Disclaimer: Ok so I'm horrible with summaries, but give this a whirl. I think it's going to be fun! Lemons coming (not in this chapter but soon!) which is the reason for the M rating. Also wasn't too sure on the genre's for this one either, so yeah. Hope you like it! Btw Charlaine Harris and Allan Ball own all this stuff. Enjoy!
I crawled up out of the dirt, bitching under my breath. I hate going to ground but I didn't have much of a choice last night. I hadn't found a meal until the wee hours of the morning and by then I was too far from home to get back before dawn. I couldn't risk hiding out in a building anywhere so I'd had to burrow. I got completely out of the ground and shook myself, trying to dislodge the biggest pieces of filth from my clothes. I stretched lazily and looked around. I needed to get some water to get clean, first of all. I tilted my nose up to see if I could catch the scent of a creek or pond somewhere nearby. I couldn't remember exactly where I was, but I knew I was a ways from home and there was no way I was heading back covered in filth. The air smelled clean and I closed my eyes to savor it. It smelled really clean. Weird. Whatever. I thought I caught a hint of water to the east, so I began to wander that way, putting my plans in order on the way.
First, get clean. Second, get home. Third, kick the shit out of Jessica. If she hadn't made such a ruckus at that pub last week, I wouldn't have had to roam so far last night. I was seriously pissed about the post Russell Edgington attitude toward vampires myself, but that didn't mean I was going to kick into super-slut gear and start drinking everybody's blood. Then again, I just couldn't stomach True Blood or any of that other synthetic crap, either. In any case, I was regretting bringing her along to London. It seemed like a good idea at the time, the whole 'see the world' plan Eric had come up with but after three weeks abroad I just wanted the backwaters of Louisiana. Two tears in a bucket, I guess.
Anyway, after laying a whooping down on Jessica, I'd go find Eric. I still couldn't forgive him for making me vampire when he knew that I didn't want that (which is part of the reason he had suggested this whole adventure in the first place), but I could sort of understand that it was an automatic reaction after what had happened. And let me just tell you that after all the things that had happened to me since I first met Bill, a car crash was the least of my worries. Just another example of the irony of life was that was how I'd died. Almost. Eric had been with me and he claimed that he had acted by instinct in turning me.
I'd thought my human life had been complicated, but after becoming vampire, I realized I hadn't even known the meaning of the word. I was still telepathic, only now I could hear everyone, all beings, crystal clear. Vampires, weres, shifters, fairies. You name it. Another neat side effect of my turning was my Fae blood. The little blue hand thing I was just learning to master with Claudine's help? Yeah, that was still there. Only now, with my vampire emotions being so strong and quick to change, it was a real miracle that I hadn't killed anybody yet. By accident or otherwise. However, over the last few months, I had made serious strides in reigning that in as well. I could channel it now into my physical strength, as opposed to an explosion out of my skin. The one good thing about that was I could overpower Eric. He could still whip me if he wanted to, of course. The strength was short-lived and hard for me to muster, plus he was my Maker and it went against every impulse I had to actually try to hurt him. But it came in handy every now and again and man oh days you should have seen his face the first time I bested him.
I made it over to that pond while I was thinking of these things and peered around for signs of people. I wasn't about to shuck off all my clothes in front of anybody but everything was clear. The woods were quiet, no sign of wildlife even, but then again they usually clam up when we're around anyway.
I peeled the dress off and tossed it in the shallow water near my feet, then made my way in. It was lukewarm and felt delicious on my skin. Must have been a nice, hot day. I slid down to my shoulders and popped my head under the surface, watching my hands wave in front of my face. The water gave everything an eerie quality, like I was looking through a murky glass. I scrubbed at my scalp to loosen the dirt out of my blonde hair and popped back through the surface.
The trees surrounding the pond were big. Huge, even. And dense. I didn't remember the wood being so thick that morning when I'd made my way in. Then again, I was pretty bloated and happy with myself so it's hard to tell exactly what I'd missed. I need to be more careful, can't be slacking in my old age. Eric would bust a gut if heard me refer to myself as old, seeing as how he was basically older than dirt himself. I'd only been a vampire for a few months now.
I suddenly snapped out of my musings with the sick awareness that I was not alone in the woods. I didn't stop moving, no need to alert them and give them the upper hand. I continued to scrub at myself until I appeared to be clean, then moved on to the dress I'd been wearing. I scrubbed it as best I could without soap, all the time calculating where exactly the intruder was positioned. I was fairly certain there was only one, and they were directly behind me, a ways back in the woods. I couldn't be sure if they'd seen me yet or not, but I knew they weren't human. No heartbeat.
I calmly waded out of the water, stark naked, and wrung the dress out on the bank. They were just behind me now, having decided to show themselves, apparently. I calmly turned and looked straight into a chest. A big, bare chest. I tilted my head back, then back a little further, and stared directly into Eric's face.
"Jesus Christ on a piece of toast, Eric, you scared me half to death!" I screeched up at him. He flinched backward at my words, his eyes widening. "Oh spare me, don't act like you don't wanna laugh," I told him, my initial fear turning into annoyance. I realized he was wearing some kind of velvet pedal pushers and he was holding a frilly white something in his hand. "What the hell are you wearing? And what are you doing out here in the woods?" I asked, shaking my dress out. One of the benefits of him being my Maker was that I couldn't care less if he saw me naked. Since I was turned, we'd done it six ways from Sunday on a regular basis. Definitely a big perk to having him as a Maker.
"Who are you and how do you know what I am called?" he asked, his accent much heavier than usual. I scoffed and cut my eyes back up to his, noticing with a start that he was in a defensive pose. I squinted my eyes at him slightly, trying to figure out his angle. His face was serious; his ice blue eyes wary, his strong jaw clenched, those lovely lips of his pursed slightly.
I cocked an eyebrow as if to say 'For real?' and waited for him to speak. He cocked his eyebrow right back and remained mute. I sighed.
"What in hell are you talking about, Eric? It's me, Sookie. Don't play stupid. And I don't think this is very funny considering that whole thing with the witches last year," I said grumpily, pulling the dress on over my head.
"Sookie?" he said my name awkwardly, that accent of his twisting it up. I looked up at him, annoyed. Something in his expression made me pause, and I started to get really creeped out. I could not handle another bout of amnesia with him, and Pam was back home managing the bar. She had opted out of the 'family outing' as she referred to it, claiming she didn't want to leave Indira alone at Fangtasia. Knowing that Eric could feel her through their bond, it wasn't that big of a deal. But if he lost his mind again, I didn't know how I could get her here fast enough. I decided to soldier on, acting like nothing was out of the ordinary and hoped like hell he would start cracking up any second.
"Yep, that's me. Now get out of my way, I wanna get home and get some other clothes," I said in a normal tone of voice, taking a step to the side so I could get around his big Viking ass. He stepped in front of me immediately, blocking my way. My temper flared (I hadn't exactly perfected that yet) and I hauled off and punched him without really thinking about it. He flew backwards with the force of it and I immediately felt bad. I rushed forward to apologize.
"Stop," an imperious voice behind me call. Fuck. I'd let all of my attention focus on Eric and had failed to note another presence. Who the hell could this be?
I turned to see an equally handsome vampire standing in a clearing about 100 yards from me. He was more average height, approximately 5'10" or so, with dark hair cut close to his head. His face was lovely, there really is no other word. His lips were full, wide and luscious and the planes of his face were totally flat. He had deep brown eyes, perfectly spaced and a wonderfully Roman nose. I realized with a sickening twist in my stomach that it was Godric. Eric's Maker. Who I had personally watched meet the sun. "What in the holy hell is going on here?" I thought frantically.
"Who are you?" He asked plaintively. My mind was racing a mile a minute and I could feel a Grade-A Freakout coming on.
"My name is Sookie," I answered, hoping I sounded normal. I noted with a lurch that my hands were shaking; that hadn't happened since I was turned.
"My name is Godric," he said, quite calmly. "How old are you?"
"Um, twenty seven," I replied. He looked mildly surprised.
"How old is your maker?"
I glanced back at Eric by reflex. He was standing, watching me warily. I looked back at Godric, trying to tamp down the panic rising in my chest. "About eleven hundred years old."
"What is the year?" he asked. I wrinkled my forehead.
"The year I was made?" I asked, unsure. He nodded the tiniest bit. "2011." I answered.
"I don't understand," he responded. I had not the faintest idea of how to respond to that, so I didn't. There was a long pause in the conversation, during which I tried to think what the fuck was going on here. I had a Guinness World Record case of the willies and wanted nothing more than for somebody to jump out of the woods yelling, 'Just kidding!' but I really didn't think that was going to happen.
"I'm not sure what you're misunderstanding," I finally said, to break the silence. He was silent for a few moments longer.
"You are saying you were created in the year 2011," he answered. I nodded. "Two thousand and eleven years." I nodded again. "Since what?"
"Now I don't understand," I said, mind racing to come up with a possible explanation. I was honing in on one but my sanity was rebelling against it.
"Two thousand and eleven years since what? What are you basing this number on?" he asked, completely in earnest. I paused.
"Since Jesus?" That was basically all I could come up with to answer his question. He looked at me like I was a lunatic, which is funny because I swear that's how I was looking at him. There was basically only one explanation for this, but the question I needed to confirm it was stuck in my throat. All I could do was stare back at him, searching his face and hoping I would see that it wasn't really Godric. But it was. Finally, I was able to ask. "What year is it now?" There was silence for a few moments before Eric spoke behind me.
"The year of our Lord 1532."
Well I'll be a son of a bitch.
A/N: Sookie thinks a little more like me than herself in this story :)