(2,348 words) Okay so this chapter is longer! Good right? Oh by the way, I do a double update now so if anyone was confused as something's didn't make sense exactly with chapter 24, that's because you didn't read 23. A LOT of people didn't read 23, want to know, well you tell me the difference between the numbers 5 and 100. Because those were the hit counts on the chapters. I have no idea how I got 100, I think the website screwed up personally.

This is sad, so I tried to do my best, that's why it's longer.

disclaimer: Oh of course I own this, not.


26) tears


Lenne was sitting on the edge of Shuyin's bed, holding a moogle toy that had seen better days. He'd won it for her years and years ago; she saw it as an embodiment of the way their relationship used to be. He was sitting on the floor with his back against the bed, smoking and watching TV. He didn't pay any attention to her; he was too engrossed by what was flashing on the Television. He'd had his attention on her at first, but that didn't last for long.

She kept shuffling closer to the open window because she refused to let herself breath in a wisp of the smoke, even if it was a normal cigarette she'd still be against being near him. He laughed at whatever he was watching, she couldn't be bothered to lift her head up and see. It was probably something dumb and stupid, he was high after all. Instead of paying attention to what he was watching, she busied herself with the toy in her hands. She picked off fluff and threw it in the air, flipping it.

It wasn't very amusing, but it was what she used to try and keep herself entertained when she was stuck at her trashed house. It reminded her off better times, before Shu got addicted, before her mother sunk into a great depression because her dad left them. She brought it here as a reminder, so she wouldn't feel as bad, because she knew she couldn't do anything to help, he'd asked for help heaps long ago now, but she hadn't done anything to help. What could she do? She didn't know, she didn't have a place to start from. Sometimes she told herself to just stop coming here, but then even though the thought swirled around her head a million times over each day, she still found herself coming here again and again. Having to see his little sister with a face completely blank, being terrified his mother was going to find her. Then she got to see him in this state, high out of his freaking mind.

"Hey Shu?" She whispered, doubting he'd even heard her.

"Huh?" Shuyin tilted his head; he looked at her with a peculiar expression, so Lenne didn't doubt he'd forgotten she was there.

She bit her lip, and looked away from his face, "Never mind."

Shrugging it off he turned back to the TV and forgot about her again.

Lenne shook with a sob, but forced in the tears that threatened to fall. She didn't want this anymore; she didn't want to see her best friend like this. She edged to the other side of the bed and sat by his head. He eyed her leg for a second then switched his gaze to what it'd been on previously.

"Why do you do this?" She muttered, resting her head in her hands. It had been to herself; she didn't remotely care if he noticed she said anything.

He inclined his head and saw her crying face, but made no response to it. He was far too out of it to care about what she was doing.

Near absent-mindedly he wrapped his arm around her leg, Lenne flinched and tried to kick to loosen his grip.

"Don't." She commanded with a childish voice.

"Don't what?" He asked back.

She pouted but he wasn't looking at her face right this second.

Then, without a warning or slightest care to her thoughts he scrambled up onto the bed and pushed her down before climbing on top of her.

"Ah! Shu what are you doing!?" She yelled back he acted like he didn't hear a thing.

He picked up a stray lock of hair and ran it over his fingers, looking at it strangely. Then he let it go like he'd gotten bored, and instead cupped her cheek and forced her closer.

"What do you want?" He asked in a hushed tone.

Lenne looked at him quizzically, "Want what? Let me go!" She struggled to make him lose his grip but instead he wrapped his other arm around her waist.

"Didn't you say you liked me?" He asked as he ran his hand down her cheek.

She shivered and pulled her head away. She did let that slip once; she was surprised he remembered it. She was dead sure he would forget about it. "So what? Let me go Shu!"

When she tried to pull away again both hands gripped her waist.

"If you do then why are you so against this?" He questioned, acting as confused as one can be.

Then it dawned on her what he wanted. She almost screamed but no sound came out of her agape mouth. She grabbed onto his wrists and attempted to pull herself out from under him, kicking repeatedly, but there was too much weight on them to move them properly.

"Shu no! Let me go! Yes I like you but that in no way means I want this, let me go!" She wracked his arm with her fist

He moved his arm out of her range, and instead cupped her face, catching her lips in a kiss.

"Why are you struggling?"

Lenne spit in his face and yelled, "I already told you that! Now let me go!"

But again he ignored her plea and held her tighter so she was forced to stop all her struggling. He kissed her again and tugged her shirt up.

"Shu!" She cried as tears finally fell. "Stop this! For the love of Yevon stop this!"

"But I don't want to." He replied, mumbling.

He wrested her clothes off of her, even as Lenne continued to kick and hit him. Whatever she did got no reaction out of him. She may as well be dead still.

Eventually she her mind accepted fighting was useless, so she laid there and tried to use all her tears as a distraction from the horror of what was happening to her. The entire time, she swore he didn't even notice her sobs.


When Shuyin was done he climbed off her like nothing had happened, immediately she distanced herself from him, and crawled into a pitiful ball on the other side of his bed, crying and shaking, too scared to do anything else. With trembling hands she gathered up her clothes and hastily put them back on. Lenne went to get off his bed but stumbled on her unsteady feet and fell down; cutting her arm and leg on one of the piles of assorted objects and trash he had stuffed about. Tears of pain mingled in with tears of fear then, but still Shuyin acted like he was blind.

She picked herself up, and steadied herself, her breathing was fast and sharp, and her chest felt like it was being crushed. Her hands shook, she watched them as they did; she sick of what she was feeling, she sick of looking at the man in front of her. She wanted to puke her guts out, everything was broken; it was shattered into a million pieces like glass. She should've stop seeing him long ago, but she couldn't stop herself because of sweet memories of the past. Lenne held her shaky hands closer to her, in front of her mouth, feeling like they were a barrier for protection.

She stepped up to him, and with one hand slapped him in the face. She couldn't stand the blank way he was just staring.

He didn't care! He didn't care! No one cared anymore!

She bit down on her lip, hard enough to draw blood, how dare he do such a thing to her; they used to be friends didn't they? It was sick, it was disgusting. And now she felt broken. So why couldn't she just say she hated him?

She swallowed over the lump in his throat, and looked into his void eyes with a look of sympathy. He didn't understand, he couldn't understand. She didn't want anything to do with Shuyin anymore, she felt like her skin was burning, like she was weak and worthless. Even though she knew she'd probably go and break this promise later, she promised that she had to stop coming to this place. She looked up to him one last time, with a sympathetic hateful look, before storming out.


The cut on her arm and leg stopped bleeding half way home, the blood turned crusty around the injuries themselves, but the reddish brown streaks were thin enough for no one to take notice. Lenne felt even more negative, because despite her injuries being too hard to see, her crying face was clear, and perfectly in sight even with her head down. But everyone that walked by her were too concerned with their own matters to care for the sobbing teen, so they strode by like everything was right in the world.

Nothing was ever right in this world.

She wiped the wetness of her face, her eyes were red at the edges, but it could be far worse. It wouldn't be too hard to hide, she could put her hair in her face so when she walked by her mum the woman wouldn't see, if she realised her daughter was home at all. Lenne got to the front door and tugged on the doorknob, finding it locked. She kneeled over and picked up the key her mum left under the mat and inserted it into the lock. She was stopped from what she was doing by a timid voice behind her,

"Um excuse me?"

Lenne twisted on her feet to look and see a short woman standing a few feet away. She had long brown hair tied into a bun with blonde streaks by her fringe, and held what looked to be a small package or an overfilled envelope in her left hand.

"Yes?" The teen asked, pulling strands of hair over her face so the stranger wouldn't see her red eyes.

"You're Lenne right?" The older woman asked, nervously like she was doing something wrong.

"Yeah?" Lenne answered, she took in this woman more. She looked to be in her mid to late twenties and had a very small and slender form. Her build and appearance sounded familiar, but she couldn't put her finger on where she'd heard such a person. So she decided it be best to let her continue so she could get the answer.

"Oh thank goodness, I have to leave very soon so I'm very glad I got it correct first go. I've been freaking out all day I'd get the wrong house." The stranger sighed outwardly; acting like a heavy weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Right away the shyness she'd exerted previous evaporated and now in front of Lenne stood a woman with confidence.

She took in a breath to calm herself before getting on with what she came here for. She held out her hand with a small smile. "I've always wanted to meet you since I finally got my husband to mention you." She grinned before realising she hadn't explained one bit who she was. She flushed red before adding, "I'm your dad's wife. I just..I" She stuttered and the shyness came back full force as her voice let her.

Lenne blinked in surprise as she struggled regaining her courage. She knew she knew this woman in some way or another. Though she had never met her, her mother had complained about her at a constant rate. Saying she had the plainest personality, and physically nothing about her stood out, she was short, flat-chested and her face was so ordinary. Lenne was sure that was just a woman angry over having lost her husband to her, even if what she'd claimed about her body was dead-on her face was very pretty.

"I want to apologise for what he did to you and your mum!" She yelled finally, smiling sadly. "He does love you, but he knew from the start him and your mother were never meant to be, it's her fault he left. He was too scared to face you because he knew your mother was bound to tell you lies out of spite."

Without waiting for a response she continued, she held up what she had in her hand; a brimming envelope. "Here, from what I heard your mother doesn't earn very much. It's to help you a little."

Lenne nodded in understanding and took the envelope from her, finding it was stacked full of money.

"He knows I have it; don't go thinking I stole all this from his wallet." She paused, Lenne was too busy looking at the money, she'd never even seen this much before much less hold it in her hands, so she didn't notice how the expression of the other changed.

"Why are you crying?"

Lenne's eyes opened wide at the comment, a hand went to her cheeks, finding that, yes, she was crying.

"I..I didn't even notice." She mumbled, mostly to herself.

The other nodded and began to walk off. She smiled a smile that didn't reach her eyes, she believed the teen was crying for what was happening; even she had been blind to notice something was wrong with her from the start.

"Do whatever you want with it, probably hide it from your mother though." She said before leaving, disappearing from Lenne's line of sight.

The teen stuffed it in her pocket before entering the house and running into her room. She crashed onto the bed, and cried until her eyes were puffy and red. Until she was so exhausted she fell into the world of dreams.


Did I do good? Please tell me!

And I want someone else answering me other than my sister and the one other reviewer! Don't ignore me you'll make me depressed. Like you already have, for the past year and four months, because you have never reviewed. When somewhere inside you know you should.

Now I'm going to go read Inuyasha, it's so good! It's a shounen but because a woman writes it it has the best elements of a Shoujo and a Shounen, it's awesome. And screw you Inuyasha I like Miroku. Though if he really existed I wouldn't want to meet him. If I did, something tells me at one point I would break his face.

Inuyasha fans would understand that perfectly, bye bye!

~Serah Villiers Valentine