Hey, kiddies! Here's a quick Prussia x Austria written for my dearest friend, Mushroom. I hope you like it ^^



What to say about Gilbert Beilschmidt? Well for starters, he was loud, obnoxious, and could make even the most youthful grow grey hairs. Secondly, he was quite notorious for randomly popping out of nowhere, invading my kitchen for food and leaving a mess behind. Lastly, about ninety percent of the time I see him, he's wasted and/or in the process of becoming wasted.

Indeed, he was an absolute nuisance. The way his footsteps echoed to the music room as he strutted down my magnificent hallways without a care in the world irked me to no end. The way he abruptly interrupted my piano composing by slamming the colossal doors open, yelling in his easily distinguishable irritating voice made me want to pull my hair out. The way his words slurred as he began singing some wretched American pop song nearly caused my ears to bleed. Yes, it was all truly a disturbance to my peaceful daily life.

The least he could do is leave me alone on this particular day...

I could tell that Gilbert was drunk again. His abnormally discolored hair stood askew and his eyes were glassy. He stumbled through my music room mumbling something about looking for bird feed.

He then proceeded to grab the cello sitting in the corner of the room and strum it as if it were a guitar. My composure crumbled as I witnessed the intoxicated man abhorrently abuse my precious instrument. I rushed over to him and seized the stringed instrument.

"Gilbert, what are you doing in my Music Room? And why must you be intoxicated all the time?" I sighed. He was rather drunk, for I could smell the alcohol from where I stood.

"Heeeeey! Yo, Rod- Ahaha, get it? Rod! Like, y'know manrods! Ahah!" He took this time to laugh at the sexual innuendo that he somehow associated with my name. "Anywhoos, I didn't see ya there! You tranin' with that cute Japanese kid to be a ninja or something?" He plopped himself down in the chair sitting behind my piano, smirking.

"No, Gilbert, I do not engage in such activities with Mr. Kiku. Now, answer my question. Why are you here and why are you drunk?"

"Why wouldn't I be? I just came back from West's place. I knew you wouldn't have any beer in here 'cause I checked before. Ugh, I'm hungry. Ya think I can ask your hot maid chick for a sandwich or something? Ahah oops, that sounded sexist."

I was writing down several new notes for my latest music piece, only partially listening to the Prussian's rants.

"You can go and make your own sandwich. Elizabeta is busy baking a cake for some sort of birthday celebration."

"Who's birthday?" I scooted back as he leaned in dangerously close, his red eyes widening with curiosity.

"...Mine." I inhaled, somewhat disappointed that everyone always managed to forget my birthday. I dared not to look up from my work. The room fell silent for several moments. Oh, how I savored them before Gilbert spoke up again.

"...Really?" I glared at him before deciding to drop the conversation by returning to my piano composition.

I erased and fixed a few notes before playing through the whole song, simply ignoring the Prussian. As I listened to each chord echo throughout the room, I could feel all the stress gradually melt away.

Ah, yes. This was where my heart was. This is when I'm at my utmost peaceful state, especially on this special day; although, having a drunken Prussian in my presence somewhat altered it.

I grinned triumphantly after striking the last few chords. I had managed to play through the whole twelve-paged piece without making the slightest mistake. I could feel the new warmth of victory flood in.

Turning to say something to Gilbert, I found that he was not present anywhere in the room. Of course, now I worried for the safety of my home. I shuddered as I mentally pictured the albino knocking my antique vase collection over and sexually harassing the staff.

Scurrying through the large hallways, I searched for Gilbert. I finally reached the kitchen to see Elizabeta concentrating on her baking. She spun around as she heard me enter, and gasped.

"R-Roderich! What are you- AAHHH! D-DON'T LOOK!" She hastily turned and attempted to cover something up. I glanced at her questioningly. Her cheeks quickly tinted with red. "Oh! I didn't want you to see your special cake yet." She laughed nervously before looking down to play with a loose string on her apron.

"Ah, I see. Have you seen Gilbert around here? I can't seem to find him anywhere." Upon hearing this, she pulled a frying pan seemingly out of nowhere and grinned wickedly.

"Ohhhh, Gilbert? No, I haven't. But if I do, I'll tell him that you are searching for him." She slipped the frying pan back to wherever she got it and resumed decorating the cake.

Where in the world has that damn albino gone?

Scanning through each room, I could find no trace of him there. No shattered vases. No molested staff victims. Nothing.

I paused. In the distance I could hear someone calling my name-Or rather, 'Roddy'. I immediately paced towards the agitating voice. As I stepped closer to the source of the yelling, I could see Gilbert's head pop out from behind a door.

"Rod! There you are, ya prick! Get over here!" He stuck his hand out and motioned for me to walk over.

Groaning, I stomped over and requested to know what the hell he was doing playing 'Hide and Go Seek' in my house.

"'Cause it's fun. And I'll make this even more fun if ya want." He grinned widely.

"No, I would rather you lea-AH!" Gilbert suddenly grabbed my arm and pulled me into the room. Awkwardly attempting to regain my balance, I toppled into his arms.

I straightened my glasses and scowled at him. Trying to break free of his grip, I then realized that he was stripped down to his underwear.

I halted and gazed up at him. I could feel my body heat up under him. Dear GOD... W-w-what was going on?

"Like what ya see?" He pressed his body against mine. Excuse my foul language, but HOLYMOTHEROFGODWHATTHEFUCK.

"W-what is th-the meaning of this?" I felt him smile as he pressed his lips against the side of my neck. Withdrawing his lips from its place, his ruby eyes bore into my own.

"Giving ya what you deserve. Y'know... As a birthday present, because I suck as a friend and totally forgot about your birthday." Guilt flickered through his eyes.

"N-no," I hesitated. "Th-There's really no need for that! I-I never really get presents anyway!"

"You don't?" He looked horrified. Receding from his arms, I slowly reached for the doorknob.

Gilbert quickly caught on and grasped my arm, yanking me closer yet again. His eyes were hazy with guilt and what I think was sorrow.

"Please, Roderich. I really want to do this for you." He now looked quite stern. "And I'm not taking no for an answer."

I opened my mouth to speak but before the words departed, he had sealed his lips upon my own. He laid his hands on my waist and scooted even nearer.

Alright, so you can only imagine my total shock at the moment. Lips quivering, face flushed, eyes as wide as possible; Indeed, I looked like a mess.

I groaned as his tongue unexpectedly intruded and brushed against mine. His hands slithered down my legs and abruptly propped them up. Gasping, I wrapped my legs around him for support.

Oh dear... Now I could see where all this was going. To be honest, I wasn't certain as to whether I actually wanted this to end. I wasn't sure if I wanted to go all the way in such a manner with such a person.

Meeting his eyes once more when he groped my nether regions, I shook with uncertainty. He stopped groping, a worried look replacing his smirk.

"Hey, Rod? Are you sure about this? Do you really wanna do it?" He stared quizzically. I could feel myself shrink under him.

"U-uh..Erm..." Wait? Was I trembling? Come on, Roderich! It's just a simple question! Gilbert rubbed small circles in my back, standing patiently as I battled between choices.

"Y'know, I was just kidding about that whole 'I'm not taking no for an answer thing'. You don't really have to-" I shut him up with a kiss. Dear god, he could talk a lot.

I buried my face in the crook of his neck before answering.

"Y-yes," I mumbled. He pushed my head back, grinning widely.

"Wh-what? Seriously? AWESOME!" An unmistakable sense of accomplishment illuminated from him as he picked me up and placed me on a table.

I finally realized that we were doing all this in the tea room and tried to stop Gilbert from ravishing my neck to tell him.

"Gil-Ah! G-Gilbert! C-could we do this e-elsewhere?"

"Nope. Sexy time is here and now." He snickered. I mentally facepalmed myself at his choice of words.

Hm, so we were going to do this here? Here, in the tea room? The room where I host all meetings with important musicians? On the very table where-

"Hmmmphh!" My eyes fluttered shut as the Beilschmidt slipped his hands into my trousers and began stroking me. I sighed. I guess there's no turning back now.

"Spread em." I snapped my eyes open.

"E-excuse me?" He was now kneeling on the ground, trying to pry my legs apart.

"So I can suck you off, duh." Oh my god... I instantly tensed up and shook my head furiously.

"Daw, come on Rod! It feels awesome!" His brows knitted in confusion. He attempted to spread my legs apart again and succeeded.

I figured Gilbert was quite the natural at this from what I had heard about him. Here he was, proving just that to me and I could not be more nervous-and admittedly thrilled- about it.

He licked his lips as he undid the buttons on my pants and discarded them. I could feel my eyes water as he rubbed and lapped at my erection through the boxers.

"Have you never had this kind of treatment?" He glimpsed at me curiously.

"N-no... Never." His predatory eyes locked on mine as he peeled the boxers down. I threw my hands up to cover my mouth so the embarrassing noises wouldn't escape when he traced his fingers up and down the erection.

I almost had a miniature spaz attack when I suddenly felt something warm encase my length.

"Mmmbb," He removed his mouth to lick the underside. "Damn, Roddy, you taste nice. A lot better than all the other guys I-"

He yelped when smacked his head.

"Shut up. Do you not realize how indecent it is to mention other bed partners you've had during sex?" Gilbert frowned.

"Aw, such a boner kill." I kicked him before he finally returned to pleasuring me with his overly-experienced mouth- Psh, with his whore mouth.

I heard the faint noise of a zipper coming undone and looked down to see Gilbert gripping his own erection. I blushed, hoping he didn't notice.

He continued to lick up and down the shaft, producing dirty comments as he did so.

"Like I was saying, you taste delicious. You should really have a sample of this. It's fucking hot." He kissed along the shaft before engulfing the whole thing in his mouth. I could hear his masturbatory hand moving faster. He groaned, deep throating my member as he did so.

Oh my... Mymymy... This was quite unbearable. Whimpering, I clenched my fists until my knuckles turned white. His whore-mouth was just so... So fantastic... S-so delightful... Yet so naughty... And he was actually masturbatingto this... Yes, this was definitely worthy of being pornographic material.

I could feel the vaguely familiar heat build up inside me as he sped his ministrations up. Ohhhh god... Shameful or not, Gilbert was truly skilled at this.

"Gil-Gilbert. I-I think I'm cl-close." He took a moment to simper and mutter a 'fuck yeah' under his breath before sucking at the tip and doing some sort of wonderful thing with my balls.

Before I knew it, I felt my body convulsing, spluttering copious amounts of semen down Gilbert's expecting throat. He moaned in satisfaction as the sticky substance dripped down his lips. Making several odd noises as I came down from my sexual high, I collapsed on the wooden table.

Gilbert crawled over my worn out body and placed a sloppy kiss on my lips. He made lustful sounds as his tongue dominated mine, my own cum transferring between them.

Holy damn. He just made me drink my own semen. I knew my face was completely red as I pushed his face away, the string of saliva still connecting our lips. He suddenly shook violently, grasping my shirt collar and yelling out obscenities ('Fuckfuckfuck, Roddy! Hnnnnngg! Aaaahh... Ohhhhhh!')

I stared at him, dumbfounded. He flashed another trademark grin at me.

"Heh. I came." He brought his arm up from between us to reveal a cum-covered hand. I squeaked and felt my blush deepen when he seductively licked his hand nearly clean. He noticed me observing.

"Wanna try?" He nudged my cheek with the hand. My eyes widened.

I- I might as well try...

His smugness was quickly replaced with surprise. I grazed his index finger with my tongue, tasting his seed.

I briskly sat up after the awkward silence that followed. "Not bad," I said with a sly smile. He beamed with cockiness, rolling off of me and landing on the ground with a thud.

"Y'know, that wasn't exactly sex, but it was pretty damn good." He threw his arms up in joy and eyed the roof wearily. Hesitantly, I mimicked him and toppled on top of him.

We lay there on my Turkish Rug, basking in our sexual afterglow for several moments. He lay on his back brushing his fingers through my hair, whereas I lay atop him on my stomach, flushing like a dumb schoolgirl. I broke the silence for once.

"Mmhmm. Next time, we do it, okay?" He barely looked fazed. Rather, he just dropped his head back onto the carpet and closed his eyes.

I assumed he was asleep and poked at his face. All of a sudden, he gently pressed my head forward to meet his lips. It wasn't exactly a deep one-considering the fact that we were both exaughsted-, but it wasn't a quick one either. I had the chance to tug at his silvery locks, urging him to go deeper.

However, he was already knocked out and snoring. I exhaled, reaching over and snatching a pillow from the nearest couch to place under his head. I continued to fondle with his hair as I thought.

Truly, Gilbert was irksome... But he was also a really nice guy. He's just the kind of guy who hides it under all that douche-baggery. He's the kind of guy who would take time out of his day to make you cheer up if you're lonely or stingy. I was honestly thankful to have him bother to visit me frequently. He was quitethe man.

A-and maybe I liked him... Maybe I liked him a lot.

All I know is that this was one of the more enjoyable birthdays I've had.

"Thanks," I mumbled before placing my head against his chest and falling into a deep sleep.


The "Anything for you, Rod" coming from the albino was barely audible over the clicking noises caused by Elizabeta's camera.

The girl snapped her last picture of the sleeping duo before casually slipping the digital camera back into her apron pocket. She happily skipped away toward the kitchen to add finishing touches to the large chocolate cake, giggling madly.

"Ahh, Rodreich. I wish you and your man toy the best for years to come."


FINALLY. I'm done! Was that okay? I'm never sure about my own works OTZ

There will actually be another Prussia x Austria fanfic coming up soon (with DRUNK Austria –w–) , so look forward to that :D