Detention: JP, SS, LE, SB, RL, PP, 5th years

For: Not the last time

Assignment: Journal, day seven, LE, SS, SB


I woke up around seven o'clock and went down to breakfast with my friends. We were all made up and enjoying ourselves again, and it was wonderful to be able to just talk about the dance like we'd never had any problems between us. I told them about finding out that James was the mime. Alice told me about how she'd managed to dance almost the entire night with Frank. It was wonderful.

Unfortunately, they still couldn't give me advice on whether to be mad at James or not. A part of me feels like I should, after all, he danced with me for quite a while without telling me who he was, but on the other hand, he was quiet, respectful, and he didn't pester me to dance, I willingly accepted. He didn't make any snide comments toward Severus, in fact, he didn't glance in his direction or glare at him once! I just don't know what to do!

I avoided James for the entire day, and Remus too, for good measure. I didn't want to babble out all of my confusion only for Remus to tell James that his hard work was finally paying off. Granted, Remus wouldn't share my secrets, but he certainly would give James hints about it. What's wrong with me? I hate James most of the time, but now? I just don't know. He's actually trying to be nice for a change, at least to me. He's even not been so utterly awful to Severus for the last three days, though I'm wondering if that just means that something bigger is being planned for later.

I sure know how to pick them, don't I? My goodness, first Smith, now Potter. What is the world coming to? I wish I could talk to Remus or Severus about the way James is acting, after all, they are boys, but they're both so close to the matter, one would tell me he's changing for the worse, the other for the better. I need someone who will tell me an honest assumption without being personally involved in the situation.

I think I'm going to take a walk and see if I can find a Hufflepuff.

Sirius's Journal

My alarm went off at ten o'clock this morning to ensure that I didn't miss lunch. I do that every Sunday, because before I did that I would sleep until one and be starving. It never bothered the others, because I spelled it so that it would alert me and be silent to all others. Therefore, unlike every other day of the week, I was almost always awake first on Sundays.

Anyway, I turned my alarm clock off. As soon as it stopped beeping, the memories of last night/this morning came back to me. "JAMES FREAKING HAROLD POTTER!" James opened one eye and looked at me. Remus groaned and I felt really bad. I hadn't meant to wake Remus up, and he was going to need all the sleep he could get, since the full moon was tomorrow. And the next day and the next. I wish there was a potion that I could make and just cure him. Remus is the nicest guy anyone will ever meet, except on three days of the month. And so a lot of people, when they find out what he is, hate him. It's just not fair! Remus doesn't deserve anything like that! I wish I could just hex the lot of those prejudiced fools to Antarctica.

…But anyway, back to the story. I yelled at James and woke Remus up, and he must have been really tired, because he jerked the sheet out from under James instead of me. I just stared at him in shock. I'm sure my jaw was somewhere near the ground. Remus just calmly retreated to his bed and pulled out a fat book on wandlore, his latest academic pursuit. I was still staring at him.

Then James was like "Whaaaaat?" in a whiny voice, as though he didn't know why I was annoyed with him.

"Do you know what I did for you last night? Do you know how much I proved myself a Gryffindor for you? And then, AND THEN, you have the NERVE to NOT SHOW UP AT THE DANCE? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, POTTER?"

And then, and then, he started giggling. I nearly lost it right there. I was about to punch him in the face and let him sleep for another three or four hours, but he got himself under control and said, "You really think I wasn't there?" Which stopped me cold.

"You mean you really were there?" He nodded. I began to yell again. Though, reading over James's diary, you don't need the conversation repeated twice. Once I found out he was the mime, my brain and mouth disconnected, though James's diary and Remus say that I didn't say anything worthy of repeating to you here. Remus then snapped me back into normalcy by changing the subject and asking about Lily. James proceeded to prove that he was an idiot, then dressed and went to the Common Room. I also put clothes on, and realized that the dorm room smelled vaguely of soap and vomit. I asked Remus about it, but I think he was trying to go back to sleep, because he didn't answer me. I didn't want to bother him further, so I grabbed my schoolbag and left. Once downstairs, I made sure that I had Werewolves, Animangi, and other Such Transformations in the bag. I was studying up on werewolves, trying to see if there was anything that I could do to help Remus at all, like maybe chocolate lessened the pain of transformations, in which case I would buy him a lifetime supply of it (and even if it didn't help him, I feel like he wouldn't turn it down. He's addicted). And it wasn't as if the rest of the book was uninteresting. I'm really interested in Animangi, ever since you mentioned it in class back in third year. I think that becoming an Animangus would be a great boon when I become an Auror, and also, I could turn into an animal! Hopefully a dog. And I'm sure it could help me out a lot when I take the disguise test in Auror training. Also, when I retire, I can turn into a dog, and be a therapy dog for children at St. Mungo's or something. Or I could be a werewolf therapy dog! That would be the best! And I would be the oldest dog ever, because I'll retire somewhere about eighty-four and then multiply by seven…





In dog years, I'd be almost six hundred years old! That would be awesome!

Minnie, can I have a dog for a pet at school? I mean, an owl is fine and well, but the school has owls, and I'm sure that Hagrid would be happy to take care of the dog while I was in detention and stuff. We could name it Fang and share it. What do you think, Minnie? It would be an excellent way to teach me responsibility, yes? Please say yes? I'll make sure it doesn't poop in the castle or chase you while you're in your cat form or anything like that! Fang will be the best behaved dog ever! And think of the alternative, if I get Hagrid a puppy, maybe he won't be so intent on getting a dragon as a pet instead.

I went horribly off topic there, didn't I? Oh well. Nothing very exciting happened. I ended up studying and putting the finishing touches on my part of Remus's gift. He's going to act at first like he hates it and probably yell at us for being stupid and possibly endangering ourselves by making his gift, but secretly he will appreciate it and as the months wear on, he'll probably grow to enjoy it. But I can't tell you what it is, Minnie, sorry. It's a secret.


Day Six

I hate Blacks. I really do. I think when I become of age I'll move to Siberia and be rid of them all. Sirius may not even be the worst of them, much as I'd like to believe otherwise. Sirius, Narcissa, Regulus, Bella, Andromeda, Walburga, all of them! Somehow I seem to have become the Black Family's personal pet project. I wonder how many of them actually know that I'm a halfblood, and not a pureblood like most of the House seems to believe. I know that Lucius knows, but does his wife? Do his in-laws? Would they meddle in my life so much if they knew that I was a halfblooded freak?

But you, Professor, probably don't care about my little tiffs with pureblooded families, so I suppose I shall write the last entry of this detention assignment. Here it is: Regulus woke me up this morning again, and again it was because of the dance. He's worse than a female Ravenclaw. I find it rather fitting that that was what his date ended up being the most annoying, gossipy, truth-twisting Ravenclaw in the entire school, Rita Skeeter. Naturally, she only stuck around for the first dance before running off to hang someone else's dirty laundry out in public. However, Regulus doesn't understand that she's not really interested and has come to ask me for dating advice. Dating advice! From me! He was wondering if Ravenclaws preferred romantic dates or intelligent dates like taking painting classes together or something! And he didn't remember the entire night. He had definitely been drunk at the dance. Idiot. He's just like his brother. Finally, I got so annoyed at his constant babbling that I told him that he had gotten so drunk that he ended up kissing two guys, which several people including Rita Skeeter had taken pictures of and then ran off to the kitchens with a House Elf. He freaked out and ran out of the room, likely to either ask a second opinion or have a little talk with Miss Skeeter about this. Another relationship probably destroyed. I'm a horrible person; no wonder people hate me.

And speaking about destroyed relationships…I went to breakfast before all of the other Slytherins this morning except Regulus, who gave me a death glare and promptly moved to the other end of the table when I approached. As I sat down, an owl soared down from the rafters and dropped three letters in front of me. Meanwhile, Sybil walked over from the Ravenclaw table. I stood up to greet her, and she slapped me across the face. Like most things she did, it surprised me so much I didn't know how to react. She had tears streaming down her face as she yelled at me. "Do you usually have your harem of women act when you aren't interested in a girl, or is it just me that you can't break up with face-to-face?"

I had no idea what she was talking about, so I asked her. "What are you talking about?"

"Don't play stupid with me, Severus Snape! I thought you were different from the others. I thought you actually liked me. Well, here's what I think of you!" She punched me in the face, and I must say, it was a heck of a punch. I'm going to have a black eye for a week. I was knocked backwards into the table, and my hand hit a plate of food, causing a piece of bacon to fly up and land in Sybil's hair. "I hate you, Severus Snape! I hope I never see your face again!" She ran out of the Great Hall, wailing like Moaning Myrtle. I still had no idea what was going on, but everyone was starting to stare and whisper, so I decided that breakfast wasn't really that important anyway. I grabbed my mail and went back to my dorm room to sort things out. I could still come up with nothing that I had done between last night and this morning that could have caused Sybil to go from really liking me to never wanting to see my face again. And who my 'harem' of women were. I had a hard enough time getting girls to come within a fifty foot radius of me, and she thinks I have a harem? Unable to come up with any answers, I opened my mail.

And there, all was revealed. One of them was my cousins, telling me that the Hogwarts dance was the best thing that had happened to the band in a really long time. It was nice, but useless in telling me what was going on. The other two were what provided the answers.

One of them was from Lucius, the other Narcissa. Lucius, being the older-brother character that he was to me, asked me to really think about the repercussions of dating someone with a reputation as a crazy, death-predicting Ravenclaw. He didn't exactly tell me off for asking her to the dance, but warned me to be cautious if I proceeded. Narcissa, on the other hand, said that Regulus had written her and Lucius with the latest news about my measly social life and that Lucius was quite worried that I wouldn't make the right decision concerning my reputation, so she and Bellatrix had taken care of my reputation for me. Well, they certainly took care of it. Instead of being the target of Marauder jokes and a greasy slimeball, I was now the biggest, cowardliest jerk in all of Wizarding England today. I hate Blacks.

However, I wasn't going to let the Black girls get away with this quite yet. Summoning up all the courage I had (after all, I am no Gryffindor), I left the Slytherin halls and headed for Ravenclaw. Even though I wasn't sure that was where Sybil was in the beginning, I was positive within ten seconds of getting to the stairs. Portraits buzzed as I walked by, not even bothering to keep their voices down. Phrases like "crying her eyes out in her dorm" and "Slytherin swine" followed me up.

I reached the Ravenclaw entrance and knocked on the eagle. "Which is better, Muggles or wizards?" it asked me.

"Neither," I snapped. "We're all human, and as such, all act in the same manner, whether they be awful or wonderful."

"Well thought," the eagle said, revealing the entrance. I went in, and again, everyone was staring. I was beyond caring, mostly incensed enough that I didn't need courage to keep me moving. There were two staircases, one presumably the girls' and the other the boys'. I picked the youngest looking Ravenclaw in the Common Room. Then I picked him up by his robes' collar and asked him "Girls side. Which is it?"

"Why should I tell you?" he asks me. He had a little tremor in his voice.

Being the Slytherin I am, I gave him the worst possible threat for a Ravenclaw. "Because if you don't, I'll blitz your brain with a few Obliviates. Then we'll see how much of a Ravenclaw you are." Go ahead and give me a detention for that. I don't care. It's not like you can impede any of my social life.

"The right! It's the right staircase!" he yelped.

"Is it charmed in any way?" I asked.

"Yes! Any boys who try and get up the stairs cause it to turn into a ramp!" I dropped him, trying to think of a way up the stairs, when Sybil just happened to come down.

"Severus, I thought I said that I never wanted to see your face again." Her tone was almost friendly, her face, boiling anger.

"Look, Sybil, Narcissa and Bellatrix acted without my consent. They're idiotic and far too nosy, but they don't represent my views. I really like you Sybil." She was crying again. What did I do wrong now?

"You don't have to lie to me on top of being a coward and letting others do your dirty work for you. I'm not stupid."

"I am not a coward," I said. "And I never said you were stupid or crazy, although if you're going to believe everything that you read, you just might be." And I just screwed the entire thing up royally. Merlin, I'm an idiot.

Naturally, Sybil got really mad when I said that. "I hope you die horribly, Snape. I hope you die by the very creature you are, bitten by a snake! Get out! Get out!" She then proceeded to throw a lamp at me. I dodged and it smashed at my feet, lighting the hem of my robe on fire. I got out of there fast, extinguishing the flames as I went.

Well, now the only non-Slytherin who didn't completely abhor me wishes me dead, and my robe is going to be above my socks until I can fix it or get a new one this summer. Nice going, idiot. No wonder everyone hates me.

Regulus is still avoiding me, Sybil and all of the Ravenclaws hate my guts, and hexes are flying faster than the rumors around here. Even Lily has been less around than usual. On a more positive note, the Slytherins needed an extra Beater for practise today, so I got to try and injure people without them thinking any worse of me than they already did. It helped reduce my anger a little bit, but not enough that I didn't end up lighting my Zorro costume on fire. Then I berated myself for being such an idiot; I could have transfigured it into a robe to replace the one that caught on fire.

So, such concludes this detention. I eagerly await the next one; I'm going to be collecting Flobberworm mucus for Professor Slughorn. Yay.