Coach Beiste stood amongst the entire football team, all of which had stripped down to their shorts and were sliding those off, their white jockstraps the only thing on underneath. "Alright boys, I need to take measurements from you today." She frowned, gritting her teeth. "Because I'm a woman, your principal believed this would be an inappropriate task for me. And the only male in the school who would agree to measure your bodies was… Mr. Hummel."

Angry chatter filled the room.

"Now I know that some of you may be uncomfortable with this," she continued.

"Damn straight!" Puck yelled, interrupting her.

"Nah, Kurt's anything BUT straight," Dave replied.

"Can it, Karofsky."

Coach Beiste quickly regained control of the conversation. "But I have to allow him to measure you guys, and unless you wanna quit the football team, you have to let him."

Dave was angry. Mainly to cover up the hidden inkling of desire he felt for Kurt, but also because a part of him hated knowing that Kurt would be so close to him physically yet they'd never be close emotionally.

That pissed him off.

Beiste left the room, shoving Kurt inside. "But I didn't agree to-!" Was all he managed to say before the door was slammed and locked, trapping him inside.

Kurt had a thing for jocks. To be in a room drenched in the sweat of a dozen jocks, and for those same jocks to be stood in near naked states in front of him, was very hard for Kurt. He bit his lip before croaking, "Hi, I guess."

Finn, naturally, was the first to stick up for his step-brother. "Look, I'm sure he won't try to molest us or anything."

Kurt smiled at that. He'd never try to molest Finn – they were brothers. But the rest of the team had no relations to him at all.

After an awkward 15 minutes of pulling and pushing things around, Kurt made an enclosed area for measurements to take place privately.

"Erm… Noah Puckerman's first." Kurt said, frowning at Puck as he groaned.

"Why me?" He muttered to himself as he walked slowly towards Kurt's makeshift enclosure. Kurt pulled the towel, covering the entrance and concealing them both.

Kurt looked at Puck in fear, before whispering, "What the heck am I supposed to do?"

Puck sighed at him, rolling his eyes. "Measure my chest first. Stop shaking, calm down."

Kurt grimaced at him. "Erm, what would you do if a woman walked in here wearing nothing but a revealing bra and panties?"

Puck looked at him then responded honestly. "I'd check that shit out. Damn I might even try to get lucky… why?"

Kurt frowned, looking to the floor. "Apart from Finn, you're all the hot women in that scenario."

Puck looked slightly annoyed. "Wait, are you calling me a girl?"

Kurt shook his head rapidly. "No! No. I said, you're-"

Puck laughed at him, causing him to stop mid-sentence. "Dude, I'm not as dumb as people think. I was kidding." Kurt breathed a sigh of relief. "So who in that room do you wanna jump on?"

Kurt looked up at him awkwardly. "Everyone… except Finn of course."

Puck grinned at him. "Kurt, how should I put this… the team isn't straight."

Kurt's eyes nearly fell out of their sockets. "Excuse me?"

Puck smiled at him. "Every member of our football team is bisexual or gay… apart from Finn."

Kurt sat down, his eyes still wide open. "Then why do they all pick on me?"

Puck sat down next to Kurt, his bulge bouncing as he hit the seat. He raised two fingers on his right hand, the palm facing Kurt. "Two reasons."

"One," He lowered his middle finger, leaving his pointing finger up. "If they pick on you for being openly gay, then nobody really suspects that they're gay."

"And two," He lowered the remaining finger, and then let his hand fall to his knees. "You're so… flamboyant. They're all gay or bi but none of them really hide much, because they act just like straight guys. You're a little girly, they're not."

Kurt sat there in shock, trying to take it all in. "You're pulling my leg."

Puck stood up and walked to the make-shift curtain-door. "Yo Azimio. Get your ass over here. We've got us a 42."

'42' was the codeword the guys used for 'sex situation'.

Azimio slid in, shutting the curtain. Puck grabbed him and pulled him into a sexual kiss, crushing his face against Azimio's. Both boys were growing bulges and Kurt just sat there in shock, staring at the pair making out.

"Holy shit," Kurt muttered, barely flinching at the fact he'd used bad language.

He usually hated bad language, making his dad throw quarters into a swear jar. He'd seen it at a friend's house when he was 8 and decided that they had to do it too. The swear jar had been emptied 85 times, whenever the total money reached $200 – for those without calculators, that's $17000. How did you think he got that car?

Azimio grabbed Puck and spun him around, slamming him over a bench. Puck moaned as his jockstrap was pulled down by Azimio's big, dark hands. Puck's nine inch snake leapt from it's elastic prison, slapping against his stomach hard. Puck moaned again as Azimio began rubbing his own nine inch beast up and down his crack.

Spitting into his hand a few times, Azimio jerked his cock a few times, then slowly shoved it into Puck's hole.

"Fuck…" Puck moaned as his tight hole was spread out by Az's wide cock.

Puck turned his head to Kurt. "Believe me now?"

Kurt nodded, his purse shoved against his crotch.

Puck grinned at him. "Come on Kurt, come get a little dirty."