A/N: Enjoy! Sending a hi from LA. Watching the Fosters and Teen Wolf tonight. If you want an early update, harass me on Twitter: MsKatherineMJ
Some things we don't talk about
Rather do without
And just hold the smile
Falling in and out of love
Same damn problem
Together all the while
I stared blatantly at the clock on the wall. I could almost hear the arms hit the second marks. Or maybe I was imagining it.
I'd been doing this tango for about half an hour. Just staring at the clock.
The woman in front of me just tapped her pen on her notepad. I could tell by her Chanel boots that her profession pays well. Maybe I should become a shrink… but thinking about sitting on a couch listening to practical strangers spill all their problems at me… well it makes me want to pull my hair out.
But this woman's hair was obviously professionally kept. Perfect highlights, perfect length… I wondered if she was this meticulous with her personal life. Or maybe she's a wild animal under the sheets…
I shook that train of thought away. This hadn't been my idea. Why in the world did I need a shrink? Oh, right. PTSD. Apparently years away from Cullen and his demonic siblings weren't enough to forget the memories.
I glanced back at the clock. Okay… 28 minutes left.
"Why don't we start from the beginning?" Dr. Kate Denali started.
I crossed my legs at the knee.
"Your father mentioned that you came back to Forks…" she paused to check her notepad, "a few months ago. He also mentioned that you started having night terrors about a month after Edward Cullen started again in Forks High." She looked up at me. Her ice cold eyes were piercing.
"From the beginning?" I asked, finally tired of watching the clock. I wasn't going to let hundreds of dollars go to waste just because I hated the idea of a shrink prying inside my head.
She nodded. "Remember these conversations are kept private, and you are safe here. No one will know what we talk about."
I looked down at the Persian rug that covered the floor.
I nodded. "Fine, I went back to Forks after…"
A few months earlier…
It was a lovely ceremony in a hot spring, just outside of Phoenix. She pretended to be heartbroken at the idea of me moving back to Forks. But I knew she would be happy on her own with Phil, her new main squeeze.
My mother went through men on a monthly basis. Phil indulged her, which was my theory on how he kept her interested for so long. My mother and I weren't exactly close. I had chosen to stay with my dad, Charlie, after the divorce for a reason, but he chose to stay in Forks after the accident. I couldn't stay anywhere near the-family-who-shall-not-be-named.
I had moved out of Forks when I was ten. I was now moving back at the age of 17. In the middle of the school year…
Forks was a small, tiny town in the middle of a foggy and constantly rainy peninsula. I used to love it. Now it was a shadow of painful memories and broken relationships. A part of my life I was hoping I would never relive. Now I was going to have to live in it.
The plane ride over was easy. I had time to think and for once I wasn't nagged by Renee.
Two hours later I found myself sitting on the same bed I had seven years ago. The same wolf calendar, the same purple sheets, the same rocking chair in the corner, the same deep baby blue walls (lavender in the dark), and the loose floorboard I had once tripped on when I was seven.
I touched the purple sheets slowly. They were the same sheets I laid in when I was released from the hospital.
Everything was the same.
I had taken a taxi from the airport. Charlie was expecting me later on today. I wanted to come here on my own, without supervision. I wanted to see if it was still all the same.
It was as if time had stopped in Forks. I suppose change was afraid of rain.
Back to the present…
"So you went back to Forks because your mother remarried?" her red stained lips pouted after her question.
"No… I mean sort of. I was tired of being with Renee, and I kind of missed Charlie."
She raised her perfectly plucked eyebrow. "You call your parents by their first names. Is this because of the divorce? Do you feel as if your parents aren't exactly your parents?"
I shifted again, dropping my leg to the floor. "No, I love them… I mean…" I paused, not used to thinking so hard about my parent's divorce.
"Sometimes, children from divorced parents can feel as if they've raised themselves."
"No, it's not that. Charlie raised me, but it sort of got hard when I became prepubescent. I couldn't be a 'kid' anymore. It was hard for him to answer questions. I suppose the accident made it easier for him to let go."
"You refer to it as an accident. It was a premeditated attack. Edward Cullen meant to hurt you. He attacked you."
I felt my body heat rise. I shifted again, this time putting my other leg over my knee. I intertwined my fingers. I had the urge to cross my arms.
"You seem defensive and uncomfortable." She moved her body to mirror mine. Why was she mimicking my body language?
She raised her other perfectly plucked eyebrow.
"Why don't you continue? Tell me how Charlie acted when he found you at home."
"He didn't what?"
"He didn't find me at home. He found me on the porch. I was waiting for him."
Back in the past…
The look on his face said it all. Surprise. Pure surprise.
"Hey dad." I tried to smile, but it broke off in the end. I don't think he noticed.
"Bella!" I was in his arms in seconds. Charlie was never an affectionate guy. He was ice cold at times. Well maybe not ice cold, but cold. At least that's how I remembered him.
I noticed the hint of cologne first. Since when did he wear cologne?
"Your father is dating someone?"
"Yeah, he wanted to surprise me with a dinner at home. My dad can't cook. His new girlfriend can. Her name is Sue Clearwater."
She cocked her head to the side. "Clearwater… why does that name sound familiar?"
"You might've heard of her husband. He passed away. He was a famous hunter. Harry Clearwater. He had a heart attack while tracking a mountain lion who attacked a picnicking couple. It was about a year ago."
"Ah, yes. Now I remember." She smiled softly. Somehow in the setting sun's shadow, that smile seemed menacing.
"Our session is now over. I'll see you again next Friday. Seven o'clock sharp." She gathered her notepad and lifted herself to her full 5'10 height. "Goodnight Isabella."
I lifted myself quickly. My body wasn't used to sitting for an hour straight in an uncomfortable, and expensive looking chair.
She lifted her manicured hand for me to shake.
Her hand felt eerily cold.
I didn't have time to think about it. If I was going to get to Forks before ten I needed to get on the road now.
I rushed out like the room was on fire.
A/N: So that was the first chapter. A soft start I think. Any comments, questions, concerns, etc., can be left with a Review or a tweet. Have an awesome Monday night!
Song lyrics: Never Say Never by the Fray