DISCLAIMER: I do not own Gakuen Alice and the characters used. They belong to the wonderful and the only one Higuchi Tachibana. ;)
A Fairytale Gone Wrong
Written by LunarChan
(A Gakuen Alice One Shot – Kokoro Yome and Sumire Shouda)
Ironically, people always have to make a joke when they actually mean what they say…
And they like to sound serious when they only want to play.
I groaned. I can't find a novel which is good enough to be my topic at the special assignment that Narumi-sensei gave me.
It was that guy's fault! I angrily thought as I circled around the Alice Library, picking some novels, and putting it back in its shelf. This novel is too hard to be a topic! GAH! Just looking at its words makes me feel dizzy.
My brow furrowed in frustration as I went around – again, for the fourth time – around the shelves. 'Because of that freaking freaking Natsume…!' I cursed.
'How can I find an easy novel? Or just an English short story?' I grunted.
Then, as if on cue, a book suddenly fell from the top shelf, banging my poor head, and then landing on the floor.
"Owwiiieeee." I winced and picked up the green book that fell. "Bedtime Stories presents The Ugly Princess and the Handsome Poor Boy...?"
I haven't heard this story. My brows were arched as I went back to the library table where my things are. I sat ever so carefully on the wooden chair, my eyes not taking off of the book.
'That was a mouthful title.' I shrugged. But it seems like a fairytale. And I love fairytales! This can be my topic! Narumi-sensei didn't gave me any genre to focus on, anyway.
My hands touched the hardbound cover. It was thick, like there was something underneath the fancy cover. I tried to look at the side, but I didn't see anything. Shrugging again, my eyes traced everything on the book cover.
The title was written in a fancy calligraphy and in bold letters.
The Ugly Princess and The Handsome Poor Boy
Below the title was the image of the ugly princess inside the balcony of a castle. Her hair was green-colored and and is curly at the ends. She has thick brows that look very odd and her face was full of freckles. She has thick lips. Very ugly, indeed. She was wearing a green gown and she was looking up at the sky. It was like she's waiting for some miracle. Like wishing on a star…
On the far side of the castle was a handsome boy sitting on the floor with his flute. His hair was yellow-caramel-colored and he looks cheery and bright. He was wearing ragged and old clothes. But you can see on the looks of his face that he's happy and contented. He's handsome, indeed. His chin balances his face. And his eyes were so bright.
My forehead creased again. They look like some people I knew… I almost giggled.
I opened the book and found very thick pages. Why is this book always thick?
I leaned back on my chair and started reading mentally. This might be a good story!
On a nearby land, there was an enormous castle and there lived an evil Queen named Luna. She was the worst mother anyone could ever have. She doesn't want her daughter to go outside. She locks her daughter inside her room in the tower.
Oh yeah. You asking about the king? He died. Well, he didn't die from disease like most of you were thinking! He died because the Queen killed her! Hah. AS I've said, EVIL QUEEN. And the reason why the Queen killed the King? Nothing. She just shrugged.
But her record was clean. The Queen made someone say that the King committed suicide. But her daughter knew everything. She knew why the Queen locked her up. She knew why her father – the Good Ol' King – died. But then again, maybe not.
I paused reading for a while. This is funny. I laughed. And I had to remind myself to calm down and not laugh too loud.
But seriously, is this a fairytale?
I flipped again the cover. It said, Bedtime Stories… So this was supposed to be a fairytale.
I looked down, on the cover and the front page, trying to find the author. I wonder who wrote this.
There was no name! Not even a signature or some sort of initials!
That made me more curious about this story so I opened it again, back to the page I was reading…
That's one of the two adjectives that you can describe the Evil Queen's daughter.
Seriously, locked up for your whole life in the tower? Wouldn't that make you crazy?
Good thing she wasn't. But maybe close to insanity, anyway.
The princess stared at the ceiling for a long time. She wanted to get out. But how? She don't know how to. She'd think of a strategy the whole day, and she would try it out, the whole night…
Wonder how she sleeps? She's a vampire. That explains it. No.
I'm just kidding about the VAMPIRE PART thing. Ha ha. (Note my forced laugh.)
…And every night, the result will always be the same. Fail.
Mae it two words: Epic Fail.
Another two adjectives for the princess. Hey, you're learning a lot from me, huh? That's good! Anyway, back to the story…
She got tired of staring at the ceiling and she got up from her bed. She walked slowly – yes, very very very slow – to the mirror. To the big mirror in her enormous room in the gigantic castle. Whew.
She stared at her own reflection for the whole five minutes. Her green-permed short hair… Her thick brows that meet together at the center – which made her look like a witch… Her thick, swollen lips – swollen because she's always dreaming of her prince, and she's kissing her pillow every night, practicing how to kiss!... Her not-so-good, braced teeth… Her freckles that turned out to be her face – note the sarcasm there.
Another two adjective words for you, people: Ugly Princess.
Also known as Sumire Shouda.
That did it! I burst out laughing.
Who did this?
I know, I'm not that dim-witted. It has to be one of our classmates.
If Sumire sees this, she'll kill that mystery writer.
I heard the librarian silenced me. "Sssssshhhhh"
I bit my lip, and my mouth was twitching. Fighting a smile.
Sumire got tired of the storyteller because the storyteller made her more ugly – but hey, that's my job!
Sumire sighed and turned her back at the big mirror in the enormous room in the gigantic castle on the nearby land and sat at the edge of her bed.
When will my prince come to rescue me? When? When? Her thoughts were like screaming at the whole land.
The farmers nearby stopped plowing when they heard Sumire's pleading thoughts. "Whose ugly voice is that?" They shouted and ran for their lives. "A bad omen! A bad omen!"
Okay, they are exaggerating. Never mind them. Hey, that's another two words: Ugly voice.
"Mealtime, Princess!" The door was opened by a pink-haired servant at the castle. Anna Umenomiya.
The Ugly Princess A.K.A. Sumire Shouda looked at her with insecurity in her eyes. Anna is pretty. Not to mention – but I did – a good cook, too! Her pink wavy hair hung past her shoulders and it shimmered against the chandelier light.
Due to insecurity, Sumire looked at her hair. Dry. Dull. Green. Ugly. She grimaced at the tone the storyteller used.
"Here's your breakfast, princess." Anna smiled as she put down the food at the table.
Sumire got up and sat on the specially made wooden chair for the Ugly Princess.
"Anna." Sumire stated, looking down at her food.
"What is it, princess?" Anna smiled.
"I need you to help me."
"Of course, anything for the princess!" Was Anna's reply.
"Switch places with me for a while."
"Huh?" Anna's eyes widened.
Sumire ran to her closet and she gestured for Anna to come look.
It was like there's another room inside her closet. It's too wide and spacious. You get my point.
There was dresses and wigs and shoes and all sorts of things for a girl to need. Sumire took a pink wavy hair that matched Anna's hair. She took another wig that matched her hair – but the green wig was more shiny than her hair, jot that down.
"Here." Sumire handed Anna the green wig.
Anna took it but was still dumbfounded.
"So you be the princess while I'm gone." Sumire explained and rolled her pathetic eyes. "I'm going to be the cook and go out."
"B-But… The Queen…" Anna mouthed, too scared of the Evil Mindless Queen.
The Ugly Princess rolled her pathetic eyes again. "She won't know if you won't tell her."
In the end, the ugly princess blackmailed Anna and Anna agreed.
If you're wondering how Anna looked? Okay. I'll describe her to you… She wore the ugly princess' green gown and wore the green wig. It was perfect. Except that her face was still pretty. So what did they do?
Yeah. You know how Halloween is very popular? They had those mask. And since the princess was very ugly, they would make fun of her and would put her face in the Halloween masks. The Ugly Princess didn't know that her Mother was the person behind all of those.
And, of course, the Evil Queen laughed 'til she rolled on the floor when the masks became popular.
So the Ugly Princess put on a red hood, and slowly walked outside her room. And then, sprinted away. But, hey. She was lost in the gigantic castle since she wasn't allowed to leave her room, right? In the end, she followed the fishy smell and she landed on the kitchen.
"Oh, hey Anna." The other cook was stirring the pot and his back was turned to Sumire. Sumire also turned her back, in case the cook turns around. "Buy potatoes."
"O-Okay." Sumire's ugly voice echoed around the kitchen. The idiotic cook didn't even realize the change of voice. "A-Anyway, where is the exit?"
The cook laughed. "How can you not know?" But he pointed.
Sumire ran towards the door, outside the back gates… Ad ran and ran to her heart's content…
"FREE!" She shouted and tossed the red coat upward. You know, like in the movies?
The people around her automatically turned away.
Oh my God. The Ugly Princess' thoughts were alarmed. They'd know I'm the princess and they would tell my mother!
Then, to her astonishment, everyone burst out laughing.
She caught her red coat and hid herself.
"Hey you!" A guy with sandy hair shouted and Sumire's head automatically jerked up. "Do not wear that Ugly Princess Mask on regular day! It's not Halloween!"
And they laughed again. She heaved a deep sigh of relief.
That was rude. But at least, she got off the hook.
And so, she wandered and wandered around and around… Her feet ugly just kept walking and walking and walking…
'Til she heard something that made herstop and turn around.
A melody of a flute. Her ears perked up and followed the sound. She saw a yellow-caramel-haired handsome, gorgeous guy who's playing the flute. She was so awed that her feet brought her in front of him. And that made him stop playing the flute and look up.
He almost died of a heart attack. "Yo, don't scare me like that, missy." And he laughed nervously.
Seriously, who would just pop out of thin air and would appear in front of you that looked like the Ugly Princess that's been locked all her life inside the enormous room in the gigantic castle because the Oh-so-beautiful Queen would like to lock up her bad luck? The handsome guy thought. Well, this girl would.
The Ugly Princess looked at him with eyes full of love. Yeah. The one with the hearts. I want this guy to be my prince. That was what the idiot Ugly Princess thought.
The Ugly Princess was mad at my use of art in language, people. Well, she was idiot. Why? She want that handsome guy to be her prince. Was she blind? He can't be her prince!
And why not? The Ugly Princess hissed at the storyteller.
Well, look at him! His messy hair… His ragged and old clothes… His scratched and looked-like-a-century-old flute…
Oh. The Ugly Princess blinked.
See? I'm right.
I don't care. I fell in love with him. The Ugly Princess stuck her tongue out at the storyteller.
Oh for the love of all that's holy! She fell love at first hear! What? First hear?
"Pffft…" I bit my lip again. Hilarious!
Shouldn't it be love at first sight? And what's with the wrong grammar? Love at first hear?
That's really something.
I know what you're thinking. Well, she was attracted to her music. So, it's love at first hear.
Never mind the grammar. The Ugly Princess is idiot, anyway. Note another sarcasm there.
The Ugly Princess was so fascinated and stunned with the handsome gorgeous guy sitting in the street on the far side of the gigantic castle.
And so, he brought her home. He thought, this girl was interesting, still not taking her mask off. He wanted to see the face behind that mask. He knew she's beautiful.
And folks, as you see, the handsome guy was wrong.
I didn't introduce him yet.
The yellow-caramel-colored haired guy… the handsome face that sparkles when sunrays hit him – no, delete that. He wasn't a vampire. Ok. His handsome face that would make all the girls go crazy… His mesmerizing eyes that sucks you up like a black hole – and believe me, The Ugly Princess was sucked in it… His slender and built body frame…
He is the Handsome Poor Boy as you have seen on the title of this book.
Also known as Kokoro Yome.
"WTF? !" I wanted to shout but it came out as a whisper. But my laugh echoed around the library and the librarian silenced me again.
I suddenly forgot my literature assignment and all I wanted was to finish this book and find out who wrote this.
He let her inside his little house. The fire crackled and lit up the whole house. The little couch was placed in front of the fireplace. There was also a small table and there was some leftover food there.
There was a curtain that separates all of these from his own room.
They did the most perverted – I mean the most forbidden thing that not everyone can do, to only those who said "I do" on the altar, they're the only ones that can do it.
Yes. They made love.
When Koko found out that she was the real ugly princess, after they did it, you know… Because Sumire fell asleep and he tried to get off the mask, which turned out to be her real face.
He got up too quickly on his bed and vomited on the kitchen sink.
He can't believe he did it with the Ugly Princess.
He would be doomed. Forever. Maybe the Queen would behead him in front of everyone saying that she raped the Ugly Princess! Ew. Who would even dare?
Or maybe the Queen would poison him! Or make him marry the Ugly Princess!
Shit! Koko's thoughts were alarmed. I have to hide!
And he hid. Under the bed.
After she woke up, shes trying to find her prince, but she can't find her.
Well, you can't blame her. She's so stupid that she didn't even think of looking under the bed!
So she left. Crying. She went back to the castle.
After two months…
Can I have some drum roll effects? Thanks.
The result of their – you know! – yeah. The result of that was seen, now. Oh, it's not that her belly is big enough already. Don't even think about that. It makes Koko wanna puke and he'll punch me.
The signs that the Ugly Princess is pregnant was already showing… She's throwing up every morning. Always crying. Craving for uncravable foods, even at the midnight hour!
And when the Evil Oh-So-Beautiful Queen (the Queen paid me a billion bucks just to describe her like this) knew about it. She got angry. Really angry. REALLY REALLY ANGRY! Because the father of the child inside The Ugly Princess' womb was a poor handsome guy! The Oh-So-Beautiful Queen prefers a handsome prince!
But she thought of another plan…
If the Ugly Princess were to marry him, she would be thrown out of the castle… And they will live poorly ever after!
The Oh-So-Beautiful Evil Queen laughed his Oh-So-Beautiful Evil laugh.
And she made an order to look for Kokoro Yome!
And unfortunately, one of the castle guards hunting him was wise enough to look under the bed, and found him. So he was forced to buy a ring.
And was forced to go inside the gigantic castle, into the enormous room.
Sumire heard of the Evil Queen's plans. She was bothered. She wanted to marry Koko, but she just can't leave the throne to that Evil Queen!
She has to decide…
Koko was just staring at her and she was also staring at him. 'Kay fine. Do a staring contest.
Unfortunately, The Ugly Princess won.
Koko walked slowly towards her. The small box which held the ring that was inside the back pocket of his pants suddenly weighed like ten pounds. And he was very uncomfortable. He wanted to end this. But not his life.
He wanted a happy life. Not a doomed life forever with the Ugly Princess. Seemed like her bad luck affected him already.
Finally. When Koko reached the Ugly Princess, he kneeled.
"W-Will you…" The words came out of Koko's mouth were like choked. Like a lie. Like forced. Well, he really was forced, anyway. "Will you… Marry me?"
The Ugly Princess weighed her options again. If she said yes, the whole city will suffer all her Evil Mother's wrongdoings… And if she said no, she'll be a hero.
Hell NO! That's what she thinks, anyway. What she thinks doesn't matter, anyway! She's an idiot Ugly Princess, right?
The Ugly Princess sucked in a deep breath before answering, "NO."
And Koko lived happily ever after.
WHAT THE EFFING HELL? !" I laughed out loud. And the librarian was tired to silence me that she walked straight to me and glowered at me. I suppressed my laugh. "S-Sorry…"
I looked back at the book again and there was some note after the The end words.
The Ugly Princess can't take her sadness that she ran out of her room… Ran… Just running. Exercise! LOL.
"Sheesh. I shouldn't have brought that damn ring." Koko pocketed the ring again, thinking of selling it to a jeweler.
He stood up straight and whistled as he went out.
Okay. This is really it.
I suppressed my laugh. Who made this?
Then, there was small letters on the last page. It was written in a fancy calligraphy, too. Like on the front cover. But it was small and hardly noticeable.
It was in bold and was italicized.
Dang! I knew it. Koko made this.
"There it is!" I suddenly heard a familiar voice and I turned around. It was Kitsu. Mochu was running beside him.
"Shhhhh." I heard the librarian again.
They walked slowly until they reached me.
"What's up?" I asked them.
"The book." Kitsu's hands were open. He wanted me to hand him the book.
"No." I frowned. "I have to do a literature assignment. And this is the book I picked."
"It fell down when I was reading it on the air and I fell asleep on the top of the shelf." I see. So Kitsu was on top of the shelf and it fell down.
"Sumire's gonna be pissed if she sees this." Mochu laughed.
"Yeah, I bet." I giggled.
Suddenly, the door opened. Revealing a panting and angry Sumire.
"You two!" She shouted and ran after them. When she noticed the book in my hands, she snatched it.
I was left there, laughing.
This was one of the best day ever.
I forgot! I wasn't finished with my assignment!
I groaned as I stood up and circled the library again.
to make matters worse, the librarian was so pissed at us that she made us all go out!
Oh, yeah. Talk about bad luck.
Heyyo all! This was just random. XD
Was it hilarious?
I hope so. XD
Thank you for reading and don't forget to leave a review, huh!
Those reviews keep me going. ;)
I CAN TAKE CREDIT. DISCLAIMER: The idea about "the boy lived happily ever after" thing wasn't really mine.
It was passed on to me by my friend on a text message and the idea clicked! XD Yeah!
It goes like this:
Once upon a time, there was an ugly princess...
She got pregnant by a handsome guy...
Boy: WILL YOU MARRY ME?
UGLY PRINCESS: NO.
...And the boy lived happily ever after!
Dang! I was so laughing hard! And I think it would fit Koko's personality well, so I made it like this!
Oh and you wanna read more G.A. fics?
Go to my profile, then. ;)
Hihi~! Thank you!
HUGS AND KISSES FOR EVERYONE~!
~ LunarChan (6-26-11)