Nothing. Not a word…

Gilbert grabbed her arms and stared into her face, "why do they work here?"

"Because the group was running out of money and one of the men didn't die in the fire that I told Lovina about. He told them about me when I was in my second term and they took up the posts eagerly."

"Because they knew you would listen…"

"I didn't have a choice and since then… They haven't been rough or anything and they work the gardens and everything…"

Gilbert checked his guns and shook his head. "Liebling… I hope you know we're moving out of this damn house when this is over. I'm not taking them with us either. Their payments are being dropped completely."


He captured her lips again and silenced her. "I want to know your hobbies too."


He sighed and looked around for eavesdroppers, "I need to know your likes and dislikes."

"I hate all marine animals and food… I like cake, music, and gardening , I guess… why?"

He smiled brightly at her, "just wondering. Geez, you're such a girl. Giving in so easily. No wonder the idiots work here."

Viveka punched him square in the jaw and sauntered out of the room. "JACKASS!"



He snickered and headed up to Ludwig's room. It was time for a reality check.



Ludwig sat up and made sure to have Feliciano covered from Gilbert's occasional averting gaze. "We can't do anything about it right now… Geez, that explains how she knew how to cover things up so well… The mafia… of all the shit to have come up during an investigation…"

"I know right? This just made the whole thing so much more awesome!"

"Gilbert…nein." His brother moved a hand through his hair in frustration and looked over at Feliciano. "I think I might retire after this job."


"I have enough myself and I would rather stay behind my desk than be running after specters in the dark with you and the other two… and that damn Russian."

"Pfft, you love us…well… maybe not Francis and Ivan, but me and Tonio, you love."

"Gilbert, focus."

"I am focused. In case you haven't noticed, I'm the one with all the information."

"Do you think this has any relevance to the case?"


"Then what does it matter?"

"What does it… COME ON! Those assholes are using her fear for their own personal gain!"

"People do that everyday."

"Ja, but they aren't allowed to…well…um…"

"They aren't allowed to do that to Viveka because she's important to you." Ludwig laid back down and sighed, "technically they don't actually exist. I checked their names in the Vienna records. None of them even exist. Technically you could shoot them all dead and no one would even notice. They live at those posts at the front and back of the property anyway. I have a sneaking suspicion that Viveka gives them their food and everything."

Gilbert stared at him blankly. "…really?"


He clicked off his gun's safety and grinned, "I'll be right back then… um. Can you call Ivan? He's got a big clean up job coming up in about five minutes."

"BRUDER! NEIN! Leave them be. We need to figure out who is trying to kill us."

Gilbert sighed and walked out of the room, "fine…nacht West."

"Schlaf gute."

Gilbert shut the door and glanced at the master bedroom doors. Technically… well…

He snuck downstairs and picked Francis's cell phone up. "Hello?"

"Hey Ivan… so, that private cleaning job you were telling Francis about the other month… I think I would like to hire you…"


"Yep, I've got a bit of a job for you. I can give you the address if you want now… Can you be here in about five minutes?"

"Da, tell me the house and I can even help you kill them."

"No need, this is a bit personal."

"Would you like me to bring my lead pipe so you can smash their heads in?"

"No. I'm good. Just get your ass to this address," he quickly riddled out the address and hung up. Pulling out his other gun, he left the house and wandered out into the yard. He snuck past the bushes and paused at beside the door to the first post area by the front of the house.


"It's not real you nimrod! It's rigged!"

"SO? Who the hell cares?"

Gilbert peaked into the window at the three men staring at the television. One sitting at a desk was carving a piece of wood thoughtfully. "Guys… don't you think this whole guarding business is getting a bit dull? I mean we're actually working now."

"Si, it's so boring. We should quit and go back to Rome."

"No, no, we just need to remind a little someone how close to death she's walking."

The television junkie snickered as the idiot on the couch frowned, "but boss. She's got company."

"And they've probably got money too. Think about it boys. Would you like a raise?"

They snickered and Gilbert froze as he found his third gun taken from his pants. He looked over his shoulder and stared in shock as Viveka started to check the ammo. "Specs? Shouldn't you be in bed?"

"Ja, but you aren't either and they're pissing me off."

"Yeah…" He really didn't know what to think at this point.

"I figure if you're going to kill them, since you called in a cleaner you are, that I might as well get some revenge." She clicked the safety off and glared angrily, "it's about time I did something about the filth around here."

"Specs, we've got to talk about getting you a whip… or at least a tight leather outfit."

Viveka glared at him and kicked the door. Unfortunately, she really didn't take into account that kicking down a door was not as simple as being mad and giving the door a pathetic nudge (aka her best effort of a kick). The door remained in one piece and Gilbert shook his head, "stand aside and watch the professional, Viv."

He busted down that damn door and shot at the trio. They stared at them in shock and dropped like flies before they could reach the communications to the back area security.

"Isn't there supposed to be a countdown of some sort before you start shooting?"

"Nein, now give me back my gun. Geez, you seem to keep grabbing the same one too."

"Probably because I always know where that one is."

"Probably because you should stop grabbing it!" Gilbert pulled her away from the mess and back outside, "go back to the house and get back to bed."

"…NEIN! You're killing people on my property. I want in."

"This is not some little piece of revenge. When you shoot someone, you don't just forget, Viv. Go back inside."

"Gilbert. No. I'm coming with you and shooting at the last post."


"I'm not going to inside so you might as well accept it." She headed around the house and Gilbert cursed softly as he followed. Damn, sexy, unreasonable… He frowned and reached back behind himself for his third gun and glared, hissing at her, "YOU STOLE MY GUN!"

"Borrowed. I borrowed your gun. You can have it back when I'm done."

Gilbert picked her pretty little ass up and hauled her up the back steps into the house. He shoved her through the entry, taking back his gun, and shoving a rake through the door handles so she couldn't get back out.




Gilbert smirked mischievously as he walked down to the post and knocked on the door. The guards opened the door and frowned, "what's going on?"

"Revenge is calling." Gilbert shot the man and used his body as a shield as he shot the other six in the room down. Well… That was that then…

A buzzing came and Gilbert walked into the building to find a camera on the gate. Ivan was waiting. He sprinted around the house and opened the gate for the Russian.

"Hello Gilbert. It is quite nice out is it?"

"Ja, ja. Let's hurry this shit up."

Ivan nodded and looked over at the front door and the cars parked, "everyone else is here. Is something going on?"

"No. Everyone is working. Can we focus?"

Ivan nodded and they went back to the back post. "Okay, I've got eight here and another three at the other building."

"What did they do?"


Ivan frowned, "I charge a lot per body, Gilbert…"

"Whatever, I'll pay ya after we get these guys the heck out of here."

Ivan stacked a couple bodies on top of each other and started to carry them out to his van. "I do love playing with you guys. You always have such fun hobbies."

Gilbert shivered at the look of delight on the man's face and dragged a body along too. It took several minutes before they had all the bodies in the van. Gilbert sighed as Ivan started to go on about how to kill people without touching them, "it's a hard thing to do if you are not very smart. You have to be patient."

"Ivan… we're done."

"Da? That is too bad. We will have to do this again sometime."

"Yeah, yeah, it was a joy. How much?"

"Two grand."


Ivan chuckled. "I will accept checks."

Gilbert stared at him and felt something press up against his back, "so do I make this out to you or what?"


"There is more than one door. Now then, Ivan, is it?"

"Da, hello there. It is two grand and you make it out to Ivan Braginski."

"Ah, Alfred told me about you."

Ivan grinned even more, "little Amerikan. I love him, he has so much energy."

"He almost has too much." She handed Ivan the check and Ivan tucked it into his van.

"Da, he does. What are you doing here anyway?"

"I live here."

"And you killed your guards?"

"Bad people. You can't trust too many people these days."

"…okay. You both are so much fun. Dasvidanya." He got into his car and started to drive off and Gilbert rounded on her.

"What are you doing?"

"I was being gracious to your worker. You don't have the money to pay him."

"Two grand is double what our last guy got paid for one body!"

"He clearly retired for a reason."

"I don't trust you!"

She stared at him in outrage, "why? Because I happen to have a few questionable~"


"It was~"

Gilbert dragged her ass up to the house and knocked her out. "We have to have a real talk."

Gilbert flicked the light on and sat down across from the tied up Austrian. Damn, any other time and he would have been loving this.

"Hello Gilbert."

"Where were you born?"

"Vienna, Austria." The lie detector moved in agreement and Gilbert sighed. Okay, that was working.

"Have you met the mafia?"

"Ja." He looked at the machine and sighed in relief. Ludwig sat down to his left and rubbed his eyes out of exhaustion.

"Did the mafia kill your parents?"


"Did you make a deal with them?"


"Did you ever do anything illegal with the mafia?"

"Nein, I hate them."

"Did you leave your position as governor due to the mafia?"


Gilbert looked over at Ludwig and sighed, "have you ever killed someone?"


The machine remained normal and Gilbert sighed in relief. Ludwig didn't make any show of emotion, "have you done anything illegal?"

"I allowed myself to be bribed by the mafia, but other than that nein."

Gilbert reclined back in his chair and grinned. "So you have never plotted a murder, tried to get us killed, funded any organization that was killing people, or anything like that?"


Ludwig sighed, "this was a complete waste of time." He started to turn off the machine and Gilbert stopped him.

"Hold on." He grinned and sat across from Viveka again. "Do you love your fiancé?"


"Do you love me, Viveka?"

Ludwig sighed, "Bruder~"

"Nein, I wanna know." Gilbert stared at her questioningly.

She rolled her eyes. "Nein." The machine went off in a fit and Ludwig sighed.

"She's lying. We know the machine is working, I'm going to bed. Nacht." He walked out and Viveka glared at him.

"Do you mind untying me now?"

"Nope, I have more questions."

"When do you get in this chair?"

"Never. Now then, what would you say is my greatest quality?" She raised an eyebrow at him and he grinned happily, "we can sit here all night liebling."

"…you tenacity."

"Nice, I was looking for my five meters or my awesomeness, but that's good too… I guess. Anyway, next question. Why did you agree to marry me?"


"That's not an answer."

"That's all you're going to get."

"Okay then. You mind if I sleep in your room while I wait for an answer? I'm kind of tired."

She stared at him in shock as he headed out of the room, "WAIT! …I married you because I love you."

The machine remained calm and Gilbert smirked. "Awesome."

"But I also think you are the most obnoxious, pigheaded, moronic, frustrating man that I have ever had the displeasure of meeting!"

Gilbert shrugged, "but you love me."

"I must be insane…"

That was acceptable. "Alright then, do you flirt?"

"From time to time."

"With other guys besides me?"

"I have in the past."

"Did you flirt with Peter and Ivan?"

"Who's Peter?"

"That guy from my work building that complimented you the other day and you joked that you had a moment with him."

"Huh… so that was Peter."

"Answer the question."

"I have flirted before."

"With Peter and Ivan?"

"With people in general."

"But you flirted with Peter and Ivan?"

"Gilbert, untie me this instant!"

"Answer my question."

"I have flirted before."


"Not seriously…"


"Ja… it was for your reactions only."

"YOU LITTLE TEASE! I KNEW IT! And you flirted with Alfred too!"

"Nein, that was not flirting."

"Oh… Anyway, have you ever wanted to be a stripper?"


"Answer the quest~"


"Is that a no to my asking you to answer or a no to the strip~"

"I have never wanted to be a stripper!"

Damn, there went that fantasy… "Have you ever wanted to be extra unaristocratic for me?"



"What do you mean by unaristocratic?" Gilbert stared at her in shock, Ho-ly- crap. Gilbert was half sure that he had just pissed himself.

"I mean something that you would normally not consider."

"…maybe a couple times…"

AND WE HAVE TAKE OFF! "So… Does it have to do with the maid outfit?"

Viveka gave him a look and shifted in her seat, "Gilbert I'm tired and this twenty questions is getting on my nerves."

"Answer the question."

"…fine. I might have looked at a purchase of a maid outfit. There, can I go to bed now?"

"Nein! I have more questions!"

"I don't know why you can't trust me to just answer honestly."

"I like this. It gives you pressure."

"I'm going to show you pressure…"

"Oh, Specs… anyway, next question. Would you do anything for me?"



"I would not make love to Francis for you."

Gilbert wrinkled his nose a bit. "Okay, bad question…"

"You asked it."

"Ja… ew, I hope you know I want to kill Francis even more now. Why would you immediately think of him?"

"Because I was thinking that you are being worse than he usually is right now."

"Ouch, I probably deserve that. Okay, moving along, would you do dirty things with me?"


"Come on, Viv."

"Ja… I suppose."

WOOT~ AWESOME! "Okay, would you ever cheat on me?"

"Nein, I believe in faithfulness and loyalty."

AWESOME! GO GILBERT GO! "Alright, hmm… would you do lap dances for me?"


"Viveka, how many times am I going to have to ask you to answer the question?"

"That depends on how many absurd questions you are going to have me answer! Get me out of this chair!"

"Would you though?"

"If the situation called for it I suppose…"

Gilbert smiled brightly and untied the Austrian to receive a swift kick to the balls. He doubled over in pain and Viveka quickly strapped him down to the chair and tied him up. She tightened the straps a bit much and attached the probes to him.

"My turn."


"You got to ask me all sort of inappropriate things. I think it's only proper if I can ask you things… maybe I should have someone check to make sure I attached these right~"

"They're right!"

"Nein, nein… Hold on." She left the room and Gilbert cursed incessantly until she returned with Francis. NEIN! She could have gotten West or Tonio, but NEIN! She gets the biggest mouth of the whole group! DAMN!

"Bon soir!"

"Are these on right, Francis?"

"Hmm?" Francis checked the attachments and smirked, "ask him a very personal question mon fleur. We'll find out."

Viveka sat down primly across from him and tapped her foot as she thought. "Well, we should start with something simple, what's your name?"

"Gilbert Beilschmidt."

"Okay… and this means he's telling the truth Francis?" Francis grinned and nodded. "Okay, well then, Gilbert? Do you really love me?"



"Why not?"

Francis leaned over and pointed to a button, "mon fleur, this is a special lie detector. It actually has a button that can send a harmless but annoying volt of electricity through a person."



Gilbert went pale, "ALRIGHT! I love you because you pay attention and you are beautiful and intelligent and you make me feel something that I've never felt before and it's annoying to admit it."

Viveka smiled and blushed a bit as Francis started to laugh his head off. "That's so sweet…"

"Viv… we are going to have some serious one on one time later."

"What would you say you like best about me?"

"Mein Gott… " Gilbert glared at Francis, "can you leave Francis? She knows how to work the verdammt machine."

"Mon ami, I would not miss this if you paid me all the money of the world."

"Answer the question Gilbert."

"I like your personality." True.

Viveka started to move forward to kiss him and Francis held her back, "what about mon fleur's personality?"

"All of it." The machine went off and Gilbert quickly amended himself, "except of course her need to strap me to this machine… and not listen to me."

Francis nodded and the machine calmed down. "Mon ami, what would you do if she ever left you?"

"I would drink and do my job." The machine buzzed again and Gilbert rolled his eyes, "I would probably not actually work."

Viveka raised a dainty eye at Francis and he nodded, "you should know he took his last relationship badly."

"I remember hearing something about that. What happened in that relationship?"

"I was too awesome for Matthew and left him." LIES! The machine went haywire and Viveka sighed.

"We can sit here all night…"

"He left me because I was… too self-centered…"

"Aw, poor~"

"Non, non, mon fleur. Let him continue."

"I actually think I'm~"

"Mon ami, would you do anything to keep Viveka with you?"


"Frnacis, I think we're done~"

Francis grinned even more, "you would kill?"





Francis ignored her and stood in front of Gilbert in excitement, "what would you~"

"FRANCIS STOP!" Viveka smacked the Frenchman and started to untie Gilbert. "Goodness, he answered enough."

Gilbert grabbed the Austrian and held her close, glaring at Francis in complete outrage. "Gott… Come on Specs…"

"Mon fleur, we still had some questions~"

'Nein, we do not."

Francis sighed and headed out of the room, "too bad, and we were having so much fun…"

"Smug bastard."

Viveka kissed his cheek and smiled a bit, "you shouldn't have tied me up then."

"Oh no. Don't you be throwing that at me. You and I both know that you have some shady shit in your past. You can't blame me for not~"

"You should be able to trust me Gilbert! There was no reason~"

Gilbert kissed her enthusiastically and nodded, "I trust you… I just had a moment of doubt. It's nothing seriou~"

"It's very serious!"

"Okay, so it's a little serious. Relax. I'll make sure to make it up to you. Like oh, I don't know… admit my feelings in front of Francis of all people."

"It was sweet."

"It was annoying and we are never doing that again. In fact, I think that calls for a lap dance in a maid outfit."


"No? I do believe you need to return my awesome will to fight… just about an hour of lap dancing and maybe something else a little dirty looking."


"Come on! I know just the thing!"


Gilbert tossed her over her shoulder and rushed up the stairs. He tossed her onto the bed and ran into the walk-in closet. He came back out with a box and grinned evilly. "This… is most definitely the thing you want."

"Nein…I'm pretty sure it's not."

"Ja, you do."

"Come on."


"Come on!"



"That's not inspiring me to wear that~"

"It's not a maid outfit."

She paused, "well…"

"Come on. I'll even help you into it."

"And out."

"Oh hell, yeah."

"Nein. I'm not wearing that."

"You haven't even seen it!"

"I don't need to."

Gilbert tossed the lid away and picked her legs up. He slowly slid her stockings and underwear off before moving her into a sitting position. "Oh, this will probably be your favorite thing of all time to wear. You'll love it; that I can promise you."

"Gilbert!" Viveka gasped a bit as Gilbert slid her dress off and unhooked her bra. "Stop!"

"Nein, not yet. I get to enjoy this."

She glared at him a bit and he pulled the outfit out. "WHAT IS THAT?"

"This is awesome. I have planned this perfectly. You see this? It's gorgeous. Look. There's this nice attachment"

"It's a two piece with a belt!"

"I know right? Talk about reading minds."

Viveka headed to the edge of the bed and he grabbed her ankles, sliding her back over. "GILBERT!"

"Nein, I'm not taking no for an answer." He slid the bottom up and lapped at her breasts a bit, "awesome."

"Gilbert, this is completely inappropriate!"

He strapped the bra around her and belted her up. Pulling her up and grinning, "this is right. You know it. I know it. You know what?"


"This," he put something into her hands, "this is yours. No more stealing my gun. Well… maybe now and then, but I have to give it to you."

Viveka looked down at the crop and raised a brow, "really?"

"This is perfect! I think this is going to be awesome. Do you know how to belly dance?"

"Do I know what?"

Gilbert grinned and picked her up, "this!" He moved her hips and nearly lost his mind at the feel of her hips grinding slowly against his crotch.


"Oh this needs to continue. You cannot NOT give up on this!"

She blushed deeply and looked away.

"Oh no, none of that." He turned her head a bit, "do you feel how awesome this is? You know what we should do?"


He slid his shirt off and grinned, "I bet you could belly dance without me helping you."


"Come on," he leaned in and grinned, "I'll personally embarrass myself any time you want me to."


"Come on, just a little lap dance? Nothing serious."


Gilbert wrapped himself closer to her and reached under her top, "you know~ I really would love to see you dance for me. I wanna see you look absolutely sultry."


Gilbert kissed her and spun her around, "you know you want to have some fun with me. One little dance. For me."

"Fine. I guess… one little…" She ground her hips for a second and he burned, falling back onto the edge of the bed. She twisted the crop a bit and continued to blush as she straddled his lap.


She kissed him silent and held the crop behind his back, "this is completely inappropriate."

"This is hot."

"This is wrong."

"This is delicious."

"This is improper."

"This is awesome."


"Oh nein. I love this. I love you, mein liebling."

She raised a brow, "this…this is what turns you on? Me in a skimpy outfit that belongs in the garbage?"

"Oh, liebling, on anyone else it would be terrible. This just looks awesome on you though… Just look at this." He pulled her closer and started to nibble at her neck. "You are so gorgeous."

"…I think you might have had a drink."

"Nein… I haven't had anything."


"I might have had one mug of lager, but that was hours ago before all our action. You know what we need to do? I want to take~"

"Viveka, Feliciano is… hungry…again…" Ludwig paused and stared at them both. Gilbert, sitting on the bed, his pants unzipped and shirt laying on the ground in tatters. Viveka, in a garter belt and two piece, holding a crop and looking for all the world like the most attractive stripper to have ever lived.



Ludwig stared at them both in complete shock. "um…"

"West, I think you need to relax and take a deep breath and~"

"I think I'm just going to…uh…"

Viveka looked over at him and frowned, "are you okay?"

"I…I'll just come back…"

Gilbert laughed as his brother hurried out and Viveka hit him, "what is wrong with you? Your brother is in shock!"

"He's so turned on it's not funny! Did you see his face? Gott, he was so gone!"

"Gilbert! Go to your brother and explain this!"

"Viveka! This is ridiculous! He's fine. He'll probably just do Feli or some~"

"Mon fleur! Mon ami! I hear you both are having some fun!" Francis opened the door and whistled, "Mon Dieu, I knew this was happening when Ludwig went running. Ici, ici, don't let me ruin the fun!"

Viveka shrieked and hid behind Gilbert, who was quite livid. "WHAT THE HELL FRANCIS!"

"I am coming in to spread some joy, oui?"


"This is going to be fun."


Gilbert looked over his shoulder at the outraged Austrian and rolled his eyes, "Francis, come on. Get moving."

"I'll be right there~"

"Francis I swear to God I won't be responsible for killing you."

"Mon ami, this is insane."

Gilbert looked at him and sighed, "nein, this isn't going to happen."

"Mon ami~"

"What happened to Eliza?"

"She got mad when I asked her to come sleep with me."

Viveka stared at him, "you what?"

"I know! She was so unfair!"

Viveka groaned and leaned against Gilbert in exhaustion.

"Okay, yeah. Francis, get the hell out of here so I can get some."

"Like I said, don't let me stop you."


Viveka stood up and walked over to where Francis was. Francis looked at her in shock and lust. "mon fleur…belle… tres belle…"

She slammed the door in her face and walked back over. "I'm going to bed."


"To sleep," she held the whip threateningly, "just to sleep."

Gilbert moved over to where she was laying down and wrapped himself around her. "Let's go to sleep then."


"Shush, come on then. Francis ruined our fun…"

"We were not doing that."

"I know."

"Gute, because I mean it."

"I understand that."

"…I feel dirty."

Gilbert rolled his eyes and rolled her over, "nein, no saying that. You look sexier than hell. You don't get to say that."

"Did you not see Francis's face?" She shivered and he started to laugh, "HEY!"


"Did you just…"

"I'm sorry, that was inappropriate." She started to drop the crop and Gilbert kept it in her hand.

"Viv… that was the sexiest thing of all time."

"Are you a masochist?"

"Viveka…that was awesome."

She rolled her eyes and laid back down, facing away from him angrily. "You're unbelievable…"

"I love you too, babe."

"What is wrong with you?"

Gilbert rolled over onto her and trailed a finger down her chest, "I've grown addicted to you… Nice…" He leaned down and followed the path with his lips and she grew twenty shades of red.


"Oh what is this? You got the awesome me a present?" He undid the belt and grinned. "Hmm, well… this looks like an awesome present… I'll have to check this out further." He started to strip her the rest of the way and Viveka grabbed the sheets, flustered.

"Stop…I meant it…just sleep…"

"Come on, Viv. I wanna have that ridiculous look on your face again. The one where your nose wrinkles a bit and I have the deep urge to lick that mole right off your face."

She bit her lip and blushed even deeper. "…my nose doesn't wrinkle…"

Gilbert nibbled at her neck and grinned, "ja it does. It's pretty awesome."

She pushed at him and looked away, "stop Gilbert."

"Come on… just a little~"

"DAMN TOMATO BASTARD!" The door slammed open and Lovina came running in with Antonio chasing after her. They made it halfway across the room when they figured out just what room they had stepped into. "EW~"

"…um… amigos… we…uh…."


Viveka grabbed the blankets and held them to her chest, "WHY IS EVERYONE COMING IN HERE?"

"Hey, Lovina. Tonio. In case you haven't noticed, we have some awesome things going on in here so can you guys GET THE HELL OUT!"

Antonio laughed and grabbed Lovina. "Sorry amigo, come on Lovi."


"I don't expect you~"


Viveka stood up and stalked over to the two, "this is ridiculous. Out. Both of you. There are twenty four bedrooms in this house and I doubt that you both have to sleep in the same room."


"NEIN!" She shoved them both towards the door, "go to bed, stay in your own rooms, and if you decide to go into the same room, then it better be a two way agreement."

She shoved the door shut and Gilbert bit his lip to keep from laughing.

"Gilbert, I swear…"

"Honey, can you tell me exactly what you are wearing?"

She looked down and sighed, "that would explain Lovina's response…" she walked back over and curled up under the covers again. "I hate you right now."

"Mmm. I just started to love my life that much more. I have this awesome idea… can you stay nude all day?"


"What? It's gorgeous! I haven't seen all three of those guys go nuts like that since… yeah, but it was awesome!"

"Gilbert… I'm not going parading around like some doll~"

"Relax, I'm just kidding."

"Gilbert, I just want to sleep for right now."

"Okay, come on." He pulled her into his arms and shut his eyes. "Let's get some rest."




"You were awesomely hot."

She shifted a bit and he had a feeling she was smiling," …danke."


"I know!"

Gilbert grinned at them, "it was amazing."


"Don't even, you were hornier than hell by it!"

"Mon ami, that was just… I don't know how you got her in that outfit!"

"It wasn't easy…"



"She sounds mad amigo."

"She probably heard you four bastards." Lovina grinned, "I hope she shoots at you."

"Ve~ but Lovina! That would make Ludwig sad!"

"Pfft, who cares about that bastard's feelings?"


"You know what the issue is?" Gilbert picked up a muffin and grinned, "it's probably because I replaced her wardrobe."


"When did this occur?"

"While you were strapping her to the lie detector last night, do you know how hard it is to get a collection of new clothing in? I had to get rid of her clothes and replace them with new clothes? It's a huge hassle."


"Bruder… you took her clothes and replaced them?"

"Ja. It was awesome."

"Bruder… what did you do with her clothes?"

"I threw them out~"


"She seems kinda mad, doesn't she?"

"Mon ami, that was a horrible idea."

"Why? I think it was an awesome idea. Just think about how~"



Lovina laughed and shook her head, "you are so dead…"

Francis and Antonio shook their heads and Ludwig started to eat more. The door opened and the men all choked as Viveka walked into the room in a maid outfit. "GILBERT! WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES?"

Gilbert forced his food down and looked her over, "I knew you would look awesome in that."

"GILBERT! My clothes…"

"I know, they were boring… well, except a couple of them."


"I took care of them for you. This is awesome. Look at this!" He stood up and walked over, spinning her around a bit. The dress lifting a bit as she spun, she blushed and looked over at him.

"Gilbert…please just get my clothes for me."

"I like the clothes I got for you."

"Gilbert, get me my clothes back."

"Come on, at least try my gifts a while."


"A couple days."


"Nein, a week."

"An hour."

"HEY! No going down."

"A half hour."

"A week or I'll go torching."

"You wouldn't dare."

"Watch me."

"BOTH OF YOU! STOP IT!" Ludwig stood up and glared at them both. "Gilbert, give Viveka her clothes back! We've all got work to do. This…running around and jumping the nearest thing…We've got a killer to get! We've got no leads and a burned down house! Come on!"

"West, that's so boring!"

"I agree with Ludwig."

"And Viveka! You need to get to work or something. If we can split you and Gilbert for about five minutes with you two trying to chase each other's tails, we could probably get this case solved."

She rolled her eyes, "then by all means get to work then… I should be busy now anyway. I have to searching for my clothes."

"Or you could just~"

"GILBERT," both Viveka and Ludwig yelled at him and turned away.

"Geez, Un. Awesome. Un. Awesome."

Viveka rolled her eyes, "as if I really~"

Feliciano bounced over and whispered something to her. She stared at him in shock, "what?"

"It's true!"



Viveka turned and leaned close to Gilbert, kissing him and giving him a look that was… well… The most awesome look of all time... "I'll see you later, Gil. Work hard."

"I don't think he'll be working anything but hard, mon fleur."

Francis adjusted himself and Gilbert gave him a look before kissing Viveka back. "I'll see you later mein liebe. I gotta do my lame job."

She spun around and left the room and Lovina laughed again. "She is going to kill you potato bastard."

"Si, she is."

"You guys don't know what the heck you're talking about."

Ludwig sighed, "can we focus and get this job done?" He pulled his laptop up and turned it on. "We have to start this whole thing over again."

"Not exactly, Ludwig." Francis grinned, "mon petit Mona found some information about the fire. She thinks the person had an expertise in chemistry. They burned the house in minutes. She is looking into people with that kind of talent who would have had a relationship with Sadiq."

"Gute. We have someone doing work around here."

"Oui, unfortunately, Mon Dieu is taking a potty break and leaving me alone. I'm hoping he returns my patience soon."

Ludwig sighed, "ja… so we are looking for someone with a chemistry specialty of some…sort." He paused as he pulled out his phone and checked it. "Great… come on. All of you. We need to get to work…"

Lovina rolled her eyes, "you're all pathetic at killing. Geez, give me a gun and twenty minutes and I could have murdered you murderer~"

"Oh Lovi~ I still remember that man in Barcelona that tried to kill you."


"I love you too Lovi."

She blushed deeper and Ludwig nodded, "fine~"

"Ludwig! I just thought of something!"

"Um… let's talk about this later, Feliciano…"


They all stood up and Gilbert grinned, "pfft, you're all jealous of my awesome relationship."

"…yyyyeaaaah… Bruder. Stop talking and let's go."


"Si, let's go. I need to get to work." They left the Italians in the kitchen and out of the room. Walking into their cars, they drove off, heading to their offices.

Lovina looked over at the returning Viveka and shook her head. "please tell me that you are going to kill that idiot."


"Ve~ It does look good on you though… You look very pretty."

Viveka blushed deeply and Lovina looked over at Feliciano, "that was sweet of you… what do you think of me Feliciano?"



Feliciano stood up and grabbed his plate of pasta, "well…uh…"


Viveka shook her head. "I'm going to go look for my clothes now."