Chapter One: The Deliveries
Zoro yawned as he made his way out of the house still only in boxers, with his hair sticking in different directions as he lazily sauntered his way to the curb, barely awake. It was trash day, and it was his sole duty to take the garbage to the curb. He had left the garbage bags pile by the door so today he had to carry all four bags. He lifted the trash bin lids, dropping the trash for the dump truck to pick up.
He made his way back into the house after getting the mail and picking up his tenant's newspaper from the driveway. He had to step over Sprinkles just to get inside, who had the habit of sleeping right by the door. It was like he waited there just to try and trip him over. He heard the sound of heavy boots making their way down the stairs and saw Perona dressed in her usual Gothic Lolita attire, ready for the day.
"Zoro! Did you really just walk outside in your boxers?" she shrieked as she looked him over. "And why aren't you dressed yet?"
Zoro yawned, dismissing her as he walked past her and made his way up the stairs. He heard sounds in the kitchen; no doubt breakfast was being made. It smelled pretty good too.
"Where are you going?" Perona asked, hoping he was heading to his room to change.
"Pre-breakfast nap," he mumbled.
"But breakfast is almost ready," she said. They needed to eat and leave in an hour. If he took a nap now they would never make it on time.
He was half way up the stairs, he was so close to his bed, he could almost feel it. "I'll eat after my nap."
Perona was about to argue with him when they heard a voice call for the kitchen.
"Roronoa! Girl! Breakfast is ready. Get down here."
Perona smiled at Zoro, knowing he couldn't worm his way out of something when it was the landlord giving the orders. Zoro groaned and climbed down the stairs again, him and Perona walked into the kitchen together and took their seats at the table. They both greeted the man by the stove who was serving them their breakfast.
"Good morning!" Perona smiled sweetly, taking the plate of pancakes that was offered.
"Good morning," Mihawk answered dully, sitting down at the round wooden table on either side of them.
"Mihawk," Zoro nodded, taking his plate as well.
"Roronoa," Mihawk said as he folded a napkin on his lap. Zoro looked over at Mihawk, who was wearing his fluffy wine red robe again. Living with Mihawk for a year and knowing him half his life did little to change the fact that he couldn't help but stare every time he wore something like that. "Quit gawking Roronoa." Mihawk said, taking a sip of his coffee. "You're in no position to stare, you're the one eating at the table in your underwear."
Zoro shrugged and continued eating, vaguely listening to Perona's ramblings about something or other. He knew Mihawk didn't pay much attention to her either, and he was dead sure Perona knew that but that never stopped her from yapping her gums away.
Mihawk eyed Zoro after wiping the corner of his lips. "You should get dressed. Don't want to be late for work Roronoa."
Zoro smirked and leaned back in his chair, having finished his meal moments ago. "It's ok. My boss gets in way later than me. I can take my time."
Mihawk didn't look amused. "You have to open up the shop Roronoa. Don't be late."
Zoro's smirk never left his face. "I haven't been late so far."
Mihawk narrowed his eyes. "Your boss might consider firing you."
Zoro still had that smirk on his face as he picked up his and Mihawk's dishes, leaving Perona's. She was a slow eater to begin with, but she also talked so much she sometimes forgot to eat. He put the plates in the sink and went to his room to get ready for work.
The car ride was noisy as usual. He always turned on his radio, hoping to drown out Perona but somehow her shrill voice always seemed to be louder than his music. They both were riding in his truck with the windows down, and Zoro really regretted turning on the radio because now Perona was singing at the top of her lungs in that voice of hers that made Zoro cringe and recoil, earning stares from the cars that passed by them.
He got them to work in record time and parked outside of Kuraigana Bouquets, never so happy to get out of his car. He had sped to work, not wanting to listen to Perona's singing any longer than he had to. Locking his car he made his way over to the small flower shop on the corner where they both worked.
He got his keys out of his pocket and kneeled down in order to key the lock while Perona tapped her foot impatiently behind him. He lifted the steel rolling doors and walked inside, turning on the lights. Him and Perona began to set up the arrangements on the stands, taking out the birthday cards and other special occasion cards and placing them on the table where the cash register was.
After they were both done with that he went to the two rooms behind the cash register and opened the doors. Perona went to the room on the right and began to set up her workstation where she made the flower arrangements. The room on the left was their boss's office. Zoro stepped inside and turned on the coffee machine to make a fresh brew that was located on the table near the window, overlooking the store.
"Zoro!" Perona's voice drifted from the other room. "Did Fullbody want a Morning Melody Rose Bouquets or an Enchanted Rose Bouquets?"
Zoro grumbled. "Hang on, I haven't even turned on the computer yet!" he went to register and turned on the PC. He scrolled through the lists of orders that were placed and found Fullbody's order. "He wanted Never Let Go Poppies," he briefly wondered how she could have gotten so badly confused. "Why couldn't you check?" he yelled over his shoulder.
"You were closer!" she said, coming out from the back to stand behind him. "And could you open the closet for me?"
Zoro got out the keys again and went to open the supply closet where Perona kept her scissors, vases, ribbons, candles, candle rings, Styrofoam balls and sheets, picks, and other things he didn't care about but that she apparently needed to make the arrangements.
She got out the vase she needed for the Poppy arrangement and the rest of her supplies, smiling at him. "Thanks."
He shrugged and walked to the computer to check for the other orders. He smirked at the familiar names. Duval, Fullbody, and Sanji.
Those guys were hopeless. They sent flowers almost every week. Especially that one Sanji guy, he was the worst one of all. He seemed like a real character, always sending flowers to the same set of women who usually groaned or sighed when they received the flowers.
He was truly amazed that he could remember so many women's birthdays, anniversary of meeting them, or congratulating them for the raise, for the new home, for the new job. Anything that happened in their lives was a reason for him to celebrate it seemed. And of course, send them extravagant flower arrangements.
The guy must have made mad money to order so many flowers every few days; the arrangements weren't exactly cheap. But what was more ridiculous than the amount of times that he ordered flowers what the guy would write in his cards. It was hilarious.
Zoro had never read any of the cards before on a moral principle, but once he heard Perona giggling in the back and she had called him over telling Zoro he had to read the card. He had refused at first, but she had eventually convinced him to read it after catching a glimpse.
Needless to say, ever since that day Perona would call him over as she wrote the card in her smooth cursive, written with a sparkly pink gel pen so they could both read and laugh at what this guy Sanji had written together. It was always some real gut wrecking declaration of love that made that made both Zoro and Perona uncertain if they should laugh or puke. But the best part of it all was that the guy always singed it, 'Prince.'
He printed out their orders, along with the message needed for the card and made his way to Perona's workstation, handing her the list. She looked it over then told Zoro. "I'll have them all ready in an hour. Oh, and go get the two blue vases, the round clear one, three green square ones and the yellow cylinder vase from the supply closet, I need those."
"That's your job."
"Well you have nothing to do now, just get it."
"I got to sweep the floors and turn on the sprinklers."
"That takes like five seconds," she pouted. "Do it for me please?"
He groaned and went to get it; he might as well. He carried the vases she needed and brought it to her, then went to the back to get the broom. He was in the middle of sweeping the floor when Mihawk walked in, who was wearing one of his flower printed shirts again. Made of silk. He wondered where he found those shirts, and if they were even meant for men.
"You get my coffee ready?" Mihawk asked him, strolling past him briskly.
"Yeah," he confirmed, following after Mihawk.
"Seven, three of them from the regulars."
Mihawk nodded and sat in the leather chair in front of the desk. "Tell Perona to get them all ready, I want the deliveries to go out before noon."
"She's already working on them, and she's said they'll be ready in an hour."
Mihawk settled his hands, one on top of the other on his desk and looked at Zoro. "Make sure you don't get lost this time, it seems the GPS I got you works for nothing."
"Not my fault it doesn't work."
"Your navigation skills are the ones that don't work. Quiet frankly, I would have Perona make the deliveries if you weren't so incapable of making arrangements."
Zoro glared, but he wasn't about to deny that one. Plus, it wasn't like he wanted to argue that he was real good at making flower arrangements anyways.
"Try to be back within two hours this time. I want you to deliver the ones that are ordered later in the day before your shift is over."
He only nodded and left, checking the computer again to see the places where he had to go. He recognized a familiar name. Nami. Even he didn't need his GPS to find her.
Of all the chicks that Sanji guy sent flowers to, she was probably the one who got the most annoyed by the arrangements. He walked into the bank where she worked and headed to where her desk was. She looked up with her customer friendly smile and then realized it was just Zoro so she went back to her normal face. She gestured to the corner of her desk and then to the two chairs in front of her desk.
He placed the Daisy Wonders down gently on her desk where she had pointed to. He then took a seat, delighting in the fact that he didn't have to say the obligatory, "a delivery for you!" lines to her, since she told him never to do it again since the first time. He had taken a liking to her since then, though they got into the occasional argument.
"Sanji again?" She asked dully, writing something down on paper.
"Who else sends you these huge flower arrangements?"
She frowned. "I wouldn't mind if it were from someone else."
She lifted her head from her work and looked it over and opened the card, reading it before giggling and handing it to Zoro to read. He leaned back in his chair and pretended to read it for the first time. After re-reading it he chuckled. "Why does he call you a swan all the time?"
She shrugged. "Beats me. He just does." She filed the paper away and sat there looking bored again.
He made himself comfortable; having sat there so many times, her boss didn't even care anymore. He and Nami would chat most days, unless it was busy and she waved him away, but the bank was pretty empty. "So how many more orders you gotta make today?"
"You're the last one for now," he took off his baseball cap and scratched his hair. "But I gotta head back soon, my boss called saying they had some orders while I was gone, so I gotta deliver those."
She smiled. "Sounds fun, driving around. Better than being in an office all day."
Zoro smirked. "But you're surrounded by money all day."
She laughed. "You got a point there." She then looked at Zoro. "Has he delivered anything to Robin recently?"
After delivering flowers to her and Robin so many times he had found out they were friends, close friends actually. He hadn't known until Nami invited him to go drinking one night and Robin had met them at the bar. From there he hung out with them regularly, never meeting this Sanji guy once. Nami often wanted to get a break from him, though it did make Zoro a little curious about him.
"Last time was two weeks ago, why do you ask?"
"She started dating some guy, just curious if he still sent her flowers. But her birthday is coming up, so I figured he might have placed an order for that."
"He probably will," he mused, then he smirked at Nami. "Maybe you should get a boyfriend, then he'll stop sending you so many flowers."
She rested her chin in her palm. "Nah, I like being single. It means I get to flirt with who ever I want," she giggled and stuck her tongue out at him.
He shook his head and stood, picking up his cap and putting it back on. "I should go," he looked at her and couldn't help but tease. "Same time next week?"
Nami groaned, turning back to her computer and waving a hand, not even looking at him. "Bye Zoro."
Shanks walked in, waving at Zoro wildly with that huge grin of his that made Zoro wonder how he could be so happy. Zoro waved back, it was his boss after all; Kuraigana Bouquets was owned by both Mihawk and Shanks. Shanks walked over to him and asked Zoro how he was doing, as Zoro was in the middle of mopping the floor. After the usual greeting Shanks made his way to his and Mihawk's office.
The only thing that made Zoro more curious as to why he was always so happy was how he was friends with old Hawk eyes. They were nothing alike, and yet, they were best friends. Though he sometimes had suspicions that that wasn't the entire story. Shank's son walked in later, waving madly just like his old man and running up to Zoro. "Hey Zoro!"
Zoro looked him over. "Are you ever in school?"
"I go!" He argued, which did little to make Zoro think otherwise.
Zoro nodded. "Sure. I see you here almost every week."
Luffy smiled, hugging Zoro's middle. "But it's always fun to hang out with Zoro!"
Zoro smirked. "Wanna help me make deliveries?' He didn't even have to ask; he knew Luffy would say yes no matter what.
"Yosh! It's always fun to ride in your car!"
"Yeah, just don't stick your head out the window this time, you almost took out that lady's side mirror."
"But she was the one driving too close to your lane," he said, looking at him with a stern look. "It was her fault."
"Whatever, just keep your head inside the car; I don't need your brother calling me asking me why you almost died and whether or not you behaved."
"Ace worries too much."
"Not enough really."
"Zoro! Get over here!"
Zoro raised an eyebrow, wondering why Shanks was calling him. He hoped he wasn't calling him in to compare muscle definition again. He shuddered at the memory. He walked into their office, Luffy behind him. "You called?"
Shanks was hunched over Mihawk who was sitting in his black leather chair, looking a little annoyed that Shanks was hovering over him. They were both staring at the computer screen on Mihawk's desk, Shanks' eyes squinting as he stared, Mihawk giving the screen a hard glare. When Shanks spotted Zoro he waved a hand at him, beckoning him closer. "Come look at this."
Zoro hesitated in taking a step closer. "It's not porn is it?" he asked warily, Luffy looked wide-eyed as he looked over Zoro's shoulder.
Mihawk shot him an angry look while Shanks laughed his ass off, slapping Mihawk's back in good humor, moving Mihawk back and forth a bit when he did so. "Not this time kid, come take a look."
Zoro, relieved he wasn't going to see naked people again, stepped in behind Mihawk and peered at the screen. Luffy decided he couldn't see so he climbed on Zoro's back to get a better look.
"That's the Kuraigana Bouquets' website, what about it?" he asked, looking at Shanks.
Shanks shook his head. "This is supposed to be a website for a flower shop! Why does it look so dark and gloomy?"
Zoro cast a gaze at Mihawk, and then all eyes went to him. "I designed it a while back," he said, looking angry with all the attention he was getting. "There's nothing wrong with it."
"It's for a flower shop!" Shanks cried out, motioning to the screen.
"We have already established that."
"It's supposed to look more," he paused, looking for the right word. "Floral, isn't it?"
"There's a rose in a corner," Mihawk stated, pointing to the screen. Zoro had to agree he made a point.
Shanks' mouth dropped. "But the background is all black, and there's only one rose and its blood red. It should look friendly," he was waving his hands in the air, trying to make emphasis on his words. "And maybe a little gayer."
"Gayer?" Mihawk gave him a look, his thin eyebrow inching higher on his forehead.
"Happy. And that kind of gay too, I mean it looks like a layout an emo kid would have for his live journal or something."
Mihawk considered this for a moment, when Luffy cut in. "Yeah! It should have white! And pink!" he was trying to climb higher on Zoro's back to give his input. "And yellow and red!"
Zoro grunted and Luffy scrambled behind him, it was like having a monkey on his back. "Quit squirming back there."
Mihawk stared the screen with an intense stare, then looked at Shanks. "I suppose you want to fix it."
Shanks practically beamed. "Oh you thought of me! How sweet! Of course I'll do it! Anything for a pal!" he said, punching Mihawk's arm, who didn't have a reaction to it at all.
"Just have it ready as soon as you can," Mihawk said, then looked to Zoro. "Do you have suggestions Roronoa?"
Zoro shrugged. "Just make easy tabs for making an order and make the number and directions here real noticeable, I always get calls from stupid people."
Shanks put an arm on Mihawk's shoulders. "I can do that!"
"Oh," Zoro said, almost as an afterthought. "And don't ask Perona for help. She'll just tell you to make it all pink."
Shanks nodded. "Got it."
Luffy's arm that was around Zoro's neck tightened in excitement. "Oh! Can I help?"
"Of course you can!" Shanks smiled.
Mihawk and Zoro felt a little worried.
That night, the three of them sat on the couch watching a movie that Mihawk had rented. Zoro and Perona had been in his room, Perona walking in like she usually did to talk when Mihawk ordered the two of them to watch it with him. Perona always got excited about movie night, something Zoro couldn't say for himself. Mihawk's taste in movies was so bizarre and unlike his own.
Zoro sat there in the middle of the couch between the two, grumbling and a little disturbed when he shouldn't be, since he had seen the sight so many times.
On his left, Mihawk was in his fluffy wine red robe again, his arm positioned on the armrest and looking like a stone statue while holding his red wine in hand. On the right Perona was sitting in her shorts and a tank top, a pajama set that had teddy bears on them, with her feet curled under her as she leaned on Zoro.
The only thing the two of them had in common was that their faces were covered in some green stuff, which Perona explained was an exfoliating facial cleanser. Zoro had no problem with Perona having it on her face, she was a woman after all, but Mihawk was a different story. They had their faces completely covered in it, the skin around their eyeballs untouched. But Mihawk had a little border around his beard; and it made him look really, really weird.
Perona had tried to convince Zoro to put on the facial cleanser as well, claiming it would be good for his skin, but he was firm in his repudiate. There was no force on earth that would ever convince him to put that shit on his face, no matter how much it would, 'help his pores.'
Zoro crossed his arms over his chest, watching the previews before the movie started, looking over to see the black cat on Mihawk's lap. He hated that cat. It was bad enough it was named Dracula, but that cat seemed like the spawn of the devil its self. Perona thought it wasn't cute enough and when she tried to put a pink collar on its neck it scratched her arms and hissed at her before disappearing around a corner. Since that day Perona hated him too.
Half its tail was missing; it walked with a limp, hissed at anyone except Mihawk and seemed to see right through your very soul. It had been run over by every car in the state and still managed to survive. It was a black furry cockroach. It was pure evil, but for some reason it was really loyal to Mihawk.
Mihawk had his regular stone face as he stroked the cat, who looked just as deadly at its owner. It gave Zoro the creeps. Zoro turned his head away and tried to pay attention to the screen, wondering why Mihawk didn't watch this with Shanks instead of them. He was sure Shanks would love watching it with him, so Zoro wasn't all too sure why Mihawk insisted that he watch, I Love You Phillip Morris.
It was the first time Mihawk had picked a movie remotely close to romance. Usually he picked horror or dramas, but this movie was a bit comical too, something Zoro hadn't expected. Jim Carrey's character, Steven Russell, reminded him of Usopp a little.
Even Zoro had to smirk when Cleavon played the song Chance's Are after Phillip Morris paid him ten dollars and cussed at the guards when they yelled at him to turn it off. "NO MOTHERFUCKER! MY WORD IS MY BOND BITCH!"
The phone was ringing. Again. It hadn't even been five minutes since that last call. He gritted his teeth. He hated answering the phone. Ever since the website had been down, Shanks declaring it would be the world's prettiest and best website the world had ever seen, the world would weep upon seeing it (it seemed Luffy had invited Usopp over one too many times), Zoro had been answering phone calls all day.
He answered the phone, much to his dislike. "Kuraigana Bouquets. This is Zoro speaking, how may I help you?"
"Oh hey," it was another male voice. "I wanted to order some flower arrangements for a beautiful woman, but I noticed your website was down."
"It's under construction now," Zoro repeated for the billionth time that day. "But we are still taking orders sir." He had checked the site himself, it very clearly said orders could still be taken, and the number was just below. But for some reason people still mentioned the site was down. As if Zoro wouldn't know.
"Excellent. It's her birthday on Thursday and I wanted to give her a spectacular arrangement, one only meant for her."
Zoro furrowed his eyebrows, somehow this cheesy-ness he was hearing was familiar to him. "Well we have birthday specials, Roses, Daisies and Lilies are popular. We also have pink carnations, chicks love those."
"No!" the guy on the other end said suddenly. "It has to be special!" He sighed, "I can't do this, I need to see the arrangements myself."
"Sir, you could always come in. Our directions are listed on the website."
"What time do you close?"
Zoro tried not to bark at the idiot, for that too was listed. "5:00 p.m."
"Hmm, I think I can make it before then. Kay, that's all bye," and hung up.
Zoro went back to work making deliveries here and there. He managed to make them all before 4:30, which gave him plenty of time to clean up before closing.
He was mopping the floor when he saw a suited blond walk his way to the entrance. Zoro cursed under his breath, he was hoping no more customers would come in before closing. He had spent all day talking to customers, and he really hated talking.
He was overly relieved, he managed to make it on time. It was 4:36, twenty-four minutes before closing. He had to speed through the freeway to get there, but it was worth it to get Robin the best flower arrangement ever.
It looked like a nice enough place, it was small but well kept. The exterior was white, the place looking like a giant gazebo with walls. There were pots all around the outside and with some flowers hanging from the roof. He smiled and made his way to the door, seeing a guy moping the floor.
He could see him clearly; mopping and his head turned a bit to look at the back of the store. He was pretty tall, probably his height or taller. Sanji raised an eyebrow at the guy's appearance. He had green hair for starters, and three earrings dangling form his left ear, and on the bulky side. What he was doing working at a flower shop when he looked like he would be better working in a fitness store or a junkyard, he couldn't say.
He walked in between the pillars, noticing they had rolling steel doors instead of traditional doors, and heard the guy bark over his shoulder. "I can see that Mihawk!" He then put the mop aside and made his way over to greet him like nothing had happened. "Hi. Welcome to Kuraigana Bouquets. What can I do for you?" he asked, looking like he wanted to do anything at the moment but help him.
The guy was wearing combat boots and a white t-shirt with the words, 'Violence' written across his chest. Was the place in so desperate need of a worker they hired Rambo? And he didn't notice until he was close, but he had a pretty nasty scar going down his left eye. The color in his left eye was a little duller than his right, but not by much. He wondered if he could see out of it.
Sanji shook his head and managed a smile, always the polite one. "I called earlier about the birthday arrangements, I was wondering if I could take a look at them."
The guy looked so dead serious, like he had nothing in life to make him the least bit excited. He only nodded and walked towards the desk where the register was. "You can take a look at the book if you want. There's more of a selection there than the ones we have in the display rack."
Sanji followed him, taking note that the guy was an inch taller than him. Damn. But he still had no idea what this guy was doing working here. The seaweed head took out a book and flipped it open, then pointed to the page. "These are the birthday arrangements, but you could get ones from the different sections, weddings and what not, you just need to change the card."
"Well duh," he smirked, then looked down.
He could tell the guy wanted to cause him bodily harm at the comment but had controlled himself. He ignored him and looked at all the arrangements, then began to mutter to himself. "No, these won't do. She deserves much better."
He flipped a page. "My beautiful Robin-chan deserves something more special than this."
At the words Robin-chan Zoro knew who was in the store. It was the famous 'prince' himself. He had to contain his chuckles. Sanji kept flipping through the pages, then found one he liked. "I like this, but could you get a purple vase? That's Robin-can's favorite color."
Zoro nodded. "Yeah, it costs like five bucks more, but you could do that."
"Anything for my lovely Robin-chan!" Sanji smiled, clasping his hands together with a love struck look on his face.
Zoro could see why Nami groaned whenever she received flowers from the guy, he was really annoying. And loud. He would get along well with Perona. Zoro took out the planner, which was used to write down the information he needed. "This is for Robin I presume," he smirked. "Where do you want it delivered?"
"At her job, 458 Garden Oasis, same city and zip code as here."
Zoro nodded, writing it down. "What do you want written on the card?"
"Dearest Robin-chan," Sanji sighed, and continued to sprout total bullshit left and right, making Zoro write everything down even though Zoro glared at him in a vain attempt to get him to stop. And again, he signed it 'Prince.'
Zoro's hands hurt by the end of it. "It's gonna come out to $86.34. How do you want to pay?'
Sanji took out his wallet. "Debit card." He paid, and waited for his receipt, eying the green haired guy. He wasn't able to contain his curiosity any longer so he blurted out. "You don't look like the flower kind of guy."
The guy eyed him. "I'm not."
"Do you," Sanji paused. "Make the arrangements?" he inquired.
The guy burst into laughter. "No way!" he took a moment to catch his breath. "I make the deliveries. Perona, she's in the back," he stuck a thumb towards the behind the register. "She makes the arrangements."
Sanji sighed, then laughed himself. "That's good. I was worried for the arrangement. No offense."
The guy smirked. "Don't worry about it."
Sanji liked this guy; he was real easy going despite the gruff exterior. He stuck out a hand, "Sanji."
Zoro almost told him 'I know' when he realized how creepy that would have sounded he stuck out his hand. "Zoro."
They stood there shaking hands and smiling at each other when Mihawk then chose to walk out of his office. He eyed them both, then turned away, making the situation seem more awkward that it really was. They quickly let go of each other's hands.
Sanji coughed. "That your boss?"
Zoro was staring at the direction where Mihawk had left. "Yeah. Ignore him, he's just," he paused. "Strange."
"Says the one with green hair." Sanji chuckled.
"At least I don't have funny eyebrows," Zoro said, almost in disinterest.
"Excuse me?" he snapped, not believing someone would say something like that to a customer.
Zoro looked at him in the eye, looking at him like he thought he was completely stupid. "You heard me."
Sanji gritted his teeth. "You have no right to insult my looks! You dress like G.I. Joe and work at a flower shop!"
He was starting to take back what he had previously thought about liking the guy. He was such a rude asshole. And talk about sensitive. He had said the hair thing as a joke. Though he was just as sensitive about his eyebrows, but that was different.
Zoro glared. "And I suppose you think you're all high and mighty, Mr. Prince?"
Sanji hated the way Zoro had said prince, in that mocking tone. It hurt more because he was the only person to ever call him that, even if he was making fun of him.
"Don't call me that! Only the ladies can call me that!"
Zoro snorted. "Yeah, I'm sure there's flocks of them calling you that."
"What would you know you tasteless bastard!?"
"More than you pretty boy."
"Shove it you steroid injected freak!"
"Make me you scrawny wimp."
"Oh that's it! I'm kicking your ass!" he tapped his shoes on the cement floor, ready to aim his kick at that ugly green hair of his.
"I'll love to see you try blondie."
As soon as he finished saying that his eyes widened and he took a step back. Sanji's foot would have dislocated his jaw if Zoro hadn't moved. The blond seemed pretty pissed that he had missed and aimed another kick at his face, but this time Zoro had time to block rather than dodge.
This guy was fast. Zoro beat him on strength, but this skinny assed twerp was faster, only by a little though. Sanji gritted his teeth when the kick that was supposed to shatter Zoro's ribs was caught. Zoro was smirking when he caught his ankle in a death grip and pushed back a little, almost playfully, making Sanji lose his balance.
Sanji growled and jumped in the air, ready to kick the side of his head. Zoro's eyes widened again and moved entirely out of the way, making Sanji crash into a shelf with three arrangements on them. He was on the ground, nursing a headache as Zoro glared down at him. "Look what you did!"
"Zoro! What did you do?" Sanji turned to see a beautiful pink haired woman gawking at them. She walked to Zoro. "You completely made a mess!" She pointed to the heap on the floor, ignoring Sanji.
"Me? It was that asshole starting fights!" He yelled, pointing at Sanji.
Sanji stood up and ran to Perona, taking her hand and kissing it, practically drooling on her. She looked just as disgusted as Zoro felt. "I'm so sorry to cause such a mess madame. How terribly rude of me." He smiled, "To make up for it I can prepare you a wonderful meal made by moi."
She yanked her hand away, taking a step back. "No way." She looked more than a little freaked out, clutching her coffin shaped purse closer to her.
"Are you sure? I can make anything you like," he rambled on. It was really giving Zoro a headache. He clearly didn't get the message.
Perona looked at Zoro, asking for help. He shrugged, not really able to do anything to stop the senseless idiot so she walked over to where he was and grabbed his arm, then looked at Sanji. "No thanks," she stated, and gestured her head at Zoro. "I don't think he would like that."
Sanj's face fell and it took all of Zoro's will to not laugh at him then and there. He had been upset that Perona had pretended they were dating, but it was worth it to see the blonde's crestfallen face. Sanji fixed his jacket, then bowed to Perona. "Forgive me." Then he looked at Zoro and sneered, it kind of reminded Zoro of Dracula, just, without the hissing.
He straightened himself out. "So it'll be delivered on Thursday, right?"
Zoro nodded. "Yeah."
Sanji nodded, bidding goodbye to Perona and completely ignoring Zoro and walked out the store. Perona and Zoro stood there, their arms still linked, looking as Sanji made his way to his car, stopping every step or two to whistle at the women walking past him on the street.
"What as that all about?" Perona asked, staring at the retreating form.
They both stared until Sanji got in his car and drove away, both silent over the entire ordeal.
"You can let go of my arm now."