I do not own Kim Possible, or any Disney character. This is a story told for entertainment purposes only.
Kim Possible: Small Victories
She stared grimly at the monitor as the familiar face of her longtime foe stared back in smug arrogance.
"You might as well give up, Miss Possible," Drew Lipsky, AKA Dr. Drakken smirked. "For this time, the victory is mine. And mine alone! I, Dr. Drakken, the greatest criminal genius….."
"In his own mind, anyway," a sardonic voice remarked from off-screen.
"Do you mind!"
"I'm just saying….."
"Zip it, Shego, I'm having a moment here."
Kim Possible rolled her eyes as Dr. Director looked on at the monitor with her, her single eye searching for clues even as they awaited the inevitable 'master plan' of the week the blue-skinned lunatic was unveiling this time.
"Fine, fine. Finish the rant. Me, I'm already bored," that familiar voice grumbled from off-screen again. "Call me when you're actually doing something. Or trying to do something."
"Sounds like nothing has changed," Dr. Director murmured as Drakken glared off to his left, then faced the camera again.
"As I was saying, you might as well give up. This time, I have a plan that not only brings the world to its knees…..! Uh, proverbial knees, of course, not it's real ones. Because the world is a globe, and doesn't have….."
"Ugh! Will you get on with it already," came the shout.
"I thought you were bored, and silent! Especially silent! Honestly, good help is so hard to….."
The flash of green fire had the man ducking out of view for a moment, and then he reappeared, looking more than a bit singed, but still smug.
"Now, as I was saying….."
"Just get on with it, Drew," Kim snapped. "I'm sympathizing with Shego here, and that's not something I usually do."
"I heard that," the singsong reply came through the transmission.
Dr. Director rolled her eye.
"Fine. Meh. Save me from snippy women," he grumbled. "The point of this warning is this, Kimberly Anne. Either retire, immediately, or the world is doomed! Doomed! For I, Dr. Drakken, have created the most awesomely horrifical doomsday weapon of all time. Best of all, you will not find it. Or me. You will only die with all the other people who foolishly thwarted me in the past!"
"You're kidding. That's it," Kim asked. "Another stupid doomsday weapon!"
"One you can't find. Or stop. Just as you won't be able to stop me, because you won't be able to find me before I, Dr. Drakken…!"
"We know who you are, Lipsky," Dr. Director cut in. "Just what are your demands? Your….reasonable demands?"
"Just as I said. Kim Possible retired. Permanently. The world on its knees. Proverbially. And all power given to me! Dr. Drakken!"
The man smiled coldly as he eyed them, and wagged a finger at them through the camera. "And if you waste time looking for my newest, most secret, cleverly constructed lair, you'll only seal your doom. Yours, and the world's," he ranted.
"But, won't you die, too," Kim asked him rationally.
"Please. As if I wouldn't take precautions against that happening," he huffed. Then added, "Especially after that last close call." Then the monitor went dark.
"Sounds like he hasn't changed," Ron murmured from behind the two women. "So much for all that tax-payer's money spent on his rehab."
"Contrary to certain opinions, you cannot cure madness. Or megalomania."
"But we can stop it," Kim told Dr. Director. "I'll see what Wade found out from that broadcast, and shut him down before supper."
"Good luck. I'm afraid I couldn't pick out anything in the image that suggested a starting point. It was all prefab Henchco gear so far as I could tell."
"We really need to shut Jack down some day," Ron suggested.
"Technically, he's not breaking any laws," the head of Global Justice reminded him. "Which means we can't arrest him. We can't even give him a parking ticket."
Ron's expression suggested otherwise.
"Not even if he double-parked," he asked pointedly.
"Ron. Not now," she said, and activated her Kimmunicator. "We have to stop Drakken. Before he does manage to make good on this threat."
"You never did tell me where this super-secret lair is," Shego drawled as they lounged on the beach of the private, South Sea island where they were currently laying low. An island so small it wasn't even on any charts, and was far removed from any shipping lanes. Which meant it was a sure bet no one was going to find it anytime soon.
Especially with Drew's electromagnetic umbrella thingy shielding it from casual detection, and keeping anyone from even seeing it even if an aircraft flew over just now.
"Ah, but that is all part of my most brilliantest plan ever, my dear," he grinned, handing her a iced drink before he took his own chair again to sigh as he settled back, staring out at the calm seas.
"Brilliantest? Honestly, Doc, sometimes you sound like a first grader. A really dim one."
"What are you, the grammar police? Besides," he smiled, settling his sunglasses in place as he lay back, letting the sun bake his bared flesh. A vice he had found rather appealing since the mutagen had altered his metabolism, and turned him into a hybrid plant-host. "The fact is, that this time, I, Dr. Drakken, have finally beaten Kim Possible," he declared imperiously even as he remained utterly relaxed next to Shego's own chaise lounger.
"How do you figure that," she huffed. "You haven't done anything. We haven't done anything."
"Ah, but don't you see," Drakken turned to eye her smugly over the rims of his dark glasses. "That is the beauty of this plot. How long ago did I warn Miss Possible and company of my new plot?"
Shego murmured thoughtfully as she made the realization.
"Almost…..two weeks ago now."
"And have you seen any signs of those annoying do-gooders?"
"Well, no. But they aren't going to find this island. Even her Nerdlinger and all his satellites couldn't find it thanks to that gizmo you built."
"Exactly," he crowed, stabbing a triumphant finger at the sky. "Two weeks, and those champions of justice are still running about seeking a lair that they can never hope to find, to stop a weapon they can never hope to stop. Which means, this time, I win," he crowed, pausing to suck his drink through a straw.
Shego sat up, gaping.
"How can you be so sure?"
Drakken smiled all the more now.
"Well, I might have left a few prerecorded messages on a timed transmitter that just happens to have an utterly random, suborbital flight path I recently launched into the sky before we embarked on our little vacation, my dear," he smirked before pausing to sipping his drink. "The sort to keep the heroic sort more than interested, but utterly clueless."
"Wait, wait, wait," Shego shook her head now. "And just how do you know they won't find the lair, or the weapon? Especially with us here, and no one around to watch it. Unless you left someone….?"
"Not at all. The lair, and the weapon, are beyond discovery, because…. I haven't built them yet. They are safely tucked away here," he said, tapping his head. "So, you see? Just as I said, they are in the one place where even Possible, and that annoyingly nameless friend of hers can never find," he smirked, setting his glass aside.
Shego sniggered. Then chuckled. Then fell back laughing.
"What? What," Drakken asked as he peered over his glasses at her.
"Doc! That's…..! That's…..!"
He frowned, waiting for the inevitable insult as she burst into fresh laughter.
"Look, Shego. I'm just saying….."
"It's brilliant," she screeched. "It's so brilliant that I can't believe you thought it up!"
"Well, I am an evil genius," he grumbled, but looked mollified as he closed his eyes now, and smiled at his own thoughts.
"So, Kimmie and the monkey master are out there running around looking for a doomsday weapon that doesn't even exist? That is…..priceless," she laughed again, and lay back on her own lounger, her green figure filling out her green and black bikini perfectly. What there was of it.
"Precisely," he replied smugly. "For once, I win."
"So," Shego asked, stretching indolently under the sun like a great cat. "How long do you think we can milk this one?"
"Hmmmmm. Well, we've already gotten two weeks. If I were to tweak my orbiting transmitter, I could send a sonic pulse to annoy someone….somewhere. That should be good for another week. If we are lucky….. I think we could even manage another three weeks. Minimum."
"You think," Shego asked incredulously.
"C'mon, Shego," he chortled now. "We both know how 'Little-Miss-Perfect hates to quit. If we keep a potential threat out there for her to chase, she'll be running around chasing us for the next year!"
"True, true. You know, this could seriously count as your most evil plan ever, Doc. I like," she beamed as she reached for her own glass again. "We need more plans like this one."
Drakken only smiled, and behind the cover of his dark glasses, eyed his companion's shapely body. "I'm already thinking up my next big scheme," he assured her, remembering not to drool.
He wasn't sure his tongue had quite healed after the last time she caught him.
Still, now that he had so obviously impressed his partner-in-crime, he was certain it was only a matter of time before she saw him as more than just an employer. Meanwhile, he just had to keep that annoying redhead sidetracked, and out of his hair.
Just a few more small victories like this one, he reasoned, and he was sure to finally make Shego realize that he was the man for her.