never left her room. Then Serena had come in telling her it wasn't the end of the world and that she would love again.

"I will never love again, I don't want to love again, I have lost all those I love and I will not hurt anyone anymore," Rei cried out and Serena left the room quite unprepared for what Rei had said. Rei was glad Serena left the room or she would have yelled to her about the loves she had lost. Rei felt like there was no life left in her. Finally she emerged and masked her emotions with a smile and taunts mainly at Serena who had her one love who was still alive. Rei was often snappy and cruel but no one knew that at night Rei cried for those she had lost.

Neo Queen Mars sighed as she remembered all this. She had not thought about them in years. Why is that Rei? Mars asked herself. Because it hurts, an inner voice replied and Mars shut the book with a snap. Yelling outside stole Rei's attention and she hurried outside to see the gardeners digging something out of the garden and all her friends standing around.

"What is going on?" Mars asked and Serenity shrugged.

"The gardeners swore they found something we would probably like to see," Serenity told her and everyone waited in suspense as they pulled up a bright pink crystal that encased a figure.

There was a stunned silence before one word escaped Serenity, Endymion, Mercury and Mars' mouths.

"Jedite."

"So this was what happened to him," Mercury pondered walking around the crystal and examining it.

"The poor thing," Serenity said having a heart for pity but Endymion was not so kind.

"Good riddance," Endymion had said not forgetting the last time Jedite and he had met and fought at the airport.

"Get him out of that Mercury," Mars commanded not letting the hope creep into her voice and Mercury gave her a puzzled look but whipped out her computer and tried to find ways to break the crystal.

"Why Rei? That man deserves to be in that crystal," Endymion argued and Rei shook her head sadly. Endymion didn't remember that in the Silver Millennium they were best friends.

"You don't know anything, he doesn't deserve to be punished for following orders when he was brainwashed just like we didn't punish you when you were brainwashed," Rei said softly to Endymion who looked away for her couldn't hold her penetrating violet gaze.

"He was brainwashed?"

"Yes, in the Silver Millennium while defending your planet he himself was caught and brainwashed, he did not choose the life he had when he was reborn," Mars revealed and looked to Mercury, "Have you found a way to set him free?"

"Yes I have but it is going to take all of the scouts power," Mercury said and Mars was adamant to set Jedite free.

"Then lets do it," Mars said and the others followed her without a second thought.

"Mercury Power."

"Mars Power."

"Jupiter Power."

"Venus Power."

"Cosmic Moon Power."

They all yelled and a blast of energy hit the crystal and to Mars' relief the crystal began to melt. Slowly it melted away and soon only Jedite remained standing. Then he fell limply to the floor.

"Jedite," Mars cried out and ran to his side while the others watched on confused. Jedite opened his eyes and saw Mars.

"Lady Rei? Sailor Mars? I do not understand," Jedite said dazedly and Rei knew why. His past life and his present life were joining as one and he was confused about her. Was she is love or his enemy?

"Oh Jedite look inside yourself and see who I am," Rei begged him and Jedite looked hard at her before reaching up to touch her cheek affectionately.

"You are my lady," he said before falling unconscious.

"Yes, yes I am," Mars, said tears running down her cheek and she stood up and spoke to Serenity.

"Please heal him and rid him of all his dark energy," Mars pleaded and Serenity nodded not really knowing what was going on. She brought out the Silver Crystal and healed Jedite who was still unconscious and then Mars asked attendants to take him to a room while Mars took her friends into the conference room to explain what was happening.

"Rei what is going on?" Endymion asked and Mars smiled at him.

"Always so impatient, do you remember our time in the Silver Millennium? Do you remember the day we met each other for the first time? When us the Sailor Scouts and the princess met you Prince Darien and your four generals. I remember it clearly and I was introduced to Lord Jedite. We met in the garden every night, that no one knew and we fell in love. He was different then kind, loving, nothing like he was after Berryl got through with him. One night Earth was attacked and Jedite left to defend Earth. He returned the man you can remember," Mars finished and Venus came forward.

"If you were with Jedite were any of us in love with the other generals?" Venus asked and Mars had a choice. She could break their hearts by telling them they destroyed their loves from the past when they could of saved them or she could make them believe that they were never romantically involved with the generals therefore avoiding any hurt. Ignorance is bliss, Mars decided and she smiled weakly.

"No of course not it was just me being the foolish little miss who fell in love," Mars laughed and Venus looked at her not really believing but not wanting to discuss it any further in front of everyone.

"I think I have had enough excitement for one day," Serenity said fanning herself before taking Endymion's arm and letting him lead her to their bedroom. The rest followed her example and soon Mars was left alone. Hurriedly she raced to Jedite's room and saw him resting quietly in a bed. She walked to the bed and knelt by his side taking his hand.

"You weren't telling the truth Rei were you?" a voice asked and Mars turned to see Venus as pale as a ghost standing in the doorway. Mars was about to deny the accusation but the look on Venus' face stopped her and she lowered her head in defeat.

"No I was not," Mars said not wanting to reveal what Venus wanted to hear but Venus was adamant. She stepped into the room and shut the door firmly.

"Tell me the truth now!" she demanded in a whisper and Mars looked outside the window.

"You want to know the truth? The truth that you were having a love affair with Malachite, the truth that you were carrying his child when you had to kill him, the truth that you destroyed him again in this time when you could have saved him," Mars replied in monotone and Venus' only reply was a heart wrenching sob as though she knew all along but didn't want to believe it.

"I am sorry, I did not mean to sound so harsh," Mars apologised and Venus hugged her tightly crying for the man she once knew and the baby she never knew. An hour later Venus had left the room leaving Mars alone with Jedite and she fell asleep on his broad chest.

The next morning Mars awoke and looked up to see Jedite smiling up at her.

"Jedite are you… all right now?" Mars asked and Jedite brought her face to his and kissed her gently.

"I am now thank you my sweet, by the way when I left you a long time ago, weren't we engaged to be married?" Jedite asked hugging her tightly and Rei smiled up at him.

"We were indeed," Rei confirmed lovingly and Jedite kissed her forehead.

"Then lets do it!"

So finally after centuries of searching for each other Jedite and Rei were reunited and married as it was meant to be. They had together twin baby boys whom they named Emeralite and Diamonite but their story is another story.