Okay, so this is the first part of my challenge to myself. Can Yuuko fit of the CLAMP lovely boys into her house? Let's see how it goes. I really hope someone out there enjoys this, it's a wonder to write. I am giving myself a bit of poetic license, so bear with me as I change storylines and future plots to fit my own perfect CLAMPworld. Please let me know what you think, and do remind me if I've forgotten a crucial couple. I have left one out for the meantime though, gotta save something up for later. See if you can guess who? Any ideas or theories you may have please let me know! Enjoy the story~!

(CLAMP owns all the characters, but not their actions! 3)


"Take these to the old post box near the park~!" Yuuko imperiously told Watanuki as she simultaneously shoved the letters at him and took a swig of her cooling beer. Watanuki frowned as Yuuko passed him a wad of envelopes, all addressed and stamped.
"Why that post box? That's like 30 minutes away and have you noticed how freaking hot it is? This is crazy!" He shouted as he grabbed the bundle and headed towards the door. He knew by now that questioning Yuuko's wishes came to no good, but complaining always made him feel better about the tasks he was given.
Grumbling he slipped his shoes on and glared at Yuuko as she again swigged her beer. She has not bothered to answer Watanuki's question, she knew he knew it was important. She waited until he was about to shut the door to say: "Doumeki will be meeting you at the corner~!" She smiled at the answering scream and lent against the doorframe. This was going to be a good week for her, and maybe even a good one for Watanuki.
But probably not.

Doumeki calmly slipped the letter he was reading into his back pocket as he heard Watanuki approach. His usual grumblings and protestations eventually got louder until they escalated at the sight of Doumeki himself. Doumeki stoically undertook Watanuki's abuse and began walking towards the park, the oppressive heat seeming to have no effect on his attitude. "You'll only make yourself hot doing that." He commented to Watanuki as the other boy waved his arms about in rage. This, of course, only caused more abuse, but it did help the time to pass very quickly, and in no time the pair were standing in front of a surprisingly old post box. Grumbling, as per usual, Watanuki unceremoniously shoved the bundle into the slot and sighed. "Well, that was pleasantly un-magical." He commented. Just as the box shuddered and disappeared into time-space. Doumeki blinked, then turned around and made for home.
"WHAT? You're not even going to question that? It just disappeared! How can you just walk away from that? Hey! Come back here you bastard! Don't just leave me there! I could be sucked into it too! Is that what you want?" Ranted Watanuki as Doumeki made his way to the juice stand in the park. He stood there until Watanuki reached him, then asked for him to buy him a juice, much to the fury of his unstable companion.

Back at the shop, Yuuko was busy making preparations for next week's excitement. Or, rather, preparing a list of preparations for Watanuki to set up for her. She smiled slyly at Mokona as she wrote her list in her flowing cursive script; she simply could not contain her joy at the scheme she had prepared for her own entertainment! So eager was she to celebrate that, as soon as he got home, she asked Watanuki to prepare her favourite umeshu and snacks and bring them to her out on the verandah.
After complaining about Yuuko's greed and her disregard for his weariness, Watanuki looked at the list she had prepared for him. After almost going into cardiac arrest at the length, he just about fainted at some of the things actually written on it. Lost for words, all he could do was shoot a glare at Yuuko, tighten his apron strings and get to work.

To start with, he prepared every room in the shop for guests, each room with a double futon and two towels. He opened all the windows to let in the air. He swept and polished. He prepared the bathrooms for many people, new soap and other washing tools, including some he'd never seen in the bathroom before but looked a little suspicious.
After this, a room he'd never been in before was set up with a huge dining table, which he then proceeded to set with beautiful silverware. Two rooms on opposite sides of the house were set up as comfortable sitting rooms. One sumptuous and soft, with cushions to fluff and low tables to dust. The other room was set in heavy couches and deep wing-backed chairs, dark wood side-tables and an extensive drinks cabinet. Watanuki could only guess as to what was happening, but he hoped that he would not be expected to wait on all the people Yuuko planned to host.

A few days after the posting of the letters, Yuuko's mailbox was full of its own letters. Watanuki collected them and presented them to a reclining Yuuko, who delightedly pronounced them RSVPs. She was extremely pleased to see that all of her invitees were attending. Watanuki shook his head in confusion and went back to carefully padlocking all or Yuuko's important rooms so no intruder could stumble across anything terribly valuable.

The day before the gathering Watanuki was ordered to bring in flowers and fresh supplies. Yuuko was surprisingly active and often popped out of nowhere to comment on Watanuki's work, much to his annoyance, as well as parading up and down the halls in various different outfits, trying to find the perfect one for the next day. Maru and Moro followed her up and down, repeating all her comments. Watanuki was fit to explode, if it weren't for the fact that Yuuko had promised him the next few days off.

Yuuko lay back on her couch, a ring of cushions spread out in front of her. She casually puffed her pipe as Watanuki lay out things for tea. Breathing a cloud of smoke towards him, she calmly told Watanuki that their first guests had arrived. Before he had even reached the door Watanuki could hear bickering. Opening the door he revealed two people he actually knew, Kurogane and Fai. The latter grinned down at Watanuki and waved his arms about in excitement to see Yuuko, while Kurogane stood back and looked sullen. Both were shown in and were seated, Yuuko perked up and made delightful conversation, to the joy of Fai and the annoyance of Kurgs.

No sooner had Watanuki poured them tea there came a loud commotion from the front yard, which Yuuko sent Watanuki to investigate. He opened the door to a short un-evenly haired boy shouting obscenities at a tall and heavy set young man as an even taller and darker man in sunglasses laughed with a blonde androgynous figure with glasses in his arms. The scene surprised Watanuki, and he vaguely recognized the short yell-y boy of the group. They all looked a little suspicious, but Watanuki led them through to where Yuuko greeted them warmly, with a little of her sly smile tucked into her face. They were seated and given tea, all looked comfortable, although the boy with the weird hair seemed a bit angry to be there. They introduced themselves as Kazahaya, Rikuo, Saiga and Kakei

Next there was a polite knock and when Watanuki answered it he was met by yet another tall dark man, with an ethereally beautiful, floating person with him. As well as a couple of androgynous people. Quickly introducing themselves as Shuichiro, Kohaku, Hisui and Kokuyo, the group hurried ahead to meet Yuuko, three of them mysteriously hovering. Watanuki shook his head and followed them through to Yuuko, where he poured tea and felt terribly confused.

There was yet another announcement of guests, and Watanuki dashed to the door to find a military-dressed man accompanied by a young teenage boy. Introducing themselves as Gingestu and Ran they made their way inside, looking about in amazement at Yuuko's house.

The room was quite crowded now, and Watanuki thought that they must have been the end of the guests, but there was yet another announcement of someone at the door. Unsurprisingly there was another tall dark male, this time accompanied by a light-haired young man with large glasses. Both very politely thanked Watanuki, announced their names as Yukito and Touya, and entered Yuuko's chamber to be seated with everyone else. Yuuko frowned as she looked around the room, there were still six empty cushions, but it was high time that everyone found out what was going on here. Sitting up in her butterfly inspired kimono Yuuko addressed the gathering.

"We have gathered here today," she began, "to have some excellent fun, as well as to really get to know each other, intimately…" she ominously finished. A couple of the men cheered, but most shuffled uncomfortably on their cushions. "Oh all right, I'll come clean! You're really here for-"
There was a bang as four black-haired young men burst into the room, the shortest two appeared to be being chased by the taller two. The young man wearing gloves bowed politely and apologized profusely and quickly sat, quickly followed by the tallest man with an eye patch. The youngest of the group stared angrily about the room, looking as if about to burst into tears. Kindly, Watanuki guided him to a cushion and carefully watched as the last man took off his orange glasses and sat down. Yuuko simply smiled and motioned for Watanuki to pour them tea, casually introducing them to the group as Subaru, Seishiro, Kamui and Kamui, though; there was an agreement to call the taller Kamui Fuuma for now.

"Couples Counseling!" Yuuko announced with vigor as she rose to her full height. The room erupted with protests from the closeted 'CLAMP friends', while the canonized and aware couples chuckled characteristically into their hands. There were a couple of freak-outs. Kazahaya Kudo, for example, rose to his feet and began verbally abusing the party he had arrived with, with vulgar language and many rude gestures. Watanuki also had a brief rage when he realized Doumeki had been standing near him the entire time, and was egged on by Doumeki's stoic: "Guess she's dragged us into this too."

Once the crowd had settled, Yuuko made another announcement. "This is going to be a big job, and I can't possibly do it alone, so I have invited a guest counselor to help me out. Everyone please welcome: Tomoyo Daidouji, Hokuto Sumeragi and Fujitaka Kinomoto!" A beautiful young with long, dark hair, a vibrantly dressed young women with short black hair and a tall middle-aged man with glasses all entered the room. The one who introduced herself as Tomoyo had a hand-held video camera. Raising her hand to her cheek her face flushed with pleasure. "It's such an honor to be doing this; I can't wait to get started. Though, I would like to inform you that I have installed cameras in most rooms of the house, for… observations." Tomoyo smiled brightly and lowered herself next to Yuuko, her camera eagerly sweeping the room, capturing the images of all the beautiful and handsome boys/angels in the room. Next, Hokuto introduced herself, jumping about in excitement. "I can't wait to get started! It's finally time for Sei-chan and Subaru to realize their feelings! And hopefully everyone else too!" She sat on the floor in front of Yuuko, bouncing a little as some young men in the room gave yells of outrage and embarrassment. The boy called Kazahaya made an attempt at opening the door to run away, but Yuuko jump smiled and asked for him to resume his seat. After a moments panic, Fujimoto introduced himself calmly and kindly. "I am here to help you all become happy, and I hope that we can all become good friends." He said sweetly as he took a seat in a chair no one had noticed before. The newly formed team grinned happily out over the ocean of men. "We will be taking this one couple at a time, in order of relationship chaos levels. So please, enjoy your stay here!" Yuuko said as the crowd in front of her stared, some horrified, others confused, very few pleased.

After the hubbub of these exciting pieces of information died down, Maru and Moro entered with large bottles of celebratory sake, much the joy of pretty much everyone in the room. Except the under-agers and the little angel Kohaku.

There was some unwillingness as the couples were shown to their rooms, but most of them were slightly drunk from the party Yuuko had thrown, and the only outright refusals (Watanuki and Kazahaya) were soon put to an end by the stronger and more aware counterpart.

Tomoyo manned her station in a special room set up for her secret cameras, carefully watching the wall of screens she made notes. Occasionally her hand hovered over the warning button, for whenever something inappropriate was going on, but most of the time she just enjoyed her viewing.

Hokuto spent some time in her room, designing outfits for the prettiest of the boys and also reading up on some of her couples. She also did some research online; visiting many interesting sites which she believed would help her in her quest to set up Sei-chan and Subaru.

Fujitaka inspected the kitchen, carefully noting what was where so he could cook foods appropriate to each couple and help them through their problems with food made with love. He briefly entered Tomoyo's video room, to check on his son, but Tomoyo had turned off that screen for some reason. Shrugging, he returned to his room and looked at photos of his wife and daughter, both whom he would miss during his stay at Yuuko's.

Yuuko drank as she sat on the verandah with Mokona. She mused over the complicated and enjoyable task she had given herself, and wondered whether Clow would be watching to see how things turned out.


Please let me know. It's a big project and I really hope someone wants to enjoy it with me! Did you work out who's late?
What do you think of my counsellors? I thought Tomoyo was essential! Hope I'm doing CLAMP's characters justice, and I hope to resolve a few of those pesky issues between our favourite couples~!

Thankyou for reading~! 3