Author's Note:

Heh.. Just found this in the middle of my other fics in a notepad XD

Oneshot, just for lolz...

How Shuichi would react if Yuki acted really, really OOC.. :3 Well, in my opinion... :3


Shuichi's freak-out

Shuichi quietly opened the front door to the house he shared with Yuki. He took off his shoes and put his bag down without making a sound. Then he padded over to his lover's office as quietly as was humanly possible. He stopped in front of the wooden door and prepared to burst through and glomp his unsuspecting grumpy writer. He hadn't seen him all day and just thinking about the man he loved, the singer had to stifle a girly giggle. Feeling the excitement bubbling up inside him, Shuichi put his hand on the door knob, turned it and- found himself lying on the floor with his target on top of him. Eiri Yuki – the popular lady-killer and famous romance novelist, known for his cold and seemingly unemotional demeanour, a man who hardly ever showed or spoke his true feelings – was glomping Shuichi like a giddy schoolgirl, acting like one of the singer's obsessed fangirls. Shuichi could only stare at the blond hair brushing against his cheek. In all of the three years they've been together, the boy had never, ever seen his novelist like this. The closest that he could compare it to was that one time years ago when Eiri acted nice and almost mushy in front of Shuichi – and that was when he saw that damn Kitazawa in him. But he still wasn't that emotional. It freaked him out then and this can hardly compare. Because now, Yuki was all of a sudden smiling and hugging Shuichi with all his strength – which was a lot.

"E-Eiri? I-is that y-you?" The singer tried to get up but the older man's weight pinned him down.

"Of course it's me, Shu-chan! Who else could it be? I'm so glad you're home! I missed you so, SO much!" The last sentence was punctuated by a bone-crushing hug.

"Eiri! Stop- can't- breathe-!"

"AHH! I'm so sorry, Shu-chan-wu-chan!" He panicked and got off Shuichi, letting the boy breathe.

"Wait. What did you just call me?"

"Shu-chan-wu-chan? It's your nickname, silly!" This freaked Shuichi out even more and he started hyperventilating. He got a brown paper bag from his pocket and breathed into it, trying to clear the unbelievable turmoil in his mind. 'Oh my god what is wrong with Yuki? What the FUCK happened to him? That's NOT my Eiri! And he hasn't had any psychological problems in years... Maybe something happened today while I was at work... Or maybe...'

"Tatsuha! This ISN'T FUNNY! Where's the REAL Eiri?" He screamed at the man standing in front of him.

"Whaaat? Waaah! How can you be so mean, Shu-chaaan! I'M the REAL Eiri Yuki! I love youuuu!" The creature that claimed to be his lover suddenly burst into tears. 'Holy... Maybe he hit his head or something? Still, there's a limit to how fucked up he could get from hitting his head...'

"Okaay... I'm sorry... Eiri... so... Umm.. How are you, Yuki?"

"I'm all better now that you're here, Shuichi!" He announced with a giggle. The unfamiliar sound gave the singer chills.

"Ok-Okay...!" He squeaked, backing away slowly with wide, terrified eyes. 'Maybe he's a clone? Yes! I'm sure the aliens saw us on TV a couple years ago and decided to come here because they're against gays so they decided to come here themselves and teach us a lesson! They've probably abducted my Eiri and are doing unimaginable things to him right at this very moment!' "Don't worry! I'LL SAVE YOU, YUKIII!" He screamed towards the ceiling with new found determination.

"What? But I'M Yuki! What's wrong, Shu-Shu?" The imposter who looked just like Eiri spoke with tears of hurt and confusion forming in his eyes. How very convincing(!)

"wWAAAAaaaAArrRRGGHHHhhhhHH!" Shuichi couldn't take it any more and ran out of their house, screaming like a madman all the way. When he reached a convenience store about two kilometres away, the boy finally ran out of breath and had to sit down beside the store's entrance. He put his head in his hands and started sobbing, desperately trying to figure out what he's supposed to do now. 'I can't go back there and act like nothing happened! I'm sure that that dumb clone already knows that I know what it's up to! The second I step back in that house, I'm doomed! It'll kill me!' "Yuukkiii..." He sobbed longingly.

"What are you doing here, brat?" A voice suddenly spoke up from beside Shuichi, startling him. He turned to face the man who just spoke to him and his face froze in an expression of utter disbelief and confusion.

"Yuki?" He was up on his feet and hugging the tall blonde tightly in seconds. "Yuki Yuki Yuki Yuki! Is that really you, Yuki? I can't believe it! It's really MY Eiri! MY Yuki! I thought I'd never see you again!"

"Off, brat. I've no desire to run for my life to my car before a hoard of hungry yaoi fangirls. Again..." Back then he swore to never take Shuichi anywhere in public if he could help it...

"OHMYGOD YUKI! It's REALLY YOU! YOU'RE my Eiri!" The comment that would normally successfully get the brat off him made it even worse so Yuki quickly moved to his Mercedes.

"Of course it's me, dumb-ass. Who else? You haven't mistaken Tatsuha for me in years.

"But Yuukiii! Where were you? Are you okay? Did they hurt you? They didn't mess you up, did they? Don't tell me they made you pregnant! Like in that movie we saw! Waaah, Yukiii! I don't want you to diieeee!" Yuki pulled Shuichi off of him and pushed him down into the passenger seat of the car.

"What are you talking about? I just went out to buy more coffee and cigarettes. This is the closest shop that has my favourite brands." He got into the car and pulled out, heading home.

"What? Then who...?"

* cue eerie X-Files-style music o.o *

Author's Note:

Well, that was short XD And weird... o.o
Fun to write though.. :3

Think I'll do an OOC Shu one next.. XD

And this was in no way meant to be a fic against all the fics where Yuki is really OOC... * shifty eyes *


Please review to let me know what you thought of it! :3

And thank you for reading! ^.^