1 The Greatest Of These

By: McCord

Disclaimer: Harry Potter, his world, and other characters are not mine, nor ever will be, but are the property of JKR. I am making no money off this little vignette, but was really for my own benefit emotionally.

A/N: This fic is inspired heavily by thoughts I've had over the years since reading two of C.S. Lewis' theological writings: The Screwtape Letters and Mere Christianity. You will see a small glimpse into my worldview, and also, some of my emotions over 9/11/01. Two verses are used from the Christian Bible: 1 Corinthians 13:4,13, and Matthew 10:39. This isn't an attempt to convert or offend someone with different spiritual beliefs, or to try and make Harry Potter into a Christian character. Instead, I've tried placing myself into Harry's shoes during the war with Voldemort and what I would feel and think faced with those circumstances. Since my views on the world and how I think are shaped largely by my personal beliefs, the following story is what the end result was.

Darkness is a myth.

Evil isn't an entity in the way most people would think; in reality, it is only the perversion of good. The argument that 'There can be no good without evil' is not true. I believe, and during these horrible times I have to believe that, ultimately, humanity was created to do good. It is only our choices that cause evil.

Everything evil can be stripped down to a perversion of something good. Murder is the perversion of the joy of created life into the joy of destroying it. Pain is the perversion of sensing some pleasurable into something that hurts. Adultery is the perversion of the physical expression of emotion between lovers and into the lust expressed between two people.

Cynicism is the opposite of faith. Despair is the opposite of hope. Hate is the opposite of love.

'And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love.'

Will that ultimately be what brings his downfall? Love? Since that fateful night when he came back to power, I find myself constantly pondering this; worried that in defeating him, I will become him. Worried that the feelings for justice for his evil will turn to revenge, that the love for my parents that saved me will become hatred for him and the world that allowed him to rise, and in the end that I myself will be consumed by it.

I have to constantly remind myself why I fight. I've seen so much in my short life, more than a teenage boy should have. So often, it threatens to overwhelm me, and I have this urge to flee and never return. To do so, I know, would doom the world, and for that reason I cannot. I'm not braver or more courageous than others, I just force myself to do things that I wish I didn't have to do. Or maybe that is bravery after all.

I continuously remind myself that darkness is a myth; it is not an entity, it is the absence of light. This world, right now, is in darkness. There is an absence of faith that justice will prevail, an absence of hope that we will endure, and an absence of love for the world. Most people are cowering in fear, waiting for the hammer to fall. What they don't know or don't understand is that is exactly what he wants.

He doesn't want light, because he craves the dark. It fills him, makes him stronger. He who rejected that which is light has to have the dark to survive.

I, who grew up without the light, now crave it more than anything. I want, I desire love more than anything else; I want to feel it surround me, penetrate me; infuse me with the warmth needed to face him without cowering. Love is what will give me the strength to ward off the darkness; to bask in love is to bask in the very light we were created for. That is our purpose on this earth: to love. Everything else is secondary and infused in that one purpose.

I didn't have love growing up, but I've been shown so much and have received so many blessing from the love of others.

From Ron, I learned the love a brother, the love between best friends that assures me that he will be standing by my side whenever needed.

From Hermione, I learned the love of a confidant, the one I can go to when I just need someone to listen, to be there. She is always ready with a possible solution, but she never gives it until I ask.

From Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, I learned the love of parents, who give everything they have to make their children happy. They have always given freely, though I was not one of their own.

From Fred and George, Percy, Charlie, and Bill, I learned the love of a family, one that sticks together through thick and thin, that backs each other up, and draws strength from each other during times of need.

From Remus and Sirius, I have learned the love of a mentor, someone to turn to for advice no matter what, and know that they will do their best to help me through my struggles.

From Dumbledore, I have learned the love of a benefactor, someone that looks deep into you and sees something that you never would have alone and works to foster that ability, to make you understand your purpose. You never understand of appreciate the people who do that until later, but they often have some of the biggest impact on your life.

And finally, from Ginny…

I have learned the meaning of the phrase 'Love is patient.' She has taught me the thing I needed to understand most: that love is not an emotion; it is an action. In everything she does, she loves. She chose to love me even when I was not aware of it, and she chose to love me when I finally pulled my head out of the sand. She loved me when I was in trouble, and when I was being showered with praise. Through thick and thin, she did not stop what she chose to do, and that was to love.

I don't know what I've done to deserve her love, but maybe that's the point. We're human, we make mistakes; none of us truly deserve the love that others give us. We choose to love anyway, despite that.

It's with this thought that I fight: 'Those who find their life will lose it, and those who lose their life will find it.' I've never truly had a life of my own; I've either been alone, or been in danger my entire life. I choose to fight, I choose to love, because by doing so, I will not lose my life, but for the first time, truly find it.