I've left you all with a cliffhanger last chapter so hopefully you guys won't really be disappointed. The song There, There Katie by Jack's Mannequin is featured in this chapter and all rights go to the artist.
"Katie!" I yelled in a whisper in my attempt to wake her up. She was still in a deep slumber so I closed her door and kneeled beside her bed to shake her. I received the same response as earlier: absolutely nothing. Now that I can actually see her, I noticed that there were actual tears falling from her closed eyes. It made me feel like crying too. I've always known that Katie was hurt but I've never seen her so vulnerable.
"Katie, please wake up." I pleaded as I wiped away her continuously falling tears. That still didn't get her out of her slumber. Unfortunately for me, Katie is one of the heaviest sleepers. Waking her up is almost an impossibility.
"Stop! Please stop! You're hurting me! Please! No!" she cried. I can't stand seeing her like this. What's going on? Who's hurting her?
"Katie, please. Just… Just wake up. I don't know what to do…"
"Help! Please, he's hurting me!"
"Who's hurting you Katie? Please, wake up." I begged. What was I supposed to do? How can I help her?
"Urg, Katie please don't kill me when you wake up." I said as I snuggled into her bed beside her. When she was younger, she used to always come into Kendall's room to lie beside him and he'll sing to her until she falls back asleep. Hopefully this will work.
"Katie, you're a brave girl. And I know it's only just started. But I'm gonna be there at six with some flowers on sticks that were clipped just to make the weak strong. And Katie it's a strange world. And girls can get so broken hearted. But if it were me and the Universe, I'd get the worst of this gong." I sang to her. She continued to stir a bit but soon enough she snuggled up to me, completely calm and peaceful.
I smiled. This is my Katie. The one who had no problems, no worries.
What ever happened to you love?
I woke up to an incredible but unusual warmth. I really don't remember the last time I've slept this well and felt so comfortable. I nestled closer to whatever was providing that nice comfort.
And that's when I felt it. Those big pair of arms, that rock hard yet snug chest.
I bolted upright in shocked. I refrained myself from screaming because I knew very well who was in bed with me. The smell of Cuda alone was enough to clue me in.
"James!" I hissed and shook him.
"Five more minutes Mama Knight." he mumbled and actually dared, dared I repeat, to drape an arm around my waist and pull me to him.
"James! Wake up! What the fuck are you doing in my bed?! James!" I screamed. I soundproofed my room so no one in the apartment would be able to hear me. However, despite me really wanting to scream as loud as I can, James wouldn't let me do that since he was practically squeezing the life out of me. One thing I never expected was for James to be a cuddler. And one heck of a cuddler he is. Damn, I really need to breathe!
"Stop Katie." he mumbled again.
Give him a minute…
"KATIE?!" he shrieked, finally releasing me and almost falling off my bed. I guess it's a good thing I got myself a king size. "I uh… I swear I didn't do anything!"
"Really? Then why are you here? In my bed? Suffocating me with your cuddling? Huh?" If I wasn't so peeved about the situation I would've definitely find great entertainment in James' embarrassment.
"You see… Last night, I was getting my nightly glass of water and well… Your door was open and I…" Just the mention of my door being left open allowed me to conclude what had happened. Gosh how can I have been so reckless? The entire room is soundproof but not when the door is open. "I heard you crying out and I… I just couldn't leave and… and pretend nothing was going on… I… I," he continued to explain.
"Get out." I ordered. James shouldn't have been the one to be embarrassed; I'm the one who should feel shameful.
For years I've been having night terrors. Every dream is different from the other but still exactly the same. Each of them revolving around the same person, always reminding me of a past I wish I never had. I can't even count the number of times I've woken up drenched in my own sweat, tears running down my face, my heart pounding and my throat hurting from the screaming I've been doing in my sleep. Nobody was supposed to know. My mom and Kendall didn't need to know that I still feared for my life. Carlos, Logan and especially James didn't need to know I had a fear, period. They all have their own lives and problems to worry about. They don't need me to add to their worries.
"I said get out." I repeated. I couldn't even look at James. I know that if I did I wouldn't be able to hide behind my mask anymore. It's bad enough that he's already been able to slightly see past it.
"What?" I asked, this time actually forcing my gaze on him. He had his arms folded over his chest and looked… Angry?
"I said no. I'm not leaving, not until you explain what just happened last night. You owe it to me Kit Kat,"
"I owe you nothing," I retorted. Who was he to tell me that I owed him?!
"Katie, I just saw you crying out for help because someone was hurting you. I'm no Logan but I'm pretty sure that that wasn't just some made up nightmare. Something happened to you and I want to know what is it." My heart swelled at the thought of someone wanting to figure me out and uncover the insecure and vulnerable part of me. But it wasn't enough for me to spill about my past. James doesn't need to know about it.
"It was nothing James."
"I don't believe you," he said.
We both stayed quiet for awhile. The only sounds in the room were our heavy breathing; him most likely from anger and myself from aggravation.
"I'm trying to forget James," I finally whispered. "But I can't do that with you constantly asking me these questions about it."
"I just want to help you," he answered, moving closer to me.
"You can't." Nobody can.
"You don't know that. Katie, sometimes things fall apart in order for other things to fall into place." I let out a small, barely there smile. I know that quote. I've always kept it in mind because it gives me a bit of hope. It's been about two years and I'm still waiting for things to fall into place. However, I'm starting to think that it's never going to happen.
"But you should know that things aren't going to fall into place on their own." I looked at him again. James really believed in what he said. I never thought of it like that. I always had the impression that things will just start getting better by itself and all I had to do was wait.
No words were spoken after. We were both just simply staring at each other, waiting for the other to say something. Finally, James sighs and gets up.
"Come on, get ready. We're still spending the day together and I don't plan on just sitting here."
I smiled and nodded. James would never forget what happened last night but I knew that for me, he would at least pretend to and I was thankful for that.
But more importantly, I was thankful for James.
So there you go. I know it's been a really long time since I've updated and many of you probably know why; I'm not yet back on track with my writing so please don't expect updates anytime soon because I highly doubt it will happen.
Anyways, let me know what you think!