Mayor Richard Wilkins III

Mayor Wilkins was having a blast, to put it mildly. The pure fear and panic: It was just delightful. He just had to tip his hat to whomever or whatever was doing this.

He strolled down the street, a big grin on his face, watching the residents of Sunnydale become overwhelmed by their fears. He knew that he had duties as the mayor and couldn't let this go on for too long; after all, he had big plans of his own. He was only a couple of years away from his Ascension and it just wouldn't do to have his plans all mussed up now. He had come too far for that. But he wouldn't halt all the fun just yet. Nobody could say he was a spoilsport.

He stopped short, however, when he was confronted by a truly horrifying scene.

"Ugh," he said, grimacing as he beheld what stood before him. The man in front of him was truly grotesque. His eyes and nose were running from what looked like a nasty case of hay fever and he was sneezing over and over again. And the brute wasn't even covering his nose!

Repressing the urge to shudder, Mayor Wilkins turned around and began walking the other way, although he could tell the sneezing man was still behind him, shambling closer.

And then he saw that he was trapped. How could this happen? Didn't the demon doing this realize that Mayor Wilkins was on his side? He was a fun guy! He enjoyed a party just as much as the next guy—as long as things didn't get out of hand.

The cap on the fire hydrant in front of him had come off and the hydrant was spewing its contents onto the sidewalk in front of him and the street next to him. He was blocked in. The hydrant's excretion was blocking two sides; the sneezing man was blocking one; and the brick wall of the building next to him was blocking his last escape.

With the ability to pick his poison, so to speak, Mayor Wilkins put his hand over his nose and mouth and began to wade through the hydrant's secretions. Ugh, it was clinging to him, getting its odor all over him.

It was still better than the germs of that ill man behind him. But gee, he really wasn't enjoying life right now, and that was just a shame.

I would take days to get the smell of the hydrant's hummus off of him.