Hey guys, happy valentine's day. Thanks for all those who have reviewed. Means allot. This chapter is my Valentine 's Day gift to you all. Hope you enjoy it. There is some lemon inside, let's just say it's getting hot between the two main couples. XD.
Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha or any of its characters.
Chapter 11: Acceptance and Compromise
Inuyasha knew the precise moment Kagome discovered the truth. Her heart beat frantically; her silent cry of denial echoed through his mind. She believed herself to be a demon. She believed him a demon. What else could she possibly deduce with so little information? And with the way the humans have portrayed his race to be?
Inuyasha was surprised by how much he was finally starting to remember again. Their race, the Daemon is nothing like the demons that exist. Demons are the ones that have been murdering humans for their own selfish desires, they are the ones who have given up finding their other half's and surrendering to the true demons inside. -The demon inside- that all male Daemon are cursed with and without their lifemate to keep the inner demon away they will eventually turn into the one thing they have been fighting so hard, the true demon that the humans have portrayed them to be.
Even as a half Daemon it's possible for him to surrender to the darkness. However, he found his lifemate in time. And needed so desperately to change her and tie her to him forever. However, Inuyasha had no conception as to how she would react, he was so busy focusing on his needs, while he did not took into consideration how all this could become so overwhelming for her.
Her thoughts were desperate, even life threatening. He lay very still, gathered his strength should it be needed to stop any foolish decision she might make. He simply waited, monitoring her thoughts and the telltale signs of her body.
To be alone was a kind of agony in itself. Inuyasha would not have been able to bear it if his mind was not a shadow dwelling in hers. Sweat broke out, bathing his skin in a fine film. His every instinct was to force her back to his side, and he was gaining strength daily now. But a part of him wanted her to return to him on her own.
What had she said to him? Her mother was a human priestess. Kagome did not believe she was like him. Perhaps Kagome did not know her mother could have been one of them. There are many of his race who can blend in as one of the humans. Perhaps her mother was keeping it secrete from her two daughters, thinking that the two little children had enough to worry about as it is, trying to keep the jewel safe and all.
This would be so much easier if she knew the truth since the beginning. And now I have put her in such a situation. Keh! Inuyasha was frustrated with himself.
Their bond was strong. It had crossed man's boundaries. Inuyasha had assumed that she had known all her existence that one day her lifemate will come and claim her. Her mother should have prepared her for that. What if she had been human? He had been carelessly cruel that first day, wanting her bound to him, under his domination.
Inuyasha called on his fragmented memories. Three blood exchanges and must have inherited Daemon's blood from their ancestors. One is born a Daemon or not, there was no way to convert a human into one of their race. However, there has been cases that a human has inherited Daemon blood from their ancestors. Lately, male Daemons have not been able to successfully find and claim their lifemates. Thus, the women of their race would then mix with the humans thinking they will never meet their lifemate. This then laid roots to part humans part Daemons. And the process to convert one is with three blood exchanges.
Inuyasha closed his eyes against the guilt and remorse sweeping through his head. If she were part human, that would explain her strange feeding habits, her human ways. Whatever trauma she endured in the past it was harder for humans to cope with compared to Daemons. She never took necessary precautions, never scanned before leaving the cabin. She didn't know how. She also does not understand the necessity that the Daemons had for blood. For them it is common to drink blood now and then to replenish themselves. Of course, Daemons can consume normal human food, however if a Daemon wants to use his or her fool strength and powers. It was necessary to consume blood every month or so especially when a Daemon is wounded. If a Daemon goes a long time without blood they grow weaker and weaker and will become as weak as a human.
He cursed himself eloquently. He loathed himself for his inability to remember important information. It came only in fragments, and she was suffering because of his ignorance.
Kagome's bond with him had been so strong, it had never occurred to him that she was not a Daemon. He thought her courageous as a Daemon woman to dare venture near his prison and save him the way she did, and continue to care for him in his weakened mad state. It was nearly impossible to believe a human female had been so compassionate and brave to return to his side after the callous way he had treated her. She had been terrified, yet she had returned to him.
A scent drifted in with the night breeze. Game, fairly close. It wasn't human, but the fresh, living nourishment would help. If he could feed enough, he could safely make an exchange and try to keep Kagome alive. She was refusing food and even blood. Or perhaps not refusing. Perhaps she was unable to feed. He focused, inhaled deeply, and sent forth a call. Closer, closer, on the porch, the first step into the cabin. First one, a doe, usually a shy and skittish animal, padded across the floor to the side of the bed, her dark, liquid eyes fixed on him. A second doe and then a third followed, bunched together, awaiting his attention.
Hunger rose. Sharp fangs exploded into his mouth, and he seized the first doe with his enormous strength, found the artery pulsing in the neck. The wildness grew in him, rushed through him, and he welcomed it. Hot blood, pulsing with life, sweet and powerful, poured into his depleted system, swelling shriveled cells. He drank greedily, his hunger insatiable, his mutilated body craving the dark liquid of life.
Kagome lifted her face up to the cloudless sky, felt the tears on her cheeks. Her throat was raw and burning, her chest tight. If her father or mother had been one such as Inuyasha, contaminating her blood, Inuyasha had finished what her parents had started.
Her blood was beginning to match his. How she knew that she was not fully converted yet made no sense to her, but she knew somehow there was no way to reverse the effect.
She made an effort to control her trembling. She needed to think; it was her only salvation. Her brain could overcome any problem. She breathed deeply, calming herself as she always did in any threatening situation. At once she thought of Inuyasha alone and helpless in the cabin. She couldn't desert him. She would never leave him when he was so helpless. She would set things up for him so he could survive on his own. She would no longer eat or drink anything other than water. She couldn't take any chances until she was certain what she was dealing with.
She wandered downstream, away from the cabin. She felt very alone. This time her mind insisted she had to reach out to him. She needed his warmth, the reassurance of his touch. Kagome turned that thought over. Inuyasha obviously was telling her the truth. She had been alone her entire life. She had not needed anyone, least of all a creature whose mind was shattered, whose nature was that of a killer. Yet she had to know he was not suffering, that nothing had happened to him while she was gone.
Deliberately she waded into the stream, the ice-cold water shocking her, numbing her body but not her mind. Imposing her will, strong and disciplined through a childhood of isolation, Kagome resisted merging with him. The water was so cold, she could no longer feel her feet, but it helped to clear her head somewhat. Inuyasha released the third deer and inhaled sharply. Kagome was strong-willed.
He knew she would try her best to resist their bond. Her childhood had been hell, yet she had survived, and it had shaped her into a strong, brilliant, courageous woman. He longed to calm her, to reassure her, but knew she would not welcome his intrusion. She had reason to fear him. He remembered so few things. Betrayal. Pain. Rage.
He had been so clumsy in his handling of her, in his handling of everything. The deer stirred, stumbled to their feet, and, wobbling unsteadily, plodded out to the freedom of the forest. Inuyasha would have finished them off, utilized every drop of life-giving nourishment he could, but Kagome would have thought him a monster. His body tuned itself to hers, craved the sight and scent of her, the touch of her. Perhaps he was a monster. He really didn't know anything other than that he needed Kagome.
Kagome wandered aimlessly until she could no longer think of anything but Inuyasha. The emptiness inside her yawned like a enormous black void. Her skin crawled with need, her mind was chaos, reaching, always reaching, so that she was worn out with fighting herself.
What if something had happened to him? Again the thought crept in unbidden, unwanted, and her sense of isolation increased, threatened to become a terrible thing. Grief welled up, enveloping her, driving away her logic and reason, leaving raw, gaping emotions. Kagome could no longer function properly, and she knew it. Whether or not her pride allowed, she had no choice but to go back. It was not only humiliating but frightening, too. Inuyasha had acquired more power over her in a short time than she had ever thought possible. She had no choice but to accept it for the moment.
She walked slowly, reluctantly, dread filling her, yet with every step back toward the cabin, toward Inuyasha, the heaviness of her heart lifted. At the edge of the clearing before the cottage, three large deer rested beneath the swaying branches of a tree. She stood for a moment watching them, all too aware of what had transpired. Kagome stepped onto the porch, hesitated, and went inside.
Inuyasha was lying motionless in the bed, his gold eyes wide open, fixed unblinkingly on her face. Kagome felt as if she were falling forward into those gold, fathomless depths. He held out a hand to her. She didn't want to go to him; she went because she had to go. She needed to go to him. A part of her brain analyzed that, how it could possibly be, but she went without fighting the strong compulsion.
His fingers, unexpectedly warm, closed around the coolness of hers, his hand enveloping hers. He tugged at her gently until she had no choice but to sit, then lie beside him. His gold eyes never once relinquished their hold on hers.
You are cold, little black hair. His voice whispered over her skin, mesmerized her mind, dispelled the chaos to replace it with a soothing, tranquil calm.
Allow me to warm you.
His hand shaped her face, traced each delicate bone, stroked down her throat. Kagome blinked, confused, unsure whether she was awake or dreaming. Her body moved restlessly. Again her brain attempted to sort things out for her, but she could not pull away from his hypnotic eyes. Part of her didn't want to.
She wanted to be trapped there for all time, sheltered by him, belonging to him.
Ignoring the screaming protest of his body, Inuyasha shifted so that his large frame half pinned her smaller one to the bed. His hand continued to caress the soft, vulnerable line of her throat, moved to trace the neckline of her cotton top.
Feel the way our hearts beat together. His hand pushed the concealing fabric aside so that her full breasts gleamed in the twilight of the sunset.
His mind felt the protest of hers, his soft voice murmuring to weave her deeper under his spell. In the depths of his eyes was hunger, fire, need. He trapped the sapphire blue of her eyes in the intensity of his hot gaze. A slash of razor-sharp talons, and cotton floated to the floor. His hand found warm softness, and with his gold stare still holding hers, he slowly lowered his head.
Kagome's breath caught in her throat as his perfect mouth hovered a scant inch above hers. She burned for him. Burned. Her long lashes swept down as his mouth fastened on hers. She nearly cried out at the rush of liquid heat racing through her body at his touch. His mouth explored every inch of hers, caressing, demanding, gentle, and dominant, a sweet stroking along her incisors, a stark male possession.
His mouth left hers to trail kisses down her throat, her shoulder, lower to find the swell of her breast. Kagome's hands found his hair, its rich softness bunched in her fists as his tongue traced a path over her pulse. Her body clenched, waited in anticipation. His teeth nipped gently, moved again so that she shuddered with pleasure as his mouth drew her rich softness into its moist heat.
I want you, Kagome. I need you.
And it was true. His body didn't seem to understand that claiming her was an impossibility. He hurt, a pain to rival all the others. His skin burned and was unbearably sensitive. Reluctantly he released her breast, moved once more to stroke his tongue over her pulse.
Kagome. He murmured her name, and his teeth sank deep.
She gasped at the white-hot lance of pain, the wave of intense pleasure washing over her. Her body arced upward, her arms cradling his head.
It was ecstasy, holding her like this, feeding on sweetness, exploring her softness with his hands. The pleasure was such that Inuyasha' battered body swelled, every muscle taut, rigid. She tasted hot, spicy, addicting. He needed to bury himself in her as he fed. Every natural instinct he possessed, as both man and beast, urgently demanded he unite them in the way of his people, sealing them together for all eternity. Her breasts were soft, perfect, driving him to the brink of madness. Did her ribcage have to be so small and delicate, her waist so tiny? He didn't just want. He needed. He lifted his head, his tongue stroking across the tiny wound, reluctantly closing it.
Kagome's eyes were closed, her body soft and pliant.
You need, my love. He kissed her gently.
Kiss me, my chest. Let me feel that your need is as great as my own.
It was sheer black magic, an erotic whisper of seduction she seemed helpless to resist. Her mouth tasted his skin, lingered, found his throat, the heavy muscles of his chest. Inuyasha knew he was playing with fire. His body could not take much more. His hand caught the nape of her neck, pressed her head to him.
You hunger, my love.
Self-preservation interceded, and her body stiffened.
Inuyasha' voice was purity itself.
You will take what I freely offer. It is my right, and you cannot deny me.
The touch of her tongue sent fire racing through his blood. When her teeth pierced his skin, he cried out with the ecstasy of it. He gave himself up to the sensual pleasure, his hand stroking her hair, encouraging her feeding. He needed this closeness, this erotic intimacy. If he could not have all of her at this moment, he could at least ensure their bond.
He held her, blanketing her body in the age-old dominant way of his people, yet there was tenderness in his hands as they caressed her. Slowly his hand slid over her silky hair, stroked, lingered, moved around to trace the delicate lines of her face. Then carefully he began to insert his hand between her mouth and his chest. Enough, Kagome. Close the wound with your tongue. His gut clenched hotly, his body shuddered as she obeyed him. He wanted her, needed, even hungered for their union. For a moment he felt that need was far more tormenting than wounds.
He caught her hair in both hands, dragged her head up to his, when everything in him screamed to push her down, to force her to give him some relief. Inuyasha felt as if he was in hell all over again. His mouth found hers, tasted his own blood. Something inside him raised its head and roared, wild, untamed, something close to breaking free of his tight control. Instinctively his mind sought hers.
The summons was sharp, on the edge of desperation. Kagome blinked, found herself tangled on the bed with Inuyasha, her skin rubbing against his, his arms tight, vise-like bands around her, his mouth taking hers with such expertise that her entire body raged for him. He was aggressive, dominant, the position he held her in one of submission. When she looked up at him, his eyes went from desperation, hungry desire, and tenderness to a bestial glow, that of a wild animal taking what belonged to it. She recognized those red flames leaping, betraying the violence in him. Magenta stripes appeared on his cheeks when they were not there before. When she stiffened, tried to struggle, a warning growl rumbled deep in his throat.
Kagome went very still, forced her mind away from panic and fear, back toward logic. He had called to her in need. The moment she realized that, she relaxed, holding him in her arms with acceptance. He needed her, and she could do no other than help him. His hands were everywhere, rough, hurting even; his teeth bit at her much too hard.
Inuyasha. Deliberately she sought the red haze of his mind. She was calm, tranquil, accepting of his bestial nature.
Come back to me.
He latched on to her like a drowning man, merging his mind with hers. He was breathing hard, in such pain. She could feel the dark desire beating at him, the demand that he claim what was rightfully his. Inuyasha struggled for control of the monster within him. Kagome kissed his throat, the hard line of his jaw, a soothing, gentle touch.
It's all right. Come back to me.
He buried his face in her neck, crushed her tightly to him. He was exhausted, in pain, afraid he had driven her even further away. It was Kagome who stroked his hair, murmured soothing nonsense, Kagome who lay soft and pliant close to his heart. Her palm shaped the side of his face, a physical contact; her mind merged firmly, wholly, with his.
I am sorry. Inuyasha rested his chin on top of her head, unwilling to face the condemnation he feared would be reflected in her eyes.
Ssh, just be still. I should never have left you alone.
You did not cause this. His arms tightened momentarily. Kagome, do not think that. You are not to blame for my madness. My body needs yours. The mating between lifemates is not exactly the same as human mating. I nearly hurt you, Kagome. I am sorry.
You're the one in pain, Inuyasha, she pointed out gently. She realized she was using their mental link, accepting it as natural. She sighed, reached up to kiss his chin.
They held each other like two children after a terrible fright, taking comfort in one another's closeness.
Kagome became aware after a time that her skin was against his, bare, sensitive, her breasts pressed into his side.
"I don't suppose you want to tell me what happened to the top part of my night dress."
She lay motionless, drowsy and content. Being so close to him should have bothered her, but it simply seemed normal. Her gaze found the some material of her dress slashed to ribbons, scattered on the floor beside the bed.
"You were in a bit of a hurry, I see," she pointed out, making an effort to get up to get dressed.
When Kagome would have pulled away from him, Inuyasha refused to relinquish his hold. Instead, he reached lazily for the quilt and pulled it around her. His smile was in her mind.
Tell me of your childhood. He dropped the words into the silence, felt her shock, her pain, her instant withdrawal.
I want you to tell me this yourself, Kagome. I could look into your memories, but it is not the same as your trusting me with something so personal.
He had already seen her childhood, the terrible way she had grown up alone. Inuyasha wanted her to share it with him, to give him the priceless gift of her trust.
Kagome could hear the strong, steady beat of his heart, a soothing rhythm. It seemed only fair that she share her nightmare when she had glimpsed the dark stain on his soul.
"I became aware something was wrong with my mother at a very early age. She would go for weeks at a time, never noticing if me and my sister ate or slept or was hurt. Our grandfather had to take case of us most of the time. She had no friends, people admired her, but she really did not have many friends, any that I have seen at least. She was almost never home. She rarely showed interest or affection, only when she began our training. Only then my mother would show me and my sister Kikyo some affection, when we were progressing further in our training."
"Yeah, to protect this." Kagome pointed to the necklace around her neck. It was half of a jewel shard, the other half was nowhere around.
When inuyasha saw it, his eyes grew wider. For some reason he recognized this piece of jewel shard. However, when he tried to search his memories his head began to ache. He let it go.
Kagome noticed the distress, but saw inuyasha recovered from it.
"As I said before, your memories will come back in time inuyasha." But she wondered why he seemed to recognize the jewel. She continued.
"You see the Higurashi clan has been given the duty to protect this jewel from those who seek it to use it for evil and selfish desires. It used to be a full jewel, but the night before my mother was killed when she returned to the village she only had half of the jewel. No one knows what happened to the other jewel. It has been my task since then to look for the other half of the jewel while protecting this one."
"It was my mom's last wish for me, but it also included Kikyo. I thought I would be together with her. But she…. was jealous…. And so full of anger that my mother did not entrusted her with the jewel. We split ways right after our mother's death."
Kagome became silent.
Inuyasha' hand slid over her hair in a caress, found the nape of her neck in a comforting massage. The distress in her voice was almost more than he could bear.
"I was 12 years old when I met her again with Naraku by her side."
Inuyasha growled at the name. Anger swirling, rage flooding him, consuming him, a need to kill arose and for a moment red flames glowed in the depths of his gold eyes. Kagome who should have been scared out of her mind, placed a trembling hand on his face. Bringing him back from the depths of his hatred. His fingers encircled her wrist as if an anchor keeping him from losing control. With an effort he pushed down the demons, angry with himself for frightening her. His thumb feathered lightly over the inside of her wrist, making him all too aware of her pulse racing frantically.
"Inuyasha are you, alright?"
Yes I am. His family is the cause for my suffering and for my family. And I understand that he is no different from his father and grandfather.
"Oh, I am sorry to hear that Inuyasha." And she truly was. She never wanted anyone else to suffer especially by the hands of that family.
Why was your sister with Naraku? Inuyasha said all of a sudden.
"I don't know. When I saw her that day, I was so happy to see her. Because, the two years we had been a part was so hard for me. One day, all of a sudden started chasing after me, I could only just assume it was for the piece of jewel I protected. I ran and ran for two years keeping a low profile, they placed a bounty on my head. It was so hard to get food, most of my childhood was me starving, coping with my mother's death, staying low, and trusting no one, because as soon as I would trust someone they would later betray me just for the reward money. I don't even know how they found out that I had the jewel in my possession. "
She was silent for so long that Inuyasha touched her mind, felt her childhood self-loathing, her fears, and her sense of isolation. His arms tightened, drew her closer to his powerful frame, wanting to shelter her for all time. He knew what it meant to be alone. Totally alone. He never wanted her to feel like that
Kagome felt the light brush of Inuyasha' mouth on her forehead, at her temple, in her hair. His tenderness warmed her when she was shivering inside. ""But, my happiness was short lived as she pointed her bow at me and told me to hand over the shard. A man appeared next to her. And I recognized him right away. He looked just like the Onigumo the one who murdered my mother. I knew then that, that must have been his son Naraku. And all my questions were later answered; my sister betrayed me and joined forces with the ones that murdered our mother. I escaped barely alive with the help of some guy who came out of nowhere."
A guy? He probed gently, afraid she would stop sharing what were obviously painful memories. He had no real way to ease her hurt except with the strength of his arms and the closeness of his body. He did not like the sound of another guy in Kagome's life even if this guy saved her life.
"Yeah. One second I was awaiting my death and the next he jumped out of nowhere and I was in his arms. We escaped but not far enough, the enemy surrounded us again. Both of us together were not fast enough to outrun them, so he suggested we parted ways, but not before he asked me to be his wife. He was a weird guy. But, yeah I never got a good glimpse of him. We parted ways as soon as our paths had crossed.
Inuyasha suppressed a growl, whoever this guy was Inuyasha was thankful. But, if this guy ever came near his lifemate again with that kind of intention he would not regret to end the life of this stranger. Yet this stranger's personality sounded so familiar to him as well. He just shoved the thought out of his mind.
Kagome laughed well aware what was transpiring in her lifemates mind.
Hope you all liked the latest chapter. I will try to update faster, but I am in Japan and it's hard to write while I am touring and going to university.
Please review! I would like to here your toughts. Till next time ! XD