I wanted to write a fic with Fem!Allen. Don't ask. This has been sitting in my FANFIC folder for a while, and now that my computer is fixed I could upload it.

Well, ok… This idea came after a conversation I had with a fantastically-in-character Lavi cosplayer in a comic store. We somehow got onto the topic of 'who would have the bigger boobs out of Fem!Allen and Fem!Kanda?'

The Kanda cosplayer was not pleased, lol. *And he thought I was a guy at first. How absolutely ironic, Mr. She-male.*

Contains KandaxFem!Allen with some LavixLenalee on the side.

Anyways, here we go. Standard disclaimer applies. I proof-read this myself, so mistakes may occur. :(


Kanda Yuu was not, and never had been, an expert on women. Unfortunately for him, the lady in his life seemed to have turned from a bipolar angel into a full-time neurotic witch in the space of maybe a month.

It could have been alright, had Kanda just kept out of her business and ignored her strange behaviour, but… last night, Alanna 'Allen' Walker had just gone too far.

She'd denied him sex.

Kanda had just been on the way to removing her form-fitting work blouse when the young woman had pushed him into the wall, thrown a Miranda-esque spazfest and refused to talk to him for the rest of the day. For some reason, the dinner Allen prepared that evening had been especially good, perhaps to compensate for something? That had left Kanda both confused and very, very frustrated.

If he'd ever thought that the situation couldn't get any worse, he now had an obnoxious ginger rabbit playing counsellor to him in the middle of Starbucks.

"Did you violate her in any way?" Lavi was rambling, emptying dangerous amounts of sugar into his drink. "Man, you know that Allen is totally touchy about public molestation! Yuu-chan, how could you-"

"I didn't do anything, you fucking rabbit! Shut the hell up before that coffee ends up on your face! And my name is Kanda!"

"… Whoa." Lavi commented, raising his open hands both in a gesture of defeat and to shut his temperamental Japanese frenemy up before they attracted any more dirty looks. Mouth soap for the Asian, anyone? "So she just turned down an amazing fuck and ran off?"

"How many damn times do I have to repeat this shit?" Kanda ground out, biting into his biscotti with a loud crack. Lavi didn't mention that you were actually supposed to dip it in the coffee first to avoid breaking your teeth, but apparently Kanda's were indestructible anyway.

The redhead sighed tiredly, stirring his latte with his spoon. "Maybe it's not you. Maybe she's got a problem that she just isn't telling you about…"

Kanda's glare suddenly hardened, and his expression became stiff. Working out instantly what was going through his friend's mind, Lavi waved his hands frantically. "I-I'm sure that's not it, Yuu! She'd never do that!" the 'rabbit' tried desperately, wanting to defend his white-haired friend. "She went through blood, sweat, tears and some pretty unmentionable crap to make herself noticed to you! Don't j-jump to conclusions!"

Kanda hated to admit it, but Lavi was right. At the same time, he also hated to admit that he was actually having an in-depth conversation about his girlfriend in public. With Lavi.

"I'm going." The taller man snapped, rising from his seat and slinging his coat over his shoulders; his pride couldn't suffer any further.

Lavi pouted. "But aww, Yuu-chan! I'll be all alone! Lenalee's gone out with Al too, so I don't know what to dooo!"

"If you've got nothing else to do but molest your bosses' little sister all day, then I despair for your life." Kanda replied sarcastically, and then he was gone.

Lavi glanced at the door, then at his coffee, then back at the door. Taking one large sip, he also grabbed his coat and walked out of the café and onto the pavement, instantly following the tall dark-haired figure who was probably doing his best to get away by taking a fast route down the middle of the crowds on the large London road. Lavi smirked, pulling out his phone and locating his fiancée's number in a matter of seconds. He was so getting to the bottom of this.


A pigtailed figure with a concentrated expression slowly rose from her crouched position in a seemingly endless sea of frills and lace. With a victorious look on her face, she presented her find proudly to the person standing behind her.

"What about this one?" Lenalee asked, holding up a particularly daring piece of 'clothing'. Allen went crimson at the mere sight of it, but managed a small smile.

"To be honest, most things in this… shop… would please Lavi." The whitehead admitted, laughing along with her friend as the Chinese girl agreed with her.

Allen Walker didn't really want to be here, but Lenalee just loved to drag her out and strip Allen's feminine side to the bone with lingerie stores, searches for impossible heels and crazily-priced make-up products. Really, Allen didn't mind too much; a ladies' day out was always good to relax, but honestly, all these barely-there bras and see-through panties were not helping her to forget a certain something.

"You look good in pastel colours and lacy stuff." Lenalee observed, looking at her friend with a critical eye. "You have amazing features, and we can't ignore them. How about this for you? I think I'm taking the dark green pair."

Allen looked warily at Lenalee's chosen item and couldn't help the pained look that crossed her face. Unfortunately for Allen, the Chinese girl seemed to be an expert on her in every way.

"Ok, Allen. Tell me what's wrong." Lenalee said, immediately dumping everything she was holding onto the chair next to the changing rooms. "Something is clearly bothering you, and since you only started to get like this once we got in here I'm guessing it's Kanda-related."

Allen gaped at her friend in horror, both at Lenalee's incredible intuition and by their current location. "You're going to give me a counselling session in the middle of Victoria's Secret?"

The darker haired woman didn't seem bothered in the slightest. "Seriously, Allen, I don't want you to be like this. If you can't enjoy yourself, then neither can I!" Lenalee put her hands on her friend's shoulders. Allen bit her lip, guessing that arguing with this persistent woman would be futile.

"I… I… Where's the point in buying something here if I won't even be able to wear it soon!"

Lenalee's eyes went wide. "No way… oh, Allen… you and Kanda didn't break up… did you?"

"NO!" Allen burst out, covering her mouth hurriedly straight after. "That's not it…" she continued in a lower voice. "But I still think he's angry with me… and I haven't even said anything yet… and then yesterday I didn't let him…"

"Allen, honey, you're confusing me." Lenalee said, involuntarily shifting into her mother-hen mode. "Go slow, I'll still listen."

Allen looked up suddenly, a hopeful expression on her face. "Do you think I could blame it on my eating habits, or is a failed metabolism at twenty-one not normal?"

"I beg your pardon?" Lenalee paused, slightly thrown by Allen's seemingly random remark.

"Suddenly getting fat, I mean." Was Allen's flat reply, and then it hit Lenalee like a ton of bricks.

"Oh my God, Allen! Congratulations!" the Chinese girl cried happily, earning herself a confused look from the cashier. "I'm so happy for you! Why didn't you tell me earlier? How far along are you?" Too many questions.

"Lenalee…" Allen choked, trying desperately to escape from Lenalee's tight embrace. Fortunately, the Chinese woman released her soon enough.

"So you haven't told Kanda yet? Ooh, I can't wait to tell Lavi, he'll be so-"

"I think I had a fight with Kanda!" Allen finally managed to cut the other off.

Stalemate. Again. The silence lasted maybe a whole minute, and each second brought Allen closer to tears. Finally, the whitehead broke the silence.

"Fuck these mood swings!" she yelled suddenly, tears leaking from her panicky blue-grey eyes. Lenalee blanched, but Allen wasn't done yet. "L-Lenalee… Y-yesterday I wouldn't let him have sex with me and now I feel so, so bad because I just know that BaKanda takes everything the wrong way and… and…"

Then Lenalee was hugging her friend again, rubbing soothing circles on Allen's back with her hand. "Oh, Al… It'll be ok. I can guess quite well as to why you did that."

"What if he noticed… and thought I was ugly or something! Nobody likes a big woman!"

"That's not true-"

"And I don't even know when it's no longer safe to do it when you've got a baby growing inside you! I don't… I…"

"Allen, how long?"

"U-um… I… th… th-three months. I only really realised that I was changing last week, and I guess I just freaked out…"

"Allen. You're three months pregnant and your boyfriend doesn't have the slightest idea?"

"No…"

"What're you DOING! Kanda's going to have one heck of a panic attack if he works it out by himself! I know that he's the tough macho type and all, but trust me, guys like Kanda go ape shit in situations involving stuff like this! You, as the woman, have to tell him yourself and CALMLY so we can avoid Kanda getting completely run over by his own paranoia!"

"I'm having a hard time imagining a panicky Kanda." Allen deadpanned, not quite believing her friend for once. Lenalee sighed.

"You've seen a doctor, right?"

"Yes-"

"Thank heavens, woman. At least you had the guts to do THAT… wait, Allen…"

The whitehead was looking completely dejected now. "Allen… please, tell me… you do want this baby, don't you…?" Lenalee said slowly, her voice tender.

Allen's eyes shot open wide and she gasped, surprising her friend. "Of course I do!" she cried, looking absolutely horrified. "I'd never-! I couldn't!"

"That's a relief. You had me seriously worried for a second." Lenalee smiled, and took Allen's hand in hers. "But Allen, we're still getting you something. I heard that some men find sex with pregnant women is a serious turn-on."

Suddenly, Allen felt the overwhelming urge to flee.


There was something else that Kanda hadn't told Lavi, but it was none of the rabbit's business and if anyone found out, in his opinion, his pride would be banished forever.

Kanda wasn't really concerned about the huge amount of money he'd given for it. No, he couldn't give a flying fuck about that, really. What bothered him was Allen's behaviour. Kanda, just as Lavi had said, did not believe that his girlfriend was cheating on him. She had been acting very strange recently, that was undeniable; she shied away from his touch and freaked out at the most minor things. However, other than that, she was completely normal. It was seriously unnerving. Kanda wanted to confront her about this stupid issue before he even brought up his plans.

The Japanese thought back to when Allen's real freakish behaviour had begun. It had been maybe a month ago, just after Allen had returned from a business trip with the agency she worked at. After she had promptly raced up to the bedroom and slammed the door shut, Kanda had been left at the door with a concerned young man called Timcampy who had informed him of the stomach bug his partner seemed to have suffered from throughout the trip.

Then the polite blond had left, but not before he'd asked Kanda to wish Allen a fast recovery. When Kanda had reached the bedroom, Allen had just flushed the toilet and was walking out of the en-suite, rubbing her eyes tiredly. She looked exhausted but gorgeous, with her hair slightly unkempt and her topmost blouse buttons undone. That had caused Kanda to approach her and remove her cardigan, not even bothering to ask for permission before he began to kiss her face and daringly grope at her chest. Allen's reaction had been a bit unusual. The moan she let out when Kanda began to touch her breasts was pretty damn loud, and she had squirmed in his arms like a fish out of water, gasping his name almost… fearfully?

"N-no, Kanda, don't-" Allen had tried to argue, but Kanda was having none of it as he pushed her down onto the bed and began to bite at her neck. Since he enjoyed the helpless sounds Allen made when he played with her chest, Kanda continued to do so, finally getting that annoying blouse off and slipping his hands into her bra. "Ah.. ah-n… n-naaAAA!"

That was when Allen had finally escaped, flipping herself over and throwing Kanda's hands away from her in the process. Then she'd grabbed her blouse and stood up, stammering frantically at the now bewildered Japanese. "What are you doing?" Kanda enquired, evidently not pleased. Allen had looked absolutely miserable before she shook her head.

"I-I have to unpack and then I can cook for us and then I can- I don't want you to catch my bug if I still have it!" Then Allen had raced down the stairs in just her trousers and bra, leaving Kanda sitting on the bed with a huge frown on his face. That had certainly deserved the title of a worthy 'WTF' moment.

Kanda frowned much like he'd frowned that month ago. As well as confusing him (which did not happen often) Allen had left Kanda with an unbearable load of sexual frustration to deal with. Finally locating his car, Kanda opened the door and stepped inside, escaping the din of the road outside. Time to get the hell home.


Shaking Lenalee off had been a difficult job, but for some reason after the other woman had received a call she'd said goodbye quite quickly and hurriedly taken off down the road in the direction of the Starbucks she and Allen visited often along with 'the boys'.

The whitehead sighed, stashing her shopping bags in the back seat of her car before she started the motor and began to navigate through the traffic. To be honest with herself, the thought of pregnancy scared Allen shitless. The cravings didn't sound too bad and hadn't started yet (but hey, they'd be a good excuse to eat even more than usual) but the sickness had already left her uncomfortable. Then there was the other factor that Kanda hadn't realised yet.

Allen would have told him that the upstairs bathroom walls really were not the thickest and that could he please go and jerk off downstairs… had she not felt massively guilty every time it happened. Kanda didn't know that Allen suffered from the same problem. Allen was, in fact, drowning in her own hormones and the infamous sex drive that affected some unfortunate women during their pregnancy. As of late, Allen had weirded Kanda out even more by refusing to sleep in the same bed as him some nights; the woman was in secret fear of sleep-humping Kanda or being guilty some other monstrous act of the sort.

Pushing these unwelcome thoughts away, Allen closely resisted the urge to head-slam the steering wheel. The word 'family' sounded absolutely wonderful to her, since her own was slightly odd and divided and she'd never known her real parents. She wanted the family she'd make with Kanda to be fully functional and normal, thank you very much. However, certain people like her godfather Marian Cross would probably be mortified by the thought of Alanna Walker reproducing.

At least Mana and Neah are supportive enough… Allen thought, steering her car into a side road. The brothers, one of which her adoptive father, had been quite kind, although Neah had displayed quite a creepy obsession with the thought of a pregnant adoptive niece; if Mana had not taken pity on the poor girl and stopped him, the man might just have informed the whole rest of his family right at that moment via text.

Allen knew for a fact that her secret was still safe, because she was sure that one certain Road Kamelot would already have a list of 1000+ crazy baby names prepared for her as well as the creepiest toys imaginable.

Allen glanced down at her stomach quickly, cursing the fact that the tiniest bump could now be felt near her stomach.

Lenalee was right. What the hell was she doing, practically at the end of her first trimester and still without having told the father?

… Woah. Kanda. Father. Kanda. Father. That sounded so odd. That was another thing that unnerved Allen. Kanda as a father. She had no idea as to how that would turn out; really, anything could happen, including hell on Earth.

Then there was the other side of the story. The mother. Allen knew that her pregnancy had been completely unplanned, but she wasn't upset. Although she had thrown a fit in the doctor's office at the time they'd accidentally discovered her pregnancy after initially wanting to investigate her unusual arm, a pleasant warm feeling had settled within her once she'd thought it over. A baby, hers and Kanda's.

Allen may have been young, barely into her twenties, but she was not worried. She and Kanda had good jobs, supplied to them by businesses their families owned. They would not lose them any time soon, and they were financially stable; more than ready to take on another family member.

Allen dryly wondered just how long it would take to drill those facts into Kanda's thick skull of he lost it.

Once she had reached her road, Allen parked her car in a matter of seconds (proving the stereotype to be complete bullshit) and unloaded her bags. Kanda was probably still out with Lavi, and if he wasn't with Lavi, he had already gone off to Tiedoll's to deliver the "fucking space-wasting canvas-crap" the man had asked him to drop off.

Tiedoll would undoubtedly drag his adoptive son in for a drink and a pleasant chat; Allen figured she wouldn't be seeing Kanda until about five.

Dumping her bags on the kitchen counter once she was inside, Allen hurriedly made her way upstairs. Once in the bedroom, the young woman removed every single bit of clothing that she was wearing and sighed as she stood in front of her full-length mirror.

She looked completely normal. Mostly. Yes… you could definitely notice that slight swelling now. Allen blushed at the things she was noticing about herself. For example, her nipples seemed to have darkened too; all clear symptoms. The young woman collapsed backwards onto her bed, staring at the ceiling through her parted fingers. One hand strayed to her stomach, slowly sliding over the swelling. It was still somehow alien to the young female. Allen had always been completely flustered by the sex education classes she was forced to endure in her school days, but she had always been fascinated by the idea of creating something that was a combination of two different people. Three years ago, Allen would rather have gone back to live with Cross than to end up knocked up by Kanda Yuu, the most handsome social retard she'd ever met in her life.

Deciding to stress over how she'd tell him when he arrived, Allen focused instead on her shopping bags. Retrieving them from downstairs, she put on the lacy combination that Lenalee had chosen for her. Allen hummed, once again having to admit that Lenalee knew her stuff; she didn't look half bad in the pastel red set.

Suddenly, the sound of the front door opening was heard, and Allen's eyes widened. Leaping off the bed with a silent shriek, she grabbed her dressing gown and flung it on. Trying her best to look calm, Allen made her way down the stairs, peering into the kitchen. Kanda must be in the bathroom or something, because nobody was in there.

Well, except… a selection of items had been dumped on the kitchen table. One of which was Kanda's leather coat and Allen rolled her eyes, making to hang it up on the hooks in the hallway. That was when she spotted the other item on the table; a tiny little bag, pure white with a small logo on it. Allen raised her eyebrows. How random. Kanda didn't usually buy stuff like this.

Allen opened the little bag gently, peering inside and pressing it rapidly shut a second afterwards. No fucking WAY. Allen was so drowned in the sound of her own heart racing that she barely heard Kanda enter the kitchen, the soles of his shoes tapping the pristine tiles loudly.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"YOU KNEW!" Allen cried, pointing at him accusingly, halfway between fury and absolute euphoria. "You knew ALL ALONG and you pretended you didn't so this wouldn't look FORCED!"

Kanda was completely stumped. What on Earth was this hysterical woman going on about? "What the fuck are you on about, moyashi?" he voiced his thoughts. Then he realised that the moyashi seemed to have discovered the little white bag, and he swore inwardly.

"My name is Alanna! Allen! And you know EXACTLY what I'm talking about!" the whitehead argued, looking like she was about to burst into tears. "This is all… just… just so you won't look like a… when they find out…"

Kanda approached her, grabbing her shoulders a little roughly. "Alright, spill it. What the hell is all this about? First I can't even touch you and now you're throwing a bitch fit about something you won't even fucking well explain! AND after you saw what was in the damn bag!"

"When did you order that to be made? It's obviously custom." Allen jabbed her finger at the said bag, a frantic look on her face. Having had enough, Kanda drew his wallet from his pocket, searched through it for a second and slammed a receipt down on the table before he could think about what he was doing. "Four fucking months ago. It kept getting delayed, so I only got it now and now it's arrived you're acting like a total-"

"AAACK-!"

"Moyashi?"

Allen was swatting her hand on front of her face wildly, obviously panicking. "ARE YOU INSANE?" She shrieked after a moment. "YOU SPENT THAT MUCH JUST FOR-"

"For God's sake, woman, who gives a fuck?" Kanda shouted, trying his hardest to stop a blush for creeping onto his face. "I want an answer right now!"

"You really don't know? You didn't realise after all?" Allen said in a small voice, surprising Kanda with her rapid change of mood and her unusually fast defeat in their argument. "And you actually… you…"

"No, I have no fucking idea about any of this crap." Kanda growled, and to his surprise Allen's frown turned into her beautiful, signature smile. The woman leaned forward in Kanda's grip and embraced him, nuzzling his shoulder with her nose.

"I love you." She whispered, small tears leaking from her big eyes. "I love you so much."

"Che."

"I won't put you through the pain of making you go on one knee, either."

Kanda gripped the woman in his arms even tighter, not realising that the close contact allowed Allen to hear just how fast his heart was really going. "Just answer, dammit."

Kanda rolled his eyes as Allen began to sob in his arms. "Not yet." she said stubbornly, despite her tears. "Say it. I want you to say it. Make a woman happy, you stupid man."

Oh, for fuck's sake. "I'm saying this once and once only, baka moyashi, so fucking savour it." Kanda couldn't even look her in the eye. This was so. Fucking. Humiliating. "Will you…"

Allen had a sly smirk on her face now; oh, she was enjoying watching Kanda suffer, and the man knew it. "Will you marry me? There you have it, so be happy already. You manipulative, sly little piece of-"

"Yes." Allen said, her voice steady. "Yes… Yes, BaKanda!" then she was crying again, and Kanda almost resisted the urge to face-palm. Allen must be having a bad day or something, because her moods were absolutely haywire.

As Kanda slipped the heavily priced piece of jewellery onto her finger, Allen didn't know if she'd felt happier in her life. She'd seen how Lenalee had pretty much turned into a sobbing pile of glowing happiness right in the middle of a pricey restaurant when Lavi had proposed (Kanda had left the scene for a bathroom trip, complaining about 'emotional shit' and 'mawkish women') and Allen had quietly wondered what she would be doing if she were in Lenalee's place.

She'd always known that if Kanda proposed, no expensive restaurants or romantic scenarios would be involved. She'd already been absolutely shocked by the amount of money the man had spent on that one engagement ring, but it made her feel undoubtedly special.

Separating herself from the gentle kiss she had given Kanda in thanks, Allen decided that now was the time to break the news. "Kanda… now that I'm your fiancée… I have some news for you, too."

Allen pushed away from Kanda a little, allowing herself to meet his cerulean gaze. Kanda, for some reason, looked a bit worried. "Good or bad news first?"

Kanda frowned. "Whatever this shit is… the bad news."

Obviously…

Allen looked away nervously, biting her lip. "The bad news is that Lavi probably knows about the good news, because Lenalee found out."

"What the hell? That's not a clue." Kanda snapped, but Allen's sudden glare clearly told him to shut up.

"The good news is that… oh fuck. How do they do this again?" While Kanda was trying to register that the moyashi seemed to have dropped the f-bomb outside of the bedroom, Allen appeared to be racking her brains for ideas. "Kanda…" The suspense was, in some way, killing the Japanese man. The British girl was screwing with him, he was sure of it. "Is it… Is it true that pregnant woman can be a turn on?"

"The fuck?" Kanda had, miraculously, understood the string of words that had left Allen's mouth at a breakneck speed. Unfortunately, they made no sense to him.

"You think I'm ugly, don't you? When I'm all fat you won't want to touch me, ever, and I don't think I-"

Information processing.

Information processing complete.

Open file.

Alanna Walker is suggesting a pregnancy.

"Don't gape at me like that! Kanda, I'm pregnant, and have been for three months, ok? I'm so sorry, but I was so afraid to tell you!"

Change in file.

Alanna Walker just confirmed a pregnancy.

Holy fucking shit. I got her… I'm going to be a…

"That's why you wouldn't let me fucking touch you?" Kanda deadpanned, and Allen nodded her lowered head quickly.

"I…"

"It… It IS mine, right…?" Kanda said in a low voice, concern settling into his mind.

Allen looked positively horrified. "What the hell are you suggesting? Of course it's damn well yours, you stupid man!"

"And you still wouldn't let me near you! Woman, you're a fucking idiot."

"H-hey!"

That's why she freaked when she saw the ring…

Allen didn't get a chance to say much else, because Kanda had her pressed against a counter with his mouth blocking her own. Kanda's hands were caressing her face, slowly moving lower as the man ravished her mouth. Allen moaned, realising just how much she'd missed this sort of contact. No form of masturbating could match this, really; not that she'd ever admit to having pleasured herself recently. Then Kanda pulled his trump card, focusing his hands on Allen's breasts. The moan he got from her in response was truly impressive.

"S-sensitive!" Allen groaned into the kiss, involuntarily grinding her hips against Kanda's. To her shame she was horny as hell, and Kanda seemed to have noticed. However, Kanda surprised Allen when he pulled away, a deadly serious expression on his features.

"Do you want it?" he asked

Allen blinked. "Huh?"

"Do you want this kid?" Kanda clarified, shocking Allen with his gentleness when he carefully traced her abdomen with his left hand. "It obviously wasn't planned."

"Of course I do." Allen whispered in reply. "Do… I… you do too, r-right…? Are you…"

"Good, because I wouldn't have it any other way." Before Allen could ask what Kanda meant, she had been lifted up bridal style, albeit roughly.

"O-oi! What're you doing, BaKanda?"

"The only reason you're not flung over my shoulder is because there'd be pressure on your middle, so shut up."

"Ever the romantic." Allen grumbled, letting herself go limp. "Y'know, Lenalee and Lavi are gonna want a joint wedding…"

"Fuck no."

"Fuck yes." Allen snapped. "We'd save money, too."

"Forget that financial bull, you're not anywhere near that damn that man-whore anymore."

Allen winced shortly. "It'd still be nice."

"Che."

As he climbed the stairs, Kanda observed the young woman in his arms. Really, he felt like an idiot for not having noticed earlier. She practically glowed, and when he had felt her in the kitchen he had finally become aware of her growing middle. Three months! Kanda almost felt a bit bad; this was his child, too, and he'd only been able to acknowledge it now that Allen was at the end of her first trimester.

Allen seemed to notice Kanda's softer gaze and placed her arms around his neck as he lowered her onto the bed. "I can't wait." She mumbled, and Kanda smirked.

"For the baby or for the sex?" he asked with a lustful undertone to his voice. Allen chuckled, but then she froze.

"But… won't we hurt the baby if…"

"It's still too early." Kanda told her, hoping he was right. Allen just nodded at him.

"I trust you." He wouldn't tell her, but those words pleased Kanda greatly. Climbing over his now wife-to-be, Kanda began to slide the silky dressing gown from her shoulders. However, once he caught sight of something lacy and pink, he stopped. "Lenalee?" he enquired, giving Allen a curious look.

The young woman just blushed. "Who else?" she answered, embarrassed. "I was just trying it on again, and then you came home."

"She knows what she's doing." Kanda mumbled, starting to kiss at Allen's neck. The whitehead widened her eyes at the rare comment, smiling at Kanda's compliment to her friend. That was all she need to know that Kanda liked what she was wearing.

Then a hand was THERE again. "YAAH! Kanda! Stop assaulting my boobs! That hurts!"

Kanda's grin was predatory. "I guess I owe the baby for making you like this." He teased, and Allen gasped in exasperation.

"That is NOT appr- A-AAH!"

Enjoying how loud Allen was being, Kanda growled lightly when Allen's hands began to slip under his shirt, running over his chest and tickling him gently. However, the growls of pleasure turned into one short growl of anger when a simple ringtone began to sound from somewhere next to him. "Are you fucking kidding me?"

Allen's hands were gone from Kanda's chest in a second, and she shot him an apologetic look before grabbing her phone. "It might be my boss." She explained before picking up the call. Kanda couldn't believe it. "Hello?"

"Moyashi-chan! Guess who?" Kanda almost grinned at Allen's 'oh for fuck's sake' expression.

"Lavi, what do you want? I'm busy." Allen muttered, but the rabbit wasn't put off.

"I heard! I heard! Lenalee told me! And now I have also solved a mystery of my own! Seriously, congratulations, Allen! I'm real happy for ya!" The young woman smiled, warmed by her friend's enthusiasm.

"Thanks La-AAAAAHHNNH!"

"…"

Allen glared at Kanda furiously, holding the phone away from herself. Kanda just 'che'd' and continued his rigorous exploration of Allen's body with both hands and mouth. Well, shit.

"Allen, I hope ya don't mind me asking, but what the FUCK was that?" Lavi's voice was audible from the phone as Allen held it against her ear again.

"Nothing." Was the automatic response.

"Overused." Lavi answered. "You moaned."

Allen sighed loudly, jerking when Kanda began to trace his fingers along her inner thighs. However, the Japanese was fully aware of the evil grin that suddenly crossed the woman's features, and he smirked. Enter Black Allen.

"Ok then, Lavi. I'm about to get wildly fucked into my mattress by the one and only Kanda Yuu, so God have mercy on our baby. By the way, your wedding's gonna be on October 14th, am I right? You can count us in."

And with that, she hung up, but not before hearing Lenalee's ecstatic squeal sounding in the background. Well, damn. She'd been on speaker. "Well done, baka. They'll definitely be on our fucking case now." Kanda scolded, an irritated glare on his face.

"Shut up and fuck me already." Allen snapped in reply, dragging Kanda's face back down to hers by his hair. The Japanese complied, nipping at her lips in a hungry fashion. Allen grinned, squirming beneath him. Oh, she'd been such an idiot. No sex for a month had her wound up like a spring.

Suddenly, Allen gasped loudly as Kanda's mouth was no longer on her mouth but kissing the skin of her abdomen. "Kanda, don't!"

"Stop being such a fucking wimp." Kanda snapped, losing his patience. "Listen here, you idiot. You're beautiful, alright? So don't fucking well think otherwise. This, in here-" Kanda pointed at Allen's middle, "-belongs to both of us, so I don't see why the hell you're so damn embarrassed about showing it to me!"

Allen breathed in deeply, a little hurt by Kanda's harsh tone. "I'm sorry." She whimpered pathetically, cursing her hormones for activating her teary side again. "I was just so afraid that you'd react differently; that you wouldn't want it."

"I just asked you to fucking marry me and you're still worried? What is wrong with you?" Kanda's words were vehement, and Allen looked at him in surprise. He was tense, and breathing a bit too deeply for it to be normal. She knew the man well enough to know that he was actually upset; not that he would ever admit it.

Taking hold of the uncomfortable situation, Allen sat up and pushed Kanda into a seating position. Then she slowly crawled onto his lap and pressed her forehead against his, taking in his heady scent. "I didn't mean for you to take it in that way." Allen whispered. "And I know I'm being stupid. I know that if you love me enough to want to spend the rest of your life with me, you wouldn't care about how I look or how… just… Even if you don't want to say it, it's ok. I'll admit that the way I acted was-"

"I love you."

"K-Kanda?"

"You heard me, idiot. I love you." He sounded fully confident, not like the usual clipped tone he used when he had to comment on his affection towards Allen Walker. "And you're the only one who'll ever hear that, moyashi, so fucking take it in."

And with that, Kanda pulled the young woman in his lap in for another searing kiss, gently sliding the lingerie from her body.


In front of the same Starbucks Lavi had been in with Kanda only a couple of hours ago, Bookman Junior and Lenalee were staring at his mobile phone as if it had just sprouted antennae.

"Holy shit, dude." Lavi mumbled, completely stunned. Lenalee, on the other hand, was still holding her hands before her mouth in barely concealed excitement.

"They're getting married!" she squealed. "I can't believe it!"

"Kanda finally grew a pair." Lavi agreed, still staring. His own fiancée, however, was not impressed by his deadpan expression.

"Lavi, show a little more joy!"

"Excuse me, Lenalee. I had that call on speaker phone. Then Al moaned loudly enough to break said speakers. Everyone stared at us, and hence everyone heard the dialogue that followed. Then we got kicked out because they thought I had called a sex line."

"Well we couldn't have known that they were in bed! Forget that, Lavi!" Lenalee waved him off. "Just picture this; an seven month pregnant Allen in a wedding dress! It's going to look gorgeous! I can't wait to go dress hunting with her! And we'll get married together!"

Lavi just gazed back at the Starbucks wistfully. "Well I just can't wait to have the rest of Allen's mostly bat-shit family crammed into the Church, honestly." Lavi groaned sarcastically, and Lenalee, finally having had enough, kicked him powerfully in between the legs.

"How does permanent contraception sound?" the Chinese woman said evilly, and for a second Lavi could see traces of a certain Komui Lee's expression cross her pretty features.

Yes, only Lavi Bookman was mad enough to actually get as far as marrying this girl.


Apparently, Allen seemed to think that their bedroom was sound-proof, because Kanda had never heard her scream this way before. The woman's skin was damp, glistening with a thin layer of sweat. She was throwing her head from side to side, gasping and emitting lustful keens with every movement Kanda made. Her state fascinated the Japanese man, and he was determined to make the most of it.

The month without sex had actually come with an upside; Allen was unbelievably tight, and Kanda had a hard time controlling himself as not to hurt the delicate young woman through his pleasure. The sounds she made really weren't helping.

Then Kanda blinked, trying to take in what had just happened. A moment ago, he'd been bent over Allen, thrusting into her steadily; now he was lying on his back with Allen putting all her weight on his hips. She was arched over him, her snow-white hair damp with sweat and sticking to her forehead. She was panting, too, red in the face with her tongue pressed to her top lip. Kanda noticed that when she was bent over like that, her tiny bump was slightly exaggerated, looking bigger than it did when she stood. Kanda wasn't sure of he'd ever seen anything hotter in his life.

Then he decided that he had; when Allen moved on top of him and threw her head back with a loud moan, she was the very definition of erotic. Kanda growled, impatient with her slow movement. Grabbing her hips, the man sat up a little, causing Allen to sink down onto him even further. The woman cried out quietly, scraping her nails painfully down Kanda's back. The Japanese man groaned, a guttural sound in the depth of his throat. Bucking his hips up to meet Allen's, he pressed the woman down on him before loosening his grip, helping her to achieve strong but steady thrusts. Allen's hands didn't seem to know where to go; her nimble fingers touched Kanda everywhere, and her small breats bounced gently with each thrust. The young lovers continued like this for a time unknown to them, forcing their mouths together in a messy but incredibly heated contact as they moved in unison. Finally Allen tensed, clenching around Kanda before throwing her head back, her hair whipping through the air as she screamed. Kanda reached his climax shortly afterwards, muffling his own cry by sinking his teeth into the skin near Allen's collarbone as he came, his hips coming to a shuddering stop against those of his fiancée.

Exhausted, he collapsed backwards, Allen falling forwards to lie on top of him. She was breathing heavily, her hot breath making Kanda's skin tingle where it hit.

"Are you alright?" Kanda asked in a moment of uncharacteristic concern, and Allen smiled softly against his chest.

"I'm fine." She mumbled in reply, whimpering softly as she felt Kanda still inside her when she shifted. "Luckiest woman alive…"

"So fucking cheesy." Kanda muttered, and Allen poked him.

"Mr. Pessimist." she retorted.

"Che."

"Kanda…?"

"Che."

"Y'know, I'm actually… I'm actually a bit afraid. When Miranda had her baby, it looked really, really painful… but you'll be there, won't you? You'll be there to tell me to shut up. You'll be there to tell me to stop complaining and just get the hell on with it."

Kanda blinked, unnerved by how accurate Allen's prediction was. "You're an idiot for thinking you won't be fine."

"So I've been told, BaKanda."

"Fucking wisecrack."

"Such language will be not used in front of our child." Allen stated, completely serious.

Really? "Whatever, moyashi."

Kanda wrapped his arm around Allen, stroking her lower back and enjoying the feel of her body pressed against his so closely. Her heartbeat was beginning to return to its normal pace, having being accelerated by her intense orgasm.

They were both afraid, really, but at the same time they were both greatly anticipating the life ahead of them; Kanda knew as much. They were young… of course the thought of family and marriage seemed a bit daunting.

Kanda also knew that his family wouldn't believe him when he said that a. he was going to get married and that b. he was having a baby with Allen Walker. That just wasn't what Kanda Yuu would do.

But they were wrong. It was what the Kanda Yuu with Allen Walker would do. The one before that was irrelevant; he didn't fit in with this new story.

One day, Kanda thought to himself as Allen began to doze off on top of him, In one day I got myself a fiancée, gained a status as a father-to-be and finally fucked some sense into this crazy woman.

But she's the only crazy woman I'd ever be with, so that's alright.

Tiedoll will never shut up to me about this.

And this is going to be one hell of a good looking kid.


Somewhere far, far away, the ringing of a mobile phone signalled the arrival of a certain text.

And somewhere far, far away, Cross Marian spat out his wine and swore to lynch a certain Japanese and a certain idiot 'apprentice'.

They were so getting condoms for Christmas.


Last line: WTF, even to me.

Have to say, that was quite fun to write, but normal Allen is still boss to me.

This was also difficult to get typed, too… making Kanda do things such as accept upcoming parenthood and proposing without making him get too mushy were also quite big challenges.

Kanda's last thought was one I had myself, actually. LOL. But it's true. Allen and Kanda. Come on! And of course Kanda would be an arrogant bastard about it. XD

Review if you like. Hope you enjoyed; I need to finish the THIRD VERSION of a chapter for my multi-chapter fic… aheh… why the heck do writer's block, exams and stupid illnesses love me so much?

Happy Fanfic reading and writing, everyone!

~Zaskaea