A/N: (rewritten as of 6/1/13: I'm revamping this story and god, I was such a loser back then.)

1. Call Edward a sparkly pixie.

"Hey. Hey Edward. Hey. Edward. Hey-"

"What?" Edward replied irritably.

I dropped my wide grin.

"I know what you are," I proclaimed solemnly. "A pixie."

"What?" He stared at me in disbelief.

"Don't deny it! You're pale," I listed, "you sparkle, you poop glitter-"

"I don't poop-"

"DON'T INTERUPT! Now, if I could just find out how you hide your wings…"

2. Ask Edward if he pukes glitter.

"EDWARD!" I hollered.

"I'm right next to you!" he snapped.

I grinned. "Do you…" I dramatically paused.


"Do you…"



He sighed. "Vampires can't vomit-"

I cut him off. "DO YOU PUKE GLITTER?" I screamed in his ear.

Then, I ran.