1. The Ladies All Agree
"He said what now?" Mercedes demanded, sitting on the edge of Kurt's bed, watching as the boy paced nervously back and forth in front of her.
"Gas pains. That's what he compared it to, Mercedes, gas pains!" He let out a sigh of exasperation and fell back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. "How am I ever going to get him if my sexy faces look like I'm having gas pains? He's probably laughing at me right now. Rewatching the video and laughing."
"Kurt, I don't understand. You're - I gotta go," she said, adding the end to avoid embarrassment. "I'll text you, ok? I swear, everything's going to work out." And she stormed out of the room, leading Kurt to believe he'd said something wrong somewhere along in his rant, causing him to feel even worse. He replayed the performance in his head and turned bright red out of humiliation. Great.
"Wait, what?" Mercedes had rallied all the girls in the glee club for an impromptu meeting at Rachel's house to discuss what Kurt had just told her.
"Yeah. Blaine doesn't think Kurt is sexy! Can you believe that?" Mercedes looked out at all the faces. Santana's was shock mixed with pissed, Brittany looked honestly confused, which wasn't unusual. Tina had one eyebrow raised and her mouth wide open. Rachel was letting out occasional humorless chuckles, and Quinn was bright red.
"Since day one I've been asking around for Blaine's 'straight copy.' However, when I first laid eyes on Kurt during that Push It number, I whispered the same thing to Britt. The freshman are constantly swooning over in Cheerio's practice and I have to inform them of his flaming homosexuality, which actually caused one girl to burst into tears, which I found hilarious. That boy is fine, and he can work the sexy. What is the matter with the hobbit?" Santana exclaimed, and Brittany nodded.
"I know! That's one of the reasons I had a crush on him in the first place. Actually, that was about eighty percent of the reason-"
"His lips are so soft." Everyone turned to look at Brittany in shock. "What? It's the truth."
"Brittany, how do you-"
"Irregardless, we need to do something. Any ideas, girls?"
Rachel shot her hand up and Mercedes reluctantly called on her. "I say we all show him one video of Kurt's many admittedly sexy performances, which I wouldn't usually say considering he's capital G gay, but the innocence somehow makes it even better…anyway, we each show him one video, and guaranteed by the end he will be drooling at Kurt's feet. Are we all in agreement?" Everyone nodded and Rachel smiled triumphantly.
"So it's decided."
I don't find Chris Colfer particularly sexy, just because, um, *cough*, girl here. However, I will admit he can be sultry at times and while it fails to turn me on I do see how it could have that effect on people.
I feel kinda bad about the Santana line. I just can't write her well. Oh well! Hope you enjoy this so far, and I have a favor to ask:
I'm going to take requests for this story, so whatever video you want to see Blaine watch and who shows it to him, just tell me in a review and I'll most likely write it in. Unless it's like "have Tina show Blaine 'Gold Digger'," because he was still in awkward-dancing territory at that point. Oh, how I love him. :P
And it's gotta be realistic. Like, he could see 4 Minutes, for example, because it was a pep rally and someone could easily have filmed it. Same with Empire State of Mind, because they did it in the courtyard. Someone could've filmed that and posted it online thinking they were embarrassing them or something. But asking for Rose's Turn probably wouldn't be very realistic, unless someone else was watching too and filmed it. But now that I'm thinking about it, Blaine seeing Rose's Turn would be all kinds of awesome...
Until next time!