He didn't want to hurt him, but he knew it couldn't be helped. After all he did say he didn't know how he felt. Shirou had said that he understood,that it was okay even if this once was a mistake. After all it is not like he was consciece during the other times. Fully regreting the harsh treatment he had given the wolf in the past, after all that happened, he did want to be friends. Not pretend friends but real friends. That was all he could give him. Alittle suprised with himself at his train of thought, he looked past the empty desk where Pres. usually sat to the door hoping to see him today. Silently hoping that he understood and knowing that he needed his space to get over the feelings he had for him.
As he entered the school, he hoped that Madarame wouldn't be upset with him for not returning his phone calls. He just needed a little bit of space. He didn't mean to make everyone worry, it is just something that he needed for himself. After all he loved him for so long that even though he said it was okay if it was a mistake it still hurt. But at least he got to have him as himself, Shirou silently thought to himself. Wondering if Madarame would go back to being a jerk now or if things would be different, as he walked into the class and sat down at his desk, he didn't even notice the blonds eyes on him till he spoke.
"Pres. err uhm," not really knowing what to say but feeling like he needed to say something.
Shirou was a little suprised to see Madarame a little nervious,' remembering what he said that day.'
" I don't know if I can be with you, but I don't want to hurt you either." Yonikuni stated bluntly.
Shock washed over Shirou as he heard Madarame confess. After all he is not the type to talk about how he feels. Not knowing how to anwser Shirou remained quiet and just looked at him waiting for him to continue.
" It is not like it was before, I mean I don't hate you but..." Not sure how to finish without hurting the wolf he paused.
" You don't feel it like that." Shirou answered for him. " I want to be friends only. I don't want that kind of relationship with you." he stated flatly. 'The hurt look in Shirou's eyes had him wondering what to say to him, after all it is partly his fault for seeking him out even if he was not consience at the time. " But I undertand if you don't want to friends with me. I had you be my pretend friend for so long that it might be uncomfortable for you considering everything else. "
Alittle taken back by the fact that Madarame ment real friends not pretend, the hurt look was replaced by a puzzled one. Could he really just be just friends with him, could he get over the pain he felt deep in his chest. " I don't know.." he said alittle shakily. " Might need some time I think to get over the way I feel If I can. And being around you will not help me do that." They had agreed to spend the summer apart as much as they could. After all Madarame had said he was going to help him learn to control his soul. So they decided he would come by the faimly restraurnt and see his older brother Shinbo for the lessons. With Madarame working for the summer they wouldn't see each other, and he was still Kunimsa and Norio's friend after all. Besides it was there responsiblity to help him since his real parents were gone. Who else would is going to, he is not a monkey any more and doesn't know anything about being a madarauri.
The teacher walking in to the class room brought Shirou back to reality. Noticing that Madarame was waiting for a reaction from him or for him to say something, He smiled lightly and nodded his that now was not the time to talk. Madarame was his old self except for the fact that he didn't seem indifferent toward him like he use to be. A small twinge in his chest, had him turn and face the board. He still had feelings for the blond, knowing that nothing would ever come of it. He was just satisfied with being his friend. At least he could have that for real this time. He silently thought to himself. He had managed to find a way to ease some of the pain. Having his space during the summer really helped. But not all the feelings could be over come, he stilled cared.
Seeing the reasuring smile and nodd that the wolf had givin him, he sighed inwardly and focused on the chalk board and to what the teacher was saying. At least he could make up for some of the pain he had caused the wolf. Although he did not love him the idea of Shirou not being his friend bothered him a little. He really didn't have any real friends, and for once in his life thought that he would like to have just one. Dispite the way things have turned out both thought that it was something that they both could be fine with. The bell had rang indicating that it was time for lunch, neither one got up right away. But after most everyone had cleared out Madarame asked if Shirou wanted to join him and his brother for lunch. Telling him that Norio would be there as well since he was not with Kunimasa. Kunimasa and Norio where doing good, expecally since Kunimasa finally admited that he really did like the "Returner".
After a moment Shirou agreed and they both started walking towards an empty class room where not many people came to they sat down and waited for Kunimasa and Norio, a guy with long white hair raced in the room and placed his back to the wall and eyes closed, next to the door and out of sight of anyone passing in the hall way. From the color of the uniform they could tell he was a second year. A group of girls both second and third years raced by, they could be heard asking 'where did he go? Wondering why the young man was hiding from the girls. They were about to inquire but he then turned to the door and peered down both sides to the hall before turning to the two of them.
The sight of the youth surprised Madarame and Fujiwara. Not only was his hair a unique color but so where his eyes. They could tell he was a Madarauri but not sure what he was exactally. He seemed very good at controlling his soul. They caught a small trace of his scent as a light breeze passed and pushed the musky scent toward and around the two. Niether one had ever smelled such a scent before. Sure Fujiwara was new to this but Madarame was shocked to say the least. Never before had he come across such a scent. Madarame looked the boy over, realizing his first impression that his hair had to be dyed was false. It was White, not a really light blond just flat really was indeed his hair color. Two long strips of hair fell down the sides of his head framing his face to a little passed his chin. His face was not to girly yet not masculine either. He was maybe 5'8",slender not skinny and you could tell he was very tone under his tight shirt and had a smooth sensual look about him. High cheek bones and his lips where not really full yet not thin either. Most amazing still the blond thought was his eyes they where a little darker then lavender and not yet voilet.
The young man looked at them and with a small spark his eyes locked on to Madarame's as he stated " Excuse me, I don't mean to bother you. Just didn't feel like getting mobbed today."
" Oh that is alright we were just waiting on some friends to join us for lunch. So no worries." Fujiwara had said to him with a smile. The boy then smiled back and then turned and left with a short "see ya" they both were shocked by the sight. He was a very atrractive young man. Attractive wasn't the word for him, he was down right beautiful Madarame thought to himself. The boy left the room before either one could ask his name,and Madarame let out a hard breath. He had not even noticed that he was holding his breath. Almost as if not to catch the scent that the boy had, it was overwelming. Casting a glace at Fujiwara noticing that he seem to be affected the same way he was made him feel a little better at least He wasn't the only one. As his pulse slowed to a normal rythum. He tryed to push the confussion and puzzlement out of his mind as Kunimasa and Norio walked in. Why the Hell did a man make him have that kind of reaction? Not even the time he fucked Fujiwara did he feel like that. The closest thing he had felt with the wolf was heat and a sence of peace. Not this overwelming need. So why? And a Man of all things! It had to be mistake there was no way he the self proclaimed Manhater had that kind of reaction to a man. It was nothing just as with Fujiwara. Detrimation set in as he decieded that he would forget ever having that feeling, and that it never happened.
Grabbing the bag that had his lunch in it. He grabbed his lunch and passed it on to Kunimasa and Norio. Yonekuni was having samon and rice with a glazed sauce. Having a familiy that owned a restranut had it's advantages. He Knew how to cook, and was able to make something good and different everytime. He liked having a varity, was never one to have the same thing over and over and over again. But he was a little lazy so the quicker it was to make the better.